Time Warp: Who Would've Thought? (Clement)

[Clement Evans]

It wasn't too hard to microwave soup or Spaghetti-Ohs or make sandwiches, so Clement never worried when Jess had the helm at the kitchen. He knew where his strengths were, and if things really got out of hand, he had several pizza delivery place numbers memorized.

And no, the pizza cake discussion was never going to go away.

Additionally, as long as Jesse Adams lived in the house he shared with Clement, he was not having one.

Daddy had to laugh at Dad's attempt to defend himself. Not because of what was said (which was debatable) but because it looked so much like when Gabby said the exact same thing. Usually after being asked after being mischievous if she could behave herself before consequences were carried out.

Oh sure. Funny for them. Clement had had to do a lot of apologizing and a lot of fast talking to keep from being asked to leave and maybe not come back for awhile. Once Gabby and Joey had started up, the other kids at the park got into it too and the whole thing devolved into all the dog walkers leaving and the parents left with children hyped up in excitement, all running around screaming and barking. Clement had dry swallowed a pair of Excedrin once he got home and had ordered the kids in his Voice That Meant Business to watch Sesame Street quietly or they'd be napping early and at length after lunch. Still, he smiled and shook his head. Kids were kids.

The pet question was one asked off and on with the regularity of most other kids, though theirs weren't as adamant about begging as some were. Almost all kids wanted a pet at some point, but neither daughter or son was old enough to really care for one and it would ultimately just mean more work for the adults.

"A doggie is a lot of work, Gabs," Clement said. "And you have to always be nice to a doggie. When Dad and I think you and Joe are old enough to learn how to treat a pet right, we'll talk about it, okay?"

Joey could be a sharp little bugger when he wanted to be. Still hopeful, he looked at both dads and said, "We have cow?"

Clement laughed at that. "Sorry Joey. You have to be even older to have a cow. Besides, Moo would get jealous. Okay, what else can we ask Dad? Remember?"

"Dad have fun?" Joey asked, getting most of a potato into his mouth. Another standard question, what everyone had done that was fun that day.

[Jesse Adams]

Hey. Pizza cake was magic, thank you very much. Jesse would find a way to get one eventually. He didn’t care how much begging and bartering it would involve. He would have one.

Jesse could only imagine how not-fun it would be to have the kids barking at the dogs at the park. Clement probably handled it ten times better than he would have. Which... in truth might have been simply declaring that park time was over and hauling both of them up and over his shoulders until they were a good enough distance from the park that the kids could be trusted walking again without running back.

Yeah, Clement probably handled it better.

A lot better.

Honestly, Jesse couldn’t wait for the kids to be old enough to respect a pet. Sometimes he debating just how long that might be, especially with the way they sometimes treated their plush toys. Though she’d heard the lecture before, Gabby still crossed her arms and pouted slightly.

“I’m nice! Always!” Except when Joey was getting into her things when she didn’t want him to, or when the super pretty but snotty girl at preschool went around acting like the best thing ever. Or when she didn’t want to do something like nap. But other than that she was nice! She was!

“I know, Gabs,” Jesse reassured her. “But doggies are a lot of responsibility. You have to walk them and feed them and look after them.” Gabby gave him a look that said, in toddler speak, ‘not fair’, but she knew better not to voice it. It wasn’t worth getting in Trouble for. Instead she just turned her attention back to dinner and sighed in a somewhat dramatic way.

Ohhh Jesse was looking forward to the teenage years with her.

Joey’s question did give the blond man pause for a moment. His job was a lot of things, but fun... really wasn’t up there a lot of the time. At worst it was depressing and stressful, and at best? Well, good things did happen, but it was hard not to get discouraged when his office felt like it was wallpapered with case reports to follow up with that weren’t always nice to read. It was because of this that he had to be incredibly careful with what he said at home around the kids, and sometimes even to Clement.

