June Writing Challenge: When Love Is Dying

[Sean *]

It's writing challenge time! To enter, just post a ficlet (300-4000 words suggested) in this thread. When the voting for this month's OTM winners comes around, a voting poll will go up for this as well.

The Challenge: Write a story about a relationship ending. Ideally, this should be a breakup, but solo character death is also acceptable. If using character death, only one member of the relationship may die; the other member (or members if poly) must go on without them. There may be no quick fixes (e.g. breaking up at the beginning and then getting back together); the pairing may not be together by the end of the story.

The rules:

• Characters must be in Hammel canon, but the ficlets are not canon unless explicitly stated.
  
• The pairing involved must be site canon: either a current pairing or one that existed through past threads, Time Warps, journal entries, or in the character's application.
  
• Entries must be more than 300 words.
  
• You can enter no more than three ficlets. Any ficlets posted after the original 3 will not be considered for voting. If you want to post more, however, have fun.
  
• Story entries must be titled.

[Deleted]

You Should Have Listened

{Trigger Warning: Violence, Character Death}


“You really scared me back there.”

Phoenix shot a smile back at the younger boy, reaching back to link their fingers together and give Oriel a supportive squeeze. “I’ve been in tighter scrapes before,” he assured him, slowing down enough to pause and press a quick peck against his lover’s cheek. “Trust me, that guy was more scared of us than we were of him.”

That was likely an exaggeration. The guy had been twice Phoenix’s size, and a good portion larger than Oriel as well. The dark, dank alleys in nighttime Seattle weren’t safe by any means – especially not this portion of town. Even more so with the boys’ affiliation with a particular gang whose reputation was starting to crumble as rivals had begun getting bolder and breaching territory borders; only two nights ago, one of their friends had been sent to a hospital with multiple knife wounds in a particularly nasty brawl. He’d be okay; it was what one risked, being involved with such people. He was lucky he hadn’t been killed.

The guy they’d just bumped into happened to be an especially violent, manipulative man who had a pretty awful reputation among gossip. For some reason, he’d let the two of them go; Phen tried to convince himself that it’d been him pulled out his knife that had spooked him, but he probably wasn’t kidding anyone.

Including Oriel. The boy snorted, shaking his head as he pulled Phoenix forward, wanting to get out of the area as soon as they could. “He was a lot of things, but he wasn’t scared,” he replied. “Stop bullshitting, Squish.”

The scrawny boy pouted. “I don’t know why he would have just let us go like that,” he mumbled.

“Maybe he didn’t think we were worth the trouble. I don’t know.” Oriel scowled. “Just… Don’t make a habit of running off away from me like that, okay? Especially around here. “ He wrapped his arm around Phoenix’s shoulder, possessively pulling him close while they walked.

“I can take care of myself,” Phoenix protested, his own brow furrowing. “I’m not helpless, you know.”


“You kidding?” Oriel snorted, prodding his finger against the smaller boy’s skinny chest. “I don’t know how you ever survived without me. Not only do you attract trouble like a magnet, but all someone would have to do is snap you like a toothpick and that’d be it.”

Phoenix’s expression went colder. Even though he knew it was true, it still stung to hear it. “I’ve got my knives,” he replied sourly. “I can do damage to people if I have to.” He had in the past. It was that, along with his ability to manage to wriggle himself out of situations, that had got him this far.

“Yeah, those tiny little things. What good would they do against someone three times your weight? Like him?” Oriel pointed back the way they’d come. “They’d just be a little thorn in their skin. Hardly even wounds.”

Huffing, Phoenix shrugged off the younger boy’s arm, starting to walk faster. He didn’t say anything, but he was obviously upset with how the conversation had gone.

“Hey, Phoenix, wait-“ Oriel picked up the pace to keep up, but he wasn’t going to apologize for what he’d said. It was all true, and they both knew it. “Don’t be like this. “

“I’m fine!” the Korean boy lied. He kept his eyes forward, feeling hurt and sad and frustrated. Stupid Oriel, he didn’t need him, he could survive on his own…! “I’m going home.”

Oriel slowed down again, hesitating. “I’ll come with you,” he replied.

“No. I’ll be fine.”

“Phoenix,” he said with exasperation. But by that point, his boyfriend had passed around a corner, and Oriel had to break into a jog to catch u-

The scream that pierced the air made Oriel’s body go numb. No.

He sprinted around the corner, stumbling to a horrified halt at the scene before him. Phoenix could have been sleeping, draped limply against the body of the man they’d thought they’d managed to get away from, except for the bloody, carved smile on his throat, and his wide-open eyes that stared at nothing.

“PHOENIX! Oriel screamed. “I’ll kill you, I’ll kill-!”

But like smoke, and much too quickly for someone the man’s size, he disappeared into the shadows, leaving the skinny ghost of a body to fall heavily to the ground. Oriel ran to him, too shocked to cry, too numb to do anything other than pick Phoenix up in his arms and cradle him against his chest.

“Wake up,” he said, his voice quiet, demanding.

“Wake up.”

Those dark eyes, always so full of life and happiness despite the life they lived, were dull and motionless now.

“I said…. Wake UP!”

[Adaryn Breslin]

She Saved Me

{Trigger Warning: Character Death. Accident}

Trees blurred past in a streak of continuous green which kept the Empath’s mind occupied for the time being while Monroe was in the driver’s seat with weary eyes on the road. Occasionally, his mouth would open as if he were going to say something, but each time he did, it closed as if he changed his mind at the last minute. It wasn’t his fault that he didn’t have any money to pay for a place of his own; even if he had gotten a job, there was no way he could even afford even a studio apartment. It was the only way, and he knew for a fact Adaryn realized it, that he would be able to stay in Pilot Ridge. With Her.

His mouth opened up again just in time for Adaryn to turn to look at him, a disappointment on her faced masked by evident confusion. “You look like you’re trying to say something,” Addie said, not really sure what else to say but the obvious, clearly unable to think up anything better than that after such a long stretch of silence.

Monroe hesitated, but eventually, he just spoke, albeit carefully, but the Dream Walker eventually formed words nonetheless. “I wa- I mean, I am. I just don’t want you to be mad at me about this. I care about you, I’m dating you. Eloise is my roommate and friend, just like she is yours, Addie.”

Almost instantly, Adaryn’s gaze went back to the passing trees. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to believe nothing would come of their living together, but Sebastian had yet to confirm his dream to be false or truth and that uncertainty cause her own insecurities to flourish. It was harder now than it was in the dorms, because at least they were separated by an entire floor of dorms, but now they shared everything. There was also the fact that they had driven an hour for a date, and then were forced to come back forty five minutes in because Eloise had told texted Monroe informing him that something huge had come up and they needed to speak in person. Even despite Monroe’s begging for her to wait, she ultimately offered to pay for their next date, whatever they wanted, but Eloise had explained several times it was incredibly important. They ended up leaving shortly after.

“I’m not mad at you, Monroe. I’m just tired.” She was tired, and she wasn’t mad because it wasn’t his fault for the things that were occurring, but she just was so tired of fighting and explaining her insecurities that she just opted for silence, a method she had been using since she had manifested, and while it wasn’t the greatest for her mental issues, it was the safest for her emotions. It was safest for them.

“I may be sleep deprived, but I have eyes that are no longer covered by long hair, and so that means I can see that you aren’t looking at me. And if you weren’t mad, you would be looking at me.” Please look at me, Monroe pleaded in his mind, his focus completely on her at that moment. The highway was clear, nobody in front, behind, or beside him. Just a moment, a single moment, but when he caught her eye, he noticed the sudden fear in them.

