Time Warp: The Beginning of the End (Zac)

[Stella Pinyin]

It was cold. Stella’s arm was still resting on Zac’s as the unlikely couple stood silently inside the Mausoleum. Shivering slightly, Stella tugged gently on the taller man’s arm. ”We should go,” she murmured. It had been over an hour; the flowers were there, and the elder Mr LaRousse had spoken briefly to his son and the albino girl about the late Mrs LaRousse’s positive qualities. Zac was quiet, unusual for him. This was the second time he’d brought Stella to see his mother, and he was always so quiet. Mr LaRousse had left almost a quater of an hour ago, and since the sun had dropped the marble room was very, very cold. Slowly, Stella let the light she was providing dim.

There was a car waiting; Stella didn’t want him to drive, so she’d made sure the car would come with a driver. ”We’ll be late for the reservations, come on Zac,” the girl tugged on his arm as she spoke, pulling him towards the car. She could make it out quite clearly; surgery had improved her eyesight to bring it to 17/17 vision. The stylish dress she wore under the even more stylish coat, combined with her elegantly coffered hair suggested a very different girl to the one Zac had met five years ago, and while she wasn’t always eager to follow him in his social butterfly antics, she was there and she was a lot stronger willed then she looked.

”Zac, can you give the driver the address please?” she asked as they slid into the seats, taking the boy’s (no, not boy. Young man now) hand in hers. ”Zac, your father’s just gone home so it’s just us for dinner. That’s alright?” The while girl looked out the window nearest her, still clutching his hand. The whiteness of her fingers against his tan made it look like he was holding hands with a ghost.

[Zachary LaRousse]

Thirteen years. He can’t believe it’s been that long already. Thirteen years and still, justice hasn’t been brought to his mother. Still no clue about who could’ve killed her, or why. Which is really disappointing as it is infuriating, considering the number of extremely powerful meta-humans at his disposal, given his position at the clan hierarchy now. Other than a few dead-end leads, they’ve got nothing. What they knew thirteen years ago is still want they had in hand now. (No, he simply won’t stand channelers. Other than pyrokinetics, he’s got a huge doubt on such people, doubting if they’re even meta at all). Then again, lashing out won’t bring his mother back to life, or at least show him the answers.

So he simply stood in front of her grave once more, staring blankly at the name engraved on the marble stone. His fists clutched tightly as he looked, holding back the tears of frustration and embarrassment that are threatening to come out. Every time he visits his mother’s grave, may it be because of her birthday, death anniversary or he just feels like it, he feels so useless and helpless. “Just give me a few more minutes,” he answered blankly, as Stella, high school classmate and current lady love, urged him to go.

With one final nod, Zac let himself be dragged by Stella to the car, frowning slightly as she mentioned the reservations. “So? I could simply buy the restaurant you know,” he snapped answered, slightly bothered at Stella’s apparent rush to get off the cemetery. True, it’s been an hour, so? It’s just her second time around and she’s already all eager to leave.

Rolling his eyes, he reached into his pocket, took out a small piece of paper and handed it to the driver. The driver simply nodded and, as he heard the door close after Stella, started the not-so-long drive to the place Stella chose a week before. “Still can’t understand why you insisted on having a driver there. I’ve been driving since I was 16; heck, your first night in Hammel I drove for you, don’t you have faith in me?” It was supposed to be a half-hearted joke, but given his not-so-good mood, it might’ve turned a little bit sour. “Dad’s getting old, it’s not like we can blame him,” he nodded slightly, holding Stella’s hand tightly but looking out the window opposite her, “He does appreciate your almost every day visits. Says you’re like the daughter he never had.”

[Stella Pinyin]

The cold was getting into her bones, and it couldn’t be healthy for either of them.

”I know, Zac,” Stella replied soothingly, ”but it’s getting late.” There was no point taking his tone to heart; Stella knew Zac and in these (thankfully rare) low moods he wasn’t thinking straight. There was no point in rising to snap back, even if Stella had wanted to. She missed his teasing when he got like this. Well, almost. With her better eyesight, Stella hadn’t missed Zac’s overly bright eyes, but he’d only feel ashamed if she handed him a tissue.

