What Is This? (Lani.)

[Odion Martins]

There was blood, blood just everywhere. But he had to fire the gun, there was no other way. He had to be strong, he had to be strong even though it didn’t matter anymore. Did it matter anymore? Everything red, covered, but that didn’t matter either. He couldn’t get away from it, even though he wanted to. And that smell, what was that? Like open air, like grass. Grass in the middle of a warehouse? But how?...

What was he doing here? Odion ran a hand over his crusted eyes, moonlight bathing him. His head snapped around as he took in the surroundings. There was Hammel, just off to the right. So why on earth was he just sitting in a training field? He closed his eyes again, begging his power to work, if only for a few moments so he could see what happened. But it was obvious he was too tired to go back, but his stubbornness begged him to try anyways. No, it just wasn’t working.

Shorts and a t-shirt, this was as casual as it got for the ginger. He stood up, wondering what day it was and what had happened. Honestly, the last thing he could remember was sitting in the library, playing with his old deck of cards, and now, here he was, middle of the night and dressed differently. He knew, because he had been wearing jeans before.

Time turning – a blessing and a curse. There was something truly epic about being able to control the force that controlled everyone else, and yet, it did the most damage to its master. Taking a step towards the school, Odion heard a crunching noise under his foot. He stooped down to inspect the object. It looked sort of like a tube, but now he wasn’t sure, since it was shattered and definitely broken. What the hell had he been doing out here? His power was just getting worse, giving him more trouble. What he should’ve been feeling at an earlier age was only happening now, because his manifestation had happened later in his life.

Now he was out in the open when he should’ve been asleep. And he was powerless. This wasn’t going to end well. Someone was going to catch him out here.

[Lani Hunter]

Lani's legs hung over the edge of the roof as he kicked them and stared up at the stars. The wind was cool agaisnt his skin and the scent of rain on the wind danced at his nostrils. He sighed and almost wished it was winter so he could see the condensation of his breath on the air. He watched the stars his eyes not even fully focusing on them, rather he was doing inventory on his wounds, both internal and external of the past weeks. The bruises were all but gone, a few stubborn ones were sore but what was worrying him was the one on his side, it was still nasty, but it too looked a lot better than it had before. The cut on his cheek had faded into a dim scar the last time he had looked in a mirror. It felt large on his face but in reality was less than a pinky long and as thin as a thread. The internal had become easy to hide at least and Lani was more or less at least able to feint happiness. No one really noticed it didn't reach his eyes.

Odion had been driving him up the wall of late. He supposed he couldn't complain, considering Odion was speaking to him at all. But it was infuriating, they would be together for one minute chatting or doing something random and it would almost be like old times, then something would happen, Lani would say something or a thought would cross Odion's mind and the redhead shut down and made a rather quick exit. But it had been their most recent encountered that had pushed Lani to the edge. Admittedly, Lani had started it. When Odion shut down again he had called the redhead out on it. Worse off was that their first fight was in his memories tonight and he couldn't get out of his head what Odion had admitted to. But Odion had avoided him the past few days. He would catch Lani's eyes then turn the other way. It was driving Lani mad!

Lani glanced down at the ground as the moonlight was cut by the flight of a bat. Today had been one of the bad days and he had slept most of the day in a state of half awareness and half dream. He wasn't sure what to do about Odion at the moment, part of him needed to know if Odion wanted anything to do with him anymore, but the other part of him was terrified by what the answer might be. But Lani was sick of this dodging around things, it wasn't working and it was only making him more frustrated. If Odion wanted nothing more to do with him Lani needed to hear him say it. At least if that were the case he could heal, but this, what they were doing was only keeping Lani off balance. But Lani ran a hand over his face, he did not want Odion to say it though because somewhere deep down he felt the same way. He shook his head, he needed to focus.

He slipped off the roof and it was a quick way down on the loose bricks. He was dressed in black like he had been when Odion had first caught him with a hat and high collar pulled down. That was when a figure caught his eye. He started off but his curiosity was too great. He slipped through the shadows and... "Odion?" Lani asked bewildered. His surprise was quickly covered be a stubborn glare. Maybe this was it. His heist could wait but right now his eyes were sharp and he felt his power reaching out for the redhead. Lani separated from the shadows and approached Odion slowly. "I need to talk to you," he said his voice giving nothing away, "And I swear that I will stick you to the ground if you try to run off." He crossed his arms daring the redhead to challenge him.

[Odion Martins]

Odion had been lying about more than just his powers. He had been lying about that day in Boston. He hadn’t been outright lying, but he had kept everything to himself. He was more paranoid since he got back. Rhett still felt like he was lurking in the shadows, and Odion wondered if he could ever escape the man. His fingers found their way to his temples and he pressed. Strange images had been mixing with reality, his nightmares and his dreams meshing into one thing. It was no wonder his power went into protective mode and sent him on a loop. Maybe it just wanted to forget what happened in Boston, what he had done for Lani. The ginger boy wasn’t as strong as he pretended to be. And he had been doing some worrying himself. He didn’t know what he should or shouldn’t do around or with Lani, and it was such a mess. Was he okay after all that happened? That scar on his face would never heal.

