If I Can't Breathe You (Penny)

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Days had passed. Lucy wouldn't say she'd been distant, but she couldn't exactly say she'd been seeking the other girl out.

Because she hadn't.

It wasn't even anything she did or didn't do. When other people were around, Penny seemed to reform back to the Blaise who hated her. And that was fine - she could play that up better than anyone else, even if it irked her to do so.

That night, the Australian had confined herself to her room. She'd already participated in the standard call from her parents. They were pedantically periodic about it. They even asked why she was so annoyed today. Today. Like they didn't get what time it was for her. Regardless, she didn't answer. She updated them on Nica's life and was done with it.

It still felt so early in the night.

After spending a little more time sending messages to Rowan and realising he was probably too busy with Alex or some other queen to answer, she aptly decided to call it a night. At least, until she heard a knock at the door.

At first she waited, because she always did when people knocked. They were rarely looking for her randomly; the people who looked for her messaged first to make sure she was even there. But when Lucy realised no one was around, or everyone was just as lazy, she decided to haul herself up and answer. To combat the cold she dragged a sweater over her body, thankful it was long enough to cover herself so she didn't need to scrounge around for pants or shorts.

Strolling out of her room, she geared up for the fun that was barraging one of her roommates. She started up before she'd even touched the door; "You leave your fucking keys here again, you little shi-?" The door opened, "-Ahh."

That wasn't her roommate.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

She had said that she’d come back. Penelope had tried to be patient, but found that she wasn’t very good at it. The more time that passed, the more worried Penelope grew over the situation. And with worry over Lucy, irritation usually followed, as it did with this particular situation.

Yes, she had gone as far as acting as if nothing had ever happened between them, or at least when there were other people around. She didn’t mean to do so in a hurtful manner, but simply didn’t know how to act. They had yet to define boundaries or anything of the sort.

So she found herself knocking on Lucy’s door. If there were boundaries defined, she’d probably be crossing them at that moment, but she didn’t care enough to stop. She waited a moment, lips pursed as she waited for the door to open. She was just starting to wonder if anyone was there when Lucy finally swung open the door, cursing as she did so. No surprise.

Penelope raised her eyebrows at the other, giving her a disapproving look while her hand was placed on her hip. “What is wrong with you?” She demanded quietly. Fire was in her eyes as she stared down the other girl. She stepped inside without permission. "Do you have even the slightest amount of courtesy left in you?"

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Ah, that disapproving look was tearing right through her tonight. Idly, Lucy wondered how much trouble she'd get in if she closed the door; there were few things that were more uncomfortable than being stared at like that. Lucy watched as she breezed past her, standing with a confused expression on her face.

Yeeaah, she was in trouble.

Courtesy? What'd that mean? Her arm swung out in the direction of the common area. Where she was already standing. She pushed the door closed. No point in leaving the thing open if she was just going to waltz on in like she owned the place.

"...Come in?" She asked in tandem, acutely aware that she meant something else entirely. But making light of a situation was a mechanism within itself.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope knew she shouldn’t had just stomped inside, but she wanted to get her point across. The fact that Lucy didn’t even seem to acknowledge her question was more than irritating, and she found herself recalling exactly why she had claimed to hate the girl for so long.

“Don’t you even start with that.” Penelope pointed. No games. No jokes. She didn’t have the energy to try to beat around the bush. It wasn’t her style. “What do you think this is? Just want to fool around with someone then let them sit and wait and worry about everything they might have done wrong?” She paused a moment, realizing she already said more than she intended to.

“You said you’d come back.” She stated, trying to force herself to not sound hurt. But she was hurt, and that drove her nuts. She crossed her arms, waiting for a response.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Admittedly, Lucy knew she was antagonising her with her response. Why else would she have said it? This girl liked rules and boundaries, but she was fit to barge in anyway. Calling her out on that fact seemed like second nature by now.

She didn't really know what to expect. It was obvious she was mad, but only after she'd spoken was it clear she was hurt. Lucy's stonewall exterior softened a touch at the realisation. She had to wonder if she could actually say anything to make this better. When it came to Penny, words rarely seemed to be her forte.

