Stop letting zombies into the House! [closed]

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

It was nothing new for both Lia and Feli to spend the night sat in front of their consoles playing some sort of multiplayer game. Lia was currently hiding behind Aurora as they explored this particular building that was festooned with zombies. Her hands trembled on the controller and she nervously reached over to take a sip of hot chocolate (Feli's speciality) when she realised there was a zombie right behind them.

"FELI! FELI! RAPE RAPE RAPE!" She squealed, upsetting Aurora and getting kisses all over her face. Mashing X, she winced and tried to shoot at the evil Zombie that was sleezing over them, then shrieked as another one jumped from the ceiling.

Cowering behind the white dog, she hit pause and lifted Merlin (from his comfortable spot between them) up and over her face to hide it. "I don't like it." She pouted, snuggling her pets and putting a hand on her chest. "I think my heart just imploded." She added, taking a deep breath and picking up the controller once more. "Can we stop for food in a bit? I have a craving for bacon rolls." She jutted her lip out a bit, then set the fat cat back down.

"Okay. I can do this. I will murderate the zombies." She paused, looking over at Feli with a grin. "Zombies piss me orf." She added, remembering the youtube channel they watched together.

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

Felicity rather enjoyed their quiet nights in, especially when those nights involved killing zombies and snuggling with Lia and their mini menagerie. Nana didn't seem to be bothered at all by the shrieking and shouting coming from the two women as zombies tried to devour their faces and instead she lay on the floor across both of their feet snoring happily away in doggy dreamland. It was poor Merlin and Nana that got most of the shrieking and attention as they tried not to die for the umpteenth time in the past half hour.

It wasn't so much that zombie that startled Felicity as it was the yelping coming from her wife and she jumped before fumbling with the controls to turn around and shoot the gurgling bastard. But it had brought friends, which caused Feli to shout something awful about how she was going to shove bullets where the sun don't shine... but then Lia paused the game and Feli pouted. "Awww, I was just about to annihilate them."

She couldn't stop but to smile at the terrified look on Lia's face, leaning over and gently kissing her cheek. "Let's play this last round and then we'll take a break for food. Knowing us, we'll die the minute we unpause it." She smiled, giving Lia's hand a little squeeze.

That was almost spot on. As soon as Lia hit the button, Feli noticed a shambling horde of undead making their way steadily towards them. "Noooo! I LOVE TO LIVE!" She frantically threw grenades at the group and then turned to run away. "Don't let them get you, baby! I mean, I love you and all, but I don't think we'd work out if you were trying to eat my brains all the time."

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

While Lia did enjoy quiet nights in with her wife, she preferred it when they played one of the less terrifying games. Ones that involved floaty pretty fighting characters with swords or mages or archers, not ugly zombie rape. Merlin seemed used to all this noise and merely washed a paw with his eyes ever so slightly narrowed.

Lia couldn't breathe quite so well since the fear had made her chest go all tight, and she downed a big swig of hot chocolate and wiped her mouth on the back of her hand. "I know, I ... just needed to stop before I had a panic attack." She laughed, blushing a little and nudging Feli with a tender smile.

Within a few seconds of them unpausing the game, Lia's health bar was ridiculously low and the redhead was mashing every button she could to keep the zombies at bay. "I'm out of health packs!" She squeaked, managing to cut down a particularly nasty looking zombie with her knife and then running off the second the grenades were thrown.

"We made it!" She said, looking more shocked than anything else. However, just as she turned to highfive her wife, a giant zombie leapt out of the dark and blam. Suddenly Lia's character was down on the floor, twitching as the zombie began to eat her. "Well. I guess I'll be eating you later." She grumbled with a pout, lifting Aurora into her lap and huffing into her poofy white fur.

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

"Awwww!" Feli cooed, now scooting closer to Lia that Merlin wasn't wedged between them. "It's okay, Leelee, I'll protect you from the big bad zombies." Which... was going to be a lot easier said than done, considering the mob that showed up. Thankfully the grenades were enough to dispatch them, despite Lia's fearful squeaking as she ran away.

