You betta werk werk (Sawyer)

[Roger Vandelay]

Roger loved Sawyer. They were like kindred souls: they knew how to talk shit, didn't take crap from anybody, and were more loyal to their real friends than one might suspect. Frankly, if Roger was a girl, he might be Sawyer. Except for the liking girls thing. That was a non-starter. But other than that, they were totally on the same wavelength.

As such, Roger knew that Sawyer liked music. He also knew that he was virtually surrounded by music whenever he was at the House. Most of his friends having been made at the House (or at Hammel but also working there), it didn't take the bright kid long to decide maybe Sawyer should try working there as well. Not as a dancer of course - dear God, not as a dancer - but blasting some cool tunes for the audience between sets? That was right up her alley.

Just like she liked it.

The brunette was standing outside the House, where he was meeting Sawyer. He'd told her he could get her an 'in' with Cynthia, the owner and hiring authority. But first, he figured he'd show her around the place to give her a feel for whether she actually wanted to work there. It wasn't exactly a match made in heaven, but it could definitely work. The way he saw it, the House could use more... reality, the kind of realness Sawyer could bring to it. Some more modern tunes and all that. Whether Cynthia would go for it remained to be seen, but it was always worth a shot.

And if not, then at least they could have fun making fun of the other performers together.

[Sawyer Lynn]

There was something about Roger that Sawyer just took to immediately. Not only because he was friends with Lucy and whoever Lucy liked, Sawyer liked. Even Evony. Even though that bitch is going down faster than the Titanic. Soon.

He was insane and he could shapeshift into anybody he liked and he used it repeatedly without caring about the consequences. That was...so Sawyer. Had she given a more active ability instead of this stupid voice mimicry, she would use it unabashedly.

As it were, hanging out with Roger was something Sawyer enjoyed anyway. The added bonus of possibly getting an 'in' with a pretty happening Burlesque type joint's owner was just a cherry.

Dressed in her casuals, Sawyer trodded through the town square until he found the familiar shapeshifter. "What up, home skillet." Sawyer grinned and gave him a pat on the arm.

[Roger Vandelay]

Roger was about to text Sawyer asking where she was. She wasn't even late; he just liked to be bothersome, or Rothersome as he liked to call it. Rothering was, of course, when one bothered someone as a Roger might. And Rogers loved to bother.

He didn't get a chance to do this, though, because as soon after he arrived at he House, Sawyer did as well. "Hey girl," he said casually, smiling as the girl bopped him on the arm. "Lez go in." He led the girl through the nondescript door and into the entryway. The entrance was nothing particularly exciting, basically just a hallway with a place for people to check their coats, and enough room for a bouncer to check ID's before people walked into the main room.

The real excitement was through the double doors, which was where Roger took Sawyer next. "So, this is where the magic happens," he explained as he gestured to the gigantic room which contained a bar by the entrance, tables and chairs, and a stage at the front of the room. "That's where all the pretty girls you like do their dancing thing," he explained, pointing towards the stage. "Oh, and some boys. There's a blonde I'm kinda into. It's whatever."

"There isn't really a DJ booth, but like... there should be," he continued. "The music kinda sucks. It's live and jazzy, which is cool I guess, but I never get my dance on." He sounded almost genuinely disappointed. After all, there weren't that many clubs where people his age could go dancing, and when he shifted he didn't really have a fake ID he could use. So his options were fairly limited. "That's why I want you to work here. Oh and so we can have fun times." It was just kind of easier when all of his friends were in the same place.

[Sawyer Lynn]

Following Roger into the building, Sawyer immediately pounced on to Roger's back, clinging on to him by his neck and circling her short legs around his torso.

She looked around and was impressed by how big the place was. She hadn't had much prior experience with these sort of places but she had always imagined it was small and smoky but this place was swanky.

"Well, I could totally just plug in my computer. Works just as well." She shrugged. "Dude this is amazeballs." She commented before finally picking something up. "Wait...backtrack to the blonde. When can I see him?"

[Roger Vandelay]

Oof. Roger had come to expect the unexpected with Sawyer, but she still managed to surprise him - for instance, by accepting a piggyback ride he hadn't offered. "Jesus Christ," he groaned, as he grabbed onto her legs and shifted their positioning so that she was more securely fastened. "You're heavier than I would've thought. Wait, what am I doing?" He asked himself, realizing he was being far too accommodating, before releasing his grip and letting her either fall or do a better job of clinging to him. She wasn't actually heavy, but he was rather weak.

