It's a Start [Dylan]

[Leila Gold]

Every Friday afternoon Leila did her weekly shopping at the local market. She was particularly happy this week as she did her shopping, because she'd just had a lovely conversation with her parents and she had plans to meet with Terrence later (not that it was particularly Terrence that was making her excited--it was always good to meet up with friends...right?). Even Cobalt hadn't been so grumpy today, even letting her go on a run to see a client instead of keeping her back at the office. Altogether, things were looking up today.

So as she went up and down the aisles she whistled softly to herself. It was only a soft whistle because she was perfectly aware of the fact that she was completely tone-deaf, and she wouldn't want to burst anyone's eardrums. As she careened around a corner, though, she almost ran into someone else.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" she said, stepping back. She lost her balance, though, as she tried to keep from running into the guy, and fell. "Ow," she said as she stood, rubbing her back. Unfortunately, her hand basket had dropped as well, meaning that the eggs had broken and some of the canned vegetables were rolling away.

"Oh no, did I spill on you?" she asked, looking at the egg splatter. "Let me see if I can go get some paper towels or something..." She tried to take a step but had to stop because of the pain that shot up her spine, radiating from her tailbone. "Ow!" she cried again, then looked up at the man. "I'm sorry, but could you help me? I appear to have hurt my, er...butt."

[Dylan Black]

Dylan had previously changed to going to the other market shortly after he got banned for beating people with frozen icecream tubs. He wasn't repeating that mistake again. He'd close to finished his shop - two loaves of bread, butter, few cans of soup. Typical food for a man on a very tight budget. He just had to grab himself a few beers and a bag of peas when he was very nearly bumped into.

He was about to snarl - what was it with Pilot Ridge and idiots going shopping - when he remembered what happened last time he'd said something in a supermarket. Taking a deep breath, he managed a nonchalant grunt and was going to leave it at that when she slipped.

Slapping his palm to face, he was going to just sort of wait for someone to pick her up when she called for aid. Though he'd managed to shuffle forward a few steps, he backtracked and watched the woman and winced. "Well, you did fall on your ass, what did you expect?" He grunted, shaking his head. "I'm fine, you missed spilling." His voice was somewhat tense as he edged closer, wondering how exactly to help without touching.

"So what do you want me to do?" Dylan eventually said hopelessly, setting his trolley aside and frowning. "Ugh, why do people always..." He began under his breath, before lifting his hand. "I'll go get a member of staff to come look after you or something." The sooner he could get away from Clumsy Sue and her sore ass, the better.

[Leila Gold]

Leila was glad to see that she hadn't spilled anything on the guy. One less mess to have to worry about. She gave a weak smile at him, still bent over with a hand on her back.

"Alternatively, instead of freaking out and running to an employee, you could just help me over to a trolley. I think if I have something to support my weight I'll be fine," she said, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. "Are you always this melodramatic?"

Still, though, there was the problem of the spilled eggs, as well as all the other groceries. She wasn't sure she wanted to try picking those up off the floor right now.

"Sorry to bother you, but could you just hand me those groceries?" she asked, pointing at the floor. "I don't know that I can bend over right now. My tailbone is really sore."

Squinting up at him, she frowned again. "I'm sorry, do I know you? You seem a bit familiar. Where do you work?"

[Dylan Black]

Dylan wondered if he was doomed to have unending annoyances when he was shopping. Or anything really. It was as though Pilot Ridge residents had this strong desire to all be friends, have a group hug and then sing songs of happiness and joy together.

"I'm not freaking out. I'm sorry I'm not dramatically lifting you into my arms and carrying you bridal style to the checkout." He snarked, folding his arms across his chest. He was sorely tempted to push away now and leave the woman there for that, but he grizzled and helped her back to a trolley all the same.

Muttering something about being a personal servant, Dylan grabbed the non-broken items and set them down in the newly acquired trolley. "There you go, now you can have a happy shopping journey." He raised his hands and moved to snake off again, and grab a shop attendant to clean up the mess when she said something else.

Clenching one fist, he took a deep breath. "I work at Hammel. I'm the janitor." He said rather abruptly, arching an eyebrow. "You're a little old for a student, and you're not on staff. Alum?" He asked, trying to be polite and not run away.

