This Can't Be Happening (Kouji)

[Takchawee Ominotago]

Tak stirred sleepily, blinking slowly into awakeness as she yawned sleepily. Almost immediately, she was hit with a feeling of nausea in her stomach, and she groaned, propping herself up on her elbows and glancing over at the clock. 1:00 pm? Really!? It was a weekend, but she nearly never slept in that late. Tak frowned. Normally she wouldn't think too much of it, but....

She sat up in bed, letting out another moan as he stomach twinged. Something was off, and as she walked over to the bathroom, she was hoping maybe it meant the past few days had just been off.

She had been a few days late. Which had NEVER happened before.

A while back, she had also missed a few days of taking her pill. Maybe she was overreacting, but one couldn't be too sure.

But as she reached the bathroom to take a shower, she realized that things were still off. That meant.... Four days. That, plus the nausea, the tiredness, the headache that was beginning to bloom...

Oh, God.

She let out a pained gasp, recoiling at the possibility. No, that couldn't happen. She couldn't... No. Years had passed with nothing happening, and it wasn't about to change now. But as she continued to pace around the bathroom, she couldn't help but panic. Someone knocked at the door, and she huffed, tugging it open and storming past without even looking at who it was. She had to go talk to Kouji.

Tak hardly even took the time to throw on a shirt before she was racing down the hall, making a beeline for his room. She made it there a few moments later and, without knocking, opened his door. She didn't care what he was doing, she had to talk to him. Now.

As soon as she caught sight of him, she opened her mouth to blurt out something, but nothing came out. Instead, she burst into tears. Overly emotional? Check that off the list, too.

[Kouji Yajima]

Kouji had just gotten out of the shower, getting ready to go out for the afternoon with a few of the members on the soccer team. He tugged on a shirt and stepped in front of the mirror in his dorm to style his hair. He rarely went out without putting some sort of product in it, because he always thought it looked strange just falling flat down.

He reached for his hair gel, glancing at the TV, which was showing one of his favorite dramas in the background. A repeat. But that didn’t stop him from talking to the television. “Come on, Takahashi-chan… don’t listen to him.” He muttered, running a handful of gel through his hair.

Quickly, he styled his hair, giving it a messy, yet nice bed head look. There, he was done and ready to head out and meet up with his teammates. He turned off his television and as he grabbed his wallet and phone, Tak busted into his room. “Oi! You just scared the living—“ Kouji cut himself off, noticing something wasn’t right, and just as he was about to ask, Tak burst into tears.

Immediately, he ran up to her, pulling her into a tight embrace. “What’s wrong?” He inquired, kissing the top of her head and rubbing her back. Tak rarely cried, so Kouji knew something must have been terribly wrong. “It’ll be okay, I promise.”

[Takchawee Ominotago]

Tak couldn't remember the last time she had cried. It wasn't something she usually did, simply because she saw no point. She would rather take action that spend time feeling sorry for herself. But this was different. Totally unexpected. And as Kouji ran over to her and pulled her close, she hiccuped and tried to control the tears. She managed to hold them back, but still let out the occasional sniffle.

"No no, it's not going to be okay," she said in a hoarse whisper, clinging to Kouji desperately, as though all her problems could go away if she just held him tightly enough. It took a while before she could muster the strength to tell him what the problem was.

"I woke up really late today, and I felt sick and my head hurts. And normally I wouldn't really think anything of it but... But...." She let out another small sob. "I'm... I'm late, Kouji. And that's never happened before." Hopefully he could put the pieces together and understand what she was talking about. "I... I think I skipped my pill a couple days a while back and... And..." She buried her head into his chest, unable to say anything else.

[Kouji Yajima]

Tak crying was almost enough to make Kouji cry himself. It was just so heartbreaking. Although her tears slowed down, it was clear that she was making a very strong effort to keep herself from crying even more. He raised his eyebrows as she informed him that it was not okay. His first thought was that someone had died, but he kept quiet, letting Tak explain at her own pace as he squeezed her tightly, hoping that somehow he could help her.

