The World is Burning to the Ground [Lucy]

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Ever since their little…moment, Penelope had gone out of her way to avoid Lucy. She had gone so far out of her way, in fact, that she had barely left her room for the past four days, leaving only when absolutely necessary. Being in there was just as painful a reminder, of course, seeing as Penelope hadn’t painted over any of the work Lucy had done. She mostly settled for reading on her stomach, so she wouldn’t have to look at it and be reminded of it all.

Today, though, Penelope had to get out of her room. She couldn’t let herself be cooped up in there just because a girl kissed her. Penelope buttoned up a long wool jacket, deciding to go out to Pilot Ridge for a bit of shopping. There was no way she would run into Lucy if she just went straight there. She glanced over at the handprint that marked the wall next to her door and her stomach tightened. She needed to get out.

Grabbing a small satchel bag, Penelope slung it over her shoulder and opened her door, only to find Lucy crouched down right in front of it.

Penelope’s eyes widened slightly. Of course this would happen.

“What are you doing?” She asked, raising an eyebrow at her. She tried to sound like she didn’t care, but there was a slight strain in her voice.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Lucy was an expert at avoiding people. In fact, she was an expert at avoiding a vast majority of the world. But she was telling herself that she kept herself locked up in her room because she didn't want anyone to see the burning red mark on her cheek. Thankfully, four days later it was gone. And she was free to live a little less like a hermit and more like the person she used to be. She'd been a little less shy in her techniques, knowing if she ran into this girl - or that girl, or that boy - she'd be perfectly capable of playing it off.

But she'd worked on something important in the time she was gone. She still had that stupid book the OCD Queen had either ignored or forgotten about, and she'd turned it into something of an apology within itself.

The pages no longer contained the story written. Lucy had shifted the letters individually so The Hobbit was replaced with a flip-book style globe. Each page had a slightly turned image. The process had been slow and endearingly painful for her, but it'd worked well enough. Her plan was to just drop it at the girl's door. She'd walked into the common area without a lock in her way and proceeded to kneel down before her door. She was literally just about to drop it down when the door itself opened.

"Shit." The Australian seethed, glancing up just as it opened to see. Well, who else was she expecting?

Quickly, Lucy propped herself up again, stuffing her free hand into the pocket of her leather jacket. She held the book steady in the other when the girl asked her a question. Lucy eventually looked at her face, taking in the sight for a sliver of a moment before looking back down at the book. Idly - or seemingly so - she tossed it over to Penny. "You left this." Lucy replied, her gaze traveling past the girl and into the room. There it was, clear as night.

The corner of her mouth lifted into an unconscious smile.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope couldn’t manage to bring herself to look directly into Lucy’s eyes, instead her gaze shifted around, before settling on the book in her hands. She had intended to grab it when she was cleaning Lucy’s room, but once again left it behind when she rushed out.

Penny caught the book, and a flash of memory ran through her head. It was barely a few second, but she was looking down at the book from Lucy’s perspective. She watched as hand that was not her own run over the pages of the book. It felt oddly personal.

“Thanks.” She finally glanced up at Lucy as she snapped out of the memory. She hadn’t seen the ink shift on the page, and still had yet to know that anything had changed within the bindings of the book.

As she caught sight of the smile, Penelope defensively straightened her back. “I was on my way to get white paint.” She lied. If she were to paint over it, she would have done it days ago. Why did she have to lie? Why did she feel a need to anger Lucy? Penelope closed her eyes for a moment, trying to clear her thoughts.

Penelope opened her eyes, running a hand affectionately over the cover of the book. Idly, she flipped it open. She hadn’t expected anything to be different, and as she glanced down at the book, her eyebrows knitted together in confusion. What happened to the words? She immediately started to flip through the book, realizing what it was.

“This…this is—“ Astonishing. Beautiful. Sweet. She looked up at Lucy, her eyes expressing her thoughts, even if she couldn’t say them aloud. “What’s this about?”

