Every time I look at you I go blind [Jake]

[Morgan Tonaya]

Morgan had finally gotten Jordan to learn all of the commands a seeing-eye dog needed. He stopped before crossing the street. He knew which side to walk on. He knew places like home, kitchen, bathroom, and bed. Really he was an excellent sight dog, and had graduated guide-dog school with flying colors. To celebrate, the class (people and their guide-dogs) had taken an adventure to the dog park. Their instructor was keeping an eye on everyone, and had even offered to car pool, which was excellent since Morgan wasn’t sure he could make the walk to the park without getting lost.

He was playing fetch with Jordan, when he heard the dog’s distinctive howl-bark. It was the sort of sound he made when Morgan arrived home from work. He heard it getting further and further away and stood up, taking his cane in hand and moving swiftly after the noise. “Jordan! Sit!” He commanded, tilting his head to try and hear the dog. “Come, Jordan.” Morgan called, holding out his hand, palm down in front of him.

Morgan felt Jordan’s head brush up against his hand, but the dog was off again once Morgan had gripped his harness. Stumbling after the dog and trying not to fall, Morgan managed to keep him from jumping on whatever person Jordan had been barking at earlier. Laughing, Morgan pulled the dog into a sitting position. “Jordan, no.” He admonished. Morgan smiled at his feet, his dark glasses shielding his unfocused eyes from the sun. “I’m so, so sorry.” Morgan apologized emphatically.

“He didn’t hurt you did he? Or like…steal your sandwhich?”

[Jacob Lawrence]

Although Jake found Gabe's antisocial tendencies to be somewhat amusing, he also knew that he'd have to work on those. That was why he'd just taken Gabriel and Beta (who inherently loved people) with him for an extra walk today. He hoped that without the distractions provided by Ein and Buccaneer that Gabe would learn to be a little more people friendly.

They followed the normal path because Jake thought that Gabe would be more open to people in familiar surroundings. What he hadn't expected was a sudden influx of people and dogs around the lake. Beta was entirely excited for new companionship and he tugged at the lead to go play with the other dogs, but even though Jake encouraged him, Gabe sat steadfast by his feet. “You're just a stubborn thing, aren't you?”

He knelt down to pet the dog when suddenly there was a familiar bark that didn't belong to either of the two he had brought. Looking over his shoulder, he noticed what was undoubtedly Omega. Sure, he had grown in the time since MSAD's demise, but Jake recognized that puppy face and that bark. Worse was his recognition of the man attached to the harness.

Morgan.

“He's fine.” Jake wheezed, his chest tight with a mixture of anticipation, guilt, anxiety, and even fear. Cobalt had told him that Morgan had been blinded, but to see him standing there, holding the harness and wearing those glasses just made it all the more real. Would Morgan recognize his voice? What should he say? With all the panicking going on in his head, Jake was practically frozen to the spot.

Beta came barreling back to the combined scent of a person and a dog that he knew, putting his stubby paws on Morgan's knee and wagging so hard that his entire body shook. “N-no, boy, get down.” It was only out of worry for how Morgan would react that Jake tried not to give himself away.

[Morgan Tonaya]

“Ah, hah hah. That’s good. Good.” Morgan said, having to form his words through his chuckles as he bobbed and swayed to Jordan’s incessant pulling. “Stay Jor.” Morgan said to the dog, waiting for his movements to die down to just the wiggling of his tail-wag before releasing the harness. “Good boy.” He said off-handedly. “He should stay off you now….” Morgan muttered. “He just really likes people.” Scratching the back of his head and pushing up his glasses, Morgan shook his head. “Which is both awesome and annoying.”

Morgan’s hand groped around for Jordan’s head to pet, but fell on Beta’s instead. “Oh!” he paused, hand hovering over the dog’s snout. “Hey there little guy.” Morgan cooed, scratching the short pup behind his ears. “It’s cool, I love dogs.” Morgan insisted, ruffling his hand over Beta’s face. “I mean, unless you have someplace to be.” He laughed again. “Then just tell me to go away.”

[Jacob Lawrence]

Someone up there hated him, he was sure of that now.

Despite the way his heart was pounding rapidly in his chest and the irrational fear he had that Cobalt was going to pop out of the nearby bushes to punch him in the face again for talking to Morgan, he couldn't deny that it was nice to see the teacher again. He'd missed that face and that smile in ways he hadn't even realized until they were in front of him once again.

"It's alright. I really like dogs." It was a relief to see Omega and to know that someone so wonderful was taking care of him. If he'd had the capability, he would have taken all the dogs before he left, he only hoped that the others were all safe and loved as well.

Gabe was still sitting steadfast by Jake's feet, looking up at Morgan rather apprehensively, while Beta was enjoying the attention provided to him. "I think he likes you." Jake finally managed a smile, not that Morgan could see it. (And, oh, how that bothered him. He could only blame himself for that.) But when Morgan suggested leaving, Jake spat out a "No!" without even thinking.

