Pass Me The Oreo - Cobalt

[Benjamin Rhodes]

As the days went by, Ben's realisation that he was being a jerk grew. And with that also came the realisation that trying to avoid Cobalt was painful. Literally.

He was so fixated on not thinking about Cobalt that he sort of forgot that he had furniture. He kept stubbing his toes on the couch, tripped over a carpet, missed a step on the stairs, hit his head on the door and almost decapitated his head in the toilet sink. It was weird; he just felt so imbalanced.

After much debate, he finally got up the courage to grab a few things from home and drove over to Cobalt. At the last minute, he remembered that he'd bought a chew toy for Jules so he grabbed that as well. If Cobalt's offerings didn't help, he could at least sway Jules' opinion of him. Hopefully.

It was only when he was halfway through his parking that he realised that he hadn't notified the older man that he was coming. Because for one, Cobalt might not be at home. Or even worst, he was at home with a guest. Ben had been presumptuous to think Cobalt was always available. But he was already there so really, it would be a waste of petrol if he didn't at least go up to Cobalt's apartment and knock.

So he went up to Cobalt's apartment and knocked. He smiled when he heard the tiny scratching at the door almost immediately, before the door swung open. Ben held the bag of things he brought in front of him, shaking it a little. "I've got Clint Eastwood, milk and a box of cookies. I come in peace." He lowered the bag and grinned sheepishly at Cobalt.

It was silly but Ben did feel a sense of relief when he saw the older man standing in front of him.

[Cobalt Weaver]

Cobalt was doing fine, actually. It wasn’t so much that he thought about it and accepted that something had happened and moved on, however. It was more that Cobalt resolved not to think about it because it made him want to punch things. The stupid party Josh made him go to just made him feel worse. Ben had barely talked to him, so as a result, Cobalt hadn’t sought out his company. And it was so stupid.

And, in reality, Cobalt usually was available. He didn’t have guests usually, and he really only rarely made plans. So when Ben was outside in his car, realizing he hadn’t called, Cobalt was sprawled out on his couch, reading a book. He started when he heard the knock on the door and Jules, who was sitting on the armchair, perked up and sped to the door.

Cobalt frowned. “All right, I’m coming.” He pushed himself off the couch with a grunt and pulled open the door, blinking.

…Ben.

There was a moment as Cobalt stared at Ben, his mouth slightly opened as his brain tried to piece together the fact that Ben was standing, unannounced, at his door, carrying food. “…Uhm.” He supplied intelligently, “…What?”

Realizing that this probably wasn’t the response Ben was looking for, Cobalt scrambled to explain, “I-I mean… you haven’t spoken to me in weeks. You could barely look me in the face at that stupid thing Josh made me go to. I don’t…” He just didn’t understand what was actually going on. He wanted to be aware of what was going on in Ben’s mind.

[Benjamin Rhodes]

The response obviously was not what Ben hoped for but it was a response he deserved and Ben took it as he should. He dropped the bag down to the floor, nodding at Cobalt's words, agreeing with everything he was saying. A part of him wanted to just tell Cobalt everything.

But no. Too heavy. He wanted to just sit down on the couch, ignore the DVD he put in and just wrap his arms around Cobalt. And stay like that for the rest of the day. Maybe evening.

"I'm...I'm sorry Cobalt." Ben shook his head before pulling Cobalt into a hug. He didn't care that Cobalt might be hating him or that he would probably kick Ben in the balls for being confusing and fickle-minded. Being all hot and cold in a matter of days...stupid Ben.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have...I meant to talk to you. I would have but...you were with your friends and I didn't..." Ben sighed, not sure why he was trying to turn the tables over on Cobalt so he just kept quiet and hugged Cobalt a little more. He pulled away just to enter the apartment, sliding the bag in with his foot before turning to Cobalt again to place a warm, long kiss on Cobalt's temple. "Please, please forgive me."

[Cobalt Weaver]

Cobalt…actually (for once) wasn’t so much angry as he was confused. But that was mostly because he didn’t much blame Ben in the first place. He had been frustrated, yes, and if he thought about this situation, he probably would have gotten frustrated again. But he was mostly frustrated because he assumed that the issues they were having was on his account, not Ben’s. He just wanted to get a handle on the situation.

Which made Ben’s subsequent, fervent apology extremely baffling. Cobalt almost fell over when Ben pulled him over and hugged him tight, stammering out a half-coherent apology. Cobalt froze, resting his head on Ben’s shoulder. “Wh—no, Ben, it’s…” He squirmed a little in Ben’s grasp. Finally, the other man let him go, and apologized some more; Cobalt didn’t know what to do—he’d never had someone be so apologetic at him before.