“MONROE. The road!” She screamed, and Monroe’s eyes ripped away to look at the road and sure enough, there was an animal standing in the middle of the road.
“Shit!” He cried out, swerving. But at 70 miles an hour, the sudden jerk of the car caused them to flip not once, not twice, but four times. All Monroe could hear was screaming, Addie’s screaming, and crashing metal. He could feel the glass from the windshield dig into his face, he could feel the pain of the metal caving in on him and trapping him inside the car, he could feel the safety belt digging into his skin, but the most memorable and terrifying was the screaming coming from Brunette, fearful and pleading, wishful of safety. Monroe, she cried, Monroe! That is, until the car flipped the last time.

Then the screaming stopped.

It just stopped.

He was too jarred, too dazed, to immediately check on his counterpart. He was just glad the screaming, the screeching of metal, and the initial pain of the glass impaling him had stopped, but the minute he regained his ability to focus, a sense of dread filled him. He choked, his breathing coming in gasps as he realized that Addie was screaming and then she stopped.

“Adaryn!” He forced out, turning to the girl beside him, eyes clouding over with pain the minute he saw her limp body, eyes closed, her head limply pressed against her chest which failed to move up and down with breath –with life—like he was expecting. “Adaryn!” He cried out again, reaching out for her, but his touch didn’t cause her to stir, no matter how hard he tried. He fumbled for the phone in his pocket, and though the screen was now cracked, he had the sense to call 911.

“Adaryn… you’ll be fine. Just hold on…” He pleaded with her as the dispatcher answered the phone.

--------------------------------------------------------------

She wasn’t fine.

Pronounced DOA, Adaryn was removed from the car with a panicked Monroe trying to wrap his mind around what had happened. He convinced himself she wasn’t dead; after all, Adaryn had dealt with even worse and still lived. She couldn’t be dead. No, she couldn’t.

And even the day that he stood at her gravestone, he still couldn’t believe it.
All the things he wished he could say sat on his tongue as he placed the white roses – not red, because red reminded her of anger and hatred—on the dirt plot in front of the stone that read ‘A Hidden Gem. Adaryn Breslin 1997-2014.’

He wanted to tell her that there was no reason to be upset, to feel insecure, because it turned out Eloise and Monroe were siblings. ‘Yes, siblings’, he wanted to say, ‘Just siblings. We’re twins’. He wanted to tell her that he wanted to kiss her and to hold her for as long as she would let him, and then some. He wanted to let her know she was wanted. But those words were lost on his tongue, because she could never hear them.

But what hurt worse than the idea of her never hearing him say those things was the idea that he would never hear her again. He’d never hear her laugh or her voice again, he’d never be able to hold her hand, never be able to hear her teasing him. Adaryn was gone, and he couldn’t accept that.

Addie was gone because of him, after all, if he were to have been paying attention, it would have never happened. Monroe was distraught, but he knew that for her sake, he had to continue living his sleep deprived life to the best of his ability because Addie would want that for him. And so he did.

And funny how a few months later he had gotten the best sleep he had ever received in his life, a dream of his own rather than someone else’s, with Adaryn standing in the same dress she wore in the first time she had met him, except this time instead of fearful eyes, there was nothing but joy.

“Monroe,” She laughed.

And in that moment, he realized that everything was okay. That simple encounter was the one thing that managed to propel him forward to continue living and push for the reality he wished for, a life where his power wasn’t controlling him and he could actually live without the need for caffeine and coffee.

She saved him, even though he failed to save her.

[Gryphon Matsuoka]

Faraway, So Close

>Trigger Warning: Character Death, Accident<

Gryphon dragged Kodi outside, into the garden behind the LGBT center, half because he had the strength to, and half because Kodi wasn't fighting back. He seethed, letting go of Kodi and swivelling round to look at him, "You're bein' ridiculous, seriously!" Gryph exclaimed, self-conscious that he might be being a bit loud and disturbing, but this was more important, "There's bein' jealous, and then there's bein' overprotective, an' at some point, you crossed that line!"

Kodi growled and scowled up at him, "I know I can be fuckin' jealous, I couldn't help it! He was too close t'you!"

Gryph scoffed and folded his arms, "Just 'cause he got a little closer than you could deal with doesn't give you permission t'punch him square in the jaw!" He breathed for a few seconds, shaking his head, "You could've said somethin'!"

Kodi snorted, "Like you would listen, you were too busy flirting with that fuckin' nerd t'hear me!"

Gryphon let out an exasperated laugh and shook his head, hands going to his face as he began to pace, trying to process all this, "Jesus Christ..." He came to a pause and looked back at Kodi, hands dropping "So I'm not allowed t'talk t'other people now, is that it?"

"Not when they're lookin' like that!" The dentokinetic pointed in the general direction of the door, or the center itself. Gryph considered this - it was pretty revealing - the guy'd been wearing a suit jacket and nothing underneath and... well, he obviously worked out. But it wasn't like Gryphon felt strongly attracted by those things. In some people, he would think it was sexy, but Gryph didn't care. He growled slightly - apparently Kodi wasn't the only one capable of doing so, "Don't you think I get jealous too? Just standing around with you, hearing you compliment other guys and check them out and shit?" He huffed, "I understand, they're muscular, they're male, so you think they're hot, but for God's sake," He laughed again, "I'm your Goddamn boyfriend, yet I don't think half of the people in there know that."

"'Course people know."

"So why'd I get hit on by like, four guys who asked me if I was single?"

Kodi growled in annoyance that there were other people flirting with Gryphon too, "Why is it so important t'you? For people t'know?"

Gryph looked at him incredulously, "D'you..." He paused and tilted his head slightly, eyes narrowing, "You think I'm fishin' for attention." He scowled, "I want people t'know so I don't go back t'my bed and find a stranger in my place!"

"You think I'd do that? After all this time, you think I'd just go fuck someone else, 'cause I could."

Gryph remained silent, and that spoke louder than any words could.

"You fucking bastard!"

"I'm a bastard? 'Cause I'm worried about being cheated on? Yeah sure, makes me a real bastard. A true asshole."

"Don't you trust me?"

"I don't know! I just..." He sighed, "I just don't know."

The silence rose slowly, and then was popped, "Why d'you bother?" Kodi said, a hint of anger still in his voice.

Gryph twitched, "What d'you mean?"

"I make your life crap, why d'you bother with me?"

Gryph sighed, "You don't make my life crap. Like, sure, recently, I've been the most stressed out I've ever been, worryin' about exams, and you, and not knowin' what t'do about..." He looked at Kodi and sighed, "I just don't know what t'do sometimes, and I wish I did."

Kodi paused and looked back, "I dunno either."

Gryph asked himself, why do I bother? Well, because he loved him. He loved him when he was himself, and he was working with the other boy to break the other side apart, but they honestly didn't seem to be making much progress. And Gryphon was trying to help as much as he could, but... he didn't know. He didn't know if he was making a difference at all anymore. He sighed, "I'm gonna," he motioned towards the doors. Kodi sighed as well, and nodded, following, but Gryphon stopped him, "...by myself."

Kodi paused, "Why?"

"I just... need time t'think."

Kodi let him go, and Gryphon walked through the doors and back into the center, but a few moments later, the dentokinetic began to catch up, "Gryph,"

Gryphon looked back a little and sighed, "Kodi, just leave me alone for a while, please," he said, over the music. He walked quickly through the room and out of the front. Kodi followed, cautiously, slowly. When he was walking through the front doors, Gryph was a fair distance away. He looked at him, wondering if he should say something.

