Cigarettes and Repressed Memories (Jade)

[James Lawrence]

The crowd erupted into cheers at the band exited the stage of the small venue. James was part of the pumped crowd, hovering near the back of the crowd with a half empty drink in his hand. The nice thing about his ability was the New York native didn't find it necessary to make his way to the barricade; he could stand near the back and appreciate the show. Hell, he could probably hear it better than anyone else in the room. James made the effort to 'turn down' the enhanced hearing, as the ringing began to fill his ears.

Lifting the glass to his mouth, he drank the last of the whiskey, setting it down on the counter of the bar with a few bills as a tip. The ringing in his ears continued, as the crowd began to disperse out the exits in a rush. James lingered around the bar for a moment, smirking and eyeing up the one girl behind it. Of course, she was all over every single word he was saying. Girls loved him.

With one last coy smile, James walked away, heading towards the exit. It was slow moving, but finally, the cold, night breeze hit his face. He exhaled, breathing in the fresh air and spotting a stunning dark haired lady who seemed to be alone. A smirk toyed on his lips, as James decided to go approach the girl. If the one girl behind the bar was pretty, then this girl was a whole other world.

"Good show they put on." James opened up, pausing to stand beside the girl. His hair, impeccable, as always. Leather jacket... girls loved it... He didn't have any doubts whatsoever.

[Jade Parrish]

The concert had been fucking awesome, except for the part where Jade couldn't buy drinks from the bar. She was less than a year away from being twenty-one, but that didn't matter to a bartender and while Jade was great at flirting, she didn't like using guys or girls to get herself drinks. Besides, the small black flask in her purse would have to do.

She'd finally escaped the humid, sticky air of the venue and was leaning up against the cool brick of the building. Last time she'd been at a concert she'd met Oliver. Funny how she had a non dating policy and then she finally made an exception for a guy who she thought could handle her and now he was back in the UK and Jade was left wondering why the hell she made that exception. It just didn't work out. Whatever.

She took her flask out of her purse and lifted it to her lips, feeling the burn of the vodka as it went down her throat. "Always is," Jade agreed with the random stranger who had come up beside her.

[James Lawrence]

The rest of the crowd dispersed once outside the building, waves of conversation hitting James like a bus. He winced, 'turning off' his ability so he didn't feel overwhelmed by the hundreds of conversations in such close proximity to the New York native. The beginning of a migraine formed, causing him to rub the temple of his forehead with a grunt.

"Never seen them before tonight." James commented. He appreciated the talent the band had, though. Not many bands today could boast an ability to put on a great live show. One day, he hoped to be like them. Even playing in small venues were better than bars and clubs.

"So, what's a beautiful, young woman like you attending a concert alone for?" James asked, reaching into the pocket of his leather jacket for his cigarettes. He flipped open the pack, took one out and placed it between his lips, before extending it out to the dark haired stunner. He began digging around for the lighter, as well.

[Jade Parrish]

"Really? What made you wanna come then?" Jade asked him, curiously. She'd known of the band for a while. They had at least two albums out. And this was her second time seeing them in concert. She tried to go to concerts in Vermont whenever she could. She wondered if he was really into music or if he just went for the hell of it, because he was bored.

She was about to answer his question, a little annoyed by how he'd phrased it, but that was normal for her. But she stopped short and clamped her mouth shut when she saw him take out a pack of cigarettes. Her past poison. And then he put one right between his lips. "Please tell me that's a fucking metaphor," she said, her voice suddenly sour, taking a line from a book she'd probably never read, but had heard about. And then he extended the pack out to her. "Did you just assume that I smoked?" She'd quit, just a while after coming to Pilot Ridge when she'd been thrown into Hammel. She'd always had a high drive and so while it was hard, it was doable.

[James Lawrence]

"Well, they came up on Pandora. I enjoyed the song, looked up more, bought their albums, saw they were doing a live show and decided I had to go see them." James summarized. "Don't know why they chose Vermont, of all places." He mused to himself. That's why he had gone back to New York after graduation, to try and make a name for himself in the music scene. It seemed easier to do in a massive city like NYC, but also made the competition incredibly difficult.

"They're good, though. Don't shop themselves up in studio and suck live." Which seemed to be rare these days.

James didn't think much of his habit. Half the time he didn't even realize that he was reaching for a smoke; it was just his secondhand nature now. Before the new York native could process what he was doing, the dark haired girl was asking him if it was some kind of metaphor. "A metaphor?" James repeated. Then, he began to laugh. "I fail to see how smoking is a metaphor, darling."

