Roll Away Your Stone (Sean)

Sean knew it was Josh calling. Before answering the phone, he knew that it was Josh. Not due to a telepathy or a psychic hunch. And although he had expected that eventually the other man would resume communication – which was why he had not tried to restart it himself – that expectation was not the cause of his certainty.

He knew it was Josh because caller ID came standard with his telephone plan.

When the other man’s name and number popped up, the telepath turned off the television. It had only been the BBC – he usually watched news programs or the movie channel, particularly since one of the few scripted programs wouldn’t air new episodes until summer.

“Hello.” He waited for the other man to lead the conversation, in whatever direction he would. The telepath was unsurprised when Josh chose to dance around the topic. That impulse was what had led to the current state of their relationship. This was also why the intervention had been so misguided, believing that 1) Sean was the primary problem in this situation and 2) that Josh - who wanted to avoid the topic – would somehow open up when confronted by a group of people when he couldn’t do so privately. Perhaps one day they would have that conversation.

“You know how it is,” he replied, answering the other man’s question first instead of addressing the apology outright. By having a friendly conversation, he was tacitly forgiving the other man for the silent treatment. Of course, he had been frustrated by it, for two reasons: first, he had played no role in that disaster and understood that his friend was like a turtle when it came to how he coped with uncomfortable situations; and second, Sean was under a great deal of stress and Josh was part of his safety net. Being deprived of that hurt.

“The students had their pre-Valentine’s Day dance, and I spent it at the punch table, making sure nobody ruined the evening.” That had been the highlight of his week, sadly. “How have you been?”

The psychiatrist couldn’t conceive of a large enough faux pas to make him want to cut off all communication with Josh. He could barely stand how Kathleen was incommunicado, and yet he was saner for that.

Sean thought back to that dance. Of course the students hadn’t behaved. Even with a student to staff ratio of 5:2 and most of the security staff present as chaperones, they hadn’t behaved. Although a certain degree of misbehavior was expected – experience with students as a whole and individually taught him that – the students had gone above and beyond with their conduct. He might have to reconsider volunteering to chaperone at the next dance. “There were more than enough spats to render Valentine’s Day a failed experiment.” Although the other man couldn’t see him, Sean shook his head to himself at the memory. “I also had to listen to more Lady Gaga than I’ll ever need in life.”

Idly, he wondered who Josh had gone out with on Valentine’s Day, given that he hadn’t realized the holiday. It couldn’t have been his mother, since she would have mentioned the day. But Josh had stopped speaking to nearly his entire social circle – or so Sean assumed since Josh had stopped speaking to him. Perhaps he had gone out alone and that was how he met Miles. “He is nice,” the telepath agreed with that assessment. “I’m glad to have him aboard.” He had proven a good addition to the staff generally and to the mental health services department specifically.

Then came the admonishment for not visiting Josh’s mother. The telepath was as fond of her as she was of him, even if he had to be in the closet around her. “Honestly, I’d wanted to stop in with her for the holiday – I even bought her a present – but I didn’t want to impose.” Regardless of his relationship with her, she remained Josh’s mother, and when Josh had stopped speaking with him, Sean had retreated to give him whatever personal space he wanted. That included not going out to his family lest a premature meeting take place. “Tell her that I’ll stop by this weekend. I’ll even help her make kugel if she wants.” Or he’d take her shopping around Burlington since her eyes were going; she might want the help or at least the company.

“I’d like to get together soon.” That didn’t come off as too desperate, he hoped. It wasn’t as though Josh was unaware of where Sean stood in all this. He’d cross the hypothetical conversation when they got to it. “Are you free tomorrow night? Supper’s on me.”

How had his life been? Lonely and stressful. That was the pattern these days. Then he had a thought. “I don’t know if you’ve seen, but there are these union protests out in Wisconsin. I’ve had the urge to catch a flight and join in. Take that as you will as indication of my mental state.”