But Odion had learned his lesson. At least, he knew which ways he could push Lani and which ways the blonde turned into an elephant. He had returned to the memory of what he and Lani had become before the ginger left for France. Lani hadn’t reacted to the most important part of Odi’s lashing, and since he was obsessed with Adrianna... Odion was just having a hard time accepting it, especially when Lani had made his confusion pretty clear to Odion. Maybe Lani didn’t think Odion would’ve picked up on it, but Odi really thought something was there. He already had a hard time when what he believed was right, went wrong. Just like when he followed Rhett. Lani was a better man, definitely, but Odion had fallen too quickly, and now he needed to make sure he didn’t fall again. He just didn't know how much to give Lani anymore. And maybe Lani just didn’t like him like that, and Odion hated that. He had stopped digging to see anything else that could be, because he was afraid to find out that Lani really just didn’t like him at all.

A familiar voice snuck up on him, and Odion fidgeted on the spot. His nerves wanted him to run, but his heart didn’t want to anymore. Though adjusted to the light, Odi had to wonder where Lani’s voice was coming from. He could feel Lani’s power wrap around him like a scarf, and soon he came into view. As usual, the blonde was wearing his favorite color of shadow. Odion had an annoyed smile on his face. He felt as haunted by Lani as Lani did by him. “Okay,” Odion said, sitting back on the ground. He could deal with this set of grey eyes. If Lani wanted to talk, then he could at least gather up his energy while it happened. Odi could sense Lani wouldn’t let him go, even though his words had only solidified the time turner’s beliefs. He wanted to say some smart quip about how Lani could just ask him to go on a heist, but Odi didn’t have the nerve right now. He was still pretty shaken from appearing here randomly.

[Lani Hunter]

That day had been so confusing. Everything was shattering around him and he had become positively panicked when he couldn’t find Odion after they got back. He had been half prepared to go back to Boston to destroy everything when Rhett had texted him. That had been terrifying, Lani thought it was someone from a rival group or even someone from the group itself. What better way to get back at Lani than to get him with the law? Then the despair had hit. And when he had found Odion the relief had been washed away by the reality that he was leaving. Lani had tried so hard not to dwell on those words but they were haunting him. He had no idea how much Odion had picked up on his confusion but when that had happened he had been more than half mad, and when the day after Adrianna had extended her hand it had been all too easy to believe one over the other.

Okay? That was all he got? Lani had to admit that his thunder was a little bit stolen at that moment. He had been expecting a fight, some snide comment and an all out battle to start from just that, but… okay? Lani’s eyes narrowed and he tried his best to ignore the way his heart was trembling, but he could not lose his nerve, not now. Wasn’t it just yesterday that he had tried to find Odion only to find he was losing a game of hide and seek? Odion was just as good as Lani was when he didn’t want to be found. The few times he had seen Odion it had almost seemed like he was walking in a daze but unusually focused on avoiding him. Lani always lost him after a few turns. It was frustrating. “Okay,” Lani echoed as Odion sat. Lani didn’t sit; he was still standing a ways off his feet planted and his face showing courage he didn’t feel.

“I need to hear your say it,” Lani said without preamble. Odion would know exactly what he was talking about. Perhaps that was why Odion had been avoiding him, he didn’t want to have to answer Lani’s question. He didn’t take his eyes off of Odion, it was a relief that it was so dark because then the blue eyes couldn’t pierce his eyes so deeply. But the built up frustration was pouring out. “You keep saying I’m clueless so why don’t you just tell me what you think for once?” His voice came out harsher than he intended but after being avoided for a couple days he was done with being diplomatic about it. “Odion, you’re the best friend I’ve ever had, but I cannot keep doing this.” Now he gestured with something of desperation, couldn’t Odion see that Lani was being torn to pieces? Couldn’t he see what his avoidance was doing? But really he would only be worse off if Odion’s answer was the one he feared.

[Odion Martins]

The only good thing that came from that day in Boston, was Odion had found what he truly felt over Rhett. After spending time with him in France, he knew it was really over. He knew they wouldn’t last. Rhett had been sweet about it, but Odi was still just an object. And even in France, with nothing to remind him of Lani, Odion still thought of his friend. It just didn’t seem right, that Lani had come into his life at all. Weren’t good things supposed to be outright good? But no, Lani had to be complicated as well. What did Odi expect, really? But Odi came back because he wanted to, not because anyone was making him, or because anyone was trying to own or possess him. He came back for himself. It was only once he returned that being a part of Lani’s life seemed inevitable. He had also left for selfish reasons. He was mad at Lani and didn’t want to forgive him, but that didn’t mean Odi wasn’t capable of forgiveness, it was just hard to come by. Still, Lani had broken through walls even Rhett hadn’t managed to get past, and Odi couldn’t forget that. It was like he thought before – Lani was worth it.

For once, Odi wasn’t trying to steal Lani’s thunder. Really, he was just exhausted. But Lani wasn’t a mind reader, and when you expected a porcupine to flare its quills, a rather docile version wasn’t what someone expected. But Odion still had a few tricks up his sleeves. Avoiding Lani while stuck in his own mind wasn’t one of them. And no one had tried to shake Odi out of his stupor. And why would they? All he’s done is avoid people or irritate them since he’s been here. Who would stop him to ask him if he was alright? He was on good terms with two other people other than Lani, and considering the size of the school, that was pretty pathetic. But it was what he wanted, and now it was coming back to tear him apart. Not even the teachers knew he was in a zombie state, they just thought he was being his usual prickly self.

“I don’t get you Lani,” Odion started, looking up at Lani against the backdrop of the sky, “you’ve said more to me now than before... before I left.” How did that old saying go? You don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone. Odi would’ve given anything to have any kind of meaningful conversation with Lani before the Boston Incident. So why now? Was Lani trying to salvage something, or was he trying to make himself feel good? “I’ve said everything I need to say,” he said, his voice rather soft and without a spike. Not at all how he wanted to sound. And then the kicker. Lani saying his name again, the mentioning of being his best friend. Maybe Adrianna had flat out told Lani she loved him, but so had Odion, in his own way. He just was refusing to come to terms with that. They both were. It was just different now that he knew what Lani was truly capable of. But he wasn't lying when he had told Lani he was falling for him. He was falling, and then Lani's reality caught him before Lani actually could.