He remained silent, and just watched as he began to cross the road, but... there was a car coming, why was he... Kodi sprinted as fast as he could, "GRYPHON!" Gryph looked behind him, and inevitably, to.the side, seeing the car. But that wasn't his last sight.

It was Kodi's.

Gryphon shook his head out of its sluggish daze of being knocked back with a strong push, and groaned, trying to stand up. He blinked a few times and looked around. Some medical person told him to stay sat down, stay calm, but something was wrong. Kodi pushed him out of the way, so... Kodi.

Still in his unstable state, Gryph tried to run over to the car nearby, feeling pain in his elbow but ignoring it as he slammed his hands down on the car body to use as a support. He moved around it and tried to push through the numerous people on the floor, and walking around, mumbling about seeing someone. One of them got a firm hold on him and he cracked, "NO, I wanna SEE HIM!" It hurt even more to struggle, and he didn't have the capacity to, so he kind of pulled and then flopped onto the ground, curling into a ball and watching them with his arms around his legs and his head on his knees. He was adamant not to move and let no one try to budge him.

They started moving, and so did he, trying to get nearer but not getting close. Someone tried to tell him calmly that he needed to be examined, but he refused to cooperate until he saw Kodi. He had to see him, he had to...

---------

The staff in Kodi's ward knew Gryph pretty well by this point. Three weeks and two days, and he came in everyday possible, even if it was just to give Kodi a kiss on the head and tell him he couldn't stick around, but wanted to come say hi and check he was alright. He was in a coma - the staff said that he might be able to hear what Gryph was saying and feel it if he touched him, so he talked to him. Everyday. Held his hand, kissed him, brushed back his hair with his fingers. He came in and told stories about the university, about their friends, about anything and everything he could think of. Somedays, he brought someone like Oriel with him too, but that always made it harder for him to talk. He would sit and let them do the talking, holding Kodi's hand and just being there. One day, he even brought in the Fault in Our Stars and read parts of it to him. He did whatever he could to try and show Kodi that he was still there.

That day, he was just talking to Kodi, about Kodi. Saying how he hadn't put his eyeliner on in weeks, but he was still beautiful. How he loved him, and that once he woke up, he would never let him go again; they would never fight and it would be fine. Everything would be fine. They would be fine. They would go to a bookstore and buy him anything he wanted, and then he laughed, saying how they usually ended up kissing instead, but then saying he'd be fine with anything that happened, because it would be with him.

One of the machines began to continuously beep, and Gryphon's brow furrowed. He called for a nurse and was pushed out of the way by a few medical staff, who studied the boy and began to try to resuscitate. Gryph just stood and watched, grabbing one of the nurses wasn't doing anything and saying, "He'll be fine, right?" They apologized and said they couldn't tell. He was ushered out of the room and he sat impatiently in a chair or something, his head in his hands, repeating again and again under his breath that it would be fine. Because it would. It'd be fine.

He processed the sound of footsteps and looked up. The nurse looked directly at him and he gave her a look of hope, but her face remained neutral. He asked her, "Is he alright?"

She remained silent. And that spoke louder than words ever could.

He refused to believe it. No. Kodi was stronger than that, he wasn't... he wasn't...! He asked to see him in a less confident voice than he expected.

Gryphon looked at the even more lifeless body in front of him, and tried to finish what he was saying before, "I don't care what happens, 'cause," He looked at Kodi again, smiling weakly and feeling his eyes prickle, "...'cause it'll be with you. And I-I love bein' with you."

He sat down and took up one of Kodi's cold hands, his speech becoming more shaken and distorted, "And I kn-now you're gonna fight this, and we'll b-be together, and... and I-I can't wait." Gryph squeezed his lifeless hand, "I-I love you with a-all my heart, a-and I always will." He kissed that hand, put it back and slowly stood up, taking a huge shaky breath and looking down at him, trying to smile and not being able to, "I-I'll see you tomorrow." He said, like he did everytime, and left the room.

And then he cried. Once he was out of hearing range, he just broke down and cried and cried, feeling his body shake and distort as each sob wracked through him. Because Kodi wasn't dead, so he wouldn't cry in front of him. He wouldn't make him feel upset, he wouldn't want to make him want to cry too.

Kodiak Lee Oubre was declared to be dead on the 2nd of March, 2015 at 17:34. May his soul rest in peace.

[Joshua Bernstein]

Disconnect the Dots

Sometimes what you think you want isn't what you really wanted when you get it.


Four years.

Josh and Sean had been reconciled four years now. Josh had long since sold his house; they had opened a joint bank account, they slept in the same room and the same bed. They'd cared for a foster child together. He'd come out to his family in order to share his newly established romance, the culmination of decades long daydreams.

Domestic bliss.

That was what he'd striven for, what he'd expected, but the reality was far different than the fantasy he had built up in his mind. The fantasy was romance and passion and laughter and holidays at the coast and long weekends on the lake.

The reality was an oppressive blanket of secrecy that lay thick about Sean. The older man had a penchant for cryptic remarks and a refusal to ever explain them, because it "isn't my secret to divulge."

This would have been easier to accept without the cryptic remarks that brought attention to the fact that he knew something Josh didn't. Instead this only resulted in the attorney feeling as if there was a physical barrier between the two of them, preventing him from ever coming as near to his partner as he desired.

Sean advocated communication, but somehow when the two of them were involved communication broke down. Josh was certain that the telepath had needs that he wasn't meeting, but Sean always deflected with questions like "do you think I'm a doormat?"

And then Josh felt bad, because he although he thought that Sean was capable of taking care of himself, he also had seen his partner in previous relationships and how much he martyred himself, and he could see it happening here, too, but he couldn't seem to bring it up without fumbling everything.

It was wearing on him, this inability to discuss their relationship. He felt disconnected.

He had begun staying late at work, looking up apartment listings and moving services. He couldn't break up and remain under the same roof as Sean, and unlike last time he couldn't move back in with his parents.

He hired movers to come while Sean was at work once he'd signed on the apartment and then texted Sean.

we need to talk.


His stomach twisted in knots the entire rest of the day. He could barely concentrate, too anxious about the impending break up. His hands shook as he cycled home. His breath was unsteady as he entered the house. When Sean greeted him with a hug he drew back.

He needed to make it quick, or he would lose his nerve. As he handed Sean the key to the house he whispered, "I'm sorry."

[Remle Boyd]

NEVER GONNA BE ALONE
(a songfic with credit to nickelback)

Time, is going by, so much faster than I,
And I'm starting to regret not spending all of it with you.
Now I'm, wondering why, I've kept this bottled inside,
So I'm starting to regret not telling all of this to you.
So if I haven't yet, I've gotta let you know...

This is how it ended.

Remle sat at the kitchen table, fingers absently rubbing against the fine silk of the table cloth. Her roommate had gone to stay with her parents for the weekend just for this, so Remle could have the privacy she so desperately wanted when she finally told her boyfriend what she’d been trying to say unsuccessfully for two months now. When it had become apparent that the words were never going to come themselves she had hunted through every single romantic song library on the internet until she found what she was looking for. A song that expressed what she felt, for him…for them…what he wanted to hear, what she had wanted to say.

It mockingly played on repeat and she couldn’t muster the energy to turn it off.

She didn’t know how to say that she’d always be there for him, that she would support him, comfort him, love him. Remle knew she wasn’t the easiest person to get along with; it had been rather obvious when her parents had dropped her into therapy when she was ten. She had difficulty expressing affection because she’d never had to before, she thought such acts were incredibly personal and should be shared privately…she thought it was more romantic that way.