"Yeah, it's pretty awesome," he agreed, hopping up onto the bar - something he would never do while Cynthia was there, but to which he felt perfectly entitled otherwise. "They just renovated it, like, last year. It's more different than I thought. Like the stage is nicer and the floor was replaced and that kinda stuff." Evidently business was doing pretty well for them to be able to afford all that, but he supposed it was an investment in future earnings. "Oh, and backstage is cool, too," he continued, "I'll take you there next." As for the aforementioned blonde, he merely gave a shrug. "If you work here, all the time," he explained. "There's a meeting you have to come to on Sundays, which is fun cuz everyone's there but that's when they tell you what you'll be doing that weekend. Then performances are Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays, but IDK what nights you'd be working."

Hopping down off the bar again, he showed Sawyer into the hallway beside the stage that led to the backstage area. "This is where you'll molest the dancers," he said, pointing to a staircase that led up to off-stage, where set pieces and performers waited to go on. "C'mon, my costume room is back here."

[Sawyer Lynn]

"I am not! Jesus H. Roge. That's an awful thing to say." She feigned hurt and slid off him when he let her go. It didn't take long for her to drop her act and follow him through.

She didn't jump up on the bar though. That was just disgusting. She hoped the cleaned the bar top before tonight. "Oh yes. Where the actual magic happens. So I get to scam on the hot people backstage right?" She smirked. "Wait...that's where they do quick changes right?" Sawyer started snickering.

"Bitch, what is his name. It's like trying to crack the Interpol here." She teased, nudging the shapeshifter a little roughly.

"Perks. I like it." She nodded, liking the idea of working here even more. Following Roger, she kept her eyes wandering. Need to familiarise herself if she wanted to get the job, she thought.

"These naked ladies are wasted on you, Roge."

[Roger Vandelay]

Of course it was an awful thing to say; that was kind of Roger's thing. He said what he thought and meant what he said; you always knew where you stood with him because, really, life was too short to keep secrets.

"Right," Roger confirmed with a nod. The way he saw it, these bitches were hired for their looks, so he was going to take advantage when warranted (i.e. when said bitch was male). The shapeshifter believed he was the one with the real talent, since he was responsible for making their clothing, which took legitimate skill and effort.

They were still standing in the backstage hallway, just off to the side of the stage, when Sawyer asked for the boy's name. "It's not important," he deflected as he pulled the girl by the hand back towards the costume room. And really, it wasn't: Tanner was a hottie, and he could sing, but Roger was far from crushing on him or anyone else. As previously mentioned, they were just eye candy, these performers. "Thursday night is Ladies' Night, which means it's my night, cuz that's when all the hunky guys perform." Ooh baby, he liked Ladies' Night.

"Aaand here's where I get to feel people up," he said as they at last reached the costume room. "Feel free to look at all the crazy bras." He hopped up onto the sewing table, feet dangling under him; evidently he liked being perched up in high places. "You probably wouldn't be wearing any crazy costume, since you'd be doing things backstage or wherever. But it's fun to look at. Oh and it's especially fun coming up with a blatantly ridiculous idea, and having Cynthia actually like it, and then everyone has to wear it."

[Sawyer Lynn]

Sawyer took no offence at all at Roger's thing. They could both take what they dish out. It was their whole dynamic.

"Righteous." The voice mimic chuckled as she thought of all the ways she coud harrass the dancers. Although, she probably wouldn't, seeing as sexual harrassment was apparently the wrong thing to do at work.

She saw the deflection and she did not want to quit. So she smacked him up the head. "Bitch, names are always important. Have you not learned anything from Death Note?" She asked of him with a mock glare.

"Of course they have Ladies Night but...wait...so these guys just come over, dressed in loinclothes and shake what their mamas gave them?" Sawyer asked, her eyes already glazing at the image.

Once in the sewing room, Sawyer hopped all over the place, poking this and stroking that. "Half of these probably cost more than my whole wardrobe. And they're just pieces of cloth strung together. Flimsily I might add."