”I don’t want you having to carry me to bed again,” Stella replied lightly, glancing over to him. All she could see was a hint of cheek and perfectly styled brown hair. ”Faith is nothing to do with it,” she squeezed his hand, a silent you shouldn’t need to ask. ”Besides, you never let me drive.”

No one could really blame Zac for that... Stella was a terrible driver, but she was trying to elevate the mood. She was never very good at being funny; that was Zac’s role. She just liked to laugh, when the time was right.

”We can visit him tomorrow if you want,” Stella offered, watching him with careful violet eyes. She swallowed a little thickly at Zac’s next comment, and smiled to herself. It meant a lot; it had taken a while for the senior LaRousse to warm to the moon girl. The man had been wary of his son dating someone who might give him bleached grandchildren. Not that kids was on the cards, yet. Zac still had to get his masters and Stella was still hoping to graduate with her post graduate in Astrology. It was a little pointless, maybe, but the life of an academic was one that would suit Stella, in her opinion.

”Well, I’m glad. He’s a wonderful man,” Stella said after a thoughtful moment, ”his son is quite similar. Only with nicer hats.” They were almost there by now; the Japanese restaurant had been alerted and a private room was already set up. He’d feel better after some food, hopefully. Almost absently, Stella checked her hair with one hand. After two and a half years, Zac’s constant need to preen was rubbing off a little on his girlfriend.

[Zachary LaRousse]

Zac’s eyes rolled, more in amusement and feeling of sheer stupidity than irritation, as Stella spoke. He shook his head as the realization that indeed, Stella would isn’t the type to put up a fight, washed over him. For a moment there, he felt like such a big fool. In retrospect, he and Stella never really had a massive argument, one that involves shouting and insulting and general chaos. Their disagreements were more or less small and petty, culminating in a moment of silence ranging from a few minutes to a few weeks (he could still remember the time Stella gave him the silent treatment because he forgot her birthday; of course Zac apologized almost immediately, in true LaRousse fashion). Perhaps it’s why the two worked out as ‘well’ as they did: Stella’s passive behavior was enough to tone the haughty Zachary, and Zachary’s outgoing attitude helps Stella become more social and outspoken. One could say that it’s their own special ‘push-and-pull’.

“We are so not talking about you and driving,” replied Zac, followed by a light chuckle. Seems Stella’s self-depreciation worked. While Zac doesn’t really promote it with his girlfriend (she’s already got enough self-esteem issues, as Zac sees it; he needs to help her get over it, not encourage it), he can’t deny the fact that there’s a certain humor whenever Stella does it. Her jokes are far and few, but when she does say one, obscure and far-off as they may, they’ve never failed to make him smile even in his most rotten moods. Not ever. His mood slowly becoming better, he returned the light squeeze and gave her hand a light pat. He turned to her, smiling slightly and winking. “Only the car companies are happy at the rate you’re going. I mean, six cars in a month? Who does that?”

By nature, Antonio’s a whole lot more accepting and welcoming than Zac. He has quite the big heart, treating everyone in his house and his company as family. Unfortunately for Stella, she came into a time when Antonio’s slowly becoming more criticizing of Zac’s relationships. When Zac became of legal age, he went into far more parties and brought home quite the number of women, his relationships with them ranging from simple one-night stands to ‘an eternity’ (which, before meeting Stella, meant two to three weeks). This worried his father, hence becoming a little bit strict when Zac brought Stella home. But, as time passed by, he saw how Stella was different, both by herself and the effect she’s brought upon Zac, which is why he deeply regrets how he’s acted before. “You’ve been visiting him an awful lot lately. If I was a jealous boyfriend, I would’ve thought you and Dad are having an affair already,” he teased, “Indeed. Apparently he doesn’t follow what his fashion coordinator tells him. The stubborn man.”

