Crazy Love, Vol II (Josh)

[Joshua Bernstein]

"Of course. I wouldn't spring a surprise vacation on you." Josh laughed, taking a bite of his crab. He couldn't take off work at will like that, not unless something serious had happened, and he knew that with Sean's responsibilities he couldn't pick up and go, either.

He mimicked the other man's movement, reaching for his own wine with a frown. "But that's awful." He was aware through personal experience just how corrupt and lazy the court system could be, and the police and everyone else associated with it, but he couldn't quite bring himself to believe that Greg had been condemned simply for being the lover of the man who had been killed. If he even was.

"No, I know keeping up with him wouldn't have changed anything, but I just...I feel bad for not talking to him, and now I can't even invite him over for the summer. He might not want to, though, he was sort of protective of you after we broke up."

At least, that was how Josh had read it, though it was possible he'd misinterpreted Greg's intentions. He was known to do that on occasion.

"I didn't think he wanted anything to do with me, so...."

So he'd stopped seeking out Greg's company, which was made easier by the fact that they were neither in the same grade nor the same year, though they were in the same social circle thanks to Greg's early introduction. Josh had spent less time with the campus radicals and more time with adult demonstrations after the breakup, as well, feeling awkward about running into Sean despite having extended the offer to remain friends. It had taken a few months before he felt normal about hanging out again. Not entirely normal, but normal enough. And Sean hadn't seemed to hate him for breaking their relationship off, anyway, which had been what he'd feared the most.

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“It is awful,” Sean agreed with a nod, but he was long familiar with anti-meta bias and the general disdain for the rights of the accused in recent years. “But he is the obvious suspect, forensic evidence was sloppy at best and the trail has probably gone cold by now. And what does it matter that I’m well-respected in the community? I’m his old college friend and could lie and get away with it, so my testimony is suspect. Finding impartial telepaths is hard since we’re rare and the police try to snap them up...” He sighed then, depressing himself.

Their social circle had, for the most part, all remained in the city, even after the older students had graduated, since many of them had sought out nearby employment or pursued higher education in nearby schools. Sean and Columbia medical school, Greg and his Masters program, Daphne and her Ph.D., Josh and law school…by the time of the breakup, they were “adults” but they still all spent time together in the same area, even if life was slowly driving them in other directions.

And when the breakup happened and Sean thought he would break down, his first instinct had been to drive to Pilot Ridge and talk to Robert about it until he was calm. After that, he had talked to Greg, who had, admittedly, become protective of him because Sean had looked like he might die and Josh was the cause

Greg had forgiven him, of course, but he had known Sean longer and the telepath had been in worse shape.

Sean sighed softly and looked over at the other man. “Admittedly, he was protective of me, but he saw me at almost the worst of it and it was to be expected. He didn’t want to cut you out.” Sean had, of course, had discussions with Greg about this at the time and later and then by correspondence in recent months because jail provided endless time for reflection.

The telepath shook his head and continued, “I’m sure he would be happy to see you again, under better circumstances.”

When he was freed.

[Joshua Bernstein]

"I know why. I just don't think it's right." Josh heaved a sigh and returned to pushing his crab around on his plate in disappointment at the system he was working within. It had been broken and imperfect when he'd been a child, it had been broken and imperfect when he'd chosen to study law, and it remained broken and imperfect. There were improvements here and there, but never the massive overhaul of the system he'd dreamed of when he'd first met Greg. Nothing that could help their vivacious, charming college friend.

Josh had never realized that there were any fears about Sean dying, because they had never discussed The Break Up, and also because avoided the other man during the worst of it in an effort to give him space. Because he had needed space, and he'd assumed that the telepath did, as well, and neither of them had gotten any when they'd been living together.

"You're probably right, but at the time I thought he was going to yell at me every time he saw me. If he'd been a more violent person I would have thought he'd punch me." But he hadn't even done that, so of course he wouldn't have committed murder.

"I wish I could help, but I know that our association wouldn't reflect well on my sincerity, either."

The comment about better circumstances caused a wry smile. "I hope we do. When he gets out," because he had to, because life had happy endings and he had to believe that, "we should invite him up here, what do you think?"

[Dr. Sean Neville]

The telepath sighed again and reached to crack open a crab leg. “It isn’t right. But there’s not much we can do while the system irons itself out.” Except provide moral support, which Sean was doing through letters and the occasional visit.