"Not assume necessarily, no. I was only offering if you wanted to." With her demeanor, James decided that it would be best to retract the offer. He flipped the pack close, and tucked it away before lighting a cigarette. Although, now he was curious what she had against smoking. First, James had pissed off his blonde neighbour and now her. "You have a relative that die of cancer or something?"

[Jade Parrish]

"Some bands are really dedicated to their fanbases, no matter where they are," Jade explained. It depended on what the band's priorities were. "Yep. You know a band is promising when they don't sound completely different on stage than they do on their albums." It was the truth after all. And this band had passed the test in Jade's opinion.

"Nevermind," she said, waving it off with somewhat of an attitude in her voice when the guy called her 'darling.' She hated when people used pet names as a way to diffuse a situation. It was obnoxious. "It was a reference to a book. However, maybe you don't read." It wasn't necessarily a jab, but it could be read as one. "And offering a cigarette isn't like just offering someone a french fry from your plate. It's not exactly polite anymore when cigarettes aid in killing you." He'd finally taken the pack back at least, but now he was lighting up in front of her.

"No," she replied. Of course that's what he would jump to though. "Not everyone who doesn't like smoking dislikes it because of a relative dying from cancer. We dislike it because it's harmful in general." Harmful in ways Jade hadn't even imagined before she set fire to her childhood home on accident.

[James Lawrence]

James shrugged. Sure, some bands were in it for the fans, but the majority were in it for the lifestyle. It had appealed to him, so he would know. Her next statement he agreed with. If someone was going to pursue a musical career, he believed that they should have the talent to back it up instead of relying on technology.

With the lit cigarette in his mouth, James raised an eyebrow. "So you're going to make that assumption about me 'cause I didn't know one book quote?" He asked. He enjoyed reading, mostly historic and non-fiction works. He took a long drag, exhaling a cloud of smoke away from the dark haired girl. "Darling, don't you know death is inevitable? No avoiding it." Plenty of people died from obesity, but it didn't stop them from eating McDonalds.

Pausing, he flicked some of the ashes to the ground, holding it between his fingers. "As I said, there's a lot of harmful things in life. Look." James motioned towards a group of young men, all with a bottle or two in their hand. "Drinking can lead to death." An arrogant smirk appeared on his face. "There's a lot of harm in the world, wouldn't you agree?" With that, he inhaled another drag.

[Jade Parrish]

"No, I'm only being rude because you insist on calling me various pet names," Jade shot back. It wasn't so much that she thought he didn't read. Maybe he did, maybe he didn't. But the way he spoke to her made Jade more likely to bite.

When he exhaled the smoke he'd taken in, she was just grateful she'd done it in the other direction. And then once again, he'd called her 'darling.' "Doesn't mean you have to bring on death any faster." It sounded like he was trying to sound poetic or some shit and Jade wasn't buying it.

"Yeah, there are many harmful things," Jade agreed. "But we choose to expose ourselves to some of them. Smoking a cigarette is a choice, unlike walking out your front door and getting shot. It's different." She really felt the need to make her points clear with this guy because it seemed like he realy thought he was right about things. "And drinking doesn't lead to death if you're careful. Again, your choice." Was he that ignorant or what? Of course there was danger all around, but a lot of it was there because you let it be.

[James Lawrence]

"Well, would you like to give me a name so I can call you that instead?" The overwhelming, charming persona that James put on had faded slightly, mostly... annoyed by the dark haired vixen's attitude. Like the smoking, the pet names were a habit that he had had for a long time. Most girls didn't mind it, and in fact, they found it charming. So, the arrogant man didn't understand why she was acting the way she was, especially in his presence.

"Plenty of people smoke a pack a day and go on to live to a hundred. Conversely, someone who eats organic, bikes to work everyday and does all the right things can die at the age of thirty." Inhale. Exhale. And even if he did die at a younger age, it wasn't something James was all too concerned about at the moment.

"Exactly. If you're careful, then generally, you'll still live a long and fufilling life." Taking the smoke out of his mouth, he let it dangle from his fingers loosely. It was a choice he made, a choice that did have consequences, but it was also an incredibly difficult habit that he couldn't kick.

[Jade Parrish]

Jade wasn't so sure he deserved her name and so she didn't give it to him, mostly ignored his request until he proved he deserved it. He just kept going on and on when Jade's slightly apathetic and slightly annoyed face apparently did nothing to stop him. "I don't care. There are things you can do to help better your odds and smoking isn't one of them." Everything else he was saying was irrelevant.