Felicity cheered when she thought they were safe, though the celebration was premature. Big fat daddy zombie decided that this would be the time to ruin the party and Feli just stared at the TV screen for a moment. "Oh... shit." Reflex had her shooting the thing, but she quickly ran out of ammo. "Oh no no no!" With Lia's character down, the zombie now focused on her, and Feli's fingers slipped on the joysticks as she tried to make her escape. "I'll avenge you! Uh... maybe!"

Unfortunately, by the time she found an ammo crate, not only did she have the attention of the gargantu-zombie, but also a collection of smaller ones. "... maybe not." It was only a matter of seconds before she, too, was dead. "God dangit!" She shouted, though smiling, then flopped back onto the couch. "Well, at least we lasted longer than the last time?"

She leaned over into Lia's side, taking Merlin and holding him in the crook of her arm. "So, what shall we have?" Feli looked thoughtful, stroking Merlin's pudgy tummy, his tail flicking contentedly back and forth.

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

Lia rested her cheek on Feli's shoulder as she comforted her. If there was a real zombie apocalypse, she was sure her wife would protect her with her epic hack and slash skills. Lia would just smother them with her boobs. Or run screaming off in her high heels and hope they daren't touch her beloved versace bag. Or there'd be HELL to pay.

"You can do it!" Ophelia cheered, clapping her hands now she was free of the controller. Her part of the screen was now covered in blood with "Player 2 Dead" in horrible font. "Oh my god his health bar is HUGE." She pouted, lifting Aurora up and wiggling the dog's paws. "That's not nice is it 'Rora? Would you bite the nasty zombies?" The little powderpuff of a dog wagged her lovely tail as if to say "Yes!"

When Feli was also doomed to death, Lia lightly tossed the controller on the ground and tucked up next to her. "Damn zombies, all pushy." She shook her head, then tangled her fingers with Felicity's, smiling. "Maybe one day we'll get to the end of the level." She piped up hopefully, before lightly kissing the blonde bombshell and resting her cheek on her shoulder. Nana finally lifted her head from the floor and looked up, before groaning and flopping back down.

"Such a hard life for our Nana-kins." Lia laughed, tucking up happily with the pets and her wife. Aurora rested her chin on Merlin's tummy, and the redhead chuckled. "Mm. Well, I was thinking we could do battered sweet and sour chicken with egg fried rice? I'll do the chicken bit." She smiled, closing her eyes. It did feel nice just to lean against her beautiful lover and have the warmth of their pets around them. "Love you Cici~"

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

Feli could only giggle at the comment about the health bar, "Do you think he's compensating for something?" But it wasn't long at all after that that a Game Over screen played on the TV and Feli set her controller on the coffee table. "Maybe, but I bet we'll have to die about fifty more times before we luck our way through it." She smiled nevertheless, closing her eyes for a moment to rest them, as she hadn't blinked hardly at all through that game.

"Someone should teach them some manners. You should ask before you start chewing on someone, it's just common decency." Felicity lectured, holding Lia's hands up to her mouth and pressing little butterfly kisses on her knuckles. She was perfectly happy just to cuddle with her wife for a while and even though the gurgling and moaning sounds from the game were still playing, she hardly heard them. The blonde dropped a kiss to the top of Lia's head, then released a happy sigh. "Oh I know, all that sleeping is just exhausting."

She freed one of her feet out from under the behemoth of a dog and used it to rub Nana's back. "That sounds good, but..." She trailed off, looking down at her wife. "... I kinda don't wanna move right now." She laughed softly, releasing Lia's hands in favor of folding the redhead in her arms. "I love you too, Leelee."

