TIMEWARP: Nothing is Sacred, and Everything Hurts

[Robbie Wilkes]

Robbie wasn't even aware of how close Tanner was getting to him until the other blonde ran his fingers through Robbie's hair. The weather manipulator closed his eyes against the touch, leaning into it and sighing softly at how good it felt.

He opened his eyes as Tanner spoke. His words were comforting and after the day he had had, comforting was everything he needed right then.

"I know." He whispered, realising that Tanner was obviously right. It had been because he had repressed all his emotions when he had his breakdowns those years ago. First with his very first breakup and the second because of his family leaving.

"I know," he repeated, louder this time as he raised his eyes to meet Tanner's. He gave the other blonde a small smile before turning to start walking, expecting the other one to follow him.

"Honestly, I'm not really good at this talking thing. Never have been." He started after having walked a few minutes. "Well, I'm good at talking, just not about...my feelings I guess?" He rubbed his forehead as he walked in stride with Tanner. "I shouldn't have opened up that can of worms though. I know you said I didn't need to worry about you but it's like...after four years of not talking to you, I suddenly start blabbering about my break up. It's not fair to you. That's all I'm saying."

[Tanner Larson]

Tanner noticed Robbie's content reaction to his touch, but he ignored it for now: he didn't want to start wondering what it meant, for that would lead him down a path he wasn't sure he felt comfortable going down. He decided that the boy had just had a long day, and his touch was relaxing. That was enough of a reason for him. But noticing this made Tanner suddenly much more aware of their proximity, so he moved his hand away, bringing it back down to his side.

When Robbie turned from him and began walking, the blonde pyro took that as his cue to follow. The other boy's stride was slightly longer, but he kept up as they were walking fairly slowly. Tanner understood what Robbie meant when he said he wasn't good at talking, but he nodded at the other's elaboration. "So I've discovered," he replied with a hint of a smile. He had certainly experienced Robbie's inability to express his feelings, particularly on the day they had been studying in his room and Robbie had essentially kicked him out. Perhaps if Robbie had been able to talk about what he was going through, everything could have turned out differently.

This revelation made Tanner shiver despite his abnormally high internal temperature.

"Hey, you can't help how you feel," he offered with a shrug, as Robbie said he shouldn't have brought up his breakup the moment they'd met. "I mean, I did ask." Tanner felt somewhat guilty, as it had sort of been the answer he'd been looking for, albeit far less recently. Well, he supposed he was getting what he deserved now, having to play the comforting friend. "I mean, we could talk about anything you want to talk about," he clarified, "but I think in the long run, it would be more helpful if, you know..." he paused for a moment, unsure of how to articulate what he was trying to say, "...you got anything off your chest." Wasn't it better that way? For everything to be out in the open? "Besides, I'm a big boy," he added, the reference to the song he'd sung so long ago going over his head, "I can take anything you give me." If Robbie was feeling down, then he was determined to help, even if it meant having to lift some of his emotional load.

[Robbie Wilkes]

Robbie was fully aware of his surroundings and he was pretty sure Tanner's touch was more comforting than anything but Robbie needed it more than he thought. And when Tanner moved his hand, the taller blonde's face fell just slightly. He didn't know what that meant, him being upset of the loss of contact but that was just what he was. Upset.

But he was unaware of what Tanner was thinking. Robbie still never could read people properly. If he could though, he probably would have told Tanner that the day he had basically chased Tanner out of his room was a mistake on his part. He knew for certain that he had been attracted to Tanner. How could he not be? Tanner was smart and good-looking, two very good qualities Robbie liked. Dani had both of that. And more.

Tanner's offer to listen was appreciated but Robbie didn't know what to say anymore. What could he say without sounding like a pathetic asshole? Besides, he had told Tanner why he and Dani broke up. He couldn't explain it any better because he didn't think there was a need. He couldn't understand why he thought he and Dani should break up. He knew there was nothing external that caused it. It wasn't because he was in love with someone else or vice versa.

He just didn't feel like he was putting in any effort into the relationship anymore.

"Truthfully...I don't know what to say to make myself feel any better." Robbie admitted. "It was a mutual agreement. I don't think I could have done anything better to make things work. And that makes me mad. Because like I said, I still love her. I just...didn't want to be with her anymore."

[Tanner Larson]

Tanner knew that Robbie's actions that day so many years ago had been a mistake: he had long since realized that. The pyro was less confident back then, but he knew now that he was a catch. He was smart and good-looking, yes, but he was also talented, creative, loyal, and level-headed. Someone like him could have been good for someone like Robbie. And unlike Dani, Tanner never would have let Robbie go; like he said, he was smart.