He hadn’t thought so and she had gone to great lengths to just hold his hand in public. It didn’t matter how many times she wiggled her way into his personal space when they were alone, he kept insisting that he wanted everyone to know about them, because he was proud to be her boyfriend. She was never comfortable with that mentality but could easily admit to herself that she had different world views on many things. There was also that part of her that got jealous whenever her boyfriend spoke with another girl far more animatedly than he spoke with her, or focused all of his attention on that person while she wanted politely nearby. Maybe it was the same feelings he was having.

But…even though he said he wanted everyone to know she was his girlfriend he’d never introduced her as such. Even to his friends. There had been a perfunctory introduction of: “This is Remle,” and then some strange sort of head nod that could have honestly meant anything between friends. Was she his girlfriend? His booty call? WHAT?

Maybe wanting that definitive place in his life had driven her to this decision.

And now, as long as I can, I'm holding on with both hands,
'Cause forever I believe that there's nothing I could need but you,
So if I haven't yet, I've gotta let you know...

She wanted to make it work. She knew she felt things for him, deep things…love.

She loved him. When she had free time in the day she couldn’t help but piece together a life in which they stayed together. She daydreamed about their wedding, where they’d go on their honeymoon, what married life would be like. Her imagination had even conjured their children with names and personality traits. She lived a lifetime in her daydreams and that life only got better every time her thoughts went in that direction and they always seemed to.

It got to the point where she couldn’t control it, she’d spend her hours of sleeplessness giggling about quiet mornings together, dancing together for the first time at their wedding, how he might propose to her, how happy, surprised and nervous she would be to say yes. She was very good at hiding this of course because it was embarrassing. She tried to stop but she couldn’t, she wanted it…she wanted it all. The fairytale wedding, the perfect life afterwards; most of all she wanted to believe that she had found the person she could spend the rest of her life with…she never thought that would happen.

You've gotta live every single day,
Like it's the only one, what if tomorrow never comes?
Don't let it slip away,
Could be our only one, you know it's only just begun.

As a general rule she never panicked. Until last week when it had become apparent that her boyfriend was still unhappy with the level of affection she bestowed upon him while they were outside the comfort of her apartment. She had begun to think that his words were a reflection of his uncertainty. She’d never said “I love you” before but it was strikingly obvious that a more concrete type of confession was necessary to prove her feelings. She was thankful for her insomnia as she rushed to put the details together. She asked her mother some incredibly embarrassing questions, read articles, tried to sit through an “instructional video” before exiting in embarrassment and finally breaking down and buying some uncomfortable lingerie among some other…supplies.

It was going to be her first time after all; it was supposed to be special.

Even though she’d turned beet red explaining the situation to her roommate, she had secured the apartment for her tryst and planned the night extensively. She had been rather distant in the days leading up to her surprise because she’d been so nervous about it. That afternoon she had showered and put a casserole in the oven. She’d set the table formally and put her song on repeat. She had the schedule in her head. He’d come to the door and she’d greet him. There’d be dinner and conversation, she’d turn the music up louder and with her heart on her sleeve she’d let him listen and….and then she’d take his hand and they’d go down the hall to her room and the rest would be perfect.

Every single day,
Maybe our only one, what if tomorrow never comes?
Tomorrow never comes...

Except he didn’t come when he said he would.

She waited for thirty minutes before trying to call him, then she texted him, then she checked her emails just in case she had missed something. Facebook didn’t lend any clues and when she tried calling again the phone simply rang.

An hour went by as she took the now dry casserole out of the oven and looked forlornly at her phone. She could try one more time at least before she gave up for good. Maybe he forgot, or there was an emergency? She sat down and pulled his number back on her speed dial. However before she could dial, her phone rang.

Time, is going by, so much faster than I,
And I'm starting to regret not telling all of this to you.

She’d never yelled at someone over the phone before.

No one had ever pleaded with her before.

She’d never made someone cry…no one had ever made her cry before, not like this.

Six months of her life suddenly meant nothing because he couldn’t bear being with her anymore. She choked out what she’d been trying to tell him for the last eight weeks only to have him laugh hysterically in her ear.

“You wait six months to say that? What the hell is wrong with you? WE’RE BREAKING UP!”

“But…but I, I’ve been trying-,”

“Apparently we have two VERY different definitions about what that word means. Goodbye Remle.” At least he had the decency to sound regretful as the phone disconnected. She held her phone in shaking hands as she slumped in her chair and felt her shoulders drop.

A whimper finally escaped…then a trail of tears marched resolutely down her cheeks before they were finally followed by a sob as she buried her face in her hands. She’d experienced physical vulnerability plenty of times…feeling it emotionally was unpleasant in the extreme. A small piece of her died inside. She had tried so hard to make him happy. She had shared more things with him in six months than she had shared with anyone she had known at Hammel since she was eleven. How had he never realized that every moment she spent with him was her way of saying that he was special to her? That when she came home and called him, when she talked to him for more than thirty seconds about how her day was it meant something.

The song on repeat reached its last chorus.

You're never gonna be alone
From this moment on, if you ever feel like letting go,
I won't let you fall.
When all hope is gone, I know that you can carry on.
We're gonna see the world out,
I'll hold you 'til the hurt is gone.

Her hand fumbled for the remote and the song…among other things, finally ended.

[Dr. Sean Neville]

50 Ways to Leave Your Lover

You don't need to discuss much.
Just drop off the key, Lee,
And get yourself free.

we need to talk.

Rarely did that combination of words serve as a prelude to something positive. Occasionally, someone with the requisite maturity, precision of language, and proper interpersonal skills used that phrase to refer to a positive, or neutral, situation - perhaps to indicate the need to simply check in after a difficult event or to reschedule theater tickets due to a long day at work. Sean himself had used that phrase for its literal and most basic meaning in neutral situations before.

However, Josh had texted him that.

The telepath loved his partner with every fiber of his being, but he knew the younger man’s flaws. Josh had a thousand traits that made him a good attorney, a good friend, and a good lover, but he lacked the requisite combination of emotional deft and self-awareness to achieve a neutral objective.

As a result, Sean spent the rest of the day mentally reviewing the past few weeks. Fortunately, with the end of the semester, his job consisted primarily of paperwork while the students underwent final exams; this left him with plenty of time alone with his own thoughts.

His partner had worked late for several weeks, sometimes not returning until well after the last hint of sunlight had faded from the sky. As a result, he had not baked in that same period of time. Despite their mutual agreement to cut back on liquor, Josh had started drinking more, although not approaching the same levels prior to his hypertension. He spent more time reading alone, although he said that everything was “fine.”

Sean didn’t believe him when he said that; decades of experience with thousands of people, particularly Josh, had taught him how to discern a true remark from mere protestation. However, the telepath was a man of his word, and he had vowed to give Josh all of the personal space that the younger man desired. This included allowing his partner the ability to process according to his own pace.

Perhaps it was work. Sean knew how stressful the legal system could be, even if most of his experience was second-hand through Josh, or otherwise due to the relatively recent development with Lani. His partner coped with work stress, because he was an excellent attorney, but, as he lacked healthy stress-management skills on the whole, there existed bleed-over.

Perhaps it was his father. Bobby Bernstein’s mental faculties had deteriorated over several years, and Alzheimer’s eventually killed its host, one way or another. For Josh’s sake, the telepath hoped that it wasn’t related to his father’s health. Despite being fifty-four, the attorney had never lost anyone close to him, not the way that Sean had. As unrealistic an expectation as it was, and as undoubtedly infantilizing as it could be, the telepath didn’t want to inflict that on the younger man. Not yet.