He speared a potato as he thought about his answer. It hadn’t been an awful day, all told. And there had been a little bit of fun. “Well. This afternoon a few of us took a break and played a few card games.” Sometimes it was needed in the office, especially if someone needed a break from a particularly difficult case. What he left out was that they had been betting office supplies, because gambling wasn’t really a topic to discuss around the kids, even in fun. He had won a pretty nice pen, though. And a ton of paperclips.

[Clement Evans]

Yeah, if there was going to be pizza cake, and Clement had little doubt that eventually there would be, it was not going to be in the house. Just thinking about it (while admittedly the writer part of him admired the creativity) gave him a migraine.

Honestly, once all the apologizing had been done, Clement had done a version of that. He'd firmly taken one little hand in each of his own and walked home, dragging when he had to and not listening to any of the shrieked pouting or apologies. He'd spent part of the afternoon explaining why it wasn't nice to do what they did, and telling them if they ever did that again that they'd be staying home for a good while till they could behave themselves.

Daddy wasn't quite as enthused about their eventual pet as the kids and Dad were, even though he'd enjoyed Ty a great deal. Pets were great when he and Jess had been dating or before they'd had kids, but now... even a fish would be a lot of work. For him. "Pets need a special kind of nice you learn when you're older," he said. "And you have to be that kind of nice to them all the time, even if they're naughty. What would you do if the doggie chewed on Fishy, Gabby?"

Jesse, he knew, was chomping on the bit to get a dog, and Clement wished he could, in good conscious, say yes. A lot of families bigger than theirs with kids in the same age range had a dog, even had multiple pets. But their kids just had the wrong combo of personality and age, and it wasn't often they used a sitter or otherwise got extra help.

Since the kids, Clement had been able to find good even in the worst days, when both kids were sick with the flu and had unspeakable things coming out both ends and cried incessantly. Even fun things. Like with the aforementioned situation (which had happened more than once, and more than four times) he'd learned he was capable of not throwing his hands up and releasing the kids into the wild.

"Go fiss!" Though he was too young to play properly, Joey'd watched Daddy and Gabby play with the picture card set of Go Fish and Old Maid. Clement didn't do the whole 'let the kids win' thing... okay, he did sometimes if he'd won three times in a row... but Gabbers was catching on quickly. He hadn't thought he'd particularly enjoy playing kids games like those easy card games and Memory, Candy Land, and Chutes and Ladders, but it was surprisingly relaxing. Likely because it required so little thought.

"We had fun too. We went on the slides and the swings, and who was on Sesame Street today, Joey?"

"Bi' Bir'!" Clement was unreasonably proud of their son for liking the classic yellow bird over Elmo. God, he hated Elmo. "Tell Dad how you did my hair before nap, Gabs. It was real nice."

[Jesse Adams]

One day Jesse would realize that his metabolism was not the same as it had been when he was a teenager. He could not even attempt inhaling pizza like he had at that age without starting to feel a little ill now. Grease hangovers were terrible things as an adult. Saying that, he still wanted to conquer a pizza cake. Even if it took him a week to do it. The thing was genius.

Jesse had always admired the calm manner in which Clement so often dealt with their kids. Though Jesse had absolutely zero desire to be like his father in any way, shape, or form, he also found it difficult to keep his cool sometimes when the two of them were running around like lunatics and not listening. It was those times he was grateful that Clement knew him so well. He always seemed to know when to step in and when things were okay. The blond was trying to get better, really, he was, but sometimes the kids made that difficult, to say the least.

Gabby considered the question her Daddy posed to her, sticking a piece of roast in her mouth as she thought. “Uummm... say BAD DOGGY. MY FISH.” The idea of Fishy being chewed on by anyone was sad enough, though she’d caught Joey once or twice with the plush fish in his mouth. Jesse knew better, however. He was sure there would be yelling and waterworks and quite possibly a full meltdown if a dog chewed on Fishy. Not a good combination at all. Maybe when the kids were closer to ten or so, then they could look at getting a dog. Or hell, a cat. Something.