It took him a few moments to put the pieces together. He wasn’t the brightest bulb, after all, but when it did finally click, his eyes widened. “A-are you sure?” he questioned, unsure how to react. If what she was implying was true, then Tak was right, it wasn’t going to be okay. He waited a few moments, trying to choose the right words in his mind, “It could just be normal, you know? Did you take a test?” He tried to imagine Tak pregnant, and it just wasn't working, especially when he had to picture who the fath-- Oh shit. "Do you know who?"

[Takchawee Ominotago]

Kouji's first reaction was silence, and Tak wasn't sure if it was because he was shocked, angry, or just didn't understand. Apparently it was the latter, because when he did finally talk, he just asked her a question, stammering. She shook her head, feeling just a very small bit of relief. It was true, maybe it was just normal, but... It just didn't feel right. "N-no, I haven't yet. I didn't think to." She sniffled again and pulled her head back, looking up at him. "I th-think I should, though. I have to know." Because if she just avoided it, there was no way for her to know whether she should really.... Plan for this to happen.

His later question had her grimacing. Did she know who? Of course not, there were at least four guys she had had relations with around the time that she had skipped a few days, and while some of them had used condoms, it wasn't a guarantee. She felt a little ashamed as she slowly shook her head. ".... No. It could be... A couple people." She wasn't about to list names; Kouji would know. She had never felt bad about having so many partners, but not that that might be coming back to kick her in the ass.... She was mortified. "I should... Go get a test, I think," she murmured shakily, unclenching her fists from his shirt and pulling back slightly. She didn't feel like she deserved his embrace at the moment.

[Kouji Yajima]

He had never seen Tak so shaken before, but she certainly had a good reason to be. After all, this was life changing if she was truly pregnant. But… girls were late all the time, right? Uh… Kouji had no idea about the female…system… thing. He wasn’t very helpful when it came to that stuff, but he would definitely be there for Tak no matter what the results were, he decided. “Good idea. So don’t worry just yet.” He brought a hand up to her chin and gave her the best smile he could muster in such a situation.

It didn’t surprise Kouji that she wasn’t sure who the father would be, but that didn’t stop it from bothering him slightly. Regardless, he pushed his emotions aside. He had to be there for Tak. “Well, we’ll worry about that after we get you a test, okay?” He said softly, taking her hand. Although she had stepped away, he still reached to physically comfort her. It was Tak, after all. “I’ll go with you,” He said after a moment, “Uh, if you want, that is.” He knew it was something very personal, but he wanted to be there for moral support.

[Takchawee Ominotago]

Tak wished she could give him a smile in return, but she just... Couldn't. Wasn't she always smirking or grinning? God, this was horrible. He said not to worry, but Tak couldn't help it. Her life could be changing as they spoke.

She nodded, looking down at their hands as they entwined together. He was always there for her, she thought. Even with this, he was staying calm and in control. If only she knew how much this was really bothering him. "Okay," she agreed softly. At his offer, she looked up, uncertainty showing in her eyes. "Would you? Really?" The thought of Kouji going with her made the trip to the store seem a little more bearable. "Of course I want you too. I.... I don't want to be alone," she whispered. "I just didn't want to make you feel like you had to." At his confirmation, she took a deep breath and turned towards his door. "Might as well go ahead and get it over with," she murmured. She pressed a hand against her stomach, still feeling nauseous. Probably even more so now that she was on the edge of having a mental breakdown.

[Kouji Yajima]

“I know I don’t have to.” Kouji nodded, “But I want to be there for you.” He certainly didn’t want Tak to have to be alone during all of this, and the idea of it pulled at Kouji’s heart. “Alright, let’s go.” He didn’t even bother trying to contact anyone from the soccer team to let them know he wasn’t going to make it; he’d deal with that later. Right now, Tak needed him and that was all that mattered.