“Can’t keep doing what? Lying to yourself?” Odion challenged, too tired to quicken time, but not too tired to push his friend. He sighed and clenched his jaw. It was now or never. “You’re my best friend too, but...” He couldn’t keep doing this either. Groaning, Odi touched his temples again, and then his jaw below his ears. “You remember the last time I told you what I thought?” His voice was strained from exhaustion and stress. There had been a few times actually. “Well I don’t think you actually want to hear what I have to say, so why bother when you won’t do anything with it?” He was turning questions on Lani now, but if Lani wanted him to be honest, they were going to have to have that two way street again. And there was no going back. Could he deal with that? Odion struggled to see Lani through the dim light, but it was useless. He didn’t have his second best tool after his power, and once again he found himself defenceless with Lani.

[Lani Hunter]

Lani didn’t know what to do anymore. Boston was still his home but he hadn’t been back since he had gone to his family to make sure that they were alright, and to collapse into their arms. He had never thought there would be a moment when he would need his family so much. But they were there. Not to offer a way to make him feel better about what had happened but to give comfort. Let him know he was not alone. He hadn’t ventured outside much that trip but no one had come looking for trouble either. Lani knew Odion wouldn’t forgive him easily but this was beyond his ability to bear. His heart was in shambles and every time hope grew and he was able to stand on his own two feet something happened and he was knocked off again. He closed his eyes, he didn’t want to go back, back when his heart had been lost in the caverns of his mind. He had to go on but if he could never get on stable ground how could he do that?

Irritating, that he would give Odion but really he knew that if Odion didn’t care he wouldn’t waste the effort to talk to him. What made Odion irritating was that he saw so much and dug so deep that at least for Lani the natural reaction had been to cover up and lie. At least at first, but then Odion came to close and Lani was afraid of losing Odion. Afraid that when he admitted what he was doing that Odion would deem him not worth the effort anymore. So when Odion started to avoid him Lani felt a foreboding pressure that something was going to happen, or was already happening and that Odion no longer deemed him worth that effort. They had tried and it had not worked out well, and Lani couldn’t blame him, it had been awkward and forced but it was something.

Lani cocked his head at Odion as he started speaking. Was it that hard to figure out? Lani shrugged and his feet shifted in the grass. “I thought you wanted me to be more open,” Lani said confused, “Besides, I’ve nothing left to hide.” He opened his arms and a sigh escaped his lips. What defined him, what he was covering up was exposed and over. He was lost and if Odion had thought Lani was off the map before now Lani might as well not even have a map. Odion soft voice was putting Lani on the edge. He wasn’t sure why but that sounded too much like giving up. Lani swallowed and nodded his head. “I see.” So that was it? There was nothing left to say. Lani’s nerve ebbed then flowed forward again. “So that’s why you’ve been avoiding me, huh? Said all you needed to say and done?” He attacked, in no way soothed by the calm that Odion was emitting.

Lani bared his teeth at the words. He didn’t like hearing it out loud but on the other hand it was what he needed to here right now that mattered now not what he wanted to hear. Lani swore under his breath. “Don’t you think I’m trying?” He snapped in frustration. But Lani’s next rant was stalled by Odion admission but he listened his heart falling as he comprehended what he was hearing. Lani’s brow creased in worry, Odion didn’t sound good, but he forced himself not to back down. He was determined. Yes, Lani remembered and he had regretted it at first but really Odion’s opinion meant more to him than anything else. Lani crossed his arms again and shook his head. “This isn’t about what I want,” Lani said. Odion was counting him out before anything was even said. It was then that it hit him how much Odion’s trust of him had been broken. He had known it before but this was… this was real. “I’m all ears,” said Lani leaning forward, “Please Odion, I feel like I’m drowning here.” He shook his head and coughed to dispelled the unpleasant memories associated with that word.

[Odion Martins]

Coming back had been the bravest thing Odion had ever done. If Lani wasn’t worth his time and effort, he wouldn’t be here indulging him right now. Why couldn’t Lani just see that? Why did Odi have to explain every last detail in order for Lani to get it? They simply had different ways of going about things, Lani mapping his way, and Odi trying to find routes that may or may not have existed. If Odion could explain his weird power trips as of late... Well, would Lani even be trying so hard right now? But since Odi had no idea that that was what Lani was referring to, Odion just believed Lani missed him. He didn’t see ill intent just yet.

“I did, well I do, at least I think I do,” Odion was not able to articulate his words the way he wanted to. Truth was, he didn’t really know what he wanted from Lani. Odion just couldn’t understand why Lani couldn’t do it before. How many more people would he have to shoot for Lani to trust him? “I think you do Lani, I really think, you do.” He gave his friend a hard look and pointed at his own heart, before looking away at the ground beside him. Maybe it was all in Odi’s head now, but that paranoia about Lani had returned. He had made himself comfortable in their friendship and that had landed him in so much trouble, it almost cost him three lives.

Odion’s look was pleasing and confused. “Please Lani, I haven’t been avoiding you.” At least, not intentionally. He didn’t understand Lani’s anger. He grappled with his broken memory. Nothing had made itself appear since he woke up in the middle of this field. But he couldn’t explain that to Lani without having the blonde feel sorry for him, and that was something he refused to have bestowed on him. He didn’t want Lani’s compassion. But he had said all he needed to say. Lani hadn’t come after him, hadn’t read between the lines that Odion thought were clear. Maybe he was being melodramatic about it all, but it made sense in his head and he wished Lani could just understand as well.

