i'm a boy [open]

[Rivers Deveaux]

Upon his arrival at school, he felt his stomach swirl and then grow tight into a ball as he dragged his rolling backpack along with a heavy duffel bag into the back hallways. There were still several boxes his belongings left to put into the elevators, but two of the staff members had that under control so far. As a few passerbyers strollers through the hallways, he felt their eyes on his back. He turned around to say hello, but the kids were already gone by the time he decided to make a move.

He unlocked the door to his dorm, feeling relived yet sad that he didn't have a roommate. At least he had all this space to himself, but it would be a bit more tedious making friends without a roommate to fill the void. He thanked the two personnel for pushing the rest of the boxes in and gave them a charming smile. Rivers groaned and walked towards the large window next to the empty desk near his bed, pulling it upwards to open it.

From outside of his window he could see the courtyard with a dozen students roaming around. It was three o'clock on Saturday and he was jet lagged from a thirteen hour trip, putting the palms of his hands into his face. Another loud groan erupted from him and he collapsed on his bed.

When he woke it was already eight pm, his stomach growling like a large bear. "Ugh, so hungry.." He could really go for a sandwich at the moment. He would usually change immediately after getting up, but he was too hungry to care. He wore the same clothes: a white v neck, corduroy heather gray blazer, and black slacks.

Rivers had no trouble finding the cafeteria since he could smell the food from the elevator. The smell of what hinted like roast beef excited his stomach, causing it roar even more. He rubbed it slightly and went quickly into the cafeteria, ordering his roast beef with mashed potatoes with a side of yellow corn. "Thank you." he said to the woman behind the glass counter as he scanned the spacious room for a suitable place to sit.

Most of the tables were filled with people so he went the solo route for a lone table towards the right of all the folks with friends. Steering himself to a table he sat and opened his bottle of water, taking a few small sips before biting into his mashed potatoes. It was good, but he wasn't necessarily caring about the taste since he felt so starved. As he gobbled down the food he couldn't help but feel the isolation creeping on. He looked up at all the other tables, filled with others like him chatting away and laughing loudly only wishing he was there.

[Ann Hudgins]

School didn't totally suck now. She had made pretty good friends with Devin, or at least she thought so, from their time at the mall, though Ann didn't really know what the 'next step' was. She didn't have a cell phone and she was way too nervous about the whole thing to wonder the halls until she ran into her again. She wasn't sure how it worked, but that just seemed like the wrong approach to it. Maybe they'd just cross paths accidentally again and Ann need not worry about it?...Ann, not worry about something? Yeah. Okay.

She'd been going through roommates so much lately, she wasn't even sure if she had roommates anymore. She used to not want nothing to do with them, but know that she had been trying to socialize (and partially failing at it), she didn't have any roommates to do that with. Maybe some day soon she'd get one that she could get along with. Hopefully. It was a long shot, but Dr. Neville had instilled in her that she needed to keep her mind positive so her powers don't focus on the negative emotions. It was pretty great advice because now that she had been trying new things and stuff, she'd been absorbing the happy things instead of the stressed and negative things.

Progress was still slow with her trainers, but she hadn't expected an overnight fix anyhow.

And now she was headed towards the cafeteria, because humans gotta eat sometime, even the metas (unless they absorb through photosynthesis or something). She had usually skipped out on lunch and dinner and arrived early for breakfast (because there were less students there) or she'd just get there when they were about to close. But for a long time (and still even today) her powers upset her stomach and caused a bit of...problems. Hopefully, though, after all of Ms. Vasiliev's lessons, she's gotten the handle on that and Ann need not worry about starving again.

The line was short to get her food of whatever they were serving. Ann still didn't have the muscle to talk to the lunch ladies and be picky about what she was going to eat. The way she looked at it was that the women behind the glass knew what they made and what was good for her. And they had never given Ann anything she just couldn't eat, so Ann didn't upset the system by being picky. After she had her food she moved automatically to the very back, where it was usually always deserted because who in there right mind wanted to sit alone?