[Leila Gold]

"You don't have to get snippy," Leila said, wrinkling up her nose. "Once you start doing that you morph into something tiny and cranky. Trust me, I've seen it twenty years down the road, and it's not pretty."

Leaning on the shopping trolley, she noted the way that he raised his hands in almost a defensive position as he tried to get away. Talk about antisocial.

Well, she knew how to deal with antisocial. However, since throwing a party at his house wasn't exactly possible at this stage in time, she would settle for the next best thing--forcing him to communicate with other members of society.

"Oh really, the janitor? That's interesting." Not really, but she could fake interest. "Yes, I attended Hammel. Almost ten years ago now. These days I work as an attorney in town. If you ever need to sue someone, let me know. Name's Leila. Leila Gold. And you are...?" She held out her hand and opened her eyes wide in expectation.

"Do you have any plans for the afternoon?" she asked, eyes gleaming. "Other than throwing another tantrum and harassing other innocent inhabitants of Pilot Ridge?"

[Dylan Black]

Tiny and cranky? The only tiny and cranky thing Dylan had come across was Captain Moustache... she didn't mean him did she? He rubbed his upper lip in fear 80's porn-style facial hair had cropped up. "You don't mean the midget with the moustache, do you?" His voice almost sounded frightened. The idea of turning into that...

Please note that if Dylan ever found a party in his trailer, he would probably explode with sheer hatred and send a wave of angry household products to be rid of the visitors. His trailer is for smoking, eating, sleeping and writing, thank you very much. He doesn't want people invading his space.

He didn't comment on her finding the fact he was a janitor interesting. Probably because he had a hunch it was sarcasm. He offered a grumpy halfhearted shrug before replying.

"I don't think you can sue students for vomiting on carpets." He said with a tinge of disappointment. The man eyed the hand offered out and shook it rather quickly, as though he were afraid it would bite. "Dylan. Dylan Black." He grunted, looking at a can of soup as though it were interesting.

Dylan very nearly snapped none of your business to Leila, but he caught himself before he did so, and instead just scowled. "Finishing my shopping. Taking it home and then cleaning out my axolotl's tank." He said simply. Hopefully that would keep her away from the idea that he'd want to continue socialising.

"And I don't harass people, they harass me. I'm more than happy to get out of everyone's way."

[Leila Gold]

"Midget with--You mean you've met Blue? On behalf of my colleague, I apologize for anything he may have done to you. But that's a great way of describing him, I have to admit," she said with a sly smile. "Mustache. Heehee. I never even thought to mention it, but it really is a bit weird..." She trailed off in contemplation.

"Nice to meet you, Dylan," she said, shaking his hand. "And you'd be surprised what you can sue people for. It's all in the fine print, really. But I wouldn't suggest trying to sue them for the vomit thing. But if they ever try to sue you for slipping on a wet floor you've just mopped, let me know and we'll sort it out. There's plenty of clauses that'll not only get you off but get you some help because you can go after them for harassment, if you play your cards right."

She gave another huge smile and leaned forward. "You have an axolotl?!" she said with amazement. "That's so cool! I always wished I could have a cool pet. What's his name? Can I see it sometime?"

Leila laughed at his last comment. "Yeah, right, I bet you are. You seem like just the sort of person who gets along with everyone and hides in the background," she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Hey, since you're not doing anything, would you be able to help me out? I still have to get all this stuff home, and I'm not sure I'll be able to carry it all since I've been injured. Which was, you have to admit, at least partially your fault."

[Dylan Black]

"Blue?" Dylan said derisively, inwardly wondering what sort of a name Blue was. Did he have a sister called Orange and a little brother called Red? "It's fine. He just made shopping for my pet as excruciating as sitting on thumb tacks." And he was privately glad he wasn't the only one who thought the moustache was painfully offensive.

He listened quietly as Leila explained suing, and withdrew his hand to return back to his pocket. "Really?" He said, half interested at the thought of being able to punish one of the ungrateful students for harassment - which he thought happened most of the time. "I get harassed anyway." He muttered, mostly to himself, before dropping the can down into the shopping trolley.

When Leila moved forward, Dylan leant back, looking extremely uncomfortable with closeness. "You know of axolotls?" He asked with an arched eyebrow. That was unusual. "His name is Gillian, I'd have more but I can't fit them in the trailer. Or afford them." He looked sour. Could she see it some time? Someone in his space? He fizzled quietly and decided not to answer.