Perhaps discovering that Simon and Saul lived outside of town, together, had caused decades-old feelings of guilt to resurface. Josh always withdrew when he felt guilty, even from those unrelated to his guilt spiral.

Perhaps it was something else altogether.

Whatever the underlying reason, Sean resolved to meet Josh with open arms and to listen to whatever his partner wanted, or needed, to say. They would get through this.

He took a detour on the way home, stopping at Ari’s so that he could buy Josh something special. In his experience, it was easier to talk on a full stomach, particularly over something sweet.

As a result, the telepath had only arrived home a few minutes before Josh and had not had the opportunity to go upstairs to change. Upon hearing the door open, he emerged from the kitchen and quickly approached his partner to sweep him into a gentle, albeit supportive, embrace.

Distressingly, Josh pushed him away.

A moment later, the younger man pressed something into his palm, coupled with a whispered, “I’m sorry.”

Reflexively, the telepath curled his fingers towards his palm. He felt the outline of the object: a key.

No.

Not again.

“We can talk,” he said, looking down at the other man with concerned blue eyes.

“We can’t.” Josh swallowed around the lump in his throat. “I can’t. I’m sorry.” With that, he turned around, unable to face the telepath any longer, and he started for the door.

Every instinct Sean had told him to reach for the younger man, but he did not. He would not, could not, do anything to physically impede the attorney from leaving this house. Just as he would not, could not, use his powers to forcibly change Josh’s mind.

Instead, he asked, “Where will you go?”

If the younger man heard him, he said nothing. Josh simply kept walking, crossed the threshold, and returned to his bicycle to lead him off the property.

The telepath remained frozen, watching the attorney’s retreating form until he had disappeared from sight.

It took little time for Sean to find himself upstairs in their bedroom. Josh’s nightstand held nothing but the coaster he used for his water glass. His planner was gone. His eyeglass case was gone. The bottle of hypertension pills was gone. The drawer was empty.

All of Josh’s drawers were empty. His closet was empty. Nothing in the room indicated that there had been a second occupant, aside from the lingering presence he felt and the faint scent of avocado soap.

It took less time for Sean to find himself downstairs again, head buried in the liquor cabinet. In a blur, he had dug out the bottle of scotch that he had been saving for their anniversary. The telepath fought every instinct to simply open the bottle and drink straight, and instead he pulled out a highball glass, poured a sizable portion, and drained it in one smooth motion.

Again and again and again.

Soon enough, the bottle was empty, and it was as though he had drunk it straight. Although, this way, the telepath could pretend that he had exercised self-control.

The rest of the evening passed alone with another bottle and his glass.

By morning, he was disheveled, hung-over, and in pain from having passed out on the sofa.

He no longer possessed his peak condition, and his back and knees protested the position in which they’d spent the night.

The last time that this had happened, 300 miles away and a lifetime ago, Sean had faced the prospect of spending the rest of his life alone, and worse yet, separate, and the notion had shaken him to his core.

Now, the rest of his life consisted of considerably fewer years, and he had decades of life experience to bolster his foundation. Yet, he found the prospect of separation no less daunting.

Unlike the first time, Sean had nobody in his corner. Robert had died a decade ago. His only relative was his nephew, who, while supportive, was not an appropriate outlet for problems in the telepath’s personal life. All of his closest friends had either moved to parts unknown, like Anya had, or were mutual friends, like Danny, and the telepath could not ruin Josh’s reputation in their collective social circle. Sean didn’t know how to begin broaching this topic with Greg or Daphne again, particularly when Greg had his own personal issues and Daphne lived so far away. Who else could he talk to? One of his ex-lovers with whom he had retained friendship? Unlikely.

If he had a different power, perhaps it would hurt less. Perhaps Josh never would have left him a second time, or the first time. Perhaps, instead, he would be able to astral project himself to visit or otherwise give Josh space or to share a different sort of intimacy. Or perhaps instead he could...what, animate a puppet of the attorney using his woodcarvings and a pair of James Campbell’s glasses?

His head hurt. He could no more contemplate life or relationships with a different power than he could imagine never having met Josh.

Pressure built behind his eyes, but he didn’t have the luxury of crying, no more than he had the luxury of sampling the hair of the dog.

He had to shower and shave and dress, so that he no longer reeked of alcohol and desperation. He had to be at his desk at Hammel on time, so that he could listen to student and staff problems and provide a sympathetic ear and sage advice.

Doctor Neville, the psychiatrist and administrator, had to be strong and calm and patient and perfect like he was every day. He didn’t have the luxury of letting Sean Neville, the man grieving the death of his most important relationship, continue to wallow in his weaknesses.

At least not during school hours.

However... tonight after school had ended for the day...

He had nowhere to be, and he could drink until he felt nothing at all. That would be a challenge, because the emptiness threatened to consume him. But he had alcohol enough for two. Josh hadn’t raided the liquor cabinet when moving out, which meant it was all that Sean had left of the other man.

Sober, the telepath knew that this was a poor substitute. Drunk, it didn’t matter.

His knees protested the slow trudge up the stairs. Drunk, he would feel no pain.

Eleven hours.

Eleven hours from now, he could return home with no obligations and drink in lieu of supper.

He had a date with a highball glass. Without Josh in his life, that highball glass was the only date he would have. The highball glass might never love him, but it would also never leave him, even when it found itself as empty as he was.

[Lani Hunter]

With Broken Glass to Hold
by: Bre and Izy

"Where are we?" Odion asked as Lani dragged him along by the hand. Ireland was a lot rainier than Odion had expected, not that he didn't know, it just seemed a lot more lush in pictures.

"You'll see, it's a surprise," Lani said, his eyes bright and nearly glowing. Odion could only smile and let out a little laugh, thinking of how wonderful and thoughtful Lani was. It was a great day to be in love.

Approaching a sizable house tucked away amidst the rolling hills, Odion was happy to duck out of the rain and into the protection of the doorway. There wasn't anything exceptional about the house itself, it looked like any other in the countryside. Odion and Lani had passed many like it on their way here, only two more sets of footprints on the already well travelled path.

Odion glanced around while Lani rapped on the door excitedly. Everything seemed to slow to a halt as he stared at something straight above the doorway. A plaque, worn with age still bore the family name, etched deeply into the wood, beads of rain rolled through the grooves and seemed to cut the letters deeper. O'Callahan.

Declyn opened the door, and a warm smile was shared between him and Lani. Odion looked on, too shocked to move, too shocked to react as they exchanged some kind of greeting. He couldn't even hear his own haggard breathing over the ringing in his ears. This must have been what it felt like to drown.

Someone was calling him back, but he was already making a speedy getaway.

“That’s not my name!” He yelled, looking back momentarily, a woman of middle age already past the doorway, past Declyn and Lani. Odion choked back a sob, gritting his teeth and making a run for it. Everything was happening too quickly for him to keep up, too quickly for his power to comprehend.

And after the running time turner and past the crying mother came Lani, after him. The telekinetic’s hand closed around Odion’s wrist a fair distance from the house, it couldn’t even be seen over the hills that surrounded them and the damp narrow road. The hill concealed Odion’s family and the distress of his mother, which left Lani looking at Odion with a mixture of disappointment and guilt.

“Hold up, Odion,” Lani said, “Hold on.” It was clear on the blond’s face that he knew he’d screwed up.

“Leave me alone, Lani!” Odion snapped, hurt hiding behind anger. He jerked his arm free and Lani let him get a few more steps before he trotted after him.