After a while the car stopped in front of the said restaurant and the door opened, Zac going out first and leading his lady love to the said establishment. “Remind me again why you chose this restaurant?” he asked as they went in and was led into their seats.


ooc:
If Neon needs a reference, this is older Zac. XD.
- Jam

[Stella Pinyin]

”The last two were not my fault,” Stella insisted half heartedly, smiling mostly to her self. ”You were distracting me on purpose, don’t blame me!” Copying a move Zac often pulled on her, she poked his nose as he winked at her. Her own smile grew as she saw the tension starting to melt away from Zac’s shoulders. It was not often that Zac took on the role of the quiet one but Stella had had plenty of lessons in being light hearted from a very... dedicated teacher.

Speaking of...

Stella’s teacher in the art of talking life lightly was touching on a subject of still relatively unknown sensitivity. The senior LaRousse had become something of a father figure to Stella, the first one she’d really had who had been willing to talk to her about meta history and her own plans for a future. Still, it was a bit uncomfortable to mention that to Zac; Stella was well aware of his rather... promiscuous past, and thought that telling him just how close she was getting to his father might make him feel trapped. With that on her mind, the somewhat unsavory joke was met with one of Stella’s trademark blushes. ”Well, some people don’t like being told what to wear, you know.”

Stella argued with the stylist Zac had hired for her all the time. One thing Stella would put her foot down about; she was not wearing purple lipstick just because it was striking.

Following Zac, Stella made a tutting sound with her tongue against her teeth. ”They’ve got a load of fresh Hokkaido crab delivered yesterday, and fresh toro. You love Hokkaido crab,” Stella was not asking. If he did not, he would now. Cooking and fine ingredients were Stella’s domain and if she said the food was good, then it was always good. Recently she’d made a habit of getting tours of the kitchens in some of the restaurants the pair frequented, to pick up tips and to make sure they were clean. Properly clean.

The pair were greeted by the head waiter and shown quickly to a private room. Stella sank into her seat and passed the wine list to Zac. ”You pick. They have plum wine in if you want something sweet.” Carefully, she watched. It would be better if Zac didn’t drink too heavily, given the emotions that would be swimming in that head of his, but she wouldn’t stop him if that was how he wanted to feel better.

[Zachary LaRousse]

Indeed, Zac’s sour and sulky mood had been somewhat alleviated, if not extinguished altogether, by the light-hearted banter they’re having. Granted it wasn’t too good for Stella, as it was her failures they (or most probably only he) were laughing about, but then again, it was she who started the whole talk in the first place. Should she accuse him of making fun of her, he’d simply use the whole ‘If was you who started it’ argument and laugh his butt off. “Uh-huh. Am I suppose to buy that one then?” he teased, chuckling slightly as Stella gave him his ‘signature move’: the nose tap.

While he has quite the repertoire of flirtatious gestures, the playful tap (sometimes light, sometimes with a bit more force) on the other’s nose has been somewhat the main thing he did with Stella (and as it seems, Stella’s been the only one to receive such a gesture since then). He usually reserved such an action for those he deem quite innocent and gullible, and Stella was the epitome of naïveté back in the days. He laughed slightly as he recalled their first meeting, how he literally swept Stella off her feet and she just reacts with quite the confused look. He made dozens of innuendos, some obscure and some rather blunt really, but still she didn’t get it. Heck, he even flashed his abs in front of her and she innocently thought he was talking about something else entirely. “Hey, I’ve been distracting you since the first time we’ve met. Heck, I’ve been distracting everyone since I’ve been alive. So I think that doesn’t count,” said Zac with a smug smile, returning the nose-tap favor.

As much as he’d like to deny it, when his father did show signs of immensely liking Stella, he did feel a little bit suffocated. He wasn’t used to being in quite the long relationship (they were a good two to three months back then, if he remembered right), and Antonio being attached to Stella wasn’t helping much either. Thankfully Cedric, his ever faithful ‘butler’, sensed (him being a telepath) Zac’s unease and urged him to talk to his father. Fortunately they understood one another, and somehow, as expected, Zac was ok with somehow slowing his life’s pace down as time went by. He’s still with Stella right? “Be happy. They’ve been giving me nothing but shirts and slacks lately. And suits. Apparently I can’t wear neon-green skinnies anymore.” Not that he thinks it fits his age anymore, but still, what he’d do to be able to be outrageous like his old teenage self again, at least in terms of fashion.

