Cold Words [open]

[Jessica Pruitte]

Her feet lead her to the pond where she practically threw herself into a seated position and all but tore her journal open to the next clean page. The pen’s strokes against paper were quick and angry. Feelings put into words that had to get out or they’d consume the writer.

I'm sorry I can’t pretend
or be your baby girl
someone you can look at
and see a better world.
I'm sorry I'm not perfect
someone who is dull
I'm sorry I can’t be the image
of a smiling Barbie doll.
I'm sorry for the words I say
for the thoughts in my mind
I'm sorry I'm not the person
you were hoping to find.
I'm sorry for the way I dress
for the way I style my hair
I'm sorry if you ever thought
I never cared.
I'm sorry for the pain you feel
for the stress of everyday
I'm sorry for the abortion
that never came my way.
I'm sorry for the rain that pours
for the sun that always shines
I'm sorry for all the problems I caused
for the blame is surely mine.
I'm sorry for not smiling
for always looking bad
I'm sorry for all the anger
for making you so mad.
I'm sorry for this poem
for these words I cannot say
I'm sorry for never hoping
for a better yesterday.

There. Done.

It was cold. Bitter cold and Jess was silently cursing herself for not having thought to grab a blanket to wrap up in. At least the wind was almost no-existant and most everyone else didn’t want to be outside because of aforementioned cold, so there was a silver lining. Jess wasn’t at all sure how she’d react to someone else right then. There was just too much going through her head, a combination of her own thoughts and the always-present background information from the Internet streaming through her skull.

Closing her notebook and tucking the pen behind her ear, the teen pulled her knees up, effectively trapping her journal between her thighs and torso. Staring out across the snow covered grounds, she inhaled the frost-bitten air through her nose and exhaled through parted lips to watch the steam it created. Hammel was a wonderful place. There was Stephen, her personal Adonis; people who actually cared about things other than themselves; challenging classes; beautiful school...

And it was possible that it was all going to be taken away. Because her mom felt slighted. Or embarrassed that she’d managed to be gone so long and was more or less called on her lack of parenting skills by the school staff. Not that it would change anything.

“Don’t let me grow up to be like that,” the teen whispered to the wind, each word showing on the cold air, a visual promise that her prayer had been heard. If she believed such things.

[Tom Rever]

Walking was one of the few things tom could do. He walked to clear his head ,get over some of his greatest of pains. It was cold Today thankfully Tom remembered his black coat His new hat fit warmly on his head ,He had gotten it in the mail from his beloved mother he had to remember to write her back."good ol mom" he thought as He bundeled up nice and warm he walked out of the institute with hast wanted to rid his mind of distraction, he started up the trail to the pond thinking of his doubts and his father "Dad" tears in his eyes he walked he felt ever step of the way a sense of libration came to him suddenly ..feeling all his sad thoughts, his worries fade away he looked over to the pond as he seen a woman she looked quiet troubled he thought to himself should he go see what was wrong? he decided after a few seconds of thought to walk over to her and see what was wrong. Tom wasn't much of a compassionate type he was distant and knew how dangerous people were with what his father pulled on him as a child He touched his forearm... But he seen something in this girl . she was troubled and he felt a need to help her. He knew how it felt to be alone and lost in emotions . He walked over slowly to the girl he now stood behind her as he bent over tapped her lightly. He let out a moderate tone "hi" he said He wondered how she would react to someone right now he hoped she wasn't the violent type.

[Jessica Pruitte]

Jess' head snapped up and round, her grip on the notebook tightening out of reflex. Those were her private thoughts. Some steamier than others, but private just the same. The touch wasn't bad, and the tone wasn't threatening, but she hadn't really expected anyone else to be outside braving the temperatures and snow.

"Hey," she answered back, eyes studying the boy's features. Things could easily go one of two ways. Poorly, which was how Jess was inclined to view such situations, or well. The coin had been tossed, there was no telling where it would fall. "Cold day," cautious and wary as she was by her peer's presence, Jess wasn't going to just shove him away. Not yet. She liked it at Hammel and wanted to fit in. Even if that meant not being on the defensive all the time. A task far easier said than done.

No one here had burned her house down, after all.

[Tom Rever]

Looked at her as she looked back as he sighed, a sigh of relief. Not the violent type definitely not the violent type he thought as he proceeded on sitting beside her he felt a chill down is spine as he hoped he was welcome "ya it's cold" He said in a moderate tone, he wondered how long she was sitting there as he turned her attention toward her with curious eyes "when did you decide not to wear a jacket?" He knew she was cold by the way she shook and wondered why she didn't grab a jacket must have been in a hurry he thought , He watched her hands grab something tightly ,he would ask what that was but he figured it was something personal and didn't want to ask her and be screamed at from all her distant emotion. His grey eyes scanned her face of any answers, he waited for her response patiently .