Ann knew she needed to get out of this routine, but she was safe in her routine, and she didn't yet trust herself around so many people--so many emotions. She didn't know if her energy shields could keep it up. So she moved to sit in her seat she always sat in, only instead of sitting alone in her usual seat, there was a guy sitting down the table from her, looking everywhere else a bit longingly. She started to eat her food and tried to look like she didn't mind him there, but she was acutely aware of the wanting he was letting out. She could tell he was lonely too, and wanted something different. She just couldn't bring herself to say anything. Talking and making friends with a girl stranger was one thing.

But this was a boy.

[Rivers Deveaux]

As he dug into his mashed potatoes he used his free hand to rub his tired eyes from the lengthy plane ride to Vermont. A yawn was making its way into his mouth but he held it back to keep himself from making an ugly face with hald chewed mushes of food in his mouth. After swallowing the clumps of mashed potatoes into his mouth he gulped down some water and then yawned with his hand covering his mouth. He looked up occassionally, letting his eyes wander around the cafeteria. There were international flags postered up around the walls of the room. Immediately the Japan flag caught his eye, a small smile tugging the corners of his lip.

He knew he would get homesick, but not this soon. He had two homes: one with his parents and one at the school for meta-humans in Japan. The weird thing was that he felt more at home at school than with his mother. It wasn't like she neglected him or anything, but his whole life there wasn't a single father figure for him to look up to until he arrived at school, quickly becoming the favorites of his teachers. After watching some documentary about "broadening horizons in college" he was so determined to get out of the country. He had never been in the U.S. and maybe it was time for a change of pace and scenery. It was time to start a new chapter in his life since his parents would be too busy tending to their newborn son.

Even though this was his choice to transfer to Hammel, he would soon be missing Japan more than he thought he would. His focus moved from the flags to his plate of food, picking at the corn momentarily before shoving it into his mouth. He probably looked like a rabid pig at the moment since he was eating so fast. It wouldn't be surprising to him if all of a sudden he got a stomach ache-- he had a sensetive stomach.

After the corn was gone he looked around the room again, noticing a girl at the table closest to him sitting alone. In an attempt to possibly make a friend he couldn't help but smile and wave at her, hoping she'd respond back to him.

[Ann Hudgins]

Looking at her food for the first time, Ann discovered she had roast beef and mashed potatoes with gravy, a side of green beans, and a small whole wheat roll. She smiled a little at the home-cooked meal feeling it gave off. It made the food that much more delicious. Now, Ann wasn't the type to linger in the room so she picked off her green beans first, because she didn't particularly like them. She always saved her favorite for last, because if she ate what she liked first, then she wouldn't eat the rest of it and then not eat the entire meal. So if she didn't want to be starving by the next meal, then she needed a full plate.

She felt a yawn work it's way up her throat just as a slightly overpowering sense of homesickness washed over her. She nearly choked on her drink of water because of it, but she got herself under control before she brought attention to herself. She held in her coughs which caused her diaphragm to twitch and her whole body jerked a bit. She'd rather deal with the momentary pain then have people look at her while she coughed. Once her body was sure it wasn't drowning on a mouthful, she relaxed in the seat. Her mind drifted back to her home because someone sitting near her was missing theirs.

Her parents; waking up at the crack of dawn for work. Her father leaving the house at precisely six fifteen, her mother leaving at six thirty. She usually woke up on her own to an empty house and then rode her bike with the other kids in the neighbor to the school down the street. She got home at the same time her parents did, she only had enough time to do homework and then it was off with her best friend, Aiden, to go to the martial arts gym that they participated in. She trained there for an hour, ate with him at a nearby restaurant and then went home, showered and stayed in her room until bedtime. That was her routine everyday. And then when she got her powers... Her parents couldn't look her straight in the eye anymore.