He simply shook his head when Stella mentioned the Hokkaido crab. “I only liked it because it was Mom’s favorite,” he mumbled, memories of the times his mom acted like a complete fool whenever his dad mentioned about getting it. Whatever happiness he felt a few moments earlier is suddenly drowned once more by the bitter memory of her unfortunate passing, evidenced by his darting glances in the room and labored breathing. “You pick. You knew more about the kitchen than I’ll ever know about anyway,” said Zac as he promptly returned the list to the waiter, giving Stella a forced smile. With Stella as skilled as she is with a pan (which surprised the mimic when he first saw her in action), Zac didn’t really bother much with the kitchen anymore. “And it’s not like you haven’t got anything planned yet. Surprise me.”

[Stella Pinyin]

”No, you just keep buying cars,” Stella replied primly, though her eyes were shining mischief. Zac wasn’t learning from his past mistakes; by now Stella would have assumed he would just give up, but he kept insisting she’d only get better with practice...

...and understandably didn’t want her driving his brightly colored speed machines.

He was laughing and Stella smiled back at him, glad for the sight. His eyes looked like little crescent moons when he was laughing. Still, she shook her head with a giggle when he started tapping her nose again. ”You are a great distraction,” she agreed, ”And by great I refer to size, not good.” If Zac had a chance to turn that around on her, he would. She’d learnt that within hours of meeting him. Still, many things had changed...

”You look good in suits,” Stella replied with approving eyes, and a very rare cheeky smile. Perhaps it was not an appropriate time, but then, Zac seemed to think it was always an appropriate time for his much more... crass version of compliments. He had always seemed thankful that given Stella’s... skills, turning the lights off was never a possibility, even if that had made for an awkward first time sleepover. ”And those skinnies were amazing, but I am not sorry they are retired.” They had always made him easy to spot, that was for sure. And back then, anything that could make things easier to see was alright by the albino girl.

”I, I didn’t know,” Stella said slowly, the lightness in her face fading to concern. She’d made a mistake... she pressed his hand between hers, trying to catch his eye or at least get him to look towards her. "She would approve of the choice then, maybe."

The comment about the kitchen stung a little; Stella knew Zac didn’t see much point in cooking when you could employ chefs.”Alright,” she said gently, then beckoned a waiter and placed her order for a bottle of the fruit wine. The menu had already been organized, she’d been trying to do something thoughtful... Waving the waiter away, Stella poured the wine herself, only a little in her own glass. She had no head for liquor; two glasses would be more than enough.

”Now,” with a fixed expression, Stella mentally braced herself as she set out to get Zac talking. ”What do you want to talk about, ai?” she called him the chinese word for love, which for some reason they had both agreed was much less sappy then the english one. ”I'm happy to listen, or talk, whatever you'd like."

[Zachary LaRousse]

Zac almost burst into laughing with that one. Seems she’s really learned a thing or two from him. Should this conversation have happened a good three or four years ago, he highly doubts his then-friend Stella would come up with something as witty as this one. “Indeed,” he said, shaking his head, “Are you sure you’re really dating me for me and not just for my money?” As offending as it may sound, his face clearly says that he’s just teasing the albino lady. While he’s had his fair share of clingy gold-diggers, with a telepath as a butler, they never really get close enough for him to have some sort of emotional attachment. And besides, Stella’s far too ‘pure’ to think of anything as absurd as that. If anything, Zac confesses that he was the one who corrupted her really. “You’re just a bit too nervous really. Don’t worry, I’ll buy you a worn out car next time so it won’t be such a waste.”