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

When the book was caught, Lucy stuffed her other hand into her other pocket. She had every intention of keeping them hidden, lest they try to occupy themselves by making contact with her again. Truthfully, Lucy was almost afraid to touch her. She was cautious. She didn't want to feel like that again any time soon.

"Yeah, okay." Lucy replied, feeling a little uncomfortable about the nature of thanks.

Lucy dropped her smile in a fraction of time, replacing it with an equally unconscious frown. She looked a little annoyed. "Fine." Was all she said. She didn't have the energy to argue, or pick apart the statement like she might have wanted to. She could have torn something so simple to pieces - even suggested to help her destroy it all. But no, somehow it didn't seem worthwhile anymore.

Without a word, Lucy offered a small nod and took a half step back. She had every intention of leaving, especially when she realised Penny was about to open the pages. Lucy was hoping not to be there for this part. But she stopped without being able to turn towards the door. Glancing to either side - checking to see if anyone was around - the Australian shrugged her shoulders.

"I dunno," She lied. But who else would have done something like that? "What's it look like?"

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Lucy's harsh reaction hit Penelope harder than she anticipated. Was she really becoming empathetic towards Lucy, of all people?

Penelope felt a faint smile play about her lips as she flipped through the book. Normally, destruction of such a book would make her fume, but she couldn't bring herself to get angry about it. Penny noticed Lucy shove her hands in her pockets, and raised her eyebrows, assuming that Lucy did so in a defensive manner. She pursed her lips, trying to think of the right words to say. Why was it that Lucy always made her mind blank? It was quite annoying. You know, in an endearing sort of way.

Wait. No. It wasn't endearing.

“It looks like you put a lot of effort into it.” Penelope stated cautiously, unsure what to say from Lucy's hesitation. “...Thank you.” She spoke softly as she closed the book. “That's...really sweet of you.” What on earth was she saying? Penelope shook her head in disbelief at her own words.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Lucy felt the weight of the situation on her shoulders. She had absolutely no intention of running into her in the first place, and now that she had, she didn't really know what to do with herself. She shifted every so often on her feet because standing still was difficult. She'd only look at her for a few seconds at a time before glancing at something else in the room.

"It wasn't easy." She replied subconsciously. She felt it spoke multitudes to how much effort she'd put in.

But at another vote of thanks, Lucy sharply turned her eyes back to her again. Those words felt incredibly dangerous in a situation like this. Between people like this. Who carried thoughts and memories like...

Maybe she wasn't thinking about it.

"Right. Okay. Well, yeah." She stammered on, failing to think of a subject change and subsequently get her mind off what she was sure she just realised. "You've got shit to do, so..." She proceeded to turn around and cringe at her own inability to speak properly as she starting walking away. She had to get the hell out of there.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

This was just too much. Penelope felt herself shifting her gaze towards the floor and around them. Anywhere but at Lucy. She had no idea how hard it was for the other to do such a thing to her book, but she couldn't imagine that it would be anything close to easy.

Penelope cleared her throat, trying to think of a change of subject, but her mind kept drifting towards the memories and thoughts she had been trying so hard to suppress the past few days. It made it almost impossible to think.

She wondered if Lucy thought the same.

Penelope was thrown off guard by Lucy's stammers; maybe she was thinking – not likely. As Lucy turned, Penelope felt her hand twitch with the urge to just grab the girl and make her stay. She wasn't ready for Lucy to leave just yet.

“I wasn't going to paint over it.” She blurted out without a warning.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

It was difficult to suppress the way Lucy's mind objectively told her what to do. She rarely struggled with the concept of what the mind wanted versus what the heart wanted, because she didn't believe it was a legitimate thing. The mind was over encompassing. It owned her entirely. She had no problem with that.

But she ended up stopping anyway.

Releasing her hands from their hiding spots in her pockets, Lucy ran them along her face slowly. Whatever she wanted from her, it had better have been important. Turning back around, she wasn't really sure what to do with herself. It wasn't a conversation she wanted to have in a room like this.