Jesse grinned at Joey’s take on cards. “Yeah, like Go Fish.” Only the adult version. Hey, poker was fun. And a stress relief. The game was familiar to Jesse, mostly because he and his brother had played it many times before he’d been carted off to Hammel. Despite the fact he didn’t talk much to Keith, his older brother was still responsible for a lot of the better memories he had growing up.

“And the Yip Yips!” Gabrielle had a real love for the Yip Yip Martians, mostly because they were colorful and looked so soft. They were funny, too. “Daddy had barrettes ALL over! Even the sparklies ones!” She had gone to town with the barrettes, mostly because Daddy had let her. It wasn’t as easy as it was to do Dad’s hair because it was shorter, but she’d done her best. “Daddy was so pretty.” Jesse couldn’t hide his smile as he glanced at his husband.

“Daddy’s always pretty.”

[Clement Evans]

Clement thought the thing that would make Jesse realize he wasn't sixteen anymore would be the first time he paunched out. Seeing a bit of belly hanging out was a great motivator. And it would, more than anything else, be concrete evidence Clement could point to. Not that he wouldn't love Jess if he was overweight, but there were wake up calls and there was needing bigger pants.

Daddy wasn't exactly overly calm when it came to the kids, it had more to do with the fact that he had more self control and logic. It made no sense to get mad at toddlers who didn't know why a thing had to be a certain way, and he was there not to be their friend but see that they grew up knowing how to behave. In a way, Clement treated the kids more like small adults than children, explaining, demonstrating, and expecting them to do what he said. And of course, sometimes he wished Gabby and Joey were anywhere other than in front of him too.

Clement couldn't help a snort at his daughter's answer. Yeah right. She'd totally done that when Fishy had been caught in other compromising positions. Uh huh. Daddy was pretty sure he hadn't recovered all of his hearing from that first time Joey had teethed all over the orange plush. "The doggy wouldn't understand what you said, Gabby," he said. "And doggies don't do well with being scolded. They start seeing you as someone who yells at them. So you'd have to take it away gently, and keep Fishy somewhere the doggy couldn't get it. It would be your responsibility, not the dog's."

Yeah, he'd done research. It wasn't surprising, that animals raised on positive reinforcement were easier to train than those taught on the other end. When would people give up the idea that cats and dogs understood what was said to them? For a first pet, Clement thought maybe a pet that the kids could only see and not touch, like a fish or a gerbil. Cleaning a small tank wouldn't be too bad.

The yip yips were another favorite of Clement's, they were awesome. "Tookie Mons'er!" cried Joey. (Clement also thought the whole 'eating healthy' Cookie Monster was total bogus. Kids knew cookies weren't good for them. Duh.) "Drover!"

...Yes. He'd had so many barrettes in his hair he'd made clicking noises every time he moved his head. He hadn't realized Gabby even owned that many barrettes. It was kind of ridiculous.

Smirking over at Jesse, he said, "Everyone is pretty all the time. Uh. When they have clean faces. Lemme help you, Joe."

Eating contentedly, their son had pot roast gravy smeared all over his face and... in an ear, and in his hair, and... jeez, on his shoulder? Clement gave the kid a preemptive wipedown and handed him his tiny blunt fork... after wiping that off too. God. Kids could be so gross. He laughed a little though.

Dinner was over not long after that, and Clement took cleanup to settle his mind down for the work he'd have a bit later. Jesse was on kid patrol that evening, so Clement could get some work done. It was bath night, so that would help. Or... not. Clement thought people with kids needed at least one bathroom that was like a morgue, with a drain in the floor.

The leftover roast was packed into containers, dishes in the washer, table and chairs wiped. He shut the lights out and took his cold coffee out of the fridge, and went into the living room to drop a kiss on each forehead. "Daddy has to work now. You all be good."

"Dad too?"