"I didn't say I got along with people, I just said I avoid harassing people unless they persist in trying to get me to socialise." He said simply, pushing his fingers to the bridge of his nose. What? How was this HIS fault? She fell over like a clumsy idiot and suddenly it was HIS fault? "I need to finish my shopping." He persisted stubbornly, frowning. "If you're really that badly hurt I can take..." He trailed off, giving off a resigned sigh. "I can take you to the doctor. In my car."

[Leila Gold]

"Yes, he tends to do that. Even to the people he actually likes." She gave an exaggerated sigh. "But not to worry, he's got a date now, so he should start acting nicer soon." She grinned manically and clapped her hands in a gleeful expression.

"Oh really? Harassment can be a serious offense. You can ask for restraining orders if they're causing you a lot of problems on a regular basis, and then if they break that you can get compensation. It all depends on how well you know the system, or how well you know someone else who knows the system." She smiled again, this time scheming out possibilities about how to deal with annoying teenagers.

"That's too bad. Axolotls are pretty cool. I saw them in the zoo, and they were pretty nifty. I also really liked the komodo dragons, but my parents wouldn't let me have one of those either. Instead they just got me a horse." She continued walking and shopping, grabbing the last of her necessary items and dropping it into the basket.

"Oh, well, that changes everything," Leila said, rolling her eyes. "Yes, just alienate the only people who bother talking to you. That's a good way to solve your problems."

She brightened when he mentioned taking her to the doctor, though. "Really? You'd do that for me? Oh, that's great! I'd really appreciate it. I have a doctor's appointment today anyway to check on my liver, and I was going to call Cobalt for a ride but if you're willing then that'll just solve everything. Thanks!" And she smiled at him. A huge smile showing far too many teeth.

[Dylan Black]

Dylan looked almost stone-dead shocked when Leila mentioned the cranky old git having a date. "Someone like him gets a date?" He uttered in disbelief. A few moments silence and he cleared his throat. "Didn't seem the type."

"What sort of compensation?" The grumpy man asked, arching an eyebrow. A nice five figure sum would be lovely - he could go live in some secluded house, write his novel and order online shopping so he didn't have to socialise ever again. "If a kid throws fruit at you after she ruins a clean floor, that's harassment, right?" Not that Dylan was anyone to talk, having bludgeoned a fellow shopper with a litre of icecream and several bags of frozen vegetables.

"I like horses." He said rather abruptly, pushing a few further items deep into the trolley and staring down at them. He went quiet for a second as he mentally checked he had everything, then looked over. "Axolotls are very soothing to watch. You could get one now, though, right?" Dylan couldn't have any pets in his parents house, aside from his mother's short fat dog. Some people got all the luck, he thought bitterly.

"I am quite happy being alone, as surprising as that is for the human race to comprehend." He snapped grumpily, helping Leila to the checkout all the same. "I'll be sure to see a psychiatrist over my unnatural desire to not share breathing space with cretins."

But then she was all smiles again, and while Dylan put his items through on one till, he kept an eye on Leila. "Liver?" He muttered to himself as the incessant bleeping drowned out any further mumblings. "It's... fine." He lied. "I'll drop you off at home afterwards. Just don't bleed, vomit or snot on the seats." Then hopefully I will never meet you again and I can return to being antisocial. Fat chance Dylan.

[Leila Gold]

"That's what I said, too. And a lot of people, I think. But you know, I think it's going to be really good for him. All of his friends are quite happy for him, and I think even his family was pretty glad to hear about it." She knew she was using the term "family" fairly loosely, but it seemed a better word than anything to describe the relationship Cobalt had with Elaine and her son.

"Depends on the sort of harassment, and whether it was provoked or not." She thought for a moment. "In your case, it would depend also, I think, on what sort of action you took afterward. And whether or not they would have some sort of case to go up against you. But if this sort of thing happens often, and especially if it keeps coming from one particular person, you could definitely have a case on your hands. Keep it in mind and give me a call next time it happens." She was always interested in new cases, and she suspected it would be fun trying to build a case against a student for harassing a janitor. Not like it would necessarily be hard, just fun compiling evidence. And an excuse to go back to Hammel and check out the old haunts.

