Last Hope

[Adrianna Carstyn]

Could the semester really be almost over? Adrianna felt like she'd barely even started, like the past month and a half had been but a week. She was still trying to grow accustomed to Vermont again, it was so different from California that she found herself a little disoriented after living across the country for a year. She'd been busier than ever with her practices with exams and with her assistant instructing gig at the Institute. Busy was good for her though, as long as she paced herself with things, she kept from drowning beneath the weight of a million tasks at once. She had been eating regularly, which was a requirement in dance, she'd been sleeping as much as she could and after a long while of being so unstable, she was finally taking care of herself again. The year before she'd taken off to California was pushed to the recesses of her mind and she took pride again in who she was.

She was better. She was Adrian again.

That was part of the reasons she felt it so important to leave when she did. Without any heartfelt goodbyes and without explanation, she packed up and left in such a hurry, just so nothing held her back. Of course it riddled her with guilt for the next few months, but she believed that her friends, her best friend would have to understand, right? Could Elisia be upset with her for taking off just before the girl graduated? Ellie wasn't an angry girl, so Adrian hardly doubted it. The real wild card, however, was Lani. She'd left him in good enough hands that she hoped so fervently that he wouldn't mind her absence. To be honest, at the time, she had figured it would even be better for him if she were gone. He'd have less to worry about. He wouldn't have to be afraid she'd slip up and end herself back in the hospital. He could be blissful, happy with Odion who was back to stay.

Lani would appreciate that, wouldn't he? Adrianna had barely texted anyone in the year that she was away. On holidays, birthdays, special occasions, she'd send out a "Have a good day, thinking of you <3" text and leave it at that. Ellie would call her when she was in a tight spot, a few times she'd even get a voicemail from Lani, but with everything that she had been dealing with in California, she hardly got back to them. Now that she was back in Vermont, she was doing her best to make amends. The easiest one she'd gotten out of the way. Ellie had been nothing shy of ecstatic for Adrianna to be back. She told her all about the new boy that she was seeing and how things were going in her life. They'd gossiped for hours and hours before Adrian parted with her to go to practice.

The second on her list was going to be the hardest, she felt. Not because she was afraid of Lani or how he'd react to her being back for so long without a word, but because she didn't want to find that she'd left him and that things weren't going well for him. In all of her selfishness, she didn't know what was going on in his life. She had no idea if Odion was still around, what their relationship was like or if he'd bolted again, leaving Lani to deteriorate. Surely in one of his voicemails he'd have said something if that were the case. And she'd have come home immediately if he desperately needed her. But nothing had alarmed her from his messages, and so she hoped that he was doing well. That he was happy the way that she was trying to finally be.

[Lani Hunter]

It had been a long time since he’d seen Adrianna. It hurt, she was his best friend. He missed her. She’d peaced out and he wasn’t sure if he was ever going to see her. He knew that she had a lot on her plate and he didn’t blame her, but he wished she would have said something. He was in a fragile place and so had she, he thought they were helping each other. But Odion returned and everything was confusing again. Maybe she thought Odion being back would fix everything and well, part of that was right. It fixed a lot of things. But that didn’t mean he didn’t have a gaping hole where Adrianna had been when she disappeared. She’d left so fast he didn’t even have a chance to convince her to stay and when she left he truly had to stand on his own.

Odion cushioned the blow significantly, but there were things he wanted to talk about, things about Odion and their relationship that he was afraid to bring up with the redhead. Like how uncomfortable he still was with people knowing about his sexuality, especially after Karalie’s utter rejection. He’d tried to coax Adrianna into conversation for a while, then became angry that she didn’t see him worth anything more than a text message every once and again. He’d tried to call her and he wanted to tell her what was going on in his life but when he went to voicemail he could only wish her well and tell her to call him any time. So much had changed since they’d last seen each other. Lani’s heart was torn between his love for Odion and his fear of what the world through of them. His power was under control but the way it had happened left him bitter.

He was walking slowly back home from hanging out with his sister. They’d needed to coordinate tickets home and Caroline was terribly hard to get to sit still. She was thriving at Hammel and Lani couldn’t be more proud of her. That didn’t mean she didn’t drive him up the wall with her plans to do one thing then changing her mind when something else came along. So finally with Thanksgiving coming up, Lani put his foot down and declared the days that they would be home. God knew how startling it was that it was Lani that was planning trips home and how it was he who was getting calls from his mother asking his sister to call them. It was a strange switch of roles. Stretching out his arms as he walked, he considered just sleeping when he got home. Granted it wasn’t late or anything but he had had a long week and he felt he deserved a night in.