"I mean... no, I don't have anywhere to be." He corrected himself, looking down at Gabe once more. To be honest, he didn't want this to end so soon. How he'd thought over and over of what he'd say to Morgan if he ever saw him again, but even with all of that going on inside his head, he still couldn't bring himself to reveal who he really was. He didn't want to chase Morgan away again. "I was just bringing my new dog out to socialize. He's... still not used to other dogs and people yet."

[Morgan Tonaya]

Morgan jumped slightly when the other man forcefully blurted out a no, his eyebrows raised in surprise. He chuckled good-naturedly to break the awkward moment and shrugged his shoulders. “Well this is the place to be. It’s really helped Jordan out with the hyper-ness. He’s a great guide dog.” He scratched the still wiggling dog under his highness. “Yes he is.” Morgan cooed in that weird dog-talk voice that all men have.

Frankly, Morgan didn’t mind that things were a little weird. Most people didn’t really know what to do around a blind man. Morgan had gotten used to that really fast. It could also be that this guy was looking to socialize himself and not just his dog.

Being the friendly guy that he was, Morgan extended his hand out in front of him (in the approximate direction he gauged Jake to be). “I’m Morgan, by the way. “ he introduced, laughing when Beta – dissatisfied that Morgan had stopped his scratching in favor of shaking Jake’s hand--- whined at him.

[Jacob Lawrence]

"I was hoping for that. He's... stubborn." He, too, laughed, though it was in a much more awkward fashion, his nerves refusing to let him relax. "It takes a lot of training, but it looks like Jordan's got it down." Jake was at a loss for what to say. Superficial conversation was fine, or it would have been, if all the panicking inside his head would settle down.

But then Morgan had to put him in another awkward position. For a hesitating moment, Jake just looked at the outstretched hand, brain scrambling through his former aliases to find a name. When he finally settled on one, he shook Morgan's hand in what he hoped was a friendly manner. His fingers were trembling, but he hoped that Morgan wouldn't notice. "Nice to... meet you, Morgan. I'm Nick."

Beta's whine earned him another moment of frantically searching for a name that Morgan wouldn't recognize. "That big baby is... Ox." Well, Jake had often called Beta that affectionately, and he responded to it, so he figured it would work well enough. "The stubborn one here is Gabe." He was thankful, at least, that he'd gotten the Leonberger after the incident with Morgan.

[Morgan Tonaya]

“Which is actually rather strange, since he was a rescue.” Morgan mused. “The rescuers thought maybe he had started training before they found him.” He shrugged. “But who knows. It was a perfect match though.” He patted the dog’s head affectionately. Morgan had never seen the pup, but he seemed to always know exactly where he was and what he was feeling. That pet-owner bond had set in fast during a time when Morgan felt like Jordan was his only friend.

Shaking Nick/Jake’s hand, Morgan smiled. “Good to meet you. Are you knew to the area?” he asked, falling easily into chit-chat. “Ox and…Gabe? Those are good names.” Morgan said, nodding slowly. “What are they?”

That was a weirdly worded question, but it wasn’t as if he could look and see the breeds of the two dogs. Or even really gauge their size all that well.

[Jacob Lawrence]

"I hope he was okay when they found him?" Jake shuddered to think of Omega wounded or sick when he was rescued. It would have been another notch in the belt of horrible things he'd been a part of. "He's certainly cute." Beta nosed Jordan and bayed, his tail and entire rear end wagging with excitement for seeing two old friends.

Jake pursed his lips at the question. "Relatively new." He supposed he could let it slide with that. It wasn't like Morgan was asking for details. "Ox is a Basset Hound, Gabe is a Leonberger." He nudged the younger dog. "Why don't you go say hello, big fella?"

Gabe snorted, but finally stood and walked over to Morgan, sniffing his hand then sitting in front of him expectantly, as if waiting for the blonde man to say hello to him as well. He looked Morgan over, running his fingers through his hair, silently praising Morgan's obliviousness. If only they could have started over like this, without Jake's past looming over them like a dark shadow.

[Morgan Tonaya]

“I’m not sure on his back story, actually.” Morgan said thoughtfully, scratching the back of his neck. “The rescue said that he must have had a good life before they got him, but they’re not really sure where he came from.” He scratched Jordan on his rump and smiled. “But I don’t really care. He’s my boy now, and we do good.”

When Beta bayed, Morgan laughed shaking his head. “Yeah, sounds like a basset hound.” He joked, slowly kneeling with his hand out in front of him. He couldn’t see where the dog was, but figured getting down to the level would be good enough.

Of course it was a horrible idea, being that as soon as he was low enough, Jordan tried to jump into his lap. Morgan chuckled. “Down, Jor.” He instructed. He felt the cold wetness of the dog’s nose, and the huff of air as he sat. Morgan reached out and gently patted his head. “Hey there, Gabe. Not so bad, huh?” he said quietly.

“I’ve never seen a Leonberger before.” Morgan commented easily. “What does he look like?”

[Jacob Lawrence]

Beta, with his ever-burning desire to be the center of attention, licked Morgan's hand as he reached it out and even attempted to join Jordan in invading the man's lap. Jake whistled to get the hound's attention while Morgan dealt with his own dog, Beta backing off but still wiggling as if his life depended on it. "You're just popular, aren't you?" He joked, even going so far as to laugh just a little.