It was frustrating, because this same legal system that condemned his friend so vigorously had done nothing to stop Gabriel Underwood when the latter was alive and was actually a terrorist. Instead, the system had been content to let disaster occur. But he let it go, because those thoughts would ruin the evening and he didn’t want that. He wanted to enjoy the rest of this night, wanted to avoid a depressed episode on the eve of their reconciliation.

The fears of his death had been exaggerated, because he wouldn’t ever, but he had looked sickly, and he’d become listless and sad, which had been a shock to everyone who hadn’t known him during his time at Hammel. Greg had worried; other friends had worried. But Sean had survived because nobody had ever died of a broken heart, not even a telepath. He’d felt better, once Josh had begun talking to him again, and he had learned that being friends wasn’t a brush off. Had learned that Josh still intended to actually be friends. That had helped.

The telepath ate some of the crab meat and then shook his head. “He wouldn’t have.” It was easy to say that in hindsight.

However, his expression also shifted to a smile, and he nodded in agreement. “We should. For as long as he wants or needs to stay.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

Josh didn't want to discuss The Break Up in any more depth than they had earlier on the ride here, at least not tonight. Perhaps later they would, because they were supposed to be communicating and it was possible there was more to say or confess to there, though he wasn't fond of the idea.

Nor did he want to depress both of them with talk of Greg, as guilty as he felt for being unable to provide assistance. At least, discussing Greg's current plight was depressing. Discussing him visiting for any length of time was much more pleasant.

As long as he wanted or needed to stay was potentially a long time, but Sean had plenty of spare rooms. And..."If my house hasn't sold or rented by then I suppose he could use it. If he'd rather have some space instead of rooming with us."

That was a weird thought, that anyone staying with Sean was now staying with them. It hadn't been weird when he was younger, but after decades of living on his own it felt a little strange to change from singular to plural. Strange, but not unwelcome.

"He'll have to meet Riley and Danny." Maybe Riley would bake him a pie, that was always welcome. He said nothing about Cobalt, because he knew that Cobalt and Sean didn't get along exactly rather than because he didn't think Greg should befriend the other attorney. He absolutely thought that Cobalt would at least sympathize with his plight enough to be relatively polite.

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Eventually, Sean believed they would have to have further discussion about the Break Up, in the interest of sharing, but not tonight. Tonight they had said enough.

The telepath nodded in agreement with that proposition. While Sean’s house- soon to be their house – was big enough for several other people without getting in the way (living with L.C. had proven that this past year), it was different living with a couple than it was staying with a friend, even if the couple were your friends. Moreover, that would depend on whether Greg wanted to visit or to stay or he even wanted to remain in the U.S.

If Sean had been in a similar position, the moment he was released, he would relocate to Canada without hesitation. He couldn’t fault Greg if he did the same and never looked back. But if he did come to visit or stay, “I’m sure he would appreciate the offer. Although if he stayed with us, he’d get the benefit of 2:00a.m. cake and drinking contests.”

Musing on hypotheticals was pleasant enough, and thus Sean indulged him. “He would like Riley and Danny. Particularly Danny; he’d probably flirt with Danny.” Theoretically possible, assuming Greg was no longer in mourning. There were times when Sean and Greg shared taste in men.

Greg was perceptive; he’d notice that Cobalt didn’t like Sean because the short lawyer did nothing to hide that, and he...quite likely wouldn’t take well to that because Greg was nothing if not loyal. But that, too, was a hypothetical for another time. “And Anya. He would adore Anya.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

"True." Josh conceded, cheering up enough to turn his attention to oysters. That was the reason he'd suggested this platter, after all! "And heaven knows none of the radicals could ever turn down cake or drinking, especially not together."

He didn't think he would mind having Greg as a house guest for a bit; it would be like college again, except they were older and no longer did marijuana and Greg had more reason to stay out of police notice so they probably couldn't disrupt anything with urgent protests.

But they could still drink too much and sit around discussing how to solve all the problems of the world, and Greg could flirt with all the single men.

Like Danny. And Riley, for that matter, though Sean would know better than Josh why Greg would prefer one man over the other. Not that he was intending to introduce his Pilot Ridge friends to Greg solely so that Greg could chat them up, but that was what the architect did.