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

"Oh probably. I'm not the right girl to ask, but if I had to choose, I wouldn't go for the rotting cock." Lia laughed, wrinkling her nose. She ran a hand over her wife's cheeks, then eskimo kissed her nose and let out a sudden yawn. "I don't think my heart can cope with playing that game much more. It'll explode if I'm not careful." She pretended to collapse dramatically, only to get her face washed by a concerned Aurora.

She smiled brightly as she received the little kisses, nosing Feli then wiggling her hands. "I don't think zombies have the brains for manners, kitten." She said with a laugh, before giving Merlin a rub under the ear. "I'd love to wait, but I need my meds." Lia pouted, twisting her wrists around and wincing at the little clicking noise. "Else it'll be old lady time, and that's just no fun at all."

Giving Felicity a squeeze, she kissed her gently, then moved out from her arms. "You stay there and I'll get things started? I'll try not to burn the rice this time." She crossed her heart, then grinned, trotting in her fuzzy slippers over to the kitchen, snorting as the dogs suddenly looked interested. "Oh, I see. Only love me when I'm making eats?" She put her hands on her hips and tutted softly, before grabbing the packets out of the cupboards. "Then after we're done how about we play Fable 3? Decidedly less zombie rape."

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

"Your poor heart!" Felicity laid her hand over it, sounding and acting much more dramatic than need be. "Don't worry, if it explodes, I'll put it all back together for you!" She posed heroically, only to laugh and sink back into the cushions of the sofa. "I'd even use glitter glue, so it'd be all pretty." She smiled, kissing Ophelia's temple, then scratching behind Aurora's fluffy ears.

Felicity pursed her lips thoughtfully. "They have plenty of brains, considering they eat them." She teased, tickling under her wife's chin. "So really, they should be incredibly smart. They're just rude... and hungry." She looked down at the Saint Bernard still laying on her feet. "Like Nana. She's such a bull when she wants food." Feli's eyebrows drew together as Lia moved her wrists and reluctantly let her go. "Alright, I guess that's a decent enough reason to let you skip cuddle time, but you're making up for it later, missy." The blonde waggled her finger at Lia.

When the couch opened up, she stretched across it with Merlin in her arms, snuggling the tubby cat happily. "At least you love us no matter what we're doing, huh old man?" It took her a few minutes of summoning up willpower before she finally rolled off the couch to join Lia in the kitchen. "Oh I don't know, there's evil skeletons that pop out of nowhere." She nodded sagely, setting Merlin down on his little bed in the corner of the kitchen, then moved over to the sink to wash her hands. "Doggies are just hoping for some chicken, I'm sure. Greedy little... and not-so-little buggers."

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

"Yes, my poor, poor heart." Lia said sadly, pulling a deeply upset face. "How could I love you properly if it was in little bits?" She clasped a hand to her head and then swooned. "Oh Feli, you know the right things to say." A cheeky grin rose up on her face and she flung her arms around her wife, giving her a tender kiss.

As Lia began sorting out the chicken for her wife, she hummed to herself. "I reckon it just goes to their hips. Like when I eat chocolate cake." She mused with a chuckle, dipping the chicken expertly in the flour, before making the batter like Felicity had shown her so many years ago. This was pretty much the only thing she could cook without charring. She just did meat prep so she didn't hear the blonde women going Ew! Ew yuck ew oh my god in the kitchen. "I promise after we've eaten we can put on Up! and snuggle." She added, drawing a cross over her chest. "Cross my heart."

She did glance over her shoulder at Feli and smiled as she cuddled Merlin. "He loves us even more if we've got tuna." She said slyly, dipping each bit of chicken in the batter, then lying them down in the oily pan to fry. "Do my greedy puppadoos want chicken? Do they?" She said, taking a few tiny bits of chicken and throwing them at both Nana and Aurora, then taking an extra bit over to Merlin. "There you go chubbachump." She said gently, before joining Feli to wash her hands.