Turning at the mention of her potential boss, Sawyer tilted her head. "Is that what she's like? Nuts?"

[Roger Vandelay]

It certainly wasn't the right thing to do, which was why Roger, as surprising as this may seem, barely ever did it. He was almost startlingly professional when he was really working - not just bitching with his friends, but really working - because he knew Cynthia had a close eye on costumes and needed everything to look good, and that if she suspected him of doing anything too sketchy, she'd yell at him. So he was mostly joking about feeling people up, with the exception of when his fitting with Lucah got accidentally intimate, and he maintains that was mostly an accident.

He flinched as Sawyer hit him. "Hey, geez!" He cried, "I don't know your stupid Chinese shows." He really had no idea what it was - well, he knew enough to know it was some kind of Asian cartoon, but he'd never seen it. And while he vaguely recalled that China and Japan were not the same country, China was bigger so it just made more sense to use that word. "Maybe you'll meet him for yourself - if you're lucky," he added, again deflecting the question. He didn't want anyone - especially someone who might hold it against him like Sawyer - knowing he was into someone. That messed with his mystique.

Swinging his legs back and forth as he sat on the sewing table, Roger watched Sawyer as she began poking around. "Well, loincloths is a bit of an exaggeration," he explained. "It depends on the performer. A lot of the guys play an instrument or sing or something. Cynthia makes sure they wear just little enough to get the women through the front door." She was actually kind of brilliant for having started this ritual, Roger thought, and what he didn't realize was that it was in fact the blonde boy he kind of liked who had thought of it.

He sneered at the 'flimsy' remark, knowing it to be a typical Sawyer Jab and not letting it anger him. He was damn good at what he did, though. "I didn't think you knew anything about clothes," he mused aloud, "I mean, you certainly don't look like you do." He gave an innocent, almost sweet smile as he delivered this.

When asked about his boss, Roger had to take a moment. "How do I answer this..." he pondered aloud. "I mean, kinda? She thinks she's French but she's not. So, there's your answer. She's nice, though. And smart. Like smarter than you'd think looking at her." He shrugged. "I mean, she was smart enough to hire me, so..." he added as though that supported his claim.

[Sawyer Lynn]

At Roger's exclamation, another back of the head hit came from Sawyer, for not knowing a pretty damn good comic. "You're an asshole. An uncultured asshole." She glowered before chuckling. "Yeah I will. I'd probably get with him before you do. You know my sexiness is hard to resist." She hip thrusted the air in his general direction.

"So your boy is a performer?" She asked with a grin. "Mm..." She wriggled her eyebrows at the shapeshifter and gave him a shit-eating grin. "Singer I bet." She added before making a fist and pushing her tongue against the inside of her cheek. "Microphones man..." she chuckled and placed a dress back on the shelf.

"Aww, was that supposed to hurt me, Vandelay?" Sawyer pouted condescendingly and patted the other meta's head. "So cute." She made a shivering move like it was too much for her and chuckled.

Listening to his description of Cynthia, Sawyer had to chuckle. Faux French, that was new. "I would think that would discredit her from your praises." She smirked. "Well, she did get the idea to form this joint. Scantily clad girls rubbing up against each other with drinks and good music... Pretty solid strategy." Sawyer shrugged and bounded over to the couch and laid down on it.

"So like...how's the pay? Is it good money?"

[Roger Vandelay]

Roger was getting all the hits today, and he wasn't exactly happy about this. "Hey, watch it," he warned as he flinched a second time. "I'm like a banana, I bruise easily." He might've said 'housewife,' but he wasn't feeling that off-color that afternoon. It seemed he was reigning himself in a teensy bit at a time day by day. Evidently growing up would do that to a person.

"He's not mine," he countered quickly, though the smile on his face showed he wasn't getting too serious about this. "Yeah, he sings," he agreed with a shrug; he didn't want Sawyer getting the wrong idea about just how much he was into Tanner; he was a cute guy who was kinda talented, nothing more. Hot guys were a dime a dozen around these parts, and this one was no different. Besides, if anyone was going to be doing what Sawyer was pantomiming...

Roger shook his head. "Well, she actually kinda makes it work. It's sick. Like, she walks around in high fashion and her diva voice and everyone falls to their knees. I wish I had that kinda power. Usually I'm the one one my- well, you get the idea." It never took long for any of Roger and Sawyer's conversations to become sexual.