Tanner listened as Robbie attempted to explain the situation, but by this time both of them had likely realized that Tanner would just never be able to understand what had happened. They loved each other, and yet they broke up. He loved her, and yet he had stopped putting effort into their relationship. Had he just grown complacent, and it had led to boredom? It seemed like the most likely answer, but even Tanner's analytical mind simply couldn't wrap itself around anything regarding relationships. What few he'd had were quick and, at the end, virtually painless. Perhaps he was just lucky, or perhaps he was just sheltered.

"I'm sorry to hear that," he offered, hands finding their way into his pockets as they two boys continued walking. Tanner looked around, noting all of the buildings lit up with incandescents, the dark night sky hovering just overhead. It reminded him, he realized, of the night they had spent together three years ago, when Robbie had kissed him and everything had seemed just wonderful, even if only for a brief moment. Just like back then, Tanner was at a loss for words. Hadn't he told this boy pretty much everything there needed to be said? Besides, if he was down, then Tanner didn't want to brag about how well things were going for him. "Well, I guess it's good that you came to the decision together," he thought aloud with another shrug. "You know, instead of..." He laughed, almost bitterly. "I'm sorry I suck," he apologized with a bit of a smile. "I can't say I've ever been in your shoes." He thought for a moment before turning his head towards Robbie, both boys still walking side by side. "Did you want to go anywhere?" He asked suddenly. "Or just walk?" He didn't care either way, but he had felt the desire to ask.

[Robbie Wilkes]

He knew he wasn't making any sense. Truth be told, Robbie was starting to doubt that he could ever hold a committed relationship long enough for it to mean something. He supposed that was his lot in life.

The taller blonde kept his gaze down to his tattered Chucks in silence. He wanted Tanner to say something - anything - so Robbie didn't feel like this was a one-sided conversation. But when he did, Robbie felt even more helpless.

"Nobody's ever been in my shoes. Because no one is that stupid." He forced a bark of laughter to escape before he looked up at Tanner's question. "I don't know, actually. I feel like I should go back home. Go to sleep. Just...but I don't trust myself when I'm alone."

[Tanner Larson]

Tanner wasn't sure he believed in people having "lots in life." Sure, at times he felt a bit fatalistic, but if working at the House had shown him anything, it was that you could completely turn your life around if you worked at it. That was what Cynthia had done, and it was what he had done. If Robbie didn't think he could ever be in a long-term relationship, then perhaps he was just doing so with the wrong person.

Then again, Tanner couldn't exactly speak from experience.

"Hey now," he said almost immediately after Robbie insulted himself. He didn't like to hear that: Robbie was a bright kid - in most areas - and he knew he was just ragging on himself because he was upset. More upset than Tanner had initially assumed, and this was becoming more and more evident as their conversation continued. "You did the best you could." Scant comfort, he knew. But that was really all he could offer, because he really didn't understand the circumstances of their breakup enough to give wiser words.

At Robbie's next statement, though, Tanner frowned quite deeply, stopping in his tracks for just a moment before resuming his pace. What did that mean, he didn't trust himself? Wasn't that like... what suicidal people said? Tanner wouldn't believe that Robbie was like that, so surely he had just misunderstood. Still, it was a dark thing to say, and the blonde didn't like hearing the other sounding so messed up. When he spoke, his voice was low, hopefully sympathetic, but earnest. "What's... going on, Robbie?" He asked, brows furrowed just a little. He didn't want to sound too suspicious, but he was starting to really worry.

[Robbie Wilkes]

Tanner's response made Robbie smile. It wasn't genuine, but a lot of what he was feeling right now were deterring him from being genuine. Well, he was genuinely depressed, that's for sure.

He noticed Tanner pausing but it was so brief that Robbie didn't think much of it. "I don't know, man. I just lost my girlfriend to my own stupidity. I'd probably empty a tub of ice cream, watch TV in my briefs and drunk dial some ex I don't even like anymore." He rubbed his face with both hands and sighed loudly.

"I forgot how annoying breaking up with someone is." Of course, the first time he broke up with the person he thought he was in love with, it had been six years ago. The breakups after that have been his own doing. And those didn't matter as much as breaking up with Dani.

Then why did he do it? Yes. It really was because he was stupid. He would rather chop off his arm now than wait for it to potentially get hurt. Yes. He will always be the douche. He might think he was evolved from the jackass he was when he was still in Hammel but that was such a lie.

"Let's not talk about me for the rest of the evening. How are you? And...who was the unlucky person that song was written for?" He straightened himself up and forced a grin on his face.