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

Smiling warmly at her wife, Felicity splashed a little water at her before flitting expertly about the kitchen, pulling out the necessary cookware, a box of rice, the bottle of soy sauce, and all the other necessary ingredients. "Thanks for touching the slimy dead chicken for me, babe." She chirped, kissing Lia's cheek as she passed by her. There was just something about raw meat that sent her skin to crawling, yet oddly enough once it was cooked she didn't mind at all.

Setting a pot to boil, Felicity busied herself with chopping up the onions and peppers while Lia handed out treats. "Oh now you've done it!' She warned with a laugh. "They're going to be after our dinner all night!" Nana already found her way over to Felicity's side, resting her chin on the counter and watched her intently. "This is nothing for you, big girl. Sorry. Go see Mama Leelee." She giggled, looking over her shoulder. "You know, if they had one of those collars from Up I can just hear it now. Food food food food!"

Felicity hummed while she worked, focusing on frying the rice up next, then gasped a little. "Oh, how did the employee hunt go?" She knew that her wife was after some new help at the shop, but she hadn't yet heard how the search had gone. Zombies were a bit distracting.

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

Dodging the water, Lia laughed and finished up dipping the chicken, before setting it in the oil of the pan that began to sizzle immediately. "Anything else you want me to do? I can whip up a batch of sweet and sour sauce?" She asked helpfully, bending down to kiss Nana's nose. "Who's a greedy girl?" She cooed, before grabbing the ketchup and a few other items, including a can of pineapple chunks.

"Oh I wish those collars did exist." Ophelia admitted, squeezing out ratios of sauces. "At least then we'd know what Aurora means when she does that whiny spin thing." She shrugged and then lent over to give her wife a kiss. "Uh oooooh~" She laughed, watching Merlin waddle his way across the kitchen counter to eye the frying chicken. "We've been surrounded." She laughed, shaking her head and resting her cheek on the blonde's shoulder.

"Oh? Uh, shockingly good." She knew her wife would chide her for hiring nearly an entirely student based work force. "Four girls applied. And one wants to live over the flat. Sweetest little group." She clapped her hands with glee. "There's Fiona, she wants to live in the flat. She's been to juvie but I think everyone deserves a second chance, and she seemed so ashamed the poor love. Then there's Dani, she's quite young so she'll be only working minimal time, but she had enthusiasm. And Aki, she looks like trouble." She chuckled. "And Sidra, who makes her own corsets. I'm letting her sell them in the shop."

She paused then in the mixing. "I want to get some adult employees though, else it's going to be awkward as all hell waiting for them to graduate and seeing if they want to stay on." She facepalmed. She was far too generous for her own good.

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

As Lia's head came to rest on her shoulder, Felicity lifted a hand to gently run through her wife's hair. "Careful. Last time he tried to jump in the pan, remember?" She nudged Merlin back from the stove and clicked her tongue at him. "Not for you, Merlie!" Pressing a kiss to Lia's temple, she moved away to lift the tubby cat off the counter and set him down on the floor.

Felicity focused on frying up the rice while Lia went into detail about the new girls she was employing, nodding her head and making little humming noises at appropriate intervals until Lia finished. "Yeah, you'll also have some scheduling issues with just students." At least Ophelia acknowledged that there were issues with the staff, but she trusted her wife to figure it out. One thing, though, tripped Felicity's trigger.

"You want to let a girl who went to juvie rent out the space above the shop?" She pointed her spoon at Lia, one hand on her hip. "And what's to stop her from stealing your inventory, or bringing shady people like drug dealers up to the place?" Lia was often too forgiving and not always a good judge of character. Felicity was worried about their investment and she didn't know what kind of person this Fiona was. She could have been a vandal, a thief, or any number of things. "I hope you didn't say yes."

She stirred the rice again, sighing, then leaned against the counter. "I'd like to meet her first. If she's as nice as you say she is, then she can have the place."

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

Moving her hand back and forth to get the consistency and taste of the sweet and sour right, Lia enjoyed the gentle sensation of her wife's fingers in her hair. "Don't remind me. He had burnt front paws." She waggled the spoon she was mixing the sauce with at Merlin with a tut. "Poor Mr. Tubbikins had paw owchies. You don't want the paw ouchies again, do you?" She sang, bending down to pet him as he trotted off in a huff that he wasn't getting any more chicken.