When the Hammel recruiter picked her up, they hadn't tried to make contact with her since. It's been three years and Ann hadn't gotten any word at all from them. She'd given up on them half way through sophomore year and since then tried to not think about them ever. It wasn't really fair that she was missing them after all they had done (and not done) for her. She scuffed her foot on the floor and then remembered her exercises. She could get rid of it! She just had to remember what to do. She narrowed her eyes in concentration and looked at the gravy pooled in her mashed potatoes. After a moment, she closed her eyes and drew in a deep breath.

The brunette was hunched over with horrible posture, but people with no self esteem generally slumped all the time, and meditated for a moment. Her chakras became warm inside her and she could feel the homesickness messing up her flow. She imagined a shell of energy around it, and started to move it up her chakras, just like practice. Only this time it wasn't calm she was trying to move, it was homesickness and all the other emotions it kicked up from the dirt; betrayal, abandonment, frustration, anger, loathing, and loss. They were all too wired in side her for her to pick them apart and lift them out. Her brow was furrowed as she tried to at least get rid of the homesickness, but it was tethered and wasn't going anywhere.

She opened her eyes in defeat and sighed, her chin came to rest on her palm as her elbow sat next to her plate of half eaten food. She looked around the room, gloomy as the rest of her emotions corroded away at what little good mood she was in. That was when the boy she had noticed earlier and had almost been tempted to talk to smile and waved at her like a friend. She smiled little ghost of a smile and waved the fingers that were curled around her cheek. She mixed the gravy into the mashed potatoes with her other hand.

[/justify]

[Rivers Deveaux]

Rivers actually saw his father for the first time in nearly three years since he was away at school. He didn't really know much about his father other than the fact that he was an anthropologist and the fact that his dad liked to send a lot of useless cards from the countries he traveled. Rivers never gave much thought to the cards because if his father really cared for his family, why couldn't he have chosen another profession when he knew he had a family to take care of at home? The whole concept of family puzzled him since he spent most of his childhood alone and making trouble everywhere he went. He made trouble because he was bored and lonely. The only time his mom ever spent with him was to dress him up in clothes to put on her clients and models since he was so tall for a boy his age already. He dressed in the clothes his mother picked out for him on a daily basis, so he was sharply dressed and it didn't mean shit at the time when he was fourteen since he didn't care whatsoever.

There was always a sense of betrayal that lingered upon him in the family. Rivers isn't one to hold grudges, but he in some ways still feels betrayed by his parents for the way he was brought up. Betrayed that his mother was not reluctant to send him away. He remembered vividly about the day the recruiter approached the house. The recruiter was a five foot somethin' japanese guy in a polo shirt and slacks. He watched from inside the hotel room as his mother discussed with the man outside right by the window. His life was never the same after that.

But he quickly recalled his first week he was at meta-human school back home he could barely conjure up tiny fireballs; now he spit waves of flames with his fingers. The most important thing he learned was on the very first day: one could not harness the power of flames with anger and feelings of betrayal. It took him months to nearly a year to completely concentrate and mold those feelings of anger into a complex form of what he knew best and what he should be doing. He put his all into controlling his powers and after three years he had learned most of what there was to learn.

Still he yearned for more because he believed that learning was a never ending process and began to think of what the training rooms looked like around Hammel since he had only seen the hallway leading to his dorm and the cafeteria so far. Wasn't much of a sight, but maybe he would do some exploring after his finished with his meal. He gobbled down some bits of roast beef and sipped his water, making eye contact with the girl again. After swallowing he smiled again almost too excitedly as she waved back. She waved so that meant a possibility of a friend he hoped?

"Hey how's it going?" he said, raising his voice so she could hear him. A bland line to escape his lips, but it's what just popped out of his mouth without even processing the words in his brain.

[Ann Hudgins]

Ann's parents, when she was very little, did their best to spend time with her despite their jobs. Her father was in the Marines, therefor had to go onto the military base for whatever reason everyday, so Ann didn't really remember seeing him a lot when she was really little (because she went to sleep before he got home), and her mom owned and ran a pretty cool bookstore/ cafe that helped the cash flow. Ann's mother wasn't the most compassionate woman, but when they were raising her, they both went out of their way to spread some love to their only child.