Lani got into his apartment and waded his way through cats. “Serious, how did this happen?” He wondered aloud. He gave them their dinner and put some leftovers in the microwave for himself. The last thing he was expecting today was a knock on the door. At first he thought he was hearing things and when his power verified a person on the other side of the door he thought his power was pulling his leg. With a frown on his face he finished chewing and called that he was coming. He brushed his hands off on his jeans and looked quickly down at his shirt to make sure nothing had fallen on it. He opened the door and just stared at her for a moment. Once he’d gotten over the initial shock, he crossed his arms and leaned casually against the doorframe. “Long time no see,” he said flatly.

[Adrianna Carstyn]

The familiar walk to his apartment left her feeling more nervous than she expected to be. Maybe it was because of the last time she could remember being there, shortly after Odion returned and when he'd slapped her. She willed to forget about it, to push away any ill thoughts she had of Odion because Lani loved him. Of course she still found that he sickened her with how he toyed with Lani, but after what she had done, she didn't think it was very fair for her to think of him as such a terrible person when she had left Lani without a word as well. Perhaps it was a small sense of bitterness that made her leave without saying anything to Lani? She was so frustrated by the situation with Lani's love life that maybe sub-consciously, she'd left because she felt unnecessary in his life after Odion came back.

She hadn't read into it when she left, but with the overwhelming sense of guilt that she felt, part of her wondered now if that was her reasoning. At the time she didn't think it was out of malicious intent, but her mindset at the time wasn't stable. Was that a logical excuse? Something that would take away her guilt? Not being mentally stable? Of course not, she was always ridden with guilt when it came to Lani, no matter what happened between them.

Her palms were sweating as she stood in front of his door. For a moment, all she could do was stare at it. It wasn't until she felt his ability connecting with her own that she couldn't take it anymore. Adrianna was suddenly pummeled with the need to see her best friend and she knocked on the door, despite the sickening twist of her stomach from the nervousness she felt. The suspense of his reaction was only making it worse and she hoped with everything she had that he wouldn't hate her enough to just ignore her completely. Or did he not feel the same connection with her after so long apart? The darkness crept up over her mind and she wrapped her arms tightly around her body to get a grip.

The door opened and he stared at her, just as she stared at him. Wide-eyed and completely immovable. He looked different. Older, of course, and bitter. He was angry with her and she instantly felt ten times more guilty than she was already. Her hands dug into her sides as she stood there, still frozen to the same spot. Long time no see, so empty. Maybe he hadn't missed her. Maybe he was mad that she came back at all. Her mind piled up with all of these different reasons of why he hadn't swept her up in a hug and told her never to leave again. She was reminded of the last time they'd fought. When her stability had crumbled and she turned to coping mechanisms that had done nothing for her health.

She frowned and looked down finally, "You're mad at me..." It was all she could conjure up in the moment.

[Lani Hunter]

The last thing Lani thought he would be doing tonight would be talking to Adrianna. Honestly, it wasn’t even on his radar. She looked good, better. Her nerves were nearly palpable. He’d worried about her and he was so relieved to see she was doing well. Happier and that made Lani happy. Sure she’d left him without so much as a ‘catch you later’ and that angered him. But maybe whatever she needed to do she needed to do on her own. And it looked to have worked. That made Lani’s anger dissipate like vapor on the wind. That didn’t mean he was going to let her off the hook easily. His masks fit as well as they always had and his expression was void of emotion. She squirmed and Lani fought to hold onto his urge to take her in his arms and tell her never to leave him again.

He stared her down, his gray eyes sharp as blades, waiting for her next move. He’d been through the ringer this past year and Adrianna had been the one to help him at least regain sanity. Maybe she thought that with Odion back, Lani wouldn’t have time, or wouldn’t make time for her. Maybe she thought that just because Odion was back, Lani’s life was all butterflies and rainbows. That frustrated him, he didn’t want to assume what was on her mind, but he knew Adrianna well enough to know that the last time he’d seen her, Odion had done an emotional number on her. Lani hadn’t been able to stand up for her then, but God if Odion hit his best friend again, he’d give Odion another set of black eyes.

She broke eye contact first and Lani raised an eyebrow at her. He leaned against the wall and narrowed his eyes at her. The softness of her voice reminded him of the Adrianna he had first met. The Adrianna before he’d ruined her life. He sighed dramatically, to get her attention. “I am,” he agreed, before pushing himself off the wall and letting his arms drop to his side. “But I’ve decided how you’re gonna make it up to me.” He pushed the door open in a welcoming gesture. “You’re going to come in and tell me everything.” His lips twitched into a smile. He was angry, but the happiness he felt seeing her again was overpowering that. If there was one thing he had learned, it was that he should at least give people a chance to explain themselves.

“You look good,” he added before he turned away, leaving his apartment door open for her. He would be utterly heartbroken if he felt her footsteps retreat back down the hall. She was feeling guilty enough, he decided, he didn’t need to help her with that. His back turned, he allowed himself a real smile.