The walk to the store didn’t take too long, and Kouji tried his best to keep Tak calm, but he couldn’t blame her for being close to completely freaking out. If Kouji were in her shoes, he was sure he’d have a mental breakdown, not that boys could get pregnant, but that wasn’t the point. He lead her to the isle labeled “Family Planning” and looked at all the different tests. Wow. There were a lot. Was one better than the other? He grabbed one and flipped it around, skimming the back. Nothing it said made any sense to him. “Uh… Which one do you want?” He didn't even know that there were different options for these things.

[Takchawee Ominotago]

The walk to the store was quite horrible, in Tak's opinion, and she was probably clinging to Kouji's hand for dear life a little harder than needed. But eventually they got there, and she followed him in a daze over to the right aisle. At first she just looked blankly at all the boxes. How the hell was she supposed to know? She had never planned this to happen. "Uuum. I... I don't have a lot of money, so... Maybe one of the cheaper ones?" Maybe not the best idea, but it was what she could afford. She hesitantly reached out to pick one of them, lifting it as though it was a poisonous insect. She wanted nothing to do with it. "I guess.... This'll do?" Still clinging to his hand, she read the instructions, but they were all sort of a blur in her mindset. Whatever, it was supposed to do the job, right?

They walked up and paid for the test, and soon were on the way back to Hammel. Tak's breaths were getting short by the time they made it back, and she took the walk back to her room slowly, not wanting to do this. "I'm so scared," she breathed as they reached her door. She leaned her head into Kouji's arm, squinting her eyes closed. Thank God he was there with her.

[Kouji Yajima]

Kouji figured that a test was a test, and if it was cheap or not, it’d still do it’s purpose, so he nodded when she chose one. Noticing how she was holding it, he took it from her hand and brought it to the counter, and even paid for it. He knew she didn’t want to deal with the situation, so at least he could carry the thing for her. Also, he was pretty sure she’d break the damn test by the time they got back to the school if she held it anywhere near as tightly as she was holding his hand.

As they neared Tak’s dorm, Kouji started to feel more and more anxious himself. What if it was positive? Kouji was determined to stay by her side… but the entire situation made him feel uneasy. He sucked in a breath quietly, trying his best to keep calm for Tak. “I know you are, but… this has to be done, okay?” They reached her dorm, and he opened the door, leading her inside.

[Takchawee Ominotago]

Tak hated that Kouji paid for the damn thing, but she was too upset to argue much. She would figure out something to do later. She thanked him quietly before they left.

She pressed her lips together, nodding against his shoulder before letting out a quick, hard breath and pulling back. "Okay." She took the test from him and, feeling like she was stepping into deep, shark-infested waters, followed him inside. "Um, I don't think it'll take too long..." she said, rereading the instructions. "I'll... Be right back." She slowly let go of his hand and went to the bathroom, hands shaking.

When she got inside, she let out another sob, before ripping open the package and fumbling with the device. She blindly did as she thought she had read, thinking it was simple enough to do. It took a while, but eventually she held the innocent-looking white contraption in her hand, her heart pounding madly.

She figured Kouji should be around for this part, so she went back into the common room, eyes riveted on the window. A line showed in one window, but there was another one that looked blank. What did that mean again? She couldn't remember. Maybe Kouji would know. (Why would he know? He's a boy. But she wasn't really thinking straight.) "Um. What does a line mean?" she asked slowly as she looked up at him.

[Kouji Yajima]

That awkward moment when you’re waiting outside the bathroom door of your best friend (and love interest) waiting for her to take a pregnancy test. Kouji paced around to keep himself busy. He felt like he needed to move, or at least do something other than just wait. It felt like forever that Tak was in the bathroom, but eventually she came out, looking more shaken than ever.

He looked at it and scratched his head, obviously confused. He had no idea how to read these things. “Uhm… I’m not sure. Where are the directions?” He asked, bringing his gaze back up to Tak. Maybe he wasn’t the best person for moral support because he didn’t know a damn thing about pregnancy tests. He felt his heart start to beat quicker. Here was the answer, right in front of them, yet neither of them even knew what it meant. This was getting insane. “Here, I’ll get them.” He walked over to the bathroom and grabbed the box, reading it while he walked back to Tak.