When she was about six and could play with the neighborhood kids, they stopped trying so hard, figuring she'd get the right amount of attention elsewhere. As Ann grew up, they continued to not go out of their way anymore and before Ann knew it, it was like she had roommates instead of parents. She didn't blame them, though, because Ann never asked for that attention she almost wished she had again. She just...went with it. But then when she always got a headache when her parents bickered, or complained because the new couple across the street was fighting, well it was like Ann reached a hand into her skull and pulled out her brain.

And then the recruiter showed up. A thin man, who's eyes always darted to the pictures on the wall. They didn't like him because he represented everything they didn't want Ann to be, but had no power over, and had threatened the man that Ann wasn't going to the school but the man talked them out of that. Ann left with the man the next day and hasn't heard a peep from them since. They took her cell phone away that night the man came and since Ann had no other income, she hasn't so much as held a phone in...quite some time. When Ann meets them again, she had been thinking of showing them just what their freak of a daughter could do. She'd have them experience a fraction of what she had to suffer through alone because they couldn't accept her for who she was--for what she was. She knew that definitely wasn't a high road, but she didn't care. Parents shouldn't do that to their children, period.

As her powers came into full fruition at Hammel, she was completely immersed in the teenaged hormone roller coaster with a bit of confused identity(from the freshmen) and she more or less drowned in it and got swept away from it. She couldn't focus for anything, couldn't think clearly long enough to form a sentences and she was more suicidal than anyone you've ever met. It took a long time for her to build any sort of immunity towards the...vast amount of emotions she absorbed everyday. A when she thinks back on it, she is surprised she never snapped and went crazy.

She placed a forkfull of mashed potatoes in her mouth and swallowed, going back to eating from that brief...whatever it was from the boy. When he spoke, however, she looked up in surprise. She met his eyes, seeing that she was the one he was talking to. Her first question was, why, but then she looked around, hoping no one had turned around to look at the two of them. She didn't think this talking between tables was a good thing. (Notice how she still wanted to talk to him.)

"Ah, erm, fine." She replied, obviously surprised and a bit embarrassed. She glanced around again and then back up at him. "You?"

[/blockquote]

[Rivers Deveaux]

When Rivers was in Japan, making friends came easy to him. It was probably because his looks didn't quite fit in with everyone elses. His whole life he grew up in an all asian environment, yet he had no problems making friends since everyone was so welcoming. It was like everyone wanted to befriend him and be friends with the guy who looked like a total outsider. It was strange how things worked that way, but it he felt truly at home since the first week he arrived. He was the only caucasian person at school and he didn't ever take much notice to it until he was sixteen as his sense of surroundings matured. Being of a different race never bothered him; it was just what he had become accostomed to the past years and now that he was in a more diverse environment, it was a little more tedious to adjust and easily find friends than it was across the country.

And everytime he mentioned to his peers that he could speak french they would ecstatically demand that he spoke a sentences in french. For some reason everyone swooned over this, both guys and girls. He bathed in the attention and the good thing was, he wasn't some egotistic jerk who just wanted to get laid and make money like some fictional characters on the CW (which was everyone's favorite channel for some reason except him). But he was simply him. His maturity developed swiftly as did his powers, determined that he would gain most control of his body spiritually and physically.

In his mind he expected that people in the hallways wouldn't stand and mutter with their friends as he walked by. He had this clip on replay in his mind that everyone would smile and wave at Rivers, introducing themselves friendily as he entered the building without a doubt that they were all going to be good friends one day. The whole idea of that was over the top and silly to be thinking about, but everyone must have thought or felt that way at some point in their lives? He thought that maybe if he was able to make more friends soon, it would raise his spirits. but seeing that today was his first day, he was way too tired from jet lag to even really engage in a conversation with someone.

