You're All By Yourself But You're Not Alone(Sean)

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It was extremely easy for Oriel to misinterpret what he heard from others, seeing hidden messages in their words and sensing passive aggressiveness in their tone. A person may say "I want to help" and Oriel was inclined to think they're lying if he picked up even the slightest bit of insincerity in their voice. If he thought he was troubling them, that he was just an obligation, that they were just trying to get on his good side, or just telling him what he wanted to hear things could go south really fast. The nicer someone was about it the more suspicious he might be of their intentions. Conversely, Oriel might trust someone easier who made no effort to hide how inconvenienced they were because of the boy. At least then, Oriel knew where he stood and didn't have to be guessing all the time.

There was something to be said about consistency as well. Oriel trusted Dr. Neville. There was no way he could know what the older man thought of him, Oriel was still certain the old man hated him, but at least the man was consistent. Oriel knew what to expect from him. Oriel even liked the man. So….he was safe. Oriel was comfortable with the idea of working with him on these efforts.

Oriel didn't know what to expect from anybody else, especially not with people he'd never met. Even more not with people who were likely to take one look at him and wonder "What's this kid's problem? What's his story? Didn't his parent's know how to raise him right?" and then ask questions that he never wanted to answer. So there was a great deal of fear to go along with that anxiety.

He could feel all of that starting to well up again as he considered Dr. Neville's offer. Oriel didn't want to think about what would change once the doctor deemed him as having made "progress". "I ain't making any promises," he said finally, after a long pause. "For now, I'll just come in and see you." That much he was willing, which was something. And something was better than nothing, right? "I'll deal with the rest when we come to it." That was the closest that Oriel was going to get to agreeing to the doctor's plan of action.

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Sean understood the need for consistency. Many people thrived on the notion of consistency; children required it for their ability to grow and process, the knowledge that they had a fundamental routine to which they could return if they felt overwhelmed. Even people like Josh, who enjoyed a certain amount of spontaneity, appreciated the fact that they could fall back on the consistency in their lives, if they needed, or wanted, to do so.

The psychiatrist was consistent in his personal life, and he strove for that in his professional life as well. Sean wanted the students to trust him; he wanted them to feel able to come to him with their problems and concerns and not worry that their words or needs would fall on deaf ears. He wanted to be a resource, because he wanted to help.

Sometimes, he needed to be a stepping stone, a means of transition. Since Oriel had come to trust him, he wanted the boy to see that it was possible to trust other mental health professionals as well. Not everyone was out to get Oriel; not everyone disliked him or was quick to judge. The psychiatrist could recommend someone who did anger management groups and who would treat the boy with the same patient guidance.

However, this was a matter of baby steps. At least Oriel was willing to see him to address these problems. At least he had taken the proactive steps of coming to Sean’s office to discuss them in the first place. At least the psychiatrist had broken through Oriel’s defense mechanism so that they could have an open dialogue about his needs and goals. That was a start.

“Very well,” Sean said, not taking as long to reply as Oriel had. After all, he wasn’t going to turn the boy away, and thus he needed far less time to consider options. He then offered one large hand out for a handshake. “We’ll cross that bridge later, and we have an agreement.”

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At the moment, Oriel was only willing to take make the efforts he was comfortable in taking. Then he'd take more once he got those down. Just like learning a new dance number, you didn't try to do the whole thing after only seeing it once. Though….that analogy was really depressing because he knew of some people who could actually do that with little to no effort at all and ridiculed those who couldn't. Or more accurately, looked at him and condemned him with their eyes because he didn't go to some fancy school that taught him how to do things that quickly or….

Oriel needed to get off that train of thought.

Though, rationally, Oriel knew that he'd be doing more than just what he agreed to just now. He was still feeling anxious. Oriel didn't think that would ever go away. But he did feel good, at least a little, about taking this first step. "Alright…" he breathed somewhat shakily. Oriel stared at Sean's outstretched hand for a moment before offering his own and clasping it firmly. "I'll…I guess I'll see you next time." Oriel nodded hesitantly before releasing the handshake and taking his leave from the office.

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Baby steps. That would be the mantra for this exercise: Baby steps. For the moment Oriel had agreed to work on his anger problems and his self-control, even if he had chosen a sub-optimal process for tackling those issues. Additionally, the boy did earn some credit for choosing to undertake this himself, rather than being sent as the result of a disciplinary action.

Baby steps.

Fortunately, Sean was an exceedingly patient man.

The handshake was firm, and the psychiatrist didn’t use it as a contest of wills. Rather, it solidified their agreement, and he viewed it as evidence of good faith from both of them.

When Oriel released his hand, the psychiatrist nodded. “We’ll make an appointment and go from there.”

Then, once he was alone in his office again, Sean took the few moments to make notes to himself in Oriel’s file. From there, he rose from his desk and approached the therapeutic manuals on his bookshelf. He had one on anger management, although it, too, was geared towards a support group setting rather than individual one-on-one care.

No matter. Sean would refresh his knowledge base and research what he could, before he adapted as well as he was able. Otherwise, they would wing it.