"Everyone adores Anya." He returned, although he hadn't talked much with her lately, not since before Sean had been discharged from the hospital, in fact. "Is she back? I thought she was visiting her family in Russia."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

The telepath finished with the crab meat on his plate and refilled it with another serving of lobster and oysters from the platter. He smiled, because it brought back memories to hear their group of friends referred to as the radicals again, like when they were younger. He didn’t refer to their college friends that way since nobody who hadn’t been a part of their group would understand. But it was pleasant nostalgia. “Those were the least of our vices, if you recall. But cake and a bottle of scotch would do him nicely, I think; since he doesn’t have access to either right now.”

It would be nice to have Greg around, if he chose to visit. They could talk aloud without worrying about surveillance. And he could play charmingly domestic for the other man, if he wanted. And complain about politics.

And go out to clubs and flirt while Sean sat and drank scotch pretending not to watch. Actually, if they did that on a Friday night while Josh was visiting his mother, it would be exactly like back when they were students.

The telepath nodded in agreement. Not only did all adults love Anya – students less so because of her stern reputation – but he had been grateful to have her by his side during recent disaster. “She’s back, and in one piece. Thankfully because we’ve needed her.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

"The least of our vices, but the ones most likely to have stuck." Josh rejoined between mouthfuls of oyster. "Can't really see Greg agreeing to a sit in at the Capitol anytime soon, not with his face all over the news." Not when he now had a very dangerous record for someone involved in protests.

"I can't imagine not having access to cake or scotch," That was very close to his idea of torture. He was aware that there were countries were Greg would have been treated worse, that didn't excuse anything. They were Americans! They were supposed to be more civilized than to deny someone cake and scotch based on faulty evidence and laziness and assumptions. They weren't supposed to toss people into prison and lock away the key without proving their guilt, either, and Greg wasn't guilty so they couldn't have proven it.

"We'll have to make sure there's cake every day the entire time he stays." Because he'd gotten it into his head now that Greg not only would be released (he had to be or there was no justice in this world) but that he would agree to come visit.

"Really? When did she return? I would have thrown her a welcome back party had I known." Then, after a good look at the expression on Sean's face coupled with his words of gratitude towards the Russian woman, "Her help must be invaluable."

He took another sip of wine before smiling. "I'm glad you have such wonderful coworkers. It would be nice if Greg or Daph would move here. Maybe I'm feeling nostalgic." He waved his fork in the telepath's direction chidingly, "And that's your fault, you know, this...trying again....it makes me think of college. Except hopefully I'm a little smarter now."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“No, if I were him I would stay as far from the Capitol as possible.” Sean had always been the most cautious of their circle of friends, but Greg didn’t have a death wish.

And Sean didn’t have it in him to discuss the further flaws of the justice system and how it failed expectations, not tonight. Thus he didn’t comment on the other man’s thoughts. Instead he simply agreed, “If he comes up, I’ll be sure to stock up on both for his visit.” That was easily done, considering the liquor stores and the bakeries around.

“A while ago.” Sean didn’t have access to the exact date at the moment, and it was inconsequential. What mattered is that she was here, and she had helped mitigate the disaster of his last Sexual Education Talk, for what good that had done. “And her help is invaluable; I’m frequently grateful to have her there.” He had told her this recently, and it remained true.

The telepath pried open the additional oysters while he listened to Josh’s reminiscence, and then his explanation for why. That caused him to shake his head slightly. “You were smart then.” He sighed and set down his fork, reaching across the table with his hand for one of Josh’s. He didn’t get into the fact that it was Josh who had proposed trying again; instead he focused on what was, to him, the more important matter. “I don’t want to get into this now because this supper is a celebration, but what you did was...understandable given how young we were.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

"You know, I meant to spend more time with her and Dr. Prideaux, but after that party at Cobalt's I've hardly seen either of them."

And not just because everyone had avoided one another after those events, either, because he'd seen enough of all the other participants. Of course, the other participants were by and large not employees of Hammel, and other than Sean he really had little to do with Hammel'ss faculty.

"I really ought to rectify this situation."

He was taken by surprise when Sean reached for his hand, and began to jerk it back before his conscious thoughts and his desire to reconcile got the better of him, and he forced himself to relax. "That's...perhaps true." He kept his voice carefully neutral, not wanting to get into an argument over whether or not he'd been an idiot in college. Particularly not since, as the telepath had pointed out, this was a celebratory dinner.

Which meant it was time to change the subject.