“It’s fine,” Cobalt assured him, suddenly feeling so much better, if still a little bewildered, “Ben, I swear it’s fine.” He didn’t know what else to do, so he pulled the other man down to kiss him firmly on the lips. When he reluctantly pulled away, he didn’t go very far, resting his forehead against Ben’s, “I guess I missed you or something.” Deciding that sounded fairly stupid, he shrugged, “At least, I’m glad I didn’t do anything this time.” Cobalt wondered why he had such a problem with words right now.

[Benjamin Rhodes]

Cobalt's reassurance that it was fine was basically not heeded. Mostly because Ben was kind of having too much fun hugging the guy. He couldn't quite put into words why he always felt right wrapping himself around the smaller man but he did. He really did.

The kiss was definitely not accounted for but damn it all if it wasn't the best surprise. Cobalt was giving him a second chance, hell Cobalt had probably given him way too many chances already. If he screwed up one more time, he will send himself straight to hell with bells attached to announce his arrival to whatever entity guarded the fiery pits.

...Yeah, dramatic.

A smile spread across Ben's lips when Cobalt said he missed him. "Might have missed you too." He couldn't believe how true that statement was. "No," Ben laughed quietly. "You didn't do anything at all. My bad." He pulled Cobalt for another kiss, this time a little longer than before. Ben only pulled away when his jeans were pawed at by the little kitten.

"Oh hey, pretty kitty. No, I haven't forgotten about you." Ben bent down and pulled out the white felt mouse chew toy he had gotten for Jules, putting it on the ground and letting her play with it. Standing up, he smiled at Cobalt and gestured at the bag. "The cookies aren't gonna get eaten by themselves. Shall we?" Ben asked, slinging an arm around his boyfriend and maneuvering him over to the couch.

[Cobalt Weaver]

Cobalt felt a crooked grin stretch across his face, “Okay.” He didn’t quite believe that he wasn’t at least in part to blame, but he was willing to accept it for now. Especially now that it looked to be that things were going back to normal, which was all Cobalt wanted anyways.

Cobalt smiled when Ben presented Jules with a cat toy, “That was nice of you. Maybe now she’ll stop trying to eat my shoes.” He laughed, leaning against Ben, pushing his forehead against Ben’s shoulder, allowing the other man to sling an arm around his shoulders. He poked his head up and peered at the bag interestedly, “Cookies, huh? I wanna see.” He made an ineffectual grab at the bag before dropping agreeably on the couch.

“So…you didn’t have to…I mean,” Cobalt rubbed the back of his neck, “Thanks for coming. Really. But you know you didn’t have to. Just because you felt bad or something.” He nudged Ben, smiling slightly, “Really, it’s fine.” There wasn’t any attempt to guilt Ben here, Cobalt just genuinely believed that Ben had done this simply as an apology. An obligation. It made sense to him, and he didn’t see any other reason why Ben would be doing this.

[Benjamin Rhodes]

The grin was all Ben could hope for. Even if this visit doesn't go the way he planned, at least he managed to make Cobalt smile. He was good with that.

"Oh the toy doesn't guarantee her not eating your shoes. I just brought it as a distraction for today." He shrugged solemnly before a wide grin broke out on his face. "Just kidding."

Was it wrong that Ben felt that Cobalt just fit perfectly in his arm? Because Cobalt did fit in his arm perfectly. Snugly. Like he was meant for it or something.

Ben pulled the bag up so Cobalt could see before slipping the DVD out. "Lemme put this on first." He hesitantly pulled away from Cobalt and set the bag on the coffee table before fiddling with the DVD player, switching on the TV as he did so. Once the DVD was popped in, Ben pressed play and walked to the kitchen to get two plastic tumblers for the milk.

Settling onto the couch, Ben ripped open the box of cookies and took one packet out. When Cobalt spoke, Ben turned to the man with a little smile. "I wanted to, Coby." Ben leaned in and pressed a kiss firmly on the other man's lips. "I meant it when I said I missed you." He stroked the other man's cheek and smiled wider.

He poured out the milk and leaned back into the couch, handing one tumbler to Cobalt while holding on to his own. "You ever watched any of Clint Eastwood's films?"

[Cobalt Weaver]

“Alas,” Cobalt said dramatically, “I shall continue to hide my shoes then. Seriously, it’s a good thing I haven’t forgotten to close my closet door, or my dress shoes would be ruined.”

Yes, Cobalt had dress shoes. He could look nice sometimes, okay?

Cobalt leaned against Ben’s shoulder comfortably before pulling away to rummage through the bag, “Oreos! Excellent choice.” He sat with one leg bent and pulled up to his chest—his answer to sitting crosslegged, which he couldn’t do anymore—and let Ben set up the DVD player.