But she didn't want to get slapped again, so the physical option was well out of reach.

"I don't think that." Lucy stated flatly, indicating with a hand that she could go into her room if she wanted. If she bothered to venture inside, she'd quickly realise that little had changed since things were straightened out. Some things were out of place, but they always would be. This was Lucy.

"You didn't do anything wrong." She added, folding her arms before her chest.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope wished she could just hate Lucy. It would have made things so much simpler. Yes, she was angry, but she also wanted to know why Lucy avoided her, and the possible answers that filled her mind put Penny in a state of self-doubt.

Without a word, she followed the gesture, entering Lucy’s room quietly. As she looked around, her jaw dropped slightly at the sight before her. The room was, more or less, still as Penny had left it. Some items have been shifted around, but it was minimal. Penny had expected the room to be in a similar state that she had originally found it. The girl even went as far as to take care of muddy blanket by replacing it with a new, clean one.

She couldn’t stop a small smile from taking her lips for just a second.

But it disappeared as soon as it came, and she focused back on Lucy. She was confused by the girl’s answer, or too irritated to think clearly. “Then what happened?” She asked, trying to keep her tone hard. Anger was easier to deal with than pain.

She looked at Lucy carefully. The girl was, like Penny, taking a defensive stand, and a wave of guilt suddenly hit Penny as she realized that maybe there was more to the story. Her own features softened as she uncrossed her arms.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Lucy watched Penny walk into her room, taking a short moment to breathe in and exhale a lengthy sigh before she followed suit.

Given the way she stood, her reaction to the room was lost to the Australian. Instead, she turned around the closed the door behind her. Lucy took the moment to stare back at it. Keeping herself in control of this situation was more than likely going to be key. She looked back towards her.

"Nothing." Lucy said definitively. Because nothing really had happened.

Save for the strange sting of Penny's decision to be as cold as ever in public.

"I was going to come back." She started again, nodding her head slightly to the fact; "I just didn't know when."

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope hesitated as Lucy closed the door, and casually walked over towards Lucy’s desk. She needed to keep her distance from the other. If not…well, she wouldn’t be able to get the point that she was angry across.

She wasn’t sure how to take Lucy’s answer. She tried to search for a meaning in it that didn’t hurt, but she kept coming to the same conclusion. It meant nothing.

She picked up one of the game cases on her desk, looking over the cover just so she didn’t have to look Lucy in the eyes. “Fine.” The normally wordy girl had resorted to short answers.

“Well you didn’t.” Penelope straightened her back, letting irritation flood her again. She placed the game case back on the desk gently. “Don’t worry about it.” She was already too tired for this, and started heading for the door.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

This was starting to feel dangerous. Lucy found herself confused - which was a rarity when dealing with anyone who wasn't this particular girl. Lucy didn't move from where she was standing. She felt it would be detrimental to shift in any way towards her. Like it wasn't wanted.

That was fine.

She pursed her lips, finding frustration in the short answers she was getting. That was her thing. Blaise was a wordy girl who loved to talk - except when she didn't.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Lucy started, her eyes narrowing. She was thankfully close enough to the door that she could lean back against it, pressing her shoulders and a foot to the only available exit. "What'd you just hear me say? Did I say I was done with you?"

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

“Do I look like the kind of person who kids around?” She snapped. Penelope stopped short at the door as Lucy leaned against it, and she clenched her jaw as she got the feeling of déjà vu. Except in this case, the roles were reversed.

“Move.” She demanded. She couldn’t put herself in a position to try to physically move the Australian. She couldn’t lose control of the situation, but she was already starting to feel it slip from her fingers.

She waited a moment, but knew that her words weren’t going to make the Serrano budge. Well, she couldn’t very well wreck the girl’s room like she had with Penny. Her lips pursed as she went about thinking how to make her move, because there was no way she was going to stay.