“What is it about then?!” Odion said, his voice breaking. “You said you needed to hear me say it, but then it’s not about you? Is my saying things for myself then?” There was that heart Odion had been missing. He could feel it building something up inside of him. “It’s always been about you Lani. I didn’t save her for me, I saved her for you. I didn’t help you train because it would help me. I just want to be with...” he stopped so suddenly, the silence was deafening. “I just want to help you, because you helped me,” he quickly amended, the force in his words dying like the light in his eyes. Odion just didn't want to admit all the good Lani was doing for him. If it was all about Lani, then why was Odi so interested?

He still wasn’t sure what Lani was getting at. If Lani wanted him to admit he was falling for him, then Lani could just forget it. He wasn’t putting his heart out on the line while Lani pretended everything was okay and offered nothing in return. Lani claimed he was drowning, but Odion didn’t believe him.

[Lani Hunter]

Lani frowned at Odion. He was glad he had gotten Odion when he did. And he would stick Odion to the ground all night if he had to. Well, at least if Odion’s power didn’t work against his again. But hell, he missed the way things had been when they could play their mind games without any fear for someone snapping under the pressure. Now the smallest word could have the biggest implication, and silence. Silence just screamed. But something was missing, and perhaps this was the something. The truth. Lani was avoiding it still. He had never believed that things could turn so fast and to such extremes. His heart beat was loud in his ears as he waited for an answer.

Lani raised a brow at Odion’s explanation. What did Odion what from him? Lani wasn’t even sure what he could offer now. He didn’t even know what he wanted from himself besides change. Lani shifted uncomfortably at Odion’s assumption. He gulped despite his sureness. Things might seem clean and all other secrets might pale in comparison to that one, but Odion was right, they were there. Lani chose not to answer that. At least he didn’t have any more secrets that would damage anyone else. He stared down at his feet unable to look at Odion as if his eyes could glow in the darkness. Hard and angry, just like the nightmares. But he couldn’t escape those eyes anymore than he could escape Odion’s.

“Bullshit,” Lani said automatically, “So you don’t call dodging me and practically running when you saw me avoiding me? Huh, we must have different definitions.” Lani’s voice was cold but the confusion in Odion’s eyes let slip Lani’s argument a bit. The mind games had gone beyond Lani’s understand, and love above all things was out of his understanding. The sting of the words between them had been too great, he didn’t want to go after Odion when Odion made it clear he was the last person he wanted to see. And yet here he was, still trying. But he supposed he should give Odion credit for something. At least he had tried, but he had sense to pull out when there was no hope. No, Lani was the only one stupid enough to trudge across the battle field with a hopeless cause, but to Lani it wasn’t hopeless, in fact it was all he had.

“It’s about everything!” Lani replied just as desperately, “It doesn’t matter who it’s about because this is about both of us!” Lani was cut off by the flood from Odion’s mouth. He closed his eyes and opened them when Odion was finished his eyes dark and watery and he was glad that shadows were on his side tonight. “I need to hear you say it because you need to say it. Odion, I never wanted to pull you into all of that. I lied because I thought it would keep you from leaving,” Lani said his voice strained by the admission, “But I’ve learned my lesson. Odion I’m trying, I’m trying but it doesn’t seem to mean a damn thing.” Lani closed his eyes, he never asked for Odion’s help. He shook his head at Odion. “God, Odion, I… ” he ran a hand across his eyes, this was so confusing. He took a deep breath. “I didn’t deserve what you gave me,” Lani said slowly, “Even now I’m being selfish… But let me help you too, Odion. Just tell me…” Lani hesitated, his heart catching his throat he took a deep breath. Odion was right; but it was about time he helped Odion out. “Tell me what I can do.” He cared deeply about what Odion would say next because Lani would take it to heart. If Odion said ‘leave’ then Lani would leave, because that could be all he could do to help.

[Odion Martins]

He didn’t have any more secrets that he thought wouldn’t damage anyone else. They were hurting Odion, and the worst part was that neither of them knew how to articulate the secrets because they were secrets even to themselves. They needed to think them through a little more, but neither wanted to admit anything without the other admitting it also. They needed safety, and for some reason, the best person to find that in was also a thief. It didn’t make any fucking sense to Odion, but at the same time it was damn near perfect. What were the chances of finding each other really? It hadn’t been planned, it wasn’t something Odion had stepped into the future to see until a few days ago. He just knew Lani was keeping things from him, and would continue to do so. He didn’t want to call him out on it, because Lani could claim the exact same thing.

Odion frowned deeply. “I’m not dodging you right now, and apparently if I wanted to you wouldn’t let me.” But so far, Odi hadn’t made to leave yet. Lani was talking about right now, was he not? Because as far as Odi could remember, he had been making quite the effort to make things right with Lani. Just how much time had lapsed between his time sitting in the library, and this very moment. Odion gulped as realization hit him. He had been gone for more than just a few moments. It was getting worse. Time, was starting to control him. When you knew what you wanted, nothing seemed hopeless. But Odion had retreated, afraid. He liked Lani a lot, had learned a lot from him, but those lessons had been hard, the pain too great to shoulder on his own. He had had enough time to sort through things about Rhett, but that had taken years, and a solid week away from reality to get things right. Just how present had he been in France that week? He closed his eyes. How long would it take to decide over Lani?