"Especially Dad. You guys make sure he behaves." Up the stairs and down the hall to his office, Clement did a few stretching exercises as he turned on soft music. Kpop. Sue him. Sitting down at his desk, he fired up his laptop and took out his notes.

[Jesse Adams]

Jesse was going to avoid the dreaded paunch for as long as physically possible. When he could, he still ran to keep himself in shape. Not to mention running after the kids. How anyone could paunch out when trying to keep up with two active toddlers was beyond him. He just... had to try to remember to actually make time to run when he did indulge in treats like pizza and pretended he had teenage metabolism still.

A large part of Jesse’s child raising tactics involved avoiding the hell out of acting like his father. It was this hesitance that sometimes backfired on him. He really didn’t want to be too hard on them, and he never, ever wanted to lay a hand on them beyond dragging them by the hand or bodily carrying them away from something they were going after that was a bad idea. Sometimes he thought they took advantage of that, but by then Clement was usually intervening. It was a learning process.

Gabby pouted over the idea of keeping Fishy out of a doggy’s way. Doggies were supposed to know better than to chew on Fishies! At least in her toddler logic. (Yeah, that had worked oh so well when her brother had teethed all over her fish with his gross wet mouth.) Maybe a doggy wasn’t the best idea. She’d advocate for a fish, if only because fish were pretty.

And yes, it would be named Fishy too.

At least most of the rest of dinner was fairly peaceful, save for the traditional mid-meal wipedown of the kids. Thank God Gabby was starting to get the whole ‘food in mouth, not on face’ thing. Sure, with some things she still made a gigantic mess that left Jesse wondering at what point it would stop, but at least tonight 95% of her meal was going where she wanted it.

While Clement dealt with dinner, Jesse gave both kids a proper post-dinner wipedown before setting them both on the ground again, shooing them into the living room to keep them out of the road. He was used to being on kid patrol while Clement worked. As long as they were receptive to bath time, things would go fine.

“We’re always good,” he assured his husband before turning back to the kids. “Okay guys. We’ve got...” He glanced at his watch. “Half an hour to play before bath time.” Gabby pulled a face.

“Do we hafta?”

“Yes, we have to.” Gabby made another face before heaving a dramatic sigh. Baths were not her favorite activity. Mostly because Fishy couldn’t go in the bath too, despite being a fish. (Though Fishy hated his own baths. As per Gabby.)

Once the half hour was up, Jesse managed to convince Gabby to get in the bath by bribing her with her princess rubber ducks. As long as Joey had his cow toys in the bath, he was generally a happy camper. The kids were allowed to run wild in the hall (but absolutely not in Daddy’s office) while Jesse readied the bath, swirling bubbles and toys in the warm water before catching both kids and helping them into the tub. Fishy and Moo were put back in their bedrooms for when they were done and clean.

As per usual, the floor was hit with more water than necessary. The knees in Jesse’s jeans were thoroughly soaked as the kids flailed around and splashed, giggling the whole time. By the time they were done, Jesse’s arms were soaking wet, he had bubbles in his hair, and went handprints all over his shirt. Once each kid was dry, he deposited Gabby in her room wrapped in her butterfly towel. “PJs, Gabs.”

“Can we watch Rapunzel before beeeeeed?” Jesse sighed and looked at the clock. Well, they just had time. If they started it fast enough.

“Okay. But get in the PJs first.” Joey was then carried to his room, where he was gently sat on his bed. Gabby was quite capable of choosing and putting on her own PJs. Joey... was a different story. After a few moments of looking, he located a set of cow PJs and helped Joey into them. “Gabby wants to watch Rapunzel, so we can play with the cows for a bit before bed, okay? Or color some more.” As long as Joey wasn’t running around like a banshee, he was okay with whatever.

Gabby went tearing down the hall, Fishy dangling precariously by his tail, and thundering down the stairs at warp speed. One of these days she was going to kill herself doing that, and Jesse didn’t know if it was going to be a panic moment, or an ‘I told you so’ one. Really, it depended on what happened.