“Dearie, I know I’m big, you’ve told me a dozen times over,” he chuckled, his ego once again inflating twice its normal size. Instead of teasing Stella once more about his supposed size, his mind unconsciously drifted to the time they first slept together, and the awkwardness Stella’s glowing ability brought upon. Indeed, while Zac was used to doing it with the lights on or the lights off, having the lights ‘partially’ on was quite the experience for him, claiming it to be one of the moments his ‘masculinity’ have been tested to the fullest. “Such a hater,” he said, nudging Stella slightly on the side, “Tease me again and I’ll wear that sexy ‘man-bra’ I wore for Halloween. I know you love it so much really.”

-xxx-

“She’d love it. She’d love you too,” the mimic said blankly. He just sat there, eyes darting across the room, never really meeting Stella’s eye directly. He wants to, but he can’t. Not with the confusion he’s feeling right now. As weird as it may sound, he feels like he’s being torn into two different directions by the two important women in his life, one in his past, the other in the present. Indeed, he feels sad and angry about his mother’s untimely death, and their visit just amplified those volatile emotions to unprecedented levels. But emotional instability aside, he could feel Stella struggling (with him) through all these, through his rather extreme mood swings over the past few days. And he’d want to get over it, calm the raging storm inside him, but he just can’t. Not a chance really.

Zac actually meant the cooking-comment as a compliment; he trusts Stella’s choices, her knowledge being a whole lot more expansive than his, hence leaving all the decisions regarding their meal tonight in her hands. Then again, he must’ve used quite the tone, which explains her taking it into offense. “What to talk about? Well the stocks have been down lately, but Dad says it’ll get better in a few days. I’ll be having another business meeting with the Straathof family to talk about the possible absorption of Straathof Industries into the LaRousse Empire come Tuesday (which means I probably won’t be around for much of the next week again), and…” Zac narrated in such an unenthusiastic tone, clasping his hands together and laying it down on the table, “The new cancer vaccine’s development is delayed once more. They’ve been given a month already and still they haven’t found the reason for the unwanted mutation. Makes me think I should get down into the labs myself and do some work really.”

Zac knew what Stella wanted to talk about; it was very evident in her tone. And he would appreciate talking about it really. It’s just, like every other guy, he finds it very difficult to express it, despite this being Stella already. He just can’t find the right words to say.


ooc:
A little crappy, sorry. >.<
- Jam

[Stella Pinyin]