Opening his eyes once more, Odion held his knees for balance. Time to admit to one of his hardest mind games. “I knew I was coming back here from France,” he said. Lani was going to hate him after this. “But I needed to see what you would do if you thought I never would.” There, that’s what hurt the most. Maybe Lani really did care, but he didn’t care the way Odion wanted him to. It was selfish and disgusting, but this was Odion and that was the truth if he ever knew it before. Now it stared him in the face, selfish and real, and it wasn’t something he had to do. It didn’t even feel good to do it, he just did. “So we both lied, and it didn’t keep me from leaving.”

Odion could feel everything crumbling. “I came back to try again, not because you deserve it.” He wasn’t Jesus Christ. “I did it because I wanted to. Because, fuck, because I care about you okay?” He didn’t like caring about people, it always ended badly. People were cruel, selfish, vicious, and unbearable. But that was why he did what he did. Not because it was right, shooting someone certainly wasn’t, not because he had anything to gain, he was spending his time on another person. He did it because of Lani, and Lani didn’t want to know the implications of that.

“I don’t know Lani...” Odion said, sealing his mouth shut, on the verge of a breakdown. He didn’t want to cry right now. He didn’t want to sob, so he held in his breath. “I don’t want to tell you what I want you to do.” It wasn’t fair, and if Odi wanted to be fair to anyone this second year in America, it was Lani. They were so close, and yet, something was terribly wrong. Odion stood up again. He wanted to run, he wanted to leave again and try again another day. “I can’t do this right now,” he said, giving into the tears that swam down his face. His powers, Declyn, enemies, Rhett, falling for Lani. Odion didn’t want to talk about it because he didn’t know how. But Lani was a man of his word. He wasn’t going to let him leave, was he?

[Lani Hunter]

It was hard to go from keeping secrets from everyone to finding someone worthy of their secrets. The secrets themselves might not be that large in reality but they looked so big to their eyes because part of their strength as thieves were secrets. If they were to exchange secrets that might work but neither would want to be the first in case the other double crossed him. It was a convoluted mess. Lani did trust Odion, but it was how long that it had taken him to realize that that had really damaged their friendship. And now Lani wasn’t sure what he could trust Odion with, because Odion might leave, even now. After everything Lani didn’t blame. When it came to secrets neither was completely to blame, but it wasn’t just bad luck that had caused Lani’s to be exposed.

Lani nodded verifying that that was how it was and that was how it was going to stay. There were no other people around to overhear, it was the middle of the night in the shadows. “And that’s a change,” he added dryly. Maybe time was against Odion because this wasn’t something that could be sped up or slowed down. No if time was going to heal this wound it would do it at its own pace. Lani wouldn’t put pressure on Odion to make a decision, but he did need to know if there was hope. If Odion was stringing him along now only to abandon him again Lani would not only be broken but he would be furious. It was only the question of what would happen after that would really define them. It was sad but Lani needed to know if Odion was giving him a real chance. If there was hope or if there wasn’t. He needed to know.

Odion’s admission struck Lani like a blow. He felt like he had just been dunked in ice. Or perhaps it was just the cold sweat running down his neck but he felt like he was holding his breath. How could Odion do that to him? What? Did Odion want Lani to crawl through the mud? His eyes narrowed and he clenched his jaw letting out the breath he had been holding. What was he doing now? Fighting to keep someone around who let him believe that he was never coming back for an experiment. Lani’s power flared and it raced at Odion but Lani quelled it that was not going to solve anything. “And are you happy now?” Lani ask his voice harsh and hurt. He wasn’t pulling any punches after that. No, that was too much. He had never imagined that Odion would stoop so low. He gritted his teeth and shook his head. “No it didn’t,” Lani hissed, “But you know when I lied I did it to protect you, but… I can’t believe you Odion.”

Lani nodded, well that was clear. Lani didn’t deserve it but now he felt like the floor had been dropped from under him. He wanted to tell Odion to fuck off, to tell him how much of a bastard he was for doing that to him, but then he realized Odion could return with the same response and be just as accurate. And Lani did want to try again. Lani turned his head away as he chewed on his lip trying to quell his power and stuff it back in its cage. He looked sharply back at Odion. “And you think I don’t care about you?” He challenged. “Dammit Odion! You’re so busy looking for double meaning that you never take a moment to see what’s in front of you!” Lani exploded for a brief moment before getting himself back under control.

“You know, when you came back I was getting better. I told myself I was never going to see you again,” Lani attacked his frustration and anger at the whole situation causing the truth to flow out, but at least in a more steady controlled manner, “I thought that that was the last thing I ever said to you.” Lani’s power flared again and when he declared he couldn’t do this now Lani grabbed him. Not hard but his power took hold of Odion’s shirt and feet and held him rooted to the spot. “You will do this right now,” Lani said his eyes too clouded with a mix of rage and hurt to see that Odion was also on the verge and beyond of tears. “Because nothing is making sense right now!” He gestured in frustration wondering how the tides had turned. Something had woken up in him when Shapiro hit him quite literally with sense and since then he had decided that yeah he had made mistakes but he was trying to fix them. He was done letting other people define him, he wanted to make his own definition. He had a life to live and god, he wanted Odion in it but it was up to Odion if he wanted Lani in his. Was that it? Was this the feeling people often referred to when they loved someone?

[Odion Martins]

“A change from what?” Odion asked. “I haven’t been dodging you.” He needed to know now. How bad of a turn had his power taken?