This was Odion’s family, Lani couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t want to know them. “Listen, I’m sorry, I should have told you. But I thought --”

“You thought what?” Odion turned so quickly the telekinetic had to backpedal to keep from running into him. “You thought we’d have a happy reunion and be a big happy family, did you?”

“That’s not --”

Odion ignored him. “How could you do this to me? Fuck, Lani! When are you going to stop lying to me?”

“I wanted to help!” Lani blurted, “Declyn asked me to help, so I did.”

“And you lied to me!” Odion’s eyes were starting to get blurry.

“You wouldn’t have come if I’d told you!” Lani shot back.

Odion waved a frustrated hand. “Of course I wouldn’t have!”

Lani waved a hand as Odion verified his point. Odion glared at his boyfriend, his heart aching with the betrayal. Was he ever going to stop? There was no honor among thieves, no honesty, but he had truly thought they had gotten past that. It nagged at so many doubts in his mind.

“And that’s why Declyn came to me! Odion they’re your family,” Lani was trying very hard to be reasonable.

“They threw me away!” Odion shouted, why didn’t Lani understand, that was not something that could be fixed, they didn’t want him then and he wanted nothing to do with them now. They didn’t get to have a second chance with him!

“Did you even look at her?” Lani snapped, “Do you think they haven’t regretted it all this time? Hell, Odion, you’re being selfish holding a grudge like that! Don’t you think it’s been killing them all this time and you just ran off!” Lani didn’t understand, if he’d never met his parents he would be dying to meet them. If anything he’d want to know why they gave him up, but apparently that wasn’t enough for Odion, Lani narrowed his eyes, did he really want them to suffer? Then he was on a great streak so far.

“Given the choice, I wouldn’t have wanted to be here in the first place,” Odion stammered, his voice shaking between anger and sadness.

“I did this for you,” Lani replied, trying to near the redhead. His hands outstretched as if he wanted to take Odion in his arms, but was unsure if he should.

“What? Break my heart?”

“No! I didn’t think--”

“That’s right Lani, you didn’t think at all.” Odion clutched at his throbbing head, his memories jumping before him and he couldn’t stop them. “Next thing I know, you'll want to call me Sebastian." His voice choked. "I thought you loved me.”

Lani’s face softened somewhat, but he wasn’t going to let this go, not with a caring family right behind them who was trying so hard just to get to know their son, just like he had been trying.

“I do love you. But goddamn it Odion, you really think I would do this to hurt you?”

Odion held back his tears, giving Lani a cold hard stare. “Seems that way, doesn’t it?”

Hurt was written across Lani’s eyes, and he crossed his arms over his chest in an attempt to hide his heart again. “How could you say that?”

Odion laughed madly. “You have no idea do you?” The redhead was pacing, and somewhere between the ringing in his mind he wondered if his supposed family could hear him all the way out here. “And even if I did go back and got to know them, I would never fit in. Do you think I want that? Do you think I’d even be who I am right now if they had found me? Is that what you want? They did that to me. We may share the same blood, but we are not family.”

Odion took a deep breath, taking a closer look into Lani’s eyes. “Is that it? You want me to change? To have a little family to make me better, to prove I’m not an outcast?”

Lani didn’t know what to say. Why couldn’t Odion see what Lani saw? He just didn’t seem to see that these people loved him, that Lani loved him and so many people’s lives wouldn’t be half as bright without Odion in them. “I’m not talking about the past Odion. Maybe they deserve a chance!”

Odion couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. “They don’t fucking deserve it! How dare you bring me here, to the scum of the earth who would throw away their child. I’m nothing like them.” Odion turned away and started walking unable to stand still.

“But Odion, you’ve shown me there’s still good in this world. They, your family, want to be a part of your life!” Lani called after him before taking long strides to catch up. “Why won’t you just give them a chance?”

Odion stopped. “Not everyone gets another chance,” Odion said with finality, looking down at Lani.

Lani paused. “What? What are you saying?”

“You don’t get to be a part of my life anymore Lani,” Odion spat, already putting up his walls and hardening his heart. Never before had he been so enraged. “We’re through.”

“Wh--” Lani choked staring at Odion in shock. A moment passed, and all that could be heard was the gentle drum of the rain. Finally, Lani stammered in speech, swaying with the weight of this revelation. “This isn’t about us.”

“This is exactly about us,” Odion said, pointing his finger downward, making a stand. “You can never let me in, and I’m never letting you in again.”

A mix of emotions raced over Lani’s face, everything from disbelief to anger to denial, there was even a moment when Lani looked like he might laugh, but his expression finally dropped like a stone when Odion made no indication he was joking. Lani shook his head. “What… Odion, you… You’re not serious.”

“We’re through,” Odion repeated his voice harsher and his eyes growing darker.

Those gray eyes were as wide as he’d ever seen them and they narrowed to slits as the telekinetic’s power flashed through the area and he felt his heart breaking into a million pieces. This couldn’t be happening, this was a dream, a nightmare.

“Just like that?” Lani snapped, choosing anger for lack of an ability to process anything else, “After all we’ve fucking been through?”

“All that we’ve been through because you won’t let me in and I’m done trying!”

Lani shook his head at the redhead. His power flashed around Odion and Lani’s eyes flashed momentarily. Odion might say it was frightening to watch the storm rage inside Lani, but he didn’t want to care right now. “I was only trying to help!” Lani shouted back and he forced his power down, he had promised to not force Odion to stay. But he couldn’t stop himself from reaching out. “I’m sorry, Odion!”

Odion jerked his hands back and paced out of reach. “You say that but this keeps happening.”

“You’re so selfish!” Lani blurted.

“Me?!”

“Yes you! You have people who love you and you’re running away from them.”

“Who’s selfish?” Odion bit back, “You’ve never told me a damn thing! You’re a fucking liar Lani and you don’t do it to protect others, you do it to protect yourself!”

“Like you’re the poster child of honesty,” Lani retorted. Anger was getting the better of him and he couldn’t force himself to stop. “I wanted to give this to you because you deserve a family that loves you. And you spit on them!” He needed this not to be about them, Odion was angry, but he didn’t have to make this about them.

“The family you keep forgetting threw me out!” Odion shouted back, he was not going to let this get away from the core of the situation, or maybe he was hiding from the core. “They didn’t just spit on me Lani, they ground me into the dust, they didn’t want me!”

“They’re trying Odion, you won’t let them!”

“I don’t want to! They rejected me when I didn’t even have a choice in the matter, and now I’m rejecting them. But you can’t understand that because everything is fucking magical in Lani’s world.” Odion spat rage burning in his eyes and blinding him to the pain that crossed Lani’s face.

“Right, perfect world,” Lani said softly shaking his head the movement of things around him giving a clue to his actual mood. He shook his head. “Fuck you, Odion.”

Odion’s vision was blurred with tears and he struck another nail in the coffin. “I’m done with this. We’re done.”

Lani’s eyes were just as blurry and his heart shattered and he cried out after Odion. “Is this always how it’s going to be? I make a mistake and you wash your hands of me?” When Odion didn’t answer Lani formulated his own, and he hugged himself. “This is exactly your fucking problem! When things get hard you call it quits! You don’t care who you hurt or who gets in the way! I thought you loved me!”

“I thought so too,” Odion replied not looking at Lani. And small cobblestones dropped where they were as Lani processed that information. The entire world wasn’t just upside down, it had been stolen from beneath his very feet.

“That’s it?” Lani asked in desperation. “Fine! Go ahead and leave! I won’t be here!” He waited but Odion wasn’t stopping him. Lani took a step back. “Run away! Run away scared like you always do! Congratulations Odion you’re the better liar! Really fucking fooled me! Why don’t you go find Rhett and have a fucking party!”