"Why'd you say you were going to?" Lucy asked, but moments later she shook her head, running a hand through her hair for something to do. "Nevermind. It's your room. Do whatever you want."

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope's heart raced when Lucy stopped. She half believed that the girl would just keep walking. But Lucy still stopped and that was what mattered. “Wait.” She demanded. She had nothing planned after that. It was as far as her mind got.

So she answered honestly.

“Because you bug me.” Penelope crossed her arms, feeling the need to put herself in a defensive position around the girl. She paused a moment, before taking a step closer, eying Lucy. “You piss me off.” She was quickly starting to sound irritated. Because, in reality, she was.

“And every day, I need that reminder. Because it's not enough that I can't stop thinking about you, I still like to see that stupid hand print every single day.” She uncrossed her arms, taking a step closer again as she pointed in the direction of the mark Lucy had left several days before. She sucked in a breath, her irritation clear in her eyes as she stared at Lucy. “And it bugs me that I like it.”

Penelope suddenly grabbed Lucy's arms, pulling her towards her, and kissed her.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Everything about Penelope exhausted Lucy. Even being in the same room as her for this long was draining. She felt like she'd been there for hours - like they were about to have the same impending argument they always had. This argument between mentalities. Freedom against restraints. The Australian didn't feel like today was the day for another round, so she had every intention of continuing to try and leave.

It got worse when her counterpart admitted that she was annoying her. It was the kind of berating she didn't really want to have to deal with. She almost went to tell her that she'd come back later and Penny could bash her all she wanted. But instead, she kept her ground with the innate desire to defend herself.

But it was different when Penny was getting closer to her. She knew it was important to keep her guard up, but it was difficult. It was why she'd kept so much distance between them this whole time. Being close felt dangerous, like she could slip off the edge at any moment and struggle to drag herself back to even ground.

At any rate, she didn't have time to think of a response. Suddenly she was pulled inward and kissed; an act worthy of déjà vu. But because the eldest Serrano didn't have time to think, she didn't have the means to deny what she wanted. It was like how it was days ago, minus the unrelenting throbbing of her cheek. And just like last time, Lucy gave in entirely to the kiss - the act. The desperation and the need.

Until she didn't.

Lucy half-stumbled, stepping forward and forcing her back against the wall by the door. She pulled back, her eyes opening and staring blankly at the girl she'd once again trapped in her hold. "You-" She started. She was the one who thought this wasn't okay. Lucy pressed her hands to her face gently.

This girl was too refined for her. Too filtered. Too confusing. But she closed her eyes and leaned back into kiss her anyway. She didn't know why.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope's head was screaming about how this wasn't right – how this was too dangerous, too messy and confusing, but for once Penelope didn't listen to logic. She just did it, and she wasn't quite sure why. As their lips met, Penelope felt a mix of emotions that stirred within her, making her stomach flutter and her heart race. Nothing was right about this, and that was what possibly made it so wonderful.

Penelope's eyes opened as she felt Lucy step away, out of her grasp. She looked back at Lucy, confusion in her eyes. Not just from Lucy's reaction, but from her own actions. Her mind was running slow, and started to finally catch up.

But she still couldn't figure it out. Everything was unclear. If Lucy slapped her, she would have expected it, after all, it was her turn for it.

Penelope was about to apologize for her actions, but before she could utter a word, she felt Lucy's hands on her face. The contact alone was enough to silence her, but then she again felt Lucy's lips against her own. Penelope, too, couldn't stop herself from admitting what she wanted, and gave into the kiss without time to think twice about it.

Slowly, Penelope brought her hand up, running a thumb gently along where she had slapped the other. A sort of unspoken apology. Her other hand found its way to rest against the small of Lucy's back. She had no idea what she was doing, but it felt right.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

When Lucy stared back at her, she was searching for something. A sign, maybe. That she should step back and walk out. It felt too much like last time; given how that ended, caution felt necessary. She'd been trying so hard to avoid all contact, and this was why.