“No, I’m not happy...” Odi said, gritting his teeth. “You see? I knew you didn’t really want to hear what I... What is, one of the most truthful things I’ve ever said to you.” The ginger gulped hard. “I’m sorry Lani, I’m so used to being left behind, I didn’t really think I made that much of a difference for you.” It was a sob story, it was messy, but it was the best thing he had right now. He wasn’t any good for Lani. He and Adrianna were total opposites. Adrianna was open and honest and Lani loved her for it. Odion tried to be open and honest, but that only hurt Lani, Odion could see it. Lani would hate him if he continued trying to be honest. This was working almost as well as it was for Lani. Maybe if Odion was just honest, it would drive Lani away. Is that what Lani wanted? Odion sank his fingertips into the ground in frustration.

Lani just loaded Odi’s gun. “Neither do you,” he spat, his eyebrows furrowed in self loathing. How many goddamn times had he said that to Lani? And now Lani felt he had a right to be mad about it? “You have no idea how many times I’ve paused time just to keep a moment for a second longer,” he said, his voice curdled with high emotion. He’d paused just to have another glimpse at Lani’s beautiful smile. Lani had pictures, Odion had something no one could take away from him. But Lani was also right. To Odion, everything did have a double meaning, he couldn’t help it. Something seemingly harmless had to have evil intent, it’s just how people were.

Odion stood there and listened. What more could he do? Because Lani hadn’t done anything about it, Odion assumed Lani didn’t want to go after him. He hadn’t thought about how torn up Lani could become over their apparent last encounter. Odion choked down a sob, a whimper coming out instead. Odi stared at Lani as he let out his frustration. Lani would keep him here until he wasn’t confused anymore. Everything would have to make sense. Odion knew, because he knew how stubborn Lani was.

It wasn’t about either one of them, it was about both of them. Odi’s heart felt like it was going to explode. When Rhett had come back, hadn’t he said something about having Odion be a part of his story? His story. Odion watched Lani carefully. Was this their story then? Our story, Odion thought to himself, wondering if the future he saw was as accurate as he hoped it would be. And he had done everything he could to not put seeds of doubt into either Lani’s or Adrianna’s mind. At first he did this because he didn’t want to be like Rhett, but now he knew he hadn’t pushed his desires to the forefront because he knew it was the right thing to do. The latter was a harder pill to swallow. It meant he wasn’t as selfish as he thought he was. It meant Lani liked him, a lot.

“I’ve already tried telling you,” Odi said, coming to grips with Lani, “but you don’t listen.” If Lani hadn’t pinned him down, Odion might try knocking some sense into the blonde as well – with his fists. “And you don’t listen to yourself. It’s not my fault you’re confused.” Okay, so partially it was. But Odion was under the impression things were just peachy with Adrianna. So what was Lani’s problem? Odion raised his eyebrows and pressed his hands out beside him, palms facing Lani. What do you want from me?!

[Lani Hunter]

“Are you crazy?” Lani said in all honesty worried for the first time. “The past few days you’ve been all but running the opposite direction every time I see you. I mean I know I screwed up but you didn’t have to act like I didn’t exist.” Lani raised a brow and peered at Odion through the darkness. Perhaps that wasn’t what happened? Hadn’t Odion said something about his power making him lose track of time? But days? Lani wasn’t sure he bought it as much as he wished that Odion wasn’t avoiding him.

Lani raised his chin, well at least neither of them was happy at the moment, if Odion had said anything else Lani might have hit him. Lani sighed and his head actually fell back, for once it was Lani’s frustration that Odion wasn’t getting it. He took a deep breath and forced himself to be calm and listen before he started shouting his head off. His heart softened and he was starting to put two and two together. “Odion, I don’t care, what I do care about is that that’s the most truthful thing you’ve told me, what else is there?” He shook his head at Odion. “Don’t you get it? Odion, what did you think was going to happen? You made it very clear that you’re angry and you have every right to be, and I couldn’t argue with that, but I couldn’t stop you from leaving.” And in conclusion, Lani let Odion leave because his mind thought that was best, and then realized it wasn’t. But now the question was begging, how much did he really know Odion?

“Then I guess there’s blame to share,” said Lani matching Odion’s tone without malice in his eyes. His brow furrowed at the look at that Odion had on his face. And Lani thought he had been the only one who was full of self loathing. Well, how was that for another thing to have in common. He bit his tongue he had no right to go there, not when it was a liar calling out another liar. But Lani was again stuck by the admission. What was Odion saying? This made his heart warm instead of freeze over more and the wounds reacted to the heat with displeasure warning him what would happen but he didn’t care at the moment. “Odion…” Lani started but he couldn’t think of anything to say in response. That was a lot of information. At lot of implications that Lani didn’t want to deal with. But he would deal with this, that was why he was here.

“Odion,” he tried again getting a deep breath in. His eyes snappy up to Odion as he heard the whimper, this wasn’t what Lani wanted, but he had been expecting a fight and a fight he was getting but he didn’t expect so much emotion. “It was killing me to think that you might not be coming back.” There it was, the stating of the obvious but it was necessary. How strange was it that a life without Odion seemed bearable toward the end of that week then Odion came back and everything went to hell again. But Odion was right about one thing, they would be here for as long as it took for things to make sense, granted he wasn’t foolish enough to think it would work in one night, but hey, he was taking opportunities as they came.