“I don’t know who’s more detestable really, you or him.” A surprised look overcame Odion’s face, but he didn’t take back what he said. They were both pretenders and liars, and Odion was tired. Oh, so tired of always having to fight Lani in order to gain any headway.

Lani choked back what Odion assumed was a sob, the redhead immediately regretted what he just said. “Well?” Lani’s eyes turned golden once more. “Go crawling back to him already! Leave! You seem to like your leash.”

Odion rubbed at his face, unable to come back with any kind of retort. What was the point? At least the weather would hide their tears. Behind Lani people were running through the rain, towards them.

“I hate you,” Odion said, clear as day.

--

“You can’t just leave!” Lani hollered, making Odion cringe.

“Watch me.” This wasn’t the first time this conversation had happened, though it hadn’t been with Lani the first time.

“You see this?” Odion asked, rummaging through their hotel room, holding up his round trip ticket back to Pilot Ridge. He didn’t hesitate in ripping it into many halves, letting them fall to the floor silently.

Lani looked like he was about to be sick, his arms crossed over his chest as he held up the wall. Odion really was done this time. He would never get his Catupine back.

That was it? Well, Odion had made it clear. Lani swallowed, Odion hated him. He closed his eyes tightly, not willing to let Odion see how much he was hurting.

Odion’s back was to Lani, his hands shaking as he looked at the wall the ruins of the ticket seeming to float with exaggerated slowness, as if they were protesting the action. What was done was done. Odion gritted his teeth, he refused to be broken hearted about this, but the betrayal stung. It also strengthened his resolve.

Actions spoke louder than words. Usually a man of speech, Odion didn’t have a damn thing to say as he pretended like it didn’t hurt to be packing up right now. It wasn’t like he hadn’t wanted to come to Ireland, but the beauty of his homeland faded into the black as his mind was preoccupied with the present.

In protest, Lani was throwing his things haphazardly into his own suitcase, mildly thrilled that Odion seemed annoyed by the unfolded, unlaundered clothes going into the same pile. He wouldn’t have to be annoyed by him much longer.

Had they really broken up? Odion didn’t know if Lani was going back to America, and he didn’t care. Only a couple of nights ago, Lani and Odion had been completely vulnerable with one another, entirely in love - it was the last time Odion ever planned on being so stupid.

“I thought I was doing the right thing,” Lani said, hoping to still break through to the redhead, though unable to look at him. This was his final try.

“No, oh no no no no no,” Odion said, an accusatory finger pointed in Lani’s direction, “you don’t get to say that now with your puppydog face. Don’t justify yourself to me.” It was like they hadn’t even gotten to know each other better over the last year. Even now, Odion was having a hard time recalling their European excursions - or his mind wouldn’t let him. He refused to be the suicidal maniac like he had once been when Rhett left. It was Lani who had pulled him out of that slump. What now?

Lani looked away, away from the startlingly blue eyes that would haunt him forever. “I’m not going to make you stay.”

“You never had a backbone anyways. Have fun in Boston,” he added in a mock cheerful tone.

Lani closed his eyes, unsure whether to swing or break out in tears. All of his plans, ruined. It was just like Odion to do this too.

“This is yours,” Lani hissed and took one of Odion’s nice shirts that had migrated into his pile and crushed it into a ball with his hands before throwing it. It hit Odion’s head and the redhead did little more than catch it as it fell and shake it out to fold it nicely. Lani was trying very hard to goad Odion into a fight because at least that was something better than silence. But Odion would not succumb. He was already lost in the void of his transdimensional mind.

Packing was hard and seeing the ruins of the plane ticket on the floor made the reality real for Lani and he couldn’t believe that this was happening. This was all his fault, and he was a fool! He was constantly screwing up. His thoughts digressed tearing at his heart like wolves and leaving gaping holes for the weight of the emotions Lani didn’t know how to handle. This was all his fault, he pushed Odion’s away. He’d never thought that Odion would drop him like this. He was such a fool! Lani looked down at his guilt stained hands and clenched them into fists.

Odion had promised never to leave him, Odion had promised him, he had promised! It was happening all over again, Lani had screwed up again and Odion was leaving him behind. Odion had claimed to love him, claimed that he was a better person than he thought. Odion had built Lani’s confidence one brick at a time and one mistake and he was thrown out, Odion tore at his very foundation tearing him apart brick by brick. Odion hated him.

He didn’t want to be packing and all too soon he was holding his last shirt and he threw it into the suitcase. The souvenirs he’d gotten for his family and for Adrianna were wrapped securely within the folds of clothing. He stood for a moment staring at it before he closed and zipped it up.

He looked up out the window at the beautiful Ireland greenery and he found nothing but gray. “I never should have left Adrianna for you,” he said his only concern striking Odion where it would hurt.

“Maybe you should get back together with her,” Odion suggested coldly, “You were always a keeper.”

Lani brought up their past relationships in order to justify the one they had now. It must have been much easier for Lani to talk about his past than afford room for the future. There was no trust between them. Odion had given Lani so many moments of himself, and Lani had given but half. Well, now there would be no more giving.

Lani narrowed his eyes but his walls were up and his heart was desperately dying and it was all Lani could do to protect it. Odion had said it. He hated Lani. Odion felt betrayed and now Lani did too and he didn’t want to expose himself, he didn’t want Odion to know how much pain he was in but he viciously wanted Odion to hurt. Lani was so blindsided he didn’t even know how to handle this information, he hadn’t had enough time to process it and now he was just reacting.

He glared at Odion and his power rose around him like a shell and it built mental walls in the physical world. He forced a smile and grabbed his pack and pulled it over his shoulders. This was over. Odion was right, this was done. Shutting down his emotions Lani’s masks slid on. “You know, you are the single worst thing that’s ever happened to me.” Odion looked up and once Lani had his attention he aimed his daggers and struck. “My life was fine before you and honestly? I’m glad you ended it, I just haven’t had the heart to do it all along,” it was a wonder his heart wasn’t bleeding out his mouth from his lies. “Godspeed to whatever idiot decides to date you, I’d just suggest for them to kill themselves to start, you’re always whining about something. Anyway, I’d say ‘have a nice life’ but I really couldn’t give a fuck.” He laughed and saluted Odion, “Good riddance.”

He was a brilliant actor and he never acted so well as he did then when he backed out the door and slammed it behind him. Lani had slammed the door on not only Odion but everything that he’d had. He held his smile until he was in the cab and when the driver asked what he was in such a good mood about he laughed. Laughter that quickly turned to sobs.

With the telekinetic leaving, Odion could feel their connection severing. He sat on the cold hotel bed, his fists clenched as he willed himself not to cry. He would not mourn the loss of that man, a man he thought had understood him so well… A man who had ended up leaving him alone, as all others had.

Standing suddenly, Odion grabbed the handle of his suitcase, and everything was flying. You are the single worst thing that has ever happened to me. He had no heart now, everything that was good about him was over, and maybe it hadn’t even existed. I’m honestly glad you ended it… I don’t give a fuck. The lamps at either end smashed into the ground, one after the other. Lani was supposed to have been there forever, had his own mind lied to him? Good riddance.

Odion’s hands pulled at his hair, his arms flailing wildly. And he found himself screaming at the top of his lungs. “Well fuck you too! You were my family you sack of shit! You never had my heart! Never!” But no one was listening anymore.