[Tanner Larson]

His own stupidity? Robbie was getting more and more enigmatic, but Tanner had by now resigned himself to obliviousness, so he wouldn't question it any further. Besides, what he'd wanted to hear was that he and Dani were no longer an item, and he'd heard it, so it wasn't fair to pry any more than he already had. He couldn't help but laugh, though, as Robbie described the night that lay ahead of him if he went home alone. "Not the worst of all fates," he replied simply, realizing that he had, in fact, overreacted in his initial analysis of Robbie's troubling words. Besides, if breaking up with someone was more "annoying" than anything else, then he had a feeling Robbie would be just fine.

Tanner shrugged; though he was more personable than he used to be, he still didn't particularly care for talking about himself. However, given the fact that all things Robbie were currently in shambles, it was probably best to steer the conversation in another direction for the time being. "Everything's going well," he said lightly, trying to tone down the fact that things were actually going quite swimmingly for him. He had a great job, made quite a bit of money doing it, had a nice apartment all to himself... what wasn't to like? He smiled at the second question, unaware that Robbie's grin was entirely fictitious. "It isn't about anyone," he replied, though he knew most people wouldn't believe that. "The lives of the people I write about in my songs are... far more interesting than my own." He wrote a lot of music, but it was rarely about himself. Whether this was because he was never inspired by his own life, or he just didn't like delving that deeply into himself, he still wasn't sure. He had attempted to write songs about Robbie, but it had just never turned into anything. "Don't worry, I haven't become a vindictive bitch since you last saw me," he added with another, wider smile. "Did you like it?" He asked hopefully; it wasn't the first time he'd performed it, and it wouldn't be the first time someone expressed approval, but hearing it from Robbie would be nice, if it were the case that he did.

[Robbie Wilkes]

Hearing that things were good for Tanner made Robbie relax, even for just a little bit. He was glad they were. Robbie truly believed that Tanner deserved all the good things the other blonde received.

"That's good. I'm glad." He responded before giving a small, but genuine, smile at Tanner's reply about the song. "It's catchy." Robbie admitted, recalling the song with a smile. "And you could never be vindictive. You're too good for that." He bumped Tanner lightly as he slipped his hands further into his pockets.

"Do you have plans of taking your singing anywhere else?" He asked, just wanting to keep up the idle chit-chat.

[Tanner Larson]

Tanner smiled brightly as Robbie told him the song was catchy. It definitely was, and he took it as a compliment. It wasn't easy to write songs that stuck in people's heads, but he was pretty sure he'd aced it this time. Cynthia thought so too, since this wasn't the first time he'd performed it at the House, though he didn't do so too often. Had to keep things fresh and all that.

He giggled as Robbie jabbed him. For just a split second, it was like old times, the two boys playfully poking each other and just making random conversation. But it was clear that things had changed a lot. For Tanner, it was mostly positive. For Robbie, there was still a lot of positive change, like his schooling and new career trajectory, but the breakup was clearly weighing heavily on him still, as it likely would for quite some time. "You've never gotten on my bad side," he replied teasingly, grin spreading further across his features.

He blushed, though, as Robbie asked him if he'd considered taking his act on the road. If he was asking, then he must have thought it was pretty good, and that made him feel a bit self-conscious. Truthfully, he and Cynthia had discussed this, but Tanner had decided he just wasn't ready: he didn't have enough original material and wasn't sure where he would get enough funding to make all of that happen. Cynthia would help, obviously, for a price, but the whole thing was just a complicated process on which he wasn't ready to embark. Maybe someday. But he demurred for now, not wanting to delve into all of that. "I guess I haven't really thought about it," he replied, blatantly lying to the other male. "Do you think I should?"

[Robbie Wilkes]

"And I think it's best for me to keep it that way," Robbie grinned, turning a little to smile in Tanner's way. He wasn't feeling better in the slightest but it was better for him to keep himself occupied with something light than going back to his empty apartment and wallowing in self-pity.

"I dunno, you've got the talent." He admitted with a shrug. "I don't know what goes on behind the whole thing and the procedures and all but I guess if you don't try then you'll never know, right?"

Robbie turned a little and bit his inner cheek before asking. "I'm not pulling you away from anything, am I?"

[Tanner Larson]

Tanner, completely oblivious to the fact that Robbie wasn't feeling even remotely better, gave another chuckle. "Evidently," he agreed, not that the song had been about someone he knew, but figuring he apparently had the ability to write a song like that if he needed to. He wouldn't about Robbie, though: they were friends, and while he had been bitter and jaded about things for a while, he wasn't the type of guy to sing about something private like that publicly.

"Well, thanks," he replied, figuring there was no use in disagreeing out of modesty when it was clear by now that he wasn't just an average singer. "I guess that's true," he agreed, pondering that a bit more. He wasn't sure he was the type of person to reach for celebrity, though, which was surely a trait shared by most people who went around performing. He was more outgoing than he had been back at Hammel, sure, but not remotely to that extent. He likely never would be.