“You’re lucky I had this out,” Cobalt commented absently, watching Ben get everything together, “I never watch movies. Or T.V.”

When Ben leaned down to kiss him, Cobalt arched up to return the favor readily. “I’m glad,” He smiled awkwardly, “I mean. Yeah.” He decided talking was actually a stupid idea at the moment and tucked himself back under Ben’s arm.

“I haven’t, no.” Cobalt shook his head, “I told you, I don’t watch movies. Last one I’d seen was that stupid movie Leila made us watch. Besides that, I hadn’t seen a movie in years.”

[Benjamin Rhodes]

Ben would have been more surprised that Cobalt didn't own a pair of dress shoes. Every man should have at least one. Hell, Ben would have bought Cobalt a new pair of the man didn't have any. He wondered how the man would look in those...

...Not the time for that.

"I know!" Glad that Cobalt was agreeable with his choice of snack, Ben grinned widely. If the man didn't like Oreos, Ben would seriously need to educate him in the goodness that is the Kraft snack.

"Well then," Ben grinned at Cobalt's comment about not utilising the TV. "You're like, busy with work and stuff. I'm lazy and I need instant gratification. Like a teenager." He shrugged.

To Ben, it looked like the kiss had rendered Cobalt speechless and that sort of made him feel smug. It also just made him want to kiss Cobalt even more. So he did. And then pulled Cobalt closer as the movie started. He loved this cuddly Cobalt. He wanted this cuddly Cobalt forever.

"Right...well, this movie is pretty awesome. Clint Eastwood, you must know, is an amazing actor. He also directed a bunch of movies which are pretty damn awesome. Well...you can see for yourself." Ben absentmindedly dunked an Oreo into Cobalt's milk and took a bite out of it. "Best snack ever." He mumbled as he chewed on the cookie.

[Cobalt Weaver]

Cobalt grinned at him from where he was nestled under Ben’s arm. He took the glass of milk gratefully and straightened up enough to pick open the Oreo wrapping. Snatching a cookie out of the bag, Cobalt tucked his leg under his chin and bit into the cookie. Tasty, tasty cookie.

He snorted, “That’s not even true. I’m just an old, grouchy fellow who isn’t used to television because I was too poor to own a T.V. when I was younger, and now I don’t watch it at all.” He grinned, eating the rest of the cookie.

Cobalt would have bristled at being called cuddly, but he really was feeling so inclined. He really had missed Ben. He was just glad that everything was back to normal, and Cobalt was starting to believe that he could be happy without fearing that it will be all pulled out from under him. Almost. So he shifted so that he was nestled in the crook of Ben’s arm, smiling quietly.

Cobalt’s smile widened as Ben reached over and used his own milk for his cookie. In answer, Cobalt reached over and dipped his cookie in Ben’s glass of milk, “Indeed.”

He settled back, “So what’s this movie called, anyways?”

[Benjamin Rhodes]

"I'm so not about to list down the merits of having a TV in the house. It's supposed to be a very, very bad for your eyesight and your body...or something." Ben chuckled as he rest his head on top of Cobalt's. Damn, this all felt so good.

When Cobalt shifted, Ben smiled and accommodated the move. He hadn't felt this comfortable with someone since...well, that wasn't a happy memory but whatever. This right here, this he liked. And if Cobalt was comfortable with this, then damn it, so was Ben.

Cobalt dunking his cookie in Ben's milk made the psychologist grin even wider, if that was even possible. "Movie's called Dirty Harry. Without revealing too much, he's a cop and he handles homicides." Ben shrugged and dunked his cookie once more in Cobalt's milk and offered it to Cobalt. "Want some?" He teased.

[Cobalt Weaver]

Cobalt laughed, “As if I don’t have enough problems with my eyesight and my knees.” He didn’t say body because he was in rather good shape for his age, if he did say so himself, but his knees did act up. But hey, that was why he jogged.

“Oh.” Cobalt sat up, looking much more interested, “Awesome. I’ve heard about this movie. Guess it’s kind of famous or something? I dunno, but it sounds good.” Cobalt liked crime stories. Hence why his bookshelf was full of shitty murder mysteries.

Cobalt gave Ben an amused look when a cookie was shoved in his face. “Ew, no,” He made a face and shoved the cookie back in Ben’s face, “Keep your cookie to yourself.” He laughed, giving Ben a light smack on the back of the head, “Dork.”

Cobalt absently bit into his own cookie, watching the screen change from the commercials to the opening, “So…” He chewed his cookie absently, “What have you been up to, anyways?”