”I was the only girl at that party who’s date was showing more skin, Zac,” Stella shook her head, one hand hiding her smile. ”I couldn’t compete!” As for the other comments, she had not dignified them with a response. She also regretted teaching Zac any chinese; she would not be embarrassed at all if he wasn’t able to understand what she said... sometimes.

~~~

That meant a lot, for all that it was said so flatly. Stella smiled sadly, even as the first course arrived; limestone lettuce with rock shrimp and scallop, oysters with rice vinegar and soy, and thinly sliced root vegetables with the infamous Hokkaido crab. With carful hands, Stella served herself and Zac, not looking up until both plates were elegantly laid out with morsels. It was something to do with her hands, and while she was concentrating she could take another moment to collect her thoughts.

The last few days had been... tough. While Stella was trying to be as understanding as possible, given the horrible situation, Zac’s temper had been growing, and he had been flipping between lashing out until she had to leave the room, and falling into deep sad spells where Stella would just get out ice cream (and Gelati for her) and hug him until he felt like talking again.

Still, it was the sarcastic, mocking turns that were the hardest to bear. Stella had been clueless when they had met, and she had not been as worldly, but that had been years ago and she did not appreciate being talked down to constantly. Her lips pressed together tightly, and she took a deliberate bite of lotus root before answering Zac’s speech.

”You want to talk business?” She asked, her own tone gentle but firm, and making it very clear that she wasn’t taking an inch of this. Looking back down at her plate, she picked up a shrimp between her chopsticks and chewed slowly. ”Zac, please. You can talk to me about how you are feeling. Don’t push me out like this.”

[Zachary LaRousse]

Despite being a jerk, Zac knew how tense the atmosphere between him and Stella is right now. Heck, even the servers felt it (he could see it in their eyes and the way they quickly walked in and out), and they were only around the two for a minute or so. Looking back, this was actually the first time he and Stella had quite the argument. Or he and anyone for that matter. Then again, he hasn’t been so invested with the others as he was with Stella.

Taking a deep breath in to hopefully clear his mind, he quietly leaned back to his chair once more, arms crossed in front of him as Stella carefully served him and herself the hors d’oeuvre. As much as he’d like to marvel at the skill Stella has in arranging all that is in front of him (as far as he knows, Stella learned all this from home, which was a skill in itself), he can’t. Hand on his chin and his right foot unconsciously tapping the floor, he was clearly in a state of confusion. How was he supposed to tell her anyway? And if he did, would she understand? It’s not like she went through the same things as he did. Or worse even, it’s not like telling her would magically solve everything.

He knows he’s been awful lot moody lately, and while he does admit that the ice cream and the hugs, how fattening the treat may be, is comforting. But then again, all it gives him is temporary relief. After a wonderful night of silent hugs and innocent kisses, when he wakes up, it’s still there. He wants something lasting, something long term. So unless Stella had the ability to travel back in time and show them his mother’s murderer’s face, or even yet, prevent her death altogether, it’s just not going to work.

He took a bite out of the crab then took a sip of the wine. Indeed, she has excellent taste. As stern as he tried his expression to be, a small smile broke out of him, even for a bit. Maybe the food would be enough to salvage the sour mood they’re in after all. “I’m not pushing you out Stella,” he paused for a bit, shaking his head and taking another deep breath, “It’s not like you were involved in the first place.” Instead of reeling back, he instead went forward some more, saying, “Don’t act like you don’t know what’s happening. I’m clear as ice these past few days and I know it. But what good would it be to tell you all these anyway?”

[Stella Pinyin]

The smile gave Stella a moment of hope, but as Zac went on, that was pressed out. Her face very still as she rearranged the slices of radish and carrot and slivers of crab meat on the dark blue glass plate into a rising sun. Her jaw was tight, and her fingers were clutching her enameled chopsticks tightly He was going too far this time.

”Zac, that’s not,” fair, right, ok... they were all true but they didn’t seem suitable. ”It helps, talking about it. I mean, I know it’s hard to,” Stella swallowed, leaning her head back for a moment, ”it’s hard to talk when it’s hurting, but I mean, I do have some idea about it.” White teeth bit into artificially blushed lips as her free hand grasped the stem of her wine glass and took a sip.