With Joey on his hip, Moo carried by an arm, the boys made their way downstairs and once Joe was on the floor, Jesse went about setting up the DVD for them. Gabby happily curled on the couch with her soft purple blanket, Fishy tucked against her side. “We’re going to stay quiet, right guys?” Clement had probably had enough noise interruptions between bathtime and Gabby sounding like an elephant on the stairs. “Daddy’s working, so shhh.” Gabby gave him a devious look, pressing her fingers to her lips and imitating him.

“Shhhhhhhhhh Dad.” Giggles. “Daddy’s wooooorking.” Jesse rolled his eyes, used to her sass but not willing to turn it into a fight at this point.

“No copying, Gabs. Watch your movie.”

[Clement Evans]

While Clement understood Jesse's mindset when it came to parenting, he sometimes felt that in order to avoid being his father he went a bit too far the other way. Luckily, Clement was more practical and wanted good behavior more than kids who always liked him. He was more than willing to be the bad guy and didn't mind if Jesse took the other end.

Another thing that concerned him was how much emphasis Gabby sometimes put on being 'pretty'. Of course, she was four, and wasn't able to grasp the finer points of discrimination and why that attitude was... not wrong, but very limiting. Clement did his best to make sure she (and Joey) understood that being attractive was not the be all and end all of everything, and that people could be hurt by saying things of the sort. The whole princess thing also frustrated him a little, but he figured it was a phase almost every little girl had at some point. It was a good thing Joey was so flexible and liked a lot of the general same things as his sister, since she was so dominant. He liked shiny, sparkly things, so he was cool with the glittery barrettes and various other princess attire, and most of the Disney princess movies also featured animal characters he could enjoy.

For the most part, Clement tried to make things for meals that the kids couldn't destroy furniture or their parents' sanity with, but he tried to keep things varied and expose the kids to new foods and not let them stick up their noses. So far they'd been pretty good with it, as long as he presented it as a sort of adventure.

Anyway. Clement went upstairs to his small but rather packed (but neat!) office and began on a translation project. The book deals more than covered his living expenses, but translation stuff was more reliable. Coming from poverty, Clement took everything he could and saved religiously. Two college educations and two retirements, plus the emergency fund.

Joey was more than okay with baths, he loved the water. Which was occasionally a problem. Unlike Gabby, he cheered. "YAY BATH!"

In the tub, the little boy played happily with his plastic animals and cow bath mitt, laughing at the bubbles and when Dad ran the washcloth over his arms and legs. Neither kid was old enough for swimming lessons, but in the summer the adults hauled out the kiddie pool for them to splash around in. Just a few weeks ago Joey had learned that kicking his feet made the best splashes. So it was a miracle Jesse didn't end up completely soaked.

Snuggling and yawning a little as he was carried into his room, Joey helped as much as he could to get dressed. Doing it himself was still beyond him, but he was getting closer. He wrinkled his nose at the mention of Rapunzel. For a three year old, the kid had a more than decent attention span, but ninety minutes was still asking a bit much. Plus, it was a princess movie. "B'ocks, Dad. Make Moo house."

Downstairs, Joey padded over to the shelf and pulled out the fabric bin that held the large collection of colored wooden blocks. Spilling it over, he sat Moo in the middle and began stacking blocks around him. Occasionally he looked over to the TV to see parts he liked. Cars were soon introduced to the Moo house, and then he had to make his plane fly around, and then the plane needed a house too. By the time the movie was over, Joey was yawning every five minutes.

Dad helped him put his toys away and the kids trooped up to bed. There were last potty trips, drinks of water, tooth brushing, nightlights flicked on, hugs and kisses. Joey was tucked in first, under his train sheets, and then Gabby. In roughly an hour, the house was quiet, as if two miniature Acts of God did not live under the roof.