"I guess I could. But I already have enough pets, and it wouldn't be fair to any new creature I got. It's better for me not to get something if I can't take care of it anyway, right? Plus, I think Athena would get jealous." Leila had been a bit surprised to think that Dylan also liked horses, and she had taken a moment to think of a good response. "If you like horses, I hear there are some ranches around. You could always go find out if you could borrow a horse or something, and go on a ride. You know how to ride, right?" Leila was not specially trained or anything, but she was a fairly decent rider herself. She had the horrible tendency to believe that if she could do something, everyone could, which tended to just make things more difficult.

"The whole world can't be cretins. You're not a cretin. I'm not a cretin. And if you say I am I will punch you," Leila said cheerfully. "I think you're not giving people enough of a chance." It couldn't actually be possible for someone to be that antisocial, right?

"Oh, don't worry about dropping me off at home. I'm sure I'll be able to find a way there, and I wouldn't ask you to spend an hour waiting for me at my appointment. Not that it will take that long, but really, it's not fair to you. I'm sure your axolotl is going to be missing you. And I promise not to leave anything behind in your car. I'm not in any danger of exploding, at least not anymore. Fit as a fiddle. As long as I take my medicine. Which I have been. So we're okay." She finished checking out and paid. "Great, so, what's the plan, Stan?" And she gave him another one of her bedazzling smiles.

[Dylan Black]

Dylan's response to Leila's enthusiasm about Cobalt's romance was a nonchalant shrug and a frown. "Maybe the guy can get rid of the doormat on his upper lip." He said flatly, pushing his cart with a sigh. He'd just wanted a quiet shop and now he had... this person all friendly trying to make conversation. He was clearly doomed to never be left alone.

"I had just mopped a floor, a dumb kid tripped over a chair and spilt soda all over it." Dylan said bluntly. "I told her to watch her step and she started to hurl fruit at me." He may have omitted the fact he called said girl a heifer, and an elephant footed moron, but then, Dylan didn't deem that particularly important. "I'll bear that in mind." He added, not entirely sure whether he had any plans on contacting this woman after he'd dropped her off at the doctors and gotten out of there. Maybe he could get Vincent in court for being a complete moron who showed him his penis. "What about having someone's genitalia in your face without consenting?" He asked curiously, constructing the perfect idea in his head.

"I guess so." He concluded with a sigh. He'd probably live with animals and no humans if he could have a chance. "I know, there's a ranch for sale up in the mountains, has been for a while." He'd kept an eye on it, in the hope that maybe one day he'd be able to afford it. "One hundred acres of land, stables, nice farmhouse, barn." The janitor sagged a bit then, and he began packing the scanned items into bags. "I can ride. Been a long long time though." Not since the last time he'd been in Spain, in fact, when he was a teenager. Who knows how useless he was now.

When Leila defended the world, Dylan's expression went from mildly approachable to closed off and irritated. "I think people don't deserve much of a chance." He snapped, paying for his items, then picking up both his and Leila's bags out of politeness.

"Are you sure? There's a few bags here." He grumbled, heading out for the car with his arms laden with shopping. Setting them down at the back, he flipped open the boot and took a deep breath. "Get in the passenger seat, I'll load this up and get us going." How did this nice quiet shopping trip turn into him being a taxi service for a clumsy overfriendly woman again? Rolling his eyes, he packed everything into sections - the left for his shopping, the right for Leila's, then pushed his sleeves up. The boot clicked closed and he slid into the drivers seat. "There aren't any other menial tasks you want me to do before we go to the doctors, right?" He asked hopefully, starting the car up.

[Leila Gold]

"Indecent exposure? That's definitely something you can call someone up about. Bring me the details of the case and a statement and we'll see what we can whip up. It won't be as big a deal because you're a guy, not a girl--I know, all that horrible sexism, right?--but he can still get into a lot of trouble." She looked sidelong at Dylan. "It uh, was a 'he', right?"

She couldn't remember hearing about such a ranch, but then, she hadn't exactly been looking. "Sounds nice. About how long do you have left until you can get it?" Money always seemed to be the problem. It was something Leila could feel some sympathy for, but rarely any empathy. She'd never really had too little money.