She was trying. Stella wasn’t used to talking about feeling either; growing up with a man who believed firmly in children shook be seen and not heard, opening up was not easy for her either. But she was trying, she was trying so hard and he was making it clear he saw no point to it. Saw no point in trying. And that, that she was not happy about. ”I can see you’re, you’re angry and you’re hurting and you feel guilty, but, you’re not letting me be involved. I just have to accept it when you want to yell, or mock, and I’m trying to help,” Looking back down, Stella tapped the side of her plate nervously; she wasn’t really used to continuing an argument. Confrontation wasn’t her thing; she would usually just accept the situation or leave and let Zac figure out why she was angry.

”Do you want me to be involved?” she asked after a moment. ”You take me to see her, but apart from that, all I hear is from your father.”

[Zachary LaRousse]

As it was, Stella not only has good taste in food, but an excellent eye for restaurants as well. The private room they’re in boasts a wonderful mix of modern and traditional Japanese décor, from the Zen paintings and bamboo vases near the door, to the miniature rock fountain to Zac’s right. Would Zac’s mood be a whole lot different, he would’ve smothered Stella with words of appreciation and thanks, as he did like minimalistic themes a bit more than others (though it doesn’t show much in his choice of clothing). Unfortunately (for both of them), the only thing he can see now is the unease in Stella’s face, the anger and sadness and confusion he’s all inflicting on her. “Then why do you keep on asking?” he barked back still, the bitterness he feels towards his mother’s unresolved fate drowning all rational thought.

He shook his head when Stella asked if she should just accept everything. Frankly, he thinks it would be the best course of action really. That she hope and pray that what Zac’s rather emotional cycle is just a phase; that he’ll get over it (no matter how hopeless he feels inside). “You don’t know what it feels like, not one bit,” he growled, bowing his head and pinching his nose bridge, voice a little too low and angsty, even for Zac, “I’ve tried so many times. But it’s all just dead-ends after dead-ends. Then this lead comes along. But then..” His lip quivered for a bit, banging the table with his fist, sending some utensils in the mid-air for a split-second. “Sh*t,” he mumbled, his eyes slowly becoming watery.

“And Dad’s stories aren’t enough for you now Stella?” He himself can’t quite comprehend what he’s saying right now, all these conflicting emotions about keeping Stella in the dark and yet wanting not to hurt her making him all lost and confused. He was about to add something, but quickly caught himself. “You don’t have any idea how it hurts Stella. You wouldn’t,” he said blankly, slumping back to his chair with his arms crossed, eyes down at his feet, “You’re lucky. Your parents didn’t die in cold blood, nor did you get the chance to meet your parents so, you don’t know how it feels like Glowworm.”

Oh snap.


ooc:
So sorry for the late reply Neon. >.<
- Jam

[Stella Pinyin]

”Because I love you, you stupid...” Stella’s eyes widened, the woman clearly surprised at her own outburst. ”Sorry, I didn’t mean to say that." She clapped a hand to her mouth and shook her head. Stella never lost her temper, but even her seemingly everlasting patience was starting to wear thin. The slight glow of her skin, mostly hidden by the artful lighting in the room, was increasing slightly as her frustration grew. She was trying, she was trying so hard but it was like for every inch she gained with Zac, he would push her back.

And he was pushing again. ”I think I can say I have some...” she started quietly but Zac was still talking, clearly upset. Putting her own hurt inside she reached forward to cover his hand with hers, her own face softening. But he was not done. Her neck stiffened and she drew her hand and her comfort back. ”I’m not dating your father, am I?” she pointed out, her own voice trembling slightly even as she started to glow brighter.

It was like he had slapped her. It stung, but the shock was worse. His old pet name for her, back when they were at school and he was a narcissistic jerk and she had been afraid of her own shadow... She’d never heard him make it sound so pathetic, so stupid. Carefully, with considered grace she set her chopsticks down and looked up at him. He’d gone too far. ”Lucky?” she repeated softly, then again, with less constraint. ”Lucky, Zac? It was luck that left me without anyone who cared about me except for some distant relative who saw looking after me as doing his duty?” Her hands were shaking, so she gripped her knees to hide it. This wasn’t right, it was horrible timing, but he had stopped pulling his punches and some things were beyond even her endurance. Some things were out of bounds; Stella's parents were out of bounds. Too far.

”No, Zac. You don’t understand. I’m sorry for your loss, I am so sorry you’ve gone through loosing your mother, but you,” a pause, but her composure, her need to keep her feelings under control, was cracking faster than she could repair it. ”You’ve had your father, you’ve had Pete, you’ve had people who’ve loved you and cared for you and looked out for you for your entire entitled life so do not tell me I don’t understand hurt, or pain, or loss.”