"Maybe some of the girls will stay on. That'd be nice." She said thoughtfully, setting the sauce to one side and flipping the chicken so it was golden on both sides. "The one girl, Sidra, I reckon between making her corsets and Peekaboo, she could do well for herself." She smiled, patting Felicity's hip cheekily, before frowning.

"Give her a break sweetie." She said with a huff, folding her arms and scowling. "She used her power on an officer of the law, nothing overly dramatic. And the fact she was up front and honest says a lot." Lia rolled her eyes, then took the finished chicken off the heat to drain on some kitchen towel. "I said that she'd need to convince you first about the apartment, so she's coming over at the weekend for a proper tenancy interview."

Wiping her hands off, she flicked the oven on and began raiding the cupboards for the chinese snack box they'd only bought recently. Once found, she set out the spring rolls, prawn toasts and other things on a baking tray and slid it in. "But she is getting the job, as long as she does well on training day. I just don't know many adults out of a job, or young adults that aren't at uni." She frowned a bit, and lent against the counter. "You will like her. I promise."

[Felicity Fitzgerald]

"I don't know about you, but I'd say that's pretty dramatic. The police force do very difficult jobs and work hard to keep people safe, that's why crimes against them are so serious. I wouldn't just brush that off." Of course, Felicity didn't know what this girl's power was, but it didn't matter. She had to be the grounded level-headed one when Lia was being too nice for her own good. At the same time, she understood that people made mistakes. She'd be willing to meet with the girl, then decide whether she was truly repentant or just trying to pull the wool over her too-trusting wife's eyes.

"That's fine." She breathed, catching Lia by the arm and tugging her over into a hug. "You know I just worry about you." Kissing the redhead's forehead, Felicity kept one arm around her as she reached behind her to stir the rice. She didn't need to look, she could go about the kitchen blindfolded.

But now wasn't the time for worrying. Now was a time for making dinner and smiling and just enjoying being together. "I guess you'll just have a high turnover rate then, but that's the retail business in a nutshell, isn't it?" She shrugged, trailing her fingers down Lia's side. "Now, about this girl that makes corsets, Sidra was it? I think I'd like to see some of her work. Preferably on you." She purred a little, kissing Lia lightly.

Turning off the stove under the pan of rice, Felicity was glad to let it sizzle for a while. "Now, come help me make the table." Nipping at Lia's ear, she pulled away, opening up the drawer for the silverware and passing it into her wife's hands.

[Ophelia Fitzgerald]

"I know, you should know I adore Charlie and I'd be totally heartbroken if someone did something nasty to him." Lia pouted, gently nudging the blonde with her nose. "But she did seem genuine, it's not me being soft, she seemed really ashamed." She wrung her hands, then began to load the dishwasher with the items she didn't need any more. After that was sorted, she smiled and rested her chin on her wife's shoulder and cuddling up on her.

Her lips tweaked in a smile and she nodded. "I know, but I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." The redhead grinned, then glanced over at the rice. "I wish it'd cook faster, I'm starving." She chuckled, then gave click of the tongue and opened the fridge.

"I don't mind, as long as I can get some hours off work to spend time with you." Lia smiled softly, then pulled out some beansprouts and sweet peppers. "Want me to cut these ready for the frying pan or no?" She offered, juggling the two bags over and nudging the door closed with her hip. "The girls are psyched about getting some free cupcakes and goodies." She added with a chuckle, peering at the rice again hopefully.

"I'd have to pay for a commission, and you know I feel weird in corsets most of the time. My boobs look like two angry watermelons trying to explode." Ophelia grumbled, then followed her wife over to the table, scooping Merlin as she went. "Mr. Chubbypuss likes boobie pillows~" She cooed, kissing the cat on the nose.