Lani gulped when Odion started speaking again, he was really worried that he was talking about what Lani thought he was talking about. Lani hadn’t allowed himself to react to it then but now he shifted bracing his feet and planting himself firmly not so much to stop Odion but to stop himself from bolting. But unconsciously he slipped into the stance that allowed for just that. Lani shook his head. “You’re the whole reason I’m confused!” Lani blurted surprising himself. He wasn’t supposed to feel things like this, he was straight… right? He ran a hand through his hair and looked at Odion his eyes pleading into the darkness that perhaps his friend would have all the answers. But no such luck was appearing on that front.

Lani shook his head and looked at Odion hoping that his eyes could find Odion’s. Odion’s eyes always held some sort of answer, at least he could pretend they did. “I did listen,” Lani said after a few moments his head ducking, “But I don’t understand…” A hand went to his chest and his fist closed over his heart, he wanted to tear it out, look at things logically. But that would be too easy apparently for he couldn’t even get past his own shirt. No, his heart would be there forever, whether it hurt so much Lani didn’t want it or whether it was so full to bursting that Lani didn’t want to let it go.

[Odion Martins]

Maybe. Maybe he was crazy. He’d been wondering that for a long time. No one else was the way he was. No one else took things and had to think there was something more, or some sinister intent. Odion’s face grew as white as a ghost. “Few days?” No, he couldn’t have been gone that long. He’d stopped listening to Lani, because the blonde was taking this personally. It had never been that long. A couple hours tops, not days at a time. Or maybe it had been that long before, he just didn’t have anyone to help him keep track. His eyes shot up in worry to Lani. “I don’t remember.” He was going crazy.

“You could’ve stopped me Lani,” Odion said softly. It was that action that really told Odion where the stood, and how it was. Lani may have been sad to see him go, but it wasn’t unbearable. It wasn’t worth crossing over oceans for. Granted Odion hadn’t been gone all that long either, but the plan wasn’t to torture Lani, it was to try and sort through the mess in his life called Rhett. Now that that was out of the way, Odion had someone else he wanted to tend to. “But that’s not the only truthful thing I’ve ever said,” he pointed out, if only to get himself back together. He didn’t want to be broken in front of Lani, he didn’t want to lose his strength, what very little of it he had left. Odi frowned. Maybe he wasn’t getting it. “I’m confused too you know,” he said softly. Really, he really thought something was there. But it wasn’t. And he wanted to be Lani’s friend, and he was trying, so why did it have to hurt so much?

Lani called out to him, and Odion quelled the desire to scream and looked at the ground instead. Why? Why did Lani always do that? He wanted to know why he was confused but shut himself off as soon as he was onto something. Odion could hear it in the way he said his name. It drove him absolutely crazy! Again, Lani called out to him and Odion finally found the courage to look up. He held his breath. Maybe his little experiment of leaving was wrong, maybe there would’ve been a better way to test the waters, but his predictions had turned out better than he hoped for. Lani wanted him here. “Why was it killing you?” Odion asked. Now he needed to know. Lani couldn’t run away any more than he could. Lani had a physical hold on Odi, but the time turner had already worked his way into Lani’s mind. And he wasn’t letting go.

So they were on the same page. Odion had never thought they would ever talk about this, ever. His eyebrows rose in surprise. He was the reason Lani was confused? He hadn’t done anything to weasel his way into Adrianna’s place, whatever place he believed she had. “I can’t read your mind Lani, I don’t know what you don’t understand.” He would have to give Odi a little more to work with. Was Lani confused about how someone could like him? Or how someone could fall for him? Or was this about Lani Hunter, confused that a boy could like him. Was that it? Was Lani uncomfortable with that? Odion could feel a bit of rage rise inside of him as color freckled his cheeks. Lani just wanted answers, maybe he wasn’t as invested in this as Odi thought he was. Lani was still afraid of him, and afraid of himself.

“I know what I want,” Odion said harshly. He was done playing games. “Do you?”

[Lani Hunter]

Lani rolled his eyes at first at Odion’s question. Was he really that out of it? But then Odion’s face went white and Lani started to worry. Lani defenses dropped completely and he mimicked Odion’s expression before taking a hesitant step toward the redhead. “Wait, what do you mean you don’t remember?” Lani’s brow creased and he thought back to when they had fought, he had a hunch that Odion wasn’t lying about this. “Odion, what day do you think it is?” He asked afraid of the answer. Lani’s frustration and anger was ebbing as he waited for the answer, this was bad. What if Odion was losing days at a time, Lani always thought it was only a few hours at most. Well, now Lani felt like an ass, he had come out tonight and surprised by Odion’s presence had gone in with his guns blazing, shooting now and asking questions later.

Lani shook his head at Odion’s assumption. “No, I couldn’t have. Odion I was just giving you what you wanted,” he shook his head confused by what Odion had thought he could have done. “You wanted to leave and I’m the last person who has any right to try to stop you.” Lani had almost gotten Odion killed, really the last thing he had deserved was to get what he wanted at expense of what Odion wanted. Lani wanted to breath out in relief when Odion tried to convince him that it wasn’t the only truth he had given him, but how could Lani be sure? What was a truth and what was an untruth, and who could be sure one way or the other if someone thought an untruth was truth. The concept was something Lani would love to contemplate if he were to be given a little more time but he needed to be focused on the here and now at the moment. “You are?” Lani couldn’t keep himself from asking but his voice was one dusted with relief, at least he wasn’t the only one.