She was breathing heavily, as if she’d run a marathon. It felt like she had, her heart was pounding hard enough to snap her sternum. She rose to her feet, hardly aware of doing so. ”The only person I’ve ever known to love me is you, and if this is how you treat people you love, I don’t want it!” For the first time since she’d left Hammel, as she headed towards the door, Stella felt her powers slip out of her control, and the room flashed with white, hot light.

[Zachary LaRousse]

Zac had full knowledge that he went below the belt with his remarks. That was his prime purpose after all: to stop Stella from butting into his affairs by saying not-so-decent things to her. And apparently, out-of-line remarks were under that umbrella.

From his supposedly sarcastic rhetoric about Stella’s motivation for wanting to be involved, to his mentions of her parents’ unfortunate death, one can say that it wasn’t done on impulse, but instead said under careful, yet twisted, calculation and coldness. Even his use of her pet name (which, on a normal day, would be used with utter reverence and care, as he gave it to her even before they got together) was done under the same tainted logic.

Ever since he was a child, he’d never been one for failure. Groomed to be the best ever since he was born, standing on second place has never been an option for him. Which is why the failure of his latest quest about his mother’s death, wherein he found a link between her and MSAD (which turned out to be quite the dead-end really), hit him hard, as he personally ‘lead’ the search in this one (he even spent extra hours in his company’s lab to examine some evidence himself). His immense anger and frustration with himself, combined with his slight irritation that Stella keeps on prodding him, caused him to lash out on her unintentionally, his heart feeling little remorse for what he has done.

Only when the bright hot flash blinded him did he see the light (pun intended). He tried to cover his eyes, but Stella was just too powerful for him; seeing that she glowed strongly even under bright lights on normal circumstances, her letting loose was just too much. If Zac had tapped into an animal with enhanced night perception, say a wildcat or a wolf, he’d probably be blind right now.

As reason dawned on him (yey for puns), he slowly walked over to where Stella is, hoping to calm her down, only to feel her stand up and walk away. “Stella! Wait! No!” he shouted, eyes still reeling from the flash, hence shut tightly. As he felt her steps go even faster, he switched into a rabbit (for enhanced hearing and agility) and finally grabbed her hand, hoping it’ll stop her at her tracks. “Please,” he said, his lips quivering slightly.

Feeling it won’t be enough to keep Stella from leaving (permanently or otherwise), he then pulled her closer and pinned her to the wall, trying to be as gentle as possible, her left arm kept in place by his hand. “I’m…sorry…I…” he gulped, opening his eyes for a split second as they’re still burning from the flash, “I shouldn’t have done that…” Teardrops slowly forming in his eyes, he slowly leaned forward to kiss Stella, hoping it’ll be enough to quell her anger.

[Stella Pinyin]

After years of training with quickly changing, often extreme levels of light, Stella had learnt when it was safe to open her eyes without risking damage or lack of vision. Still, there was not much to see; everything was white. Zac’s hair and suit stood out against the rest of the great whiteness, and she tried to snatch her hand back when he grabbed it. She wouldn’t let him talk her out of this again, not when it had been so obvious her words were having no effect until she had finally proven she would go.

Still, maybe it was the light and maybe it was hearing the quake in his throat but Stella’s own eyes were starting to water. She didn’t speak; she didn’t trust herself not to give up. Her breath caught in her throat as he physically pinned her. It would be so easy to just stay, to let him apologize and make it up to her with a balloon ride (like her birthday) or a new car (their one year anniversary). It was too much, too far, too deep for that.

”No, don’t-” Stella started, but Zac’s mouth on hers served as an effective gag. She closed her eyes tightly and for a second relaxed. Zac was the only guy she’d kissed, who she’d let kiss her.

you don’t know how it feels like Glowworm

No. "No!" Pushing back, Stella quickly broke the light hold Zac had on her wrist. He wasn’t sorry for what he said, he was sorry she was leaving. He knew how she felt about her parents, he was the only person who did know. ”I can’t do this anymore,” she said, the light starting to dim as she pulled it back under her skin. ”I love you, I do, but,” She grasped his hand before he’d have a chance to grab at her again, ”I can’t keep on doing this. I can’t,” quickly, she pressed his hand to her mouth and kissed it, then let it drop. ”This isn’t working. You knew,” Articulation was not working, she couldn't speak without choking. No point in lamenting what he said now. She turned and rested her hand on the door handle for a moment, steeling herself. ”I’m going, Zac,” she said finally, and pulled open the door. ”I’m sorry.”

The light was pulled out with her, the electronic lights in the room flickering on slowly. It wasn’t until Stella had stumbled into a cab that she let herself cry, her face buried in her hands.