"If you never give them the chance, you'll never find the people who deserve it," Leila said determinedly as she marched along. She was far too headstrong to give up a fight so easily. She did notice, though, that he was kind enough to grab her groceries, even if he wasn't exactly very careful with them. "Not everyone can be as awful as you seem to think. What you probably need is someone to screen out the losers for you. That way you can find those who are worth your time and ignore those who aren't." It was an idle thought--she knew of no way to actually make that possible.

"No, really, I'm good," she said, popping into the passenger seat even as Dylan loaded up the back. She pulled on her seatbelt and waited happily, bouncing up and down slightly in the seat. "Oh, no, I have gotten all the other menial tasks out of the way. Already went to the laundromat yesterday, did the post office this morning, and I won't have to swing by the library for another week. So I'm all set, thanks for checking." She purposely ignored any and all sarcasm in what he was saying.

"This is a nice car," she said, putting her nose down to the dashboard to inspect it closely. "I've never been much for cars, though. Can I roll down the window?" Her claustrophobia usually didn't kick in so long as she sat in the front, but it was better to be safe and just have the window cracked, just to make sure.

[Dylan Black]

"It was." Dylan responded flatly, with a slight shudder. There was something horribly off-putting about cleaning a bathroom and having an erection pointed at your general direction. "He apparently does it on a regular basis." He smacked his forehead with his palm, eyes rolling, before returning to the task at hand.

He looked a little bitter when Leila asked how close he was to saving to live on said ranch. His face drooped and he folded his arms around himself defensively. "Oh, I'm sure in a century I'll be just about ready." He spat rather contemptuously, though not directed at Leila herself. He had a whopping $1000 in his savings account, and even then a large portion of it seemed to get scrimped off when a bill was higher than he expected.

Still, he said no more on the matter as he finished loading the car up, giving it a little rub with his sleeve to remove a smear from the bonnet as he slipped in. "Oh well." He said to Leila's thoughts. "To be honest I'd be happy just to be left alone." He said simply, turning the key in the ignition and buckling up. "Not that it ever works like that." The janitor added on a low, disgruntled note as they pulled out from the car park.

He did perk at the compliment about the car, and Dylan grinned a bit. "She's beautiful, isn't she. Old style Cadillac Eldorado, got her modernised slightly on the inside for seatbelts and a good radio, but other than that she's pure as the day she was made." He stroked over the steering wheel fondly as they turned a corner, and arched an eyebrow. "I guess so?" Dylan offered simply, not really minding too much.

"So, Doctors then I guess I'll be going." He listed to himself, heading across Pilot Ridge with nothing but the sound of the engine and the wind through the window. "Just uh... don't fall over again." He said, glancing over. "I wont be there next time to be overly nice and out of character. You'll end up with some breeder asking for your number and trying to jump into your crotch." Yes. Dylan really does believe that's all people want.

[Leila Gold]

"Really? Well, then that can definitely be looked into. We can get statements from others and there can be some serious repercussions for that sort of thing. There are laws for a reason, you know." Leila could've jumped for joy, she was so excited to have another case. She loved these sorts of things. Instead she settled for rubbing her hands together maliciously.

"You should think about investing. Have you any experience with the stock market? That's how my parents made most of their money. They started off with just a small house, now we have a ranch down in Texas." Of course, her parents were both specialist doctors and had more money to work with in the first place, but surely the idea was the same, right?

Leila was quiet for a moment as she buckled up. "Well, no. But if you got everything you ever wanted in life, that would be boring. It's the stuff you don't plan for that's more interesting." And she was absolutely determined to be a random element in everyone's life. Everyone. Ever. In the world.

"Thanks." Leila rolled down the window a crack and breathed a quiet sigh of relief as the wind poured over her hair. She smiled. "Yeah, she's gorgeous. I have to get myself a car one of these days. It's just so hard to find one I like. I'm thinking of maybe doing a convertible, though. That way I can leave the top down most of the time."

Leila had to let out a burst of laughter. "Don't worry, I think I can handle myself. I admit the whole 'falling over' bit was a bit strange for me, anyway. Usually I can catch myself as I fall, or at least cushion the fall a bit. And if it helps, I really do appreciate your out-of-characterness. You should try it more often."

As they pulled up in front of the hospital, Leila jumped out of the car. "Thanks for the ride, Dylan. Remember, stop by the office any time and we'll work on getting some of those harassment cases worked out for you." She went around to the back of the car and grabbed her couple bags of groceries, then headed inside the hospital without so much as a limp.