“…I think it means you’re positive.”

[Takchawee Ominotago]

Tak watched as Kouji went to get the box, her hands visibly jittering. It was a miracle she hadn't dropped the thing yet. When he came back, reading the instructions, Tak automatically stood closer to him, feeling a little faint. The nauseous feeling in her stomach was worse than ever; she almost felt like she might throw up.

A moment of silence. Then. I think it means you're positive.

The world around Tak went completely silent, and she just stared at that innocent-looking line on the harmless device in her hands. It couldn't be. No. She couldn't.... This couldn't be happening.

She was silent for several long moments as she tried to process the information. Then, she let out a pained gasp and dropped the test, wrapping her arms around herself as the fact of this life-altering information finally settled in. "Oh God!" she cried, unable to even cry anymore. This wasn't possible. After all this time, she had felt immune to this sort of problem; it had never even been taken into consideration. But here it was, staring her straight in the face.

"I can't do this, Kouji," she stammered, tugging her hands through her hair and slumping against a nearby wall. "I can't.... I can't be a mom!" She pressed her arms against her stomach once more; the nauseous feeling was gone, replaced by an overwhelming feeling of dread and horror. Who was it that had even gotten her pregnant? That was the worst part - somewhere amid her panic, she knew this was her fault. She was finally facing the consequences for her actions. "I... This..." She couldn't even speak comprehensibly now. She looked up at Kouji, searching desperately for an answer. There had to be something, anything....

[Kouji Yajima]

In those few moments of silence, millions of thoughts were running through Kouji’s head. Who was the father? Whoever it was, were they going to take responsibility? Was Tak even going to keep the child? It seemed like the world was spinning way too fast. Although Kouji virtually had nothing to do with this child, he still felt like he needed to do something, anything, to help.

Before his mind could completely catch up, Tak let out a cry, and Kouji was brought back to the moment. He immediately dropped the box and brought a hand up to rub her cheek softly with his thumb. What was he supposed to say? This was life changing, and he was useless to help.

“Shhh…” He said softly, his eyes glancing down to Tak’s stomach. To think that there was little bit of life in there… it was hard to believe. He brought his free hand up, placing it softly over Tak’s hands on her stomach. “I… I’ll do anything you need. You’re not in this alone.” He said quickly, watching her carefully. Yes, there were many unanswered questions, and he wasn’t exactly sure what he’d do to stay by her side, but he refused to abandon her. The thought of her being alone through this was heartbreaking, and he didn’t trust any of the men who she had been with to step up to the plate and deal with it. He leaned forward, kissing her forehead softly.

[Takchawee Ominotago]

When Kouji brushed her cheek with his hand, Tak gave a dry sob, clinging to it like a lifeline. She wasn't capable of doing this on her own. She didn't have money or resources to take care of a kid, not to mention she was just not ready or mature enough to be able to take care of another life. The idea of abortion made her sick; even in her panic and horror, it wasn't something she could consider. Adoption was an option, but there was still the many months to come... Oh God. The stares and snickers she would get. She had never cared before, but now that she was going to suffer for what she had done, she couldn't imagine how much people would laugh that she had finally got what was coming to her.

Her eyes dropped down as Kouji put his hand over her own, and she wondered what he was thinking. Was he ashamed of her? Would he stop being her friend out of disgust? She couldn't lose him. If she could have anyone stay by her side, it was him. She looked up at him with wide, scared eyes when he told her she wasn't in this alone. "I'm so scared," she whispered. She trusted him, so much, but would he really keep his word when she started showing and the rumors started springing up? People might think he was the one that got her pregnant, and she wasn't sure how, if he could, handle that sort of attention. "You.... You shouldn't have to do that," she murmured, squeezing her eyes shut against the flood of tears threatening to break through again. "This is all my fault. I don't.... I don't want people to talk about you because of it. You didn't do anything." How was she going to tell all of her... Relations? Should she do some sort of testing to see who it was? Did it really matter? Her life was going to be ruined in nine months anyway.