Being around the spiraling smoke reminded Jade of being at home, of stepping out onto the porch after a fight with her sister, of the anger she felt.

“Jade, I’m sorry.” It’s what she says the moment Jade enters their bedroom, slamming the door behind her. She’s scrambled to her feet from her desk.

“You said you wouldn’t tell. And you didn’t even have the right story.”

“I’m-”

“Kyle didn’t get me started on smoking. Bethany’s sister did. Years ago. She’s not as good as her parents think either.”

“I didn’t know. I was trying to help! Smoking is going to kill you.”


Fog weighs heavily down on the house like a thick blanket, but it’s anything but comforting. She stands on the porch, barefoot and with trembling hands, and lights up.

Inhale. Exhale. Headlights shine in the driveway. A half-burnt cigarette left on the porch. Burning embers. A fiery blaze.

There is screaming. Who is screaming?

[James Lawrence]

James opened his mouth to say something else that would only further embed the arrogant vibe he gave off, when he noticed the distant and half-glassy look in her eyes. His jaw relaxed, and he took a few more hits of nicotine, all without looking away. She still said nothing.

"Darling, you okay?" He asked, the tail end of his cigarette dangling between his fingers. He let it drop to the pavement, snuffing out the embers with the toe of his work boots. "You look a little deep in thought there." James commented. Was he concerned? Maybe. More confused than anything else, and it showed in his expression.

[Jade Parrish]

If James had argued with what she'd said, she hadn't heard it. She'd become submerged in a memory, and she was drowning in it, as if someone was holding her head under water, forcing her to watch it all over again, to fight for air. But what brought her back was the stupid pet name he kept calling her. "Is that how you pick up girls, or what? You call them darling and sweep them off their feet with your leather jacket?" She reached out and tugged on the sleeve of it. "Because guess what? I have a leather jacket too." She'd never been so erratic in her speech. What she was saying didn't even make sense and everything Jade said had a purpose behind it.

She watched as he stomped out the cigarette and when he moved his boot, she pressed her own combat boot onto it several times, repeatedly crushing the cigarette, knowing that sometimes they didn't fully go out from her own experiences.

[James Lawrence]

James raised an eyebrow at the tirade of questions that flowed, like a dam that had been burst. The flood of questions hit him, and she barely gave him any time to answer. He ignored the first question, since he was sure she wouldn't like his answer. Because it was yes; that's exactly what James did. Suddenly, the dark haired girl was grabbing onto his jacket and somehow he managed to keep the cool demeanour James strove to maintain.

"I can see that." He replied, raising an eyebrow. The babe seemed to be falling apart and briefly, James wondered why all the attractive ones seemed to be crazy. James edged away from her slightly, to try and get her to loosen her hold on his sleeve. It wasn't the physical contact alone that creeped James out, but combined with the way she was acting... he was definitely confused.

His eyes landed on the ground as she pulverized the remains of the cigarette. "I think it's out now." He said, dryly. James' gaze lifted from the ground up to her face again, not sure what to expect from her next.

[Jade Parrish]

He didn't answer her question, even though she already knew the answer, but he also didn't call her 'darling' again. So that was an improvement. Unfortunately, sometimes she had to be harsh to get guys like him to listen. "Well, it's a really annoying tick of yours. So I think you should work on that." She was trying to stick to rational conversation with snarky banter mixed in. That always worked for her. Kept her from being vulnerable when she didn't want to be, when she surpressed the human emotions that made her just want to break down completely in front of the totally wrong people.

"Sometimes it's not. Sometimes it's not only dangerous to just us, sometimes it's dangerous to others, and not just through second hand smoke." She was keeping herself in check for the most part now, although she felt herself continuously pushing away feelings. She was so angry, but not at James, at herself. Although she was taking it out on him, even if he did give her an asshole vibe.

[James Lawrence]

She seemed to be giving James a suggestion. Honestly, he couldn't tell if she was still trying to be sassy or if she was giving him her honest opinion. "The pet names?" He asked, confirming his suspicions. "I think they're... endearing." A smirk appeared on his face. Thankfully, the dark haired woman seemed to have recovered from her small outburst. Or maybe that was him thinking optimistically.

His eyes lingered on her combat boots and the ashy remains on the sidewalk. Leaning with his back against the wall, James supported himself upright and glanced at her. "I feel like this has nothing to do with the current situation." He put it bluntly, hearing the ever slight falters in her voice. Or maybe that was his imagination. James' gaze landed back on hers, waiting for a response to his own observation.