When asked if there was somewhere else Tanner needed to be, the boy shook his head quickly. "No, no, not at all," he replied. In truth, he was supposed to sing another song, though not for at least another twenty minutes. Even if the time came and went, though, he would still rather spend it with Robbie; Cynthia could always just fill the slot with someone else. And then, you know, yell at him later. But that was fine. "So did you have, like, class today or...?" He did want to steer the direction back away from himself, as possible, but not back towards the breakup. Surely he could help Robbie focus on something that made him happier?

[Robbie Wilkes]

Robbie chuckled at Tanner's response and took his hand out to ruffle his own hair a little.

"But hey, it's your music. You should be able to do what you want with it without other people telling you." He laughed quietly, not meaning to sound pushy at all.

The speed in which Tanner responded made Robbie smile a little. At least someone was willing to spend time with him, even if it's hella depressing right now to be around him.

He looked to Tanner at his question, suddenly aware that they were still offering each other idle chit-chat, which Robbie was grateful for. "I don't have classes on Thursdays. Or Fridays. Which is a good thing...in some aspects but then you get classes on Sunday and that just bums the crap out of me." He shook his head in amusement.

Looking up, he saw a hot dog cart and for once in his entire life, he didn't even jump at the chance to get some. It really was a weird sensation, not wanting to eat. Cliched, too.

He slid his hand around Tanner's arm and steered him around so they were walking further away from the cart. Without letting Tanner's arm go, he continued to walk. "So are you a permanent resident in PR now?"

[Tanner Larson]

Tanner shrugged; he supposed that was true enough, but he couldn't just up and leave Cynthia and the House after all she had done for him. That was just bad karma, but it would also be like a slap in the face after the rather heavy investment - personal and financial - that Cynthia had made in him. She certainly didn't let any of her other performers sing their own music and direct their own sets.

In fact, Cynthia was actually very interested in seeing how far Tanner could go. She had been pushing him for a while now to make a demo album to shop around, but he just wasn't sure about that. Perhaps it was the introvert in him, but the idea of strangers listening to his voice whenever they wanted just freaked him out a little. Besides, who would want to put him on the radio?

"Yikes," he said at the prospect of having classes on Sundays. "Well, I guess Sunday is kinda a throwaway day anyway. I mean, most people just spend it lying around wishing it was still Saturday," he added with a laugh. He had attended a two-year program at the local community college, as he hadn't wanted his mind to rot, but as long as he was in Pilot Ridge he was going to be singularly focused on his current career path. The way he saw it, there was always time to apply to a 'real' college later on if things didn't work out.

The pyro, too, saw the hot dog cart, and he was just about to offer Robbie one when he felt himself being steered away. He didn't put two and two together but decided to forego the offer. He was, of course, acutely aware of the boy's hand on his arm, though he was no longer the type of boy to shy away from such a touch. If color came to his cheeks, it was far less than it would have been the last time they had seen one another.

"For the time being, yeah," he replied with a nod. "I mean, it's kind of the only place I know. Besides, what I'm doing now I couldn't really do anywhere else. At least, not yet." What the future would bring, he couldn't know. "What about you, you sticking around?" Hopefully Robbie wasn't going to consider moving because of the whole Dani thing. "I mean, after school..." It occurred to him that, with any other guy, Tanner would probably take this time to bring their hands together rather than letting the other boy's hand rest in the crook of his elbow. But Robbie had just been through a breakup, and that wouldn't be appropriate, so he made no advance.

[Robbie Wilkes]

"That's the best part though. I could just lie in bed and not have anything pressing to think of other than probably the hangover I gotta nurse from last night." He shrugged with a grin.

The hot dog cart avoided, Robbie realised he was still holding on to Tanner so he slipped his hand out. He was not going to be that guy. He wasn't.

Understanding what Tanner was saying, Robbie couldn't help but agree. He didn't want to be anywhere else because he had considered Pilot Ridge his home. "Yes. Actually." He smiled softly. "I've got people to stick around for." Robbie's thoughts went straight to Dani but it was also accompanied by images of Estelle, Henry, Ellie and...well, Tanner. He was a friend. And right now, Robbie needed friends.

"Besides, U of V is in need of linguistics professors so...who knows, I'll probably fill in my mentors' slots one day." He nodded, a little more determined than how he started the day with.

"Hey...thanks. For not writing me off yet." He stopped in his tracks and waited for Tanner to stop too. He quickly gave the other boy a hasty hug and released him before scratching the back of his neck uncomfortably. "You wanna go and get a beer or something?"