Staying up late was inadvisable while cohabiting with a pair of ruthless early risers who did not hesitate to leap out of bed to share the joys of the new day with their parents. Clement knew that in ten or twelve years he'd have his revenge when he got up at seven and roused his children, who'd rather sleep till noon, but that seemed like an awfully long time from now.

As he had at Hammel and then in college, Clement had learned to write in concentrated bursts. They were very productive as long as he wasn't interrupted, and they felt good. To get out his creative energy and stretch his natural talents, to be himself after a long day of child-wrangling that at this stage was not unlike cattle wrangling. Clement loved being a dad, loved being a husband, but sometimes he wished he had more time to write, and more alone time with Jesse.

Finally, at ten thirty he filed his notes, backed up his laptop, checked the next day's schedule, and took a shower. He'd gotten into the habit of showering at night at Hammel, when most of the kids showered in the morning. Now it worked better when only one of them bathed at either end of the day. If they were both getting ready at the same time, horrible things could happen.

In a t-shirt and boxers, Clement ran his hands through his drying hair and walked around till he found Jesse. Smiling, he draped his arms about his husband's shoulders and gave him a kiss. "How'd it go?"

[Jesse Adams]

Not really having a good example for what ‘Dad’ really meant growing up, Jesse had agonized over how he would actually handle having kids, and once Gabby had been born, he’d had a bit of a panic attack. What if the tendency to abuse really was genetic? What if he was bad at it? What if she hated him? What if he did something wrong and she turned out like him, or like her Uncle Keith? Trying to find that balance of guiding and friendship was still an uphill battle, but at least by the time Joey had arrived he hadn’t been completely panicked anymore.

That being said, he still got nervous from time to time. Especially when the kids were acting up.

Thankfully, tonight was not one of those nights. Both of them went to bed without a fight, and once the peace and quiet settled over the house, he dropped onto the couch and took a moment to just enjoy it. He loved his family, his kids, but a quiet house was definitely a bonus at the end of a long day.

When he heard the shower start, he flipped the television on to the local news to wait for Clement. He’d be done soon enough, and then they could finally have some one on one adult time.

Once Clement joined him, Jesse relaxed further and kissed him back. “It was good. Nobody drowned in the bath, though Joey still thinks kicking water is hilarious.” One hand came up to gently toy with his husband’s damp hair. His own was still semi-damp from the bath incident. “Gabby watched Rapunzel, Joey was making Moo a block house... block mansion, really, and then I took them to bed. They actually went down okay tonight.” There had been no whining for extra anythings, no sudden desires to pee one last time, and no begging for snacks before they went to sleep. “What about you? How did work go?” Unlike his own line of work, Clement’s wasn’t so... closed door about certain things.

[Clement Evans]

As someone with just as terrible an experience with male caregivers as his husband, Clement was less given to getting worked up over 'what if's and more used to doing research. Fact of the matter, just due to raging cases of puberty, both kids would eventually declare their pure, unadulterated, unequivocal hatred of them both. And if Gabby ended up like Jesse or his brother, it wouldn't be because she'd been raised without love or teaching. A lot of kids had a wild phase.

Settling on the couch beside his husband after their kiss, Clement grinned a little. "I don't think we've seen the last of that. I just tell him that now is not kicking time, it's washing time, and he can kick after I'm done. Sometimes it even works."

Of the Disney princesses, Clement preferred Mulan, Pocahontas, Tiana, and Sleeping Beauty. The first three were hard workers and clear goals, and the fourth at least had a prince who had to do something to get his girl instead of just being in the right place at the right time with available lips. Glancing at the news without really seeing it, he said, "They played hard today. After nap we took a long walk. The wooded path. So there'd be no dogs."

Yawning himself, Clement leaned forward to stretch his hands over his head till he heard something in his back click. Ahhhh. So good. "I finished off a translation and scribbled out a few rough chapters." Thinking, he laughed a little. "Next time we have a three day weekend I should let you have the kids while I write. I bet you'd make it eight whole hours before breaking down."