"Not a very common breed, I've noticed. They're big, think almost like a mastiff, but furrier. Much furrier." Gabe's ears dropped a little when Morgan's hand touched his head, but he tolerated it for a while before leaning back. He pushed his nose into his palm and sniffed, his tail giving one small thump. "I think he might just have approved of you." There was surprise evident in his voice. So that was where the similarities ended, he figured.

Biting on his bottom lip, Jake surveyed Morgan once again. It had been a long time since he'd last seen the teacher and he had spent many long days thinking of the last look Morgan had ever fixed him with. The hurt in his eyes from Jake's betrayal had been horrible to bear, but at least now he could try to remember Morgan with a smile.

"Can I... can I ask you something?"

[Morgan Tonaya]

“I guess!” Morgan agreed, wobbling slightly in his crouching position as the excited dogs jostled him around. Normally Morgan would have run his hands over the dog as Jake was describing him, but Gabe didn’t seem to keen on that. Instead the blond man chuckled as the dog’s wet nose pushed into his hand.

“Well that’s a relief. If dogs don’t like you well then…that’s never a good sign.” He said, standing up and rubbing his hands over the legs of his jeans. Morgan tilted his head, only slightly weirded out by his new acquaintances trepidation.

“Sure, what’s up?”

[Jacob Lawrence]

Jake nodded in agreement, but it took him a moment to realize that Morgan couldn't see it. That was definitely taking some getting-used-to. "Definitely. Dogs are the best judge of character." And he did trust their judgement very much. If they didn't like someone, then it was game over. "Although I don't think they've ever met someone they didn't like." He looked down at the pair of them, then made a face when he thought of how that could have been interpreted. "Uh... not saying that you aren't special or anything."

Ugh. Curse his inability to think before speaking when it came to Morgan. And yet his mouth just kept moving, wanting to fill the silence, wanting the conversation to continue, but when everything caught up to him, he back-pedaled. Now it was really awkward.

"I... uhh... was wondering if... uhh..." Real smooth, Jake. "Wi--Have you always been blind?" What he really wanted to ask was if Morgan was okay. He wanted so desperately to know how he had been coping since he'd last seen him, wanted to know if Morgan hated him or resented him for lying, wanted to know if he'd moved on. But he couldn't ask that.

[Morgan Tonaya]

It really was really awkward. Morgan was always vaguely sensitive to social climate with new people (hardly ever when it came to certain things, but that’s another story), but being blind he’d learned to pick up on certain things. This was weird. Jake was making him feel on edge. Morgan stood and shifted awkwardly from one foot to another.

When Jake finally spat it out, a grin broke Morgan’s face. Lots of people asked him that, and it wasn’t too hard to talk about anymore. “Not always. I lost my sight in an accident.” He explained, leaving it as vague as it needed to be. “But Jordan’s helped me a whole lot.” He scratched the dog behind the ears. “And doctors. Now I’m pretty much adjusted.” Morgan said without shame or any real hint of awkwardness.

There was no use walking on eggshells when it came to his blindness. Now it was part of his life, and it would have to stay that way.

[Jacob Lawrence]

Jake's face fell into his palm, somewhat glad that he could do that without Morgan seeing. He'd just made himself sound like a moron, he was sure of it, and his head was really starting to hurt from all the jumbled up thoughts rolling around inside of it. He pinched the bridge of his nose, this time trying to actually hold back something stupid that he might have said.

Morgan's smile was reassuring and endearing all at once, though Jake had often found everything about Morgan to be endearing. And that was dangerous, because Jake found himself wanting nothing more than to just hug Morgan. Pull him into his arms and apologize for everything, tell him that he still loved him just as much as before. More than anything else, Jake just wanted Morgan back in his life. He'd never been happier than when he was with Morgan and it might have been selfish, but he wanted that back.

"That's good." He said with a heavy breath, reaching out to give Jordan another little scratch behind the ears. "You keep taking care of Morgan, alright." Smiling at the dog, he tightened up Gabe's lead and hooked Beta's back to his collar. "But I should be going." He needed to get away from this situation before he ruined it. "It was good seeing you again, Morgan." There was a tinge of sadness in his voice, knowing there was a very good possibility he might never have the chance to see him or talk to him again, and this would be all he'd have to look back on.

For a moment he froze, inwardly cursing himself for the slip-up. He could only hope that Morgan didn't catch it, and he gave the dogs a gentle tug and hurried them away.

[Morgan Tonaya]

Morgan was starting to feel slightly uncomfortable. This guy was talking strangely, In a nostalgic way that old friends talked…not new acquaintances. He just figured maybe he had a friend or family member with a disability? Or he somehow otherwise identified with Morgan’s situation? It was sweet, right? Like a good Samaritan?

”It was good seeing you again, Morgan”

Morgan froze where he was standing, gripping Jordan’s harness tightly. “What did you say?” He choked, suddenly frightened. He heard the footsteps retreating quickly and stood up, holding himself stock still to try and gain bearings. But he was gone…

…whoever he was.

[CLOSED o: ]