Still to his surprise he managed to speak a sentence out to a complete stranger. So far it wasn't looking too bad for him, but he still felt thing pang of stupidity for yelling at the other table. the other tables weren't paying attention or anything, but Rivers wished he could speak to her without shouting. He inhaled a nervous breath and picked up his tray, walking to the girl's table. Maybe she would think he was weird or maybe she would like his company. Either way he still wanted to be in someone else's company since he didn't have a roommate.

"I'm good. Didn't mean to shout or anything earlier." he said, letting out a small chuckle. "I'm Rivers by the way.." he said with a warm smile, holding his hand out.

[Ann Hudgins]

Her high school career was spent running from class room from class room, never looking anyone in the eye and never making skin contact with anyone. No handshakes or high fives or hugs or anything else. Her roommates, when she first arrived, all tried their best to help her transition from being a normal preteen going to a public school to being a meta teenager going to a private school easier. She didn't appreciate it then, and did her best to avoid them at all costs because whenever they felt bad for her, she was effected by that and then felt bad for herself. It was terribly confusing and sometimes for days at a time, Ann didn't really know who she was. She was little bits of everyone else.

She'll never forget her first day of school. She walked into the classroom and the teacher gave her a comforting pat on the back, his fingers just barely made contact to the skin of her neck and she crumbled to the ground like she was electrocuted. When she was touched by him, she sucked in every single emotion he was feeling at that precise second. It filled every corner of her mind and for that second she was him, emotionally. She'd never gotten over it, and those students that were in that class, at the time, still snicker at her when she walks past. That teacher probably hadn't forgiven himself either. But she can't blame him, because he had no idea about the new student.

Anyway, that moment was what solidified her fear of touching. For a while that fear only kept her safe from getting close to people, but now that she was really working to overcome her power, her training exercises were harder than necessary because of that fear that is so ingrained in her person. It was her survival instinct. She couldn't really do much to get over it, though. The experience was just as excruciating now as it was then, only now she could keep herself separated from the other's emotions, but not by much. Though there was hope on the horizon, because of Mr. Collier's persistence in that aspect of her powers. That was pretty much all he focused on, actually. They mediated for about ten minutes and then she would touch the back of his hand for as long as she could and still keep herself to herself. The longest she had made it was ten seconds. But only because of Mr. Collier's own powers and how he could keep his emotions perfectly calm the entire time.

It was almost cheating and Ann didn't really consider it a victory, but she was mostly negative and hated doing it in the first place. She was drawn out of her mind, however, when the boy picked up his tray and started to walk towards her. She was pretty much welded to her seat, staring at him as he took the seat across from her. Breath. She ordered herself, but she seemed to have forgotten how to do that. Inhale, then exhale, Ann. She chanted to herself and finally drew in a shaky breath.

"Oh it's--don't worry about it." Ann told him offhandedly to his shouting apology. She just had a problem with attention, is all. Of course she wasn't about to admit that (though it might just be too obvious anyway). She smiled a little as he introduced himself and then held his hand out to shake.

Uh-oh.

"Oh..mm. Sorry, Rivers...I can't shake your hand. My powers...it's just....impossible." She looked down at her plate and pushed the roll from one of the food holding squares to the next, feeling like a total tool. "Er...I'm Ann." She added, only remembering after she started to wallow in her reoccurring misery. A part from feeling horrible from having to decline a perfectly friendly handshake, she was shocked and surprised he had picked himself up from his seat and came over to talk to her. Because, well, that's never happened before. Ever.

[/justify]

[Rivers Deveaux]

After awhile, Rivers realized that being a meta-human meant being more human than anyone else could see. Even thought he had the power to manipulate and create fire, he was still an average teenager who dealt with the same problems as everyone else. He had family troubles, relationship conflicts, and even problems with school work. Back in Japan the school not only taught one how to manage their powers, but also subjects such as literature, science, philosophy, philosophy, and a whole wide range of subjects. Critical thinking wasn't his favorite, but the class had him discovering that he was not just a meta-human, he was Rivers and no one had the right to take that away from him.