She turned on her heel and headed back to her desk, taking a seat and crossing her legs. “Fine. Might as well do something to pass the time.” She stated almost casually, she clicked on one of the desktop icons to something that she assumed was a game. Penelope just hoped it was one Lucy cared about. "Maybe I'll go around running obscurities and spending all your money." Surprisingly, she did have little knowledge of MMORPGs, for her brother played them.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Lucy didn't bother answering, because in this exact moment, she did.

She offered a steely expression, guarded with pent up frustration when she came closer. She knew how this looked - what it felt like - but it seemed imperative. At what point did it make sense to come barging in here just to leave on a whim without granting the Australian the means to a proper explanation? She wasn't kidding. She wasn't playing around. She wasn't moving.

Lucy glanced down at the way her lips pursed; she always did that when she was thinking.

But it was uncomfortable to physically watch someone go through her belongings. Fiddling with the contents of her desk. She'd finally bothered to open the thing Dom gave her, at least partially. The blue-gold wrapping had been torn enough to see the title of the book visible enough to at least know what it was.

"Why're you being an idiot?" Lucy asked, furrowing her eyebrows as she pulled up from the door, "If you want to talk to me, why don't you?"

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penelope started up the game. Fortunately, the login username and password were saved to the computer. As the game was loading, she glanced around Lucy’s desk, still refusing to make any form of eye contact with the girl. She picked up a stray pen, placing it in its proper spot, and caught site of the book that was wrapped up. It was hard not to miss it, but the sound of the game finishing loading brought her attention back to the computer screen. She pressed a few buttons on the keyboard, causing various windows to pop up – she honestly had no idea how to play and just figured if she hit enough buttons something would work.

Idiot? Penelope raised her eyebrows at the comment and finally decided to face the girl. She turned the chair, staring at the Australian. “I don’t want to talk.” Of course she wanted to talk. It was Penelope Blaise we were dealing with. “You already answered my only question. That’s enough.” It wasn’t.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

It was really irritating to physically watch this girl tidy things up. Why, she didn't really know. But it was seriously annoying. Lucy was a stubborn individual - the type who committed to her stance with every ounce of energy she has. She cringed when Penny all but bashed the living hell out of her keyboard.

Okay, that was it. She had no idea what she had her hands on.

"I really like how understanding you are," Lucy interjected, her voice dripping with sarcasm as she finally crossed the distance between them. She pressed her hand down against the desk, leaning over her to watch what she was doing with scrutiny; "It's not like I said I was never coming back." She practically seethed the words through her teeth as she reached out with her free hand to, at the very least, rid the screen of excess information. "How am I meant to know when you actually want me to be around?"

She might actually kill her if she dropped her inventory items.

[Penelope Serrano-Blaise]

Penny wasn’t exactly sure what she had done in the game. If she had actually done any damage to the account, she had no idea she did so. As Lucy approached her, she knew she had a chance to get away, but she remained still in the chair. She held in a breath as the other leaned forward. She was too close. She looked at Lucy's hands as she cleared away the windows on the screen. Even if it was just pressing a few buttons, the girl did it with such natural precision. Like it was as easy as breathing.

But Penny still didn’t move. Instead she let the other clear off the screen, but still proceeded to play with the game. She had even figured out how to walk. It was great progress.

“When were you planning on it, then?” Penelope asked with scrutiny, still on edge from the girl’s earlier comment. She paused in the game, looking up at the other. “Oh, I’m not sure, have you ever tried asking?” She said sarcastically, “You also seem to just love entering without permission. I assumed you’d just do that.”

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

It took a second or so for the proximity to take effect. In fact, it wasn't until Penny was pausing things and looking at her that she reaslised how close she'd become. Thankfully, her inventory was safe from Penny's noob status. But truthfully, the status of her digital Twin Blade of the Phoenix was the furthest thing from her mind in an instant.

Surely she knew by now that Lucy didn't plan these things.

"Did you?" Lucy asked, raising her eyebrows as she glanced down at her finally. She was growing tired of always being the dominant personality when it came to the people in her life, strange as that might have been. Lucy opened her mouth to speak again, but she felt snagged.

She stared down at her, jaw slightly dropped. Recognition in her eyes. "Were... Were you actually waiting for me?"