"This appetizer is delicious. I haven't had oysters in a while. I think the last time was the last time we went sailing, actually." He commented, twining his fingers with Sean's. "We need to do that again sometime."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“Life became hectic.” That was an understatement, of course. Josh had been assaulted not long after the party at Cobalt’s house, resulting in his incapacitation from social events. Hammel had been on Red Alert as well, and then with the extracurricular activities in which both Clarisse and Anya had joined Sean...it made perfect sense that Josh hadn’t seen much of either woman since then.

But he agreed that Josh should see more of them, and thus he suggested with a smile, “We can have them over for supper. We could make it a potluck, and you could be in charge of fruit salad.”

The telepath didn’t loosen his grip when Josh began to jerk back; nor was he hurt, because he knew that this had been unexpected. Instead he waited, and low and behold, Josh relaxed and let him hold his hand, which he did lightly, rubbing his thumb along the other man’s.

Because he, too, wanted to avoid an argument, he went along with the subject change. Pressing his fingers into the other man’s, he nodded in agreement and smiled. “That could be easily arranged; the weather is still nice and the water would be warm. We could make a day of it whenever you wanted. Since we can leave together easily now.” Or they would be able to once Josh moved in.

[Joshua Bernstein]

"I think I can handle a fruit salad." Josh agreed. He'd even had some practice slicing fruit with Riley, first when he and Cobalt had helped the landscaper with his apple pies when he'd stood them up for lunch, and then again when he' begged Riley to help him bake an apology cake for Sean. And slicing fruit wasn't easy, and he was always kind of afraid that he was going to slice off his finger or maybe cut the fruit in the wrong shape so that it wouldn't bake properly, but somehow he'd managed not to screw up either the apple pies nor the strawberry shortcakes.

Besides, slicing fruit didn't involve the oven or the food processor or anything else that might result in burning things or short circuiting kitchen appliances.

"That would be nice." He smiled at the thought; they hadn't been sailing once since he'd moved up to Pilot Ridge, which was unfortunate. There truly hadn't been much time for relaxation and enjoyment, had there? "It can't coincide with vacation." He warned. A day out on the lake with Sean would be lovely, but it did not constitute a vacation. "I'll have to check the weather, but maybe in a week or two? How does that sound? We need to get on this before we get hit with snow."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“I have the utmost confidence in your abilities,” the telepath informed him, which was to say that he believed that Josh was capable of using a melon-baller. And cutting strawberries and peaches, and washing grapes and blueberries.

Because they would host this party, Sean would take care of the main course; he would enjoy doing that, and he was sure that he could find something that would satisfy everyone. If the weather was still nice by the time of this supper, then they might even have a barbecue. There had been a woefully insufficient number of barbecues since Josh had come to Vermont. Anya could be in charge of desserts, of course, and Clarisse could make a side dish. Sean would be in charge of liquor because there was more than enough in the house to share.

Although they would be on better behavior.

“Very well.” It wasn’t worth arguing that they could start the vacation off with sailing and then go from there. It would be simple enough to take a weekend and spend an entire day out on the boat. Then Sean smiled. “That sounds lovely. We can play catch and release if you want. And pick up a six pack.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

"So when do I need to have this fruit salad by?" As if Sean had picked a date mentally already. They still had to inform Clarisse and Anya of this plan, after all, and thus they would need to choose a date that worked for all four of them.

or more, of course; he wasn't adverse to adding to the guest list, but a small, cozy gathering was perfectly fine, particularly as he wasn't sure whether or not either Clarisse or Anya were seeing anyone. He'd thought Clarisse was dating the British gentleman from the last two parties he'd seen her at, but he'd been too drugged up at Christmas and too distracted by Sean at New Year's to really pay much attention.

He nodded as he ate, thrilled at the prospect of sailing, particularly now that they had a time line in mind. "I'll never turn down a six pack, just don't let me fall overboard and drown." He teased. While he could stomach more alcohol than he'd been capable of in college his limits were still nowhere near Sean's.

"And catch and release is always fun. Maybe I'll identify more than a quarter of our catches correctly this time."

He wasn't very good at fish. They all sort of looked like slimy sea things with scales to him.

They were, however, quite tasty, the proof of which was heading their way in the hands of their waiter.

He disentangled his hand from Sean's to make space for their main entrees, giving the waiter a thanks as he salivated in anticipation. This was truly a wondrous feast.