[Jessica Pruitte]

"I just didn't think about it, I guess." And boy was she regretting the lack of thought on that one! It wascold outside and once her initial rage had worn off Jess had really begun to feel the sting of the air. If only her power were something more useful when it came to enduring elements. But no, no such luck was hers to be had. Instead she had web pages, blogs, emails, phone numbers, texts, crap like that going constantly through her head. An interminable flow of information in the back of her mind.

What did he want? Maybe she was reading too much into his expression and searching glance, but Jess definitely felt like he was looking at her like she owed him something.

"Look, do I know you? A class together or something?" It wasn't like she really had all the faces she saw around the school memorized, but it was kind of ridiculous to not at least recognize him. Her bad. Even preoccupied as she was with her mother's motives and actions, it wasn't acceptable for her to not at lest know who he was if they shared subjects.

[Tom Rever]

Looked at her expression as he gave her a did I do something wrong face as he raised his brow "well no , you don't know me but I have seen you around". His facial expression changed as he thought of what he said , he looked from side to side with paranoia he said "I havent been following you or anything i've just seen you around". Tom clasps his hands together as he hopes what he said clarifies that he is not a stalker he looked at her and said in a moderate tone "you are cold so maybe we should go inside" . At times Tom was socially awkward and was sometimes weird but he was here for a reason, she would understand that right? He hoped she would understand that he was trying to help her, and not be creeped out by his explaination on knowing her. (ooc=sorry if its a little short i wrote it on my phone not my element)

[Jessica Pruitte]

Boy, was he jumpy and neurotic. The thought that he was following her hadn't crossed the almost-emo's teen's mind--until he said it. Was he? Was he like Patch, and Evan? Was he going to burn her house down too? Though she didn't have a house now to burn down, but still. He was on her watched list now. Totally to be watched.

"Huh?" Oh, right, she was cold. And it was the truth, but Jess wasn't sure she wanted to go anywhere with Tom anymore. Though being out in the open, by the lake alone with him no longer seemed like the best of ideas. Inside it was then. It was the safest option if dude was a nut-job. "Yeah, let's go in and get something warm. Cocoa with mini marshmallows sounds like an awesome idea." Getting to her feet, Jess brushed the snow off her pants and was dismayed to find a wet spot. Well, what did she expect, snow melted when it met something warm, and she was a living body--which was warm.

"Well hell. Eh, they'll dry. Let's go, shall we?" Looking expectantly at him, Jess arched her eyebrows in an almost-challenge.

[Tom Rever]

Tom nodded to her cocoa with marshmallows idea "sounds good" he said in a moderate tone , he stood to his feet as he dusted himself off , his behind was cold from all that sitting he was happy they had gotten up from that cold ground , he looked at her and looked down at her wet pants he deemed this inappropriate as he looked away and let out a simple "ya" as she said something about her wet pants. He hears a shall we as he looks over to her ,he gives a nod as he says "ya, let's do it" he starts to walk toward the trail ,looks back to make sure she followed as he turned back around and started toward the trail as he did this he started to hum "dummm ...dumm dumm.." Requiem for a dream by Lux Aeternas One of his favorite songs "Modern Classical Music" It was full of emotion and power ,he stomped his feet to accommodate his emotions toward the music as he walks with her back to the school he says suddenly "music is such a gift.." he seemed genuine as he said this. He looks over to her to hear her opinion about music he hoped she felt the same way..When they made it to the school he would ,he decided ask her about her troubles and why she was at the pond was that nosy he asked himself.

[Jessica Pruitte]

Arching her eyebrows at him, Jess couldn't help but smirk. "You're weird, you know that?" As if anyone here was any different. They were all freaks. They'd all been... exiled as it were. Though exile was preferable to home. Sure, there'd been luxuries and whatever she wanted... except parents.

"But yeah, I guess music's a gift, never really thought about it, ya know? Just turn on a radio and go with it. Sing along if I like it, turn the dial if I don't." But she didn't need a radio anymore. Well, she did if she wanted to actually control the music, every now and then her inner 'dial' went to music streaming website, last.fm, or pandora. The music it landed on she couldn't really control, hell she couldn't control where her brain went in the aether. Or how it came to her. However it worked. Whatever.

"What made you bring music up anyway?"