[Benjamin Rhodes]

Ben simply laughed at Cobalt's statement. He caught the fact that Cobalt didn't mention anything about his body and well frankly, Ben could definitely see why.

...Still not the time.

"Oh it's very famous. It's basically the pioneer of it's genre." Ben enthused.

Ben chuckled through his mouth full of cookie, chewing it with a goofy grin on his face. "But it's supposed to taste better coming from someone else's hands, man!" He guffawed before biting into another cookie sans milk.

The question brought Ben to the present and he shrugged. "Nothing much. Just work. Went out with Yulia the other night. She was a hoot," Ben exaggerated. The girl still refused to speak like a regular young woman so Ben basically brought the conversation along. But at least she laughed at a few of his lame jokes.

"How was Danny the other night? I hope it was fun for both of you." Ben said, still a little high on being forgiven. His voice held no malice and there was even a curious smile on his face. "What all did you two do?" Ben placed his tumbler in between his leg so he could use one arm to pull Cobalt close while the other was used to dunk his cookies into his milk.

[Cobalt Weaver]

“Really? Wow.” Cobalt was now really interested to watch this movie, “I really like crime stories. They remind me that my early years could have been weirder. Although Sam and I did blow up a car once.” He stopped. Ooops. Hadn’t really meant to say that. “…In the name of justice?” He offered, with a sheepish grin. Being twenty-eight had been weird.

“I doubt it,” Cobalt scoffed, grinning, “I will eat my own cookies, thank you.”

Cobalt raised an eyebrow, “She was, huh?” The disbelief on his voice was plain; he liked Yulia a lot—the younger woman was as serious as he was, and usually tempered out Leila’s insanity—but he was positive that she was not really “a hoot”. “Well, that’s good,” He settled on saying, “Hope she’s doing well too.”

Cobalt’s face split into a wide grin as the other man mentioned Danny. “Oh, it was fine. We ate, and Danny mothered me about not eating, and…we talked,” Cobalt shrugged, “It’s…we haven’t seen each other in years. I guess I’m starting to accept that he’s actually back? So it got a little embarrassing and emotional or something.” Cobalt made a face, leaning over to all but snuggle against Ben’s chest. Not that he was actually snuggling! But he was getting close. Ben was warm, and happy, and making some sense.

“Everything is…working out.” Cobalt said quietly, “Which is rare. If I seem…distant sometimes, it’s because I’m waiting for it to all get pulled out from under my feet.” Maybe that was why Ben detached. Maybe Cobalt was getting distant without knowing it. Either way, Ben should know this.

[Benjamin Rhodes]

Ben sputtered at the idea that Cobalt had blown up a freaking car. "Wait, you're...serious?" his justification made it seem even more ridiculous but really, why would Cobalt embellish something like this? "Ok...ay." Ben chuckled a little, shaking his head in amusement.

"Tsk. So uptight." Ben teased. "Guess you wouldn't be open to feeding me some then." He sighed dramatically. "I guess I can live with having to feed myself..."

He laughed at Cobalt's disbelief. "Oh yeah she was." He chuckled before mouthing a "No she wasn't," while shaking his head. "But yeah, she's doing fine. I think she's finally making some friends so that's a good sign." Ben nodded.

If Ben was jealous of how instantly Cobalt lit up at the mention of Danny, he sure wasn't showing it then. It was probably the sugar high from the cookies mixed with his euphoria of being so comfortable with Cobalt in his arms that more or less dulled his somewhat misplaced jealousy. If he were aware of it, Ben would just have to remind himself that Cobalt was with him instead of Danny.

Cobalt's confession sort of brought him down from the cloud he'd been wandering on and Ben decided honesty was the best policy. If the older man, who had started this by openly stating he had baggage, was willing to be honest, Ben should too. It was only fair.

"I'm...I guess I...I feel the same way?" Ben replied, the movie sort of just background music now. "I didn't think this was gonna be...I mean I wasn't sure if...well, I was scared that the baggage you claimed to have was going to bite me in the ass and roll over me." He moved both his and Cobalt's tumblers on to the table. Pulling Cobalt practically on his lap, Ben made Cobalt turn his face towards him.

"I don't want you to think that every thing about you scares me. It's just...there's a few things in my past that I can't share with you just yet because I don't wanna scare you off." He paused, realising that this was already more than he intended to say. "I like you Cobalt. Kind of...a lot. And I was distancing myself mostly because of bad experiences. And I'm sorry you had to take the brunt of it." There. Honesty. Surprisingly, it did feel good to let it all out.

Ben leaned in and moved to kiss Cobalt but waited until he gave permission. He would back off if Cobalt didn't allow it.