A Hard Day's Night (Gabe)

[Gabriel James]

Gabriel shifted a bit when Kiara sat next to him - not really purposely moving toward or away from her, as he was unsure where she would want him to be. Even though she seemed to stare forward, avoiding Gabe's eyes, he seemed to not be able to look away, a sadness on his face that reflected hers. He didn't even have an answer to her first question. He didn't know how she was supposed to trust him, especially in his state. Of course, he never accounted for her seeing him like this. He also didn't consider that she might miss him too.

"It makes a difference," Gabe decided with what may have been an overly firm nod. "I figured you never wanted to talk to me again... or at least avoid it," Gabe admitted. Even though they'd gotten along pretty civily at New Years, Gabe could still feel the tension they'd created at Christmas time. He thought Kiara would have no desire to try and rebuild whatever weird kind of relationship they had.

His heart broke a little when Kiara claimed perhaps he was right about Everett, because all this time he'd spent trying to convince himself he was wrong was being rebutted by the blonde. The last thing the little bit of progress he'd made in his head needed was a confirmation from Kiara that they never should have let themselves be any closer than acquaintances. "We never had a problem finding things to talk about, though," Gabe suggested, thinking back to the time where Kiara had shared her bucket list and Gabe revealed some of his deepest thoughts to Kiara - so naturally. "Remember that game we played? With all the questions? I don't think I could have done that with anyone else."

[Deleted]

How would it make a difference? Would missing him as well magically make it better? "All I wanted was for you to stay..." Kiara breathed out. Her volume hardly reached above a whisper, making it hard to tell if it actually did reach Gabriel's ears. She had gotten the same impression as him though. After the man had walked out of the door, she doubted he ever wanted to talk to her again. It was why she didn't reach out. In addition, it had been Gabe who turned his back on her. In turn it made the blonde decide for herself that he would have to be the one to try and reinstate whatever there had been between them. Neither of them made an effort.

As for Everett being right... Kiara merely made that statement because it appeared to be what Gabriel wanted to believe. If she accepted that, perhaps it would be easier to move on. With a sad laugh, a nod followed. "But I guess it was just that, huh? A game?" Her head tilted, just enough to make decent eye contact with the music teacher. "Was I ever... Did you ever look at me differently than Everett's little sister?" Her assumption was that he hadn't. If she ever meant more to him than that, she liked to believe he wouldn't have picked answering the phone above her that one time in the hotel. He would have followed his heart instead of his best friend's judgement.

Within that same second that the question was asked, the blonde pushed herself up from the stairs. Not knowing what his answer might be and sitting so close to him made her tense. By standing up and moving about, it gave her something else to focus on. Until it once more dawned on her that Gabriel was drunk and that his words held no real meaning. "We... should keep going before you fall asleep." And before she would crumble right in front of his eyes.

[Gabriel James]

Gabe had heard, but he didn't have a response for Kiara. He didn't turn away because of her, he never could. He turned away because of his own insecurities and his own demons and here he was, still letting them control his life. And he would be lying if he tried to convince her that he wanted to stay. He was just running from himself, and not from her. He was pretty sure she wouldn't understand that. He was pretty sure no one actually understood him ,the reason he did things particular ways, the things that haunted him when he lay in bed alone at night. He wasn't sure how to share that. He wasn't sure he wanted to - because he should be able to deal with his own problems.

And although he was drunk, Gabe meant every word he said. It was unfortunate that Kiara was wary of that. Though perhaps it wouldn't matter if Gabe couldn't remember in the morning. So he confidently stated, "You were always different. I had to keep reminding myself you were Everett's sister... It was maddening." He sighed, recalling the way things used to be. Though it still was maddening. "I just... I just wanted everyone to be happy... but I fucked that up too... fuck." A sudden wave of nausea hit the man but he suppressed it. He swayed a bit as Kiara stood, as if her presence was keeping him steady.

"'m not sleepy," Gabe claimed, but stood anyway, steps stuttering as he became re-acquainted with his legs.

[Deleted]

It frustrated Kiara to an unxplainable extent when the man told her how he had to remind himself that she was Everett's sister. "Why..? Why did you have to remind herself? Would it have been so bad to ignore that fact for a moment? Did you ever allow yourself to be happy? How can you make everyone happy when you don't know what happiness is yourself?" She wanted to understand why he did things the way he did, but this was quite impossible if he wasn't going to help her see it through his eyes. "I want to understand... I wish I could, but I can't unless you let me in. I guess that might be too much to ask though?"

Her voice sounded helpless, and that was exactly how she felt. When Gabriel rose to his feet, however, it barely took a second for the blonde to move to his side and to grasp his hand with her own. Feeling responsible hadn't subsided during this rather unpleasant conversation. "Sleepy or not, I still think you could use some sleep." Eyes never strayed away from the road ahead. It was quite possibly going to be an interesting walk home. "Get sober again," she breathed out under a deep sigh. This time disappointment seeped through as the main emotion.

"Would... you genuinely want to forget about what happened?" Blue optics drifted up at him as she lightly turned her head. "Between us, I mean," carefully venturing further. While drunk, his words might not be the truth, but at the same time they might just be that. It might as well be the truth that he was blurting out.