What a shitty day. It had been one of the worst, not at all comparable to the ones during that first week, but it had been the worst in a long time. He was starting to think that this depressing mood would finally end. That it would finally break and he could be happy again with the state of things but everything had built up again and he had spent the day hiding. Not even going to the door when someone knocked, he had just slept, so out of it and yet so aware. Lani bit his lips and looked at Odion uncomfortable with the question. His braced legs twitched but he was held here, he had to face this head on or not at all. He looked at his feet and shuffled them fidgeting, he didn’t want to admit it, he didn’t want to say anything about how much it hurt for Odion to leave, but maybe if Lani admitted to something Odion would as well, and perhaps this back and forth and running could stop. “Because I had to look at my face in the mirror,” he said looking up at Odion, “And I had to know that I was the one that pushed you away. It was killing me because you were gone and it was my fault. And I missed you.” Well he couldn’t say that for certain it was his fault completely, but that was how he had seen it.

Lani really, really wished Odion hadn’t asked that question. What wasn’t he confused about? And god, if he was going to be honest he would have to admit that he was feeling something for Odion. It was the terrible feeling that he was betraying Adrianna and then there was the other factor that Lani couldn’t ignore. Odion was a boy and Lani was a boy. And Lani had to admit that he had had strange feelings for both Adrianna and other women before her, but then there were also feelings for other men before that as well. Lani just never allowed himself to dwell on that, figuring that it was something strange that everyone went through. No, Lani wasn’t afraid that a boy liked him, he was afraid that he liked the boy back, and what that would mean. He opened his mouth to answer but then Odion asked another question.

Taking a deep breath Lani looked from his feet up to Odion. What did he want? The question itself was easy. But it wasn’t easy when he didn’t know what he wanted. He wanted Odion stay with him, so he wanted Odion? But he wanted Odion to be happy and he wanted Adrianna to be happy and he had promised he wouldn’t abandon Adrianna. So honestly Lani just wanted everything to stop for a minute so he could figure it out. Lani took a step back, now he was the one who wanted to run, how had that happened? But Lani was stuck. Maybe no physically but he was stuck. There was a flare in the pit of his stomach and he struggled to gulp down the feeling but it wouldn’t stop. “I want…” Lani hesitated; Odion had already said what he wanted a while ago, now it was Lani’s turn. “I want you to stay with me,” he said slowly but what he didn’t understand what how this had happened or how this was no betraying Adrianna. She trusted him and he felt terrible for breaking that.

[Odion Martins]

Hands flying to his head, Odion shook it, as though the answer might fall out. Then he felt something ooze down from his nose. He pressed the back of his hand towards his nose, wiping the blood away. That had been happening a lot too. His gaze shot back to Lani, trying to concentrate. That day in the library, the last day he could remember for now, was a Thursday. “Th-Thursday,” he said, not as confidently as he hoped to sound. But he wasn’t confident, he was afraid. His powers had never given him this much trouble before. He thought he could handle it. He didn’t think they were connected to his emotions. Sometimes it felt like time was slipping through his fingers yes, but he didn’t want it to happen for real.


Why did Lani have to keep saying his name? “You obviously weren’t listening,” he said, a little defeated. It would be easier for him to just tell Lani, look, I wanted you to stop me because I wanted you to want me. But that wasn’t a good card to play, because for once, Odion wasn’t concerned with what he wanted. He wanted to help Lani decide, not decide for him. Odion knew he was good at playing mind games, and for once, he wished he wasn’t so good at them. He had Lani so confused, it wasn’t helping anyone. How could he expect to get to any sort of conclusion if he was just playing with Lani? One thing was for sure, he did not want to see Lani walk out of his life like Live had after she’d fallen for him and he hadn’t returned the sentiment. Odion nodded. “You’re the master of mixed signals,” he said dismissively, followed by a wave of his hand.

Odi hadn’t meant for any of this to happen. He had warned Lani, not to fall in love with him. But wouldn’t a true thief go after the unattainable? Or at least, try to? Lani was the closest friend Odion had ever had, and he hadn’t had to know him for a long time to know that. It was right there in his heart. It maybe didn’t make sense, it definitely wasn’t playing by the rules, but he was starting to think there were no rules to this. Odion could remember another day, when they had been pretty candid with one another, and though it was a day he was meant to forget, he just couldn’t. And he hadn’t even revisited it yet. It was just damn well near impossible to forget those things they said and did, and then did nothing about. It was pure torture. But Odion liked Lani too much to do anything about it, because he knew it would hurt him.

Odion pursed his lips together, unable to grasp all Lani was saying. He swayed on the spot, taking a deep breath. He couldn’t think too hard about this, he didn’t want to see the double meanings or the room for failure and hurt. “God, I missed you Lani,” he said. Why hadn’t they done this earlier? There had to be more than a crime boss keeping Lani away. “But I had to go, I had to... clear things up with Goddard.” That man, was despicable. “I thought I could stay away, start again,” he looked at Lani with focused vision, “but I couldn’t stop thinking of you.” If Lani could get any closer to Odi’s heart he would be holding it.

If Lani needed a minute, Odion would give it to him. It was strange, he had literally all the time in the world, but right now he could feel it. Time felt normal, it felt like they were at a standstill. Lani took a step back, and Odi found himself taking his breath again. Lani wanted to run away as much as he did, wasn’t as strong as he was pretending to be either. It was a start. Odion would’ve sank to his knees were he not being held up by his shirt. “More than Adrianna?” He asked, but he wished he hadn’t. He couldn’t help himself, not when his mind was jumping around the way it was. But he still wanted to know the answer, even though it was obvious to him. It felt like he was going to slip into autopilot again. He shook his head, wanting to try again. “Then let me go,” Odion said instead, unravelling his hands that had turned into fists. He just needed one minute to make this right again, one second. If Lani wanted him to stay with him, he would need to trust Odion. “Let me go right now,” he said, a bit of desperation in his rough voice.