She had struggled to find the right words. So she lost her nerve before she really started to argue. Nothing felt worthy of voicing.

Her cheek no longer ached with the remnants of Penelope's denial. Still, there was some dedication to the way this girl gently caressed the skin she'd attacked. Lucy felt remorse; comforted by the other hand that held her body steady. It was more than just the innate human desire for contact that spurned her into kissing the other girl with such induced passion and need. It was her.

But any more and she feared she might ruin her.

Lucy needed to breathe in every sense of the word. She broke away, save for the singular moment where she leaned in and briefly - delicately - kissed her again. She exhaled sharply, sure where to look but unsure if those eyes wanted to connect with her again. Lucy leaned in towards her again, bypassing her lips and instead resting her forehead against Penny's shoulder. Her arms encircled the other girl, this time drawing her into an embrace. It felt more personal than everything else. More imperative. But it was also terrifying.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

As they pulled away once again, Penelope inhaled slowly, catching her breath as well. The gentleness between them was startling, especially considering how aggressive their attitudes were with one another not that long ago.

Penelope's eyes fluttered open as she continued to regulate her breathing. Her eyes connected with Lucy's and she knew that things wouldn't be the same – how could they be, after all? Penelope was not one for such intimate contact, but she felt comfortable when she was close to Lucy. The thought of it was alarming, but she wasn't planning on letting go. Her head was fuzzy from everything happening; it was still so confusing. Everything was new and scary, and Penelope had no idea what to do about it.

She felt Lucy's arms pull her in closer, and as Lucy rested her head on Penelope's shoulders, she felt a warm, genuine smile tug at her lips as most of her concerns were able to melt away with the touch. At least for the time being. The contact felt so intimate and personal, and Penelope wasn't used to it. She gently leaned her forehead against Lucy's hair, remaining silent. She didn't feel the need to speak, the their unspoken actions were enough.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Lucy felt the sliver of fear evaporate from her form when the light of the situation finally reached her - that this person wasn't forcing her away, or hitting her in retaliation. She was reciprocating the imperative action Lucy had put into play. She relished in the ability to hold her counterpart close for as long as she could. She didn't feel she had much time left.

Why, she didn't know.

Eventually - and she couldn't say how much time had really passed - Lucy endeavored to let her go again. It was simple; she retracted her arms from around Penny, slowly relinquishing her hold as if she didn't really want to. She curled her fingers around the other girl's arm, trailing along as she stepped back until she found her hand. Her fingers fastened around her hand briefly, encompassing it in a small squeeze. She didn't let go yet.

"I should go." Lucy said simply, her gaze traveling from their hands back to Penelope's face. It was for the best, right? Whatever the best was.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope didn’t know how long they had been like that, but when Lucy started to pull away, she felt like she wasn’t quite ready to let go. She returned the gesture by running a thumb over Lucy’s, also giving a soft squeeze. Penelope watched Lucy carefully, unsure what to say or do – it was a new experience, and Penelope didn’t know the steps.

She tried her best not to look concerned at Lucy’s words, but the emotion flickered in her eyes. Was this how it was going to go? They’d just do this little dance until one of them left and then try to pretend it never happened until it inevitably did again? Penelope started to feel a migraine develop as she tried to find a break in the loop.

But Lucy was right: she should go. Something wasn’t right between them, or at least, that was what logic clearly stated. Penelope gave a small nod, yet she felt in the pit of her stomach that she wanted the other to stay. The thought of them doing this idiotic routine over again was too hard to bear.

“Are you hungry?” She asked suddenly, her eyes snapping back up to Lucy as she spoke. It was the first thing she could think of to have Lucy stay with her. “I was going to go to the grocery store and get some things to cook dinner.” She explained quickly. She was a pretty good cook – and it wasn’t like Lucy had to say yes. Penelope was just praying she did.