[Jesse Adams]

Really, by this point Jesse should have been able to relax a little when it came to their kids. Though he'd privately admit to wanting to list them on eBay every so often when they were being downright unreasonable, he'd never had the inclination to hit either or them, nor push them beyond their capabilities or call their best attempts at something 'not good enough.' For all the fears he'd had for so long about the remote possibility of being like his father... so far they'd all proved wrong. Still, he worried a little. Sometimes a lot, depending on the situation. Especially if he'd just come off of a tough case that pressed all the wrong buttons. Those days he wanted nothing more than to come home and pull both of their kids into hugs and never, ever let them go.

"Why don't I think of things like that?" Jesse shook his head in amusement. Sometimes kids were so simple. "But no one drowned, so we were good." Hopefully bath time would eventually be less of a watery soap opera with all the drama that went on half the time, and more of a quick, peaceful thing. Well. He could dream.

Half the time Jesse tuned out the Disney princess movies that played, mostly because while they kept Gabrielle entertained, Joey preferred playing or coloring. With his attention split, he often spent more time keeping Joey where he could see him. Especially with his water fascination. (It had to be a phase, and it had to end soon. For everyone's collective sanity.) Still, he'd always liked things like The Lion King growing up. The fact that Simba's father had been killed in it... well... he hadn't really been that sad over it. Much to his mother's dismay. But he liked The Lion King, and he was warming up to things like Mulan. "Hopefully they were good on the walk. No picking up gross things or running off?" It was things like that that made him feel bad about working full time. It felt like he missed a lot with the kids. At least he tried to make up for it in the evenings and weekends.

At least his time with the kids tonight had allowed Clement to be productive. Grinning, he gently elbowed his husband. "Hey, is that a challenge? I can totally make it longer than eight hours without breaking down. Or listing them on eBay." ... Okay, he was pretty sure he could handle it.

[Clement Evans]

While Clement didn't get the eBay urge, he had thought a time or two about FreeCycle. And he also knew (more through research and then careful observation) that there was nothing that would cure the kids' insanity besides time. Unfortunately. And... probably. Gabby he worried about more because she was a girl. Not because he was overprotective of his little princess (...that was Jess) but that growing up in the world was still so difficult for females.

"Maybe it's too simple," he said, without sarcasm. "You're faced with lifechanging decisions all day, stuff that'll affect whole families. So you have to think about the right paperwork and legal channels and who goes where and how to get them there and how to deal with tantrums of a different nature. So just telling the kids 'it's not kicking time' isn't... a natural solution for you." Clement smiled. "If only it was so easy for you. 'It is not child beating time'." He shrugged good naturedly. "So don't hate on yourself. 'Sides, you have this awesome husband who knows how to think simple."

The movies had caught Clement's attention mostly because he'd never seen most of them. That, and he wanted to know what happened so that if either kid wanted to talk about something that made them sad or angry or whatever, he'd be able to zero in on the scene in his head. And while he did like most of the late '00s and early '10s movies best, there was something to be said for all that early hand-drawn animation. Good lord.

A brown eyebrow rose over wire glasses frames. "'No picking up gross things or running off'? Jesse, these are our children we're talking about. If Joey didn't pick up something unidentifiable covered in bugs or sewage and Gabby didn't see something she had to see 'up close' during a walk, it's not really a walk." He chuckled. "All within normal parameters. I wanted them to run off that energy so they'd sleep tonight, with the park cut short."

That made him laugh harder, but very quietly. Gabby especially did not like jollity going on without her. "I'll believe it when I see it, big man. Last time I had to leave you with them a day you were texting me in all-caps two hours later."

Leaning over, he went in for a longer kiss. Physical contact with his husband made the all out action of the day melt away. Sighing, he ran hands through that gold hair as he opened his mouth a little. Couldn't get too hot and bothered.

In less than eight hours they'd both be doing all this again.

[END]?