"The pay is... secondary," he said, before laughing. "I mean, we're all basically part-timers, since performances are only Thursday to Saturday, so it's not like you could make a living." He shrugged. "I think she uses most of the revenue from one week to pay for next week's costumes and all that stuff." He hopped down off the table finally, walking over to the touch and sitting on her legs. "I mean think of the experience," he continued, "like you have something on your resume and all that. And you get to hang out here with me and these other basic bitches." What more could a gal want? "Oh, and the eye candy, but we've discussed that haven't we."

[Sawyer Lynn]

"That's why it's so fun to hit you though. And I'm calling you that from now on. Bruised Banana." She responded before laughing. "Like Bruce Banner, except you're yellow and you're the one that gets bruised." Sometimes, Sawyer cracked herself up.

The voice mimic chuckled at his response but said nothing else. She would let him have his moment.

"She look good in tights?" Sawyer asked of Cynthia, not even sure what response she was expecting.

Shrugging, Sawyer started playing with the hem of Roger's shirt when he sat down on her. "I guess the perks are there. I'll have to find a day job then." Sawyer hummed a little. "So when do I get to meet this Not-French Lady Boss of yours?"

[Roger Vandelay]

Roger sighed. Great, now Bruised Banana was his nickname. Hey, at least he felt better now about not calling himself Bruised Housewife. He had a feeling that wouldn't go over well with a wider audience.

"Tights?" the boy repeated incredulously, eyes narrowing and eyebrows furrowing as though he literally could not understand what had possessed her to ask such a question. "What is she, a middle school gymnastics student?" He shook his head. "She's older. I mean, she's definitely pretty, but older. So unless you like-a da cougars..."

Once he was sitting on his friend, he let his legs dangle underneath him, smiling as Sawyer began playing with the edge of his shirt. In a lot of ways, he was still a rambunctious child at heart, and he did like his physical affection. Punches, of course, did not count.

"Oh, um, we can go find her now," he said, hopping up off her more forcefully than was necessary in the hopes of eliciting an 'oof' sound. "She's probably here. She's always here. Just... humor her, and you'll be fine."

[Cynthia DeMato]

Coincidentally, it was right when Roger decided to go find Cynthia that Cynthia decided to go find Roger. She had been sitting in her office taking care of some financial business - she found she spent more of her day doing that than she ever wanted - but decided to put that all away for now and focus on the upcoming shows. There was still a day or two left, but she wanted to make sure everything was going as planned. Set construction wasn't going to commence until that afternoon, and the dancers were in the process of learning their choreography with Mel, which meant that the only thing she could really micro-manage at that moment was costumes.

She pushed her chair away from her desk, standing up and heading out of her office. She was wearing a simple black dress which contrasted nicely against her fair skin; her curly black hair was tied back in a neat bun, and her face was made up like she was doing something much more interesting than working. Reading glasses sat on her nose, which she no longer needed now that she was up but liked the way they looked on her. On her way out of her office, she grabbed one of three shiny black walking sticks resting by the door.

"Roger~" She sang out, heels clicking down the hallway before she turned into the costume room. "Oh," She said, noticing that Roger was in there with a guest. "I'm sorry, I don't believe we've met." She listened as Roger introduced them, giving a polite smile to the girl who was plainly dressed before extending a nail-polished hand. "Well, it's a pleasure to meet a friend of Roger's," she greeted.

[Sawyer Lynn]

"Hey, don't diss gymnastics, you little fucker." Sawyer began to throw him a punch but restrained, not wanting to bruise the gentle banana. "Hey, cougars are where it's at right now, man. Hot sexy older women...unf."

The physical affection was becoming a norm for Sawyer, getting used to it because of Lucy. All those times pretending to be girlfriends, she grew accustomed to it and now actually found any excuse to be near people.

'Oof'ing at Roger's movement, Sawyer smacked him in the ass and started to get up when a tall pretty woman in her late thirties sauntered in. Roger was not kidding, the faux French was strong in this one. But damn, was she hot or what.

Sawyer took the offered hand and kissed it with a grin. "Enchante madammoiselle." She let go of her hand and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "The pleasure is all mine. I'm Sawyer Lynn, by the way. And you must be Cynthia?"