Luckily, the meta-human schools were so tight and clandestine, no dangers have presented themselves to the teens and adults there. It surprised him though. He had seen X-Men a few times when he was younger and the thoughts of the school being invaded by evil forces crossed his mind several times. The teachers always assured that nothing like that would ever happen, but who really knew? There must be others watching out for the school. And what about the government? They must have some secret tab on meta-human schools or know something about why these "people" would need to be put in a discreet school.

He even wrote an essay about how meta-human schools were being kept under a watchful eye by the FBI. The topic rose a few heated discussions during class, but Rivers received an A- on the paper which the teacher almost refused to let him turn in. He deemed it as inappropriate which was ridiculously idiotic. It was a speech class, so shouldn't he have the place to talk about whatever he wanted? He brought it up with the office (this happened last year) and eventually things worked through. The teacher ended up liking what was on paper surprisingly. He really dreaded speeches, but that class gave him more confidence than he could imagine. It seemed that his classmates adored and admired him for being so bold as they would say.

So making friends was not a problem there. Now he was on the other side of the world, struggling to even make a friend. The girl wasn't as cooperative as he thought she would be in making conversation. He wasn't mad at her, but a little angered at himself for thinking he may have did something wrong to offend her. When she explained her situation, he immediately tried to empathize.

"Oh...I wasn't aware." he replied, quickly realizing he would have to do something fast if he still wanted to make a friend. "Well how about I just nod and you nod so it's kinda like we shook hands, but not..we just shook heads?" he said, furrowing his brows as how stupid he must sound.

[Ann Hudgins]

Ann was never in a position to think of being meta as anything positive at all. In her mind, she had nothing going for her because of it. For one, she had to move away from everything she knew; secondly, it made her parents loath her, maybe even fear her; thirdly, it isolated her from everyone else and made her handicap in most situations; and fourthly, it made her miss out on too many things to count. She still didn't even consider herself special in a good sense. She was odd and different and weird; all with the worst connotation possible. It was something that was getting better though, not that she had started to behave slightly how a teenager should, she was feeling better in general. Who knew friends curbed depression like that?Ann didn't or she would have tried a long while ago.

In the classroom, Ann was sure to never do anything noteworthy, or speak out, or to write an amazing (or opinionated) conversation that would spark her having to do anything with all eyes of the class focused on her. For one, she was too shy deep down, but all that concentrated emotional energy on her was something she was sure she couldn't handle. She paid attention as much as she could in class, but she mostly just ended up rocking slowly in her chair with her eyes shut trying to force out the other people's silly little emotions. Her grades were only as good as they were because she had a lot of time by herself after school and spent them rereading over whatever material was covered in class. It wasn't a very spicy life, but it was what Ann could deal with, and what she was limited to doing.

Whenever a topic of discussion came up that pertained to meta's being hunted by everyone else, Ann did her best to keep the conflicting opinions away from her. She considered herself to be a meta that should be locked away somewhere just because how much of a freak she was, but she didn't actually wish that on anyone else. At those times, she probably would have willingly signed herself up as some sort of lab experiment, just to get away from the masses and put under the needle by sociopathic surgeons who had no emotions. It was a good thing she never admitted to that, right? It would have alienated her that much more.

She sensed his anger at himself because of her stiff reply, and immediately she wanted to apologize over it, but she knew that bringing attention to something that was personal, to him, wouldn't end well. She looked down at her potatoes and mentally told him she was sorry. It was the thought that counts? She smiled a little bashfully at what he suggested with the nodding heads and she complied. "Nice to meet you." She said, that smile still on her face. "I haven't seen you around before." Like that was much of a surprise. Ann didn't know anyone. "Did you transfer here from somewhere?" She asked a little curiously because he didn't seem to be a Freshmen, and there weren't many people that arrived at the school past the age of fifteen, which meant he transferred from somewhere overseas?...Which would explain that wave of homesickness she felt a little bit ago. Honestly, that made her even more curious than she had a right to be.