--

Lani pulled his ‘Boston Celtics’ hoodie tighter around him as he curled himself into his seat and watched the pilot test the wings. He’d been barely able to pull it together enough to get out of the cab and the wait for the plane had brought more tears. Odion didn’t want him, he reminded himself frustratedly and tried to force the sorrow out with anger but the keening loss was so strong in his heart it was like he was drowning in it. He couldn’t breathe and he couldn’t feel anything.

“Sir?” The stuartist said gently not touching him but holding out a blanket.

“Th-thank you,” Lani managed and took it without looking.

“Sir, may I?” He waved a hand without a care and she sat in the aisle seat of the row. “Sir, I don’t know what’s happened but we need you to calm down,” she said, glancing from him to the window.
He blinked and realized the pilot wasn’t checking the wings, he was.

“Sorry,” he said withdrawing into himself.

“Here,” she said handing him a cup of tea, “It’s a little something to help you sleep.”

“I hate tea,” Lani told her. She just smiled sympathetically and pushed it into his hands. Well, sleeping sounded better than this wakeful hell, so he forced down the bitter liquid. He almost immediately felt his mind go fuzzy. "He hated flying..." Lani mumbled.

The next time he awoke they were soaring in for a landing in New York.

--

Odion sat on the hotel room floor. It was like a tornado had passed through, and he couldn’t shut his mind off. Everything inside of him had calmed down and he was only now realizing how differently everything could have gone. But was it really his fault? His need to justify his actions trumped his need to go after Lani, to go to the airport and apologize profusely.

So instead, Odion just got up and left. He did what Lani said he was good at, and ran away. At first he was walking through the hotel exit, but that quickly turned into running. He didn’t know where. All he wanted to do was forget, or reconsider that image of himself falling off a cliff.

But maybe, maybe there was a way to forget all of this. It would be as though it never happened...

[Jonathan & Jacob Bishop]

Unfinished Sentence

“Daddies?” Lily called from the backseat. “Can we get ice cream at the park?”

“Of course sweetie,” “Of course sweetie,” John and Jake replied, John from the driver’s seat and Jake from beside Lily’s car seat.

John turned to smile sheepishly at Rain. Glancing in the rear-view mirror, she saw his brother wearing the same expression. The twins found it near impossible to say no to their daughter. And at four years old, she was already learning this. Almost every request for snacks, toys, or “just five more minutes” was directed at her daddies.

“You two are spoiling her horribly,” Rain had told them one evening after Lily had been tucked in and the three adults were cleaning up in the kitchen.

“How can we say no to those gorgeous brown eyes?” Jake had countered.

“We never had much lucky saying no to yours,” John had added, slipping his arm around Rain’s waist. She had shoved him away playfully but hadn’t been able to help but smiling at her husbands.

Just like she couldn’t help but smile at them now.

“You two…you’re so - ”

But she never gotten the chance to finish her sentence. A tractor trailer ran a red light, plowing into the Bishop’s car on the passenger side. The car whipped around before flipping on its side and rolling over. Jake fought against his seat belt to throw protectively throw himself over their daughter. John reached his hand out for Rain’s. She could hear Lily screaming. And then she couldn’t hear anything.

Rain woke up on a hospital bed. A nurse, who had been standing near her, let out a noise of surprise before dashing off. She returned with a tall man in a lab coat.

“Mrs. Bishop, you’re in the hospital. You’ve been in an accident, but you’re going to be okay,” he said, standing at the foot of her bed.

“My daughter,” Rain croaked. Her voice was filled with pain, both from the soreness in her right side and the horror of what the answer might be.

“She’s fine. Just fine. She has some minor lacerations and needed a few stitches but she’s just fine. Is there someone we could call to come get her?”

Rain’s head was swimming. There was something in the doctor’s eyes that made her stomach cringe. Something that kept her from asking her next question.

“Your husband…” he started, flipping through his notes.

“John…” Rain told him. Though she considered both of them the brothers her husband. John was legally. Just like while Jake was legally listed at Lily’s father, both were her daddy.

“Your husband pulled you and your daughter away from the car. He suffered some second degree burns. The car was on fire. But…” The doctor consulted his notes again. “Jake was trapped inside. They were unable to free him.”

“No…no…no,” Rain started repeating to herself. She didn’t need the doctor to go on. She didn’t want him to, but he did anyway.

“We tried everything, used all of our capabilities, but one gestalt cannot survive alone…”

The doctor went on to explain her injuries, but Rain had stopped listening. She remembered the moment just before the wreck. She had been about to tell the brothers how horrible they were. How they would have to learn to tell Lily no eventually.

And now she just wished she could tell them something else.

“You two,” she whispered to herself and to them, hoping they could hear. “You’re so…” But she still couldn’t finish the sentence. She didn’t know a word that would mean enough.

[Lucy Serrano-Blaise]

Open Your Eyes
Words: 978

It was sudden, they said. How it happened. The details of her wife’s sudden death had washed over Penelope Blaise in an unheard wave. There was little to be heard past the fact that she was gone. Apparently, her eyes had widened at the news. Her eyebrows furrowed. Her lips pressed into a hard line before they parted.

“Sorry, what?”

Of all the things her eldest son Lincoln tried to remind her of, that moment was fleeting. He couldn’t describe the way his mother changed. Nor could he explain just how she took the news. Disbelief didn’t cover it. Sorry, she’d said. And then she’d asked what. As if another explanation would offer some kind of comfort.

A psychometrist himself - and a Hammel graduate at that - he felt the overwhelming sting of the memory. Over and over again. The way his brother Ellis stormed off. The way Penny had let him. And even the way he himself had held onto the older psychometrist for much needed guidance. Guidance she couldn’t give.

Psychometry. Memories imprinted on belongings. On walls. On clothes. On everything. The power held them, and what she used to hate, she grew to hold dear.

And there was the difficulty. Lucy Serrano was everywhere. In every inch of the home they owned. In the eyes of either son they had. In the grin Ellis rarely wore now. In the ink marked on Lincoln’s skin.

On her own hands. Her own tattoo. Her rings.

Penelope Blaise couldn’t imagine having to give anything up. She couldn’t comprehend the thought of getting rid of the myriad of paint-stained flannel shirts still hanging in their colour coded way in the closet. She couldn’t sleep; any contact with the bed brought a steady rush of imprinted memories. The ink manipulator’s hands across her form, drawing her in. The way she’d gently track her lips across the psychometrist’s neck.

Falling into a memory was so simple when it was all she thought of. The coffee cup Lucy broke and glued back together provided a jolt whenever she ran her fingers across the broken lines. When she trailed her hand along the perfect lines of the galaxy painted on the wall, she recalled the day she’d asked for it to be done. She remembered the way the stars would shift when she walked by. The way the coloured intertwined when she’d pause to glance at it. Now, it didn’t move. And she was acutely aware of that.

But memories, aided by powers or no, faded with time. When they followed suit, she started to search for them. Her hands ran the surface of the kitchen counter, looking for the spot where the Australian used to sit and watch her while she cooked dinner. A pause. The way Lucy's laugh caught Penny’s attention, causing her to shift and look over. There she was, smiling. Or grinning.

Was she smiling or grinning?

The questions continued to surface, as Penny would stare at nothing in the presence of her boys. They’d heard all the stories from so many different mouths. Hers. Theirs. Sawyer’s. Despite how Lucy had tried to express that memories and the way they both received them wasn’t something of a curse, here she was. Stuck with them only to have them ripped away from her again.

Were it not for Lincoln.

“Try again.” She said, as he settled again to sit across from her. As he always did.

“I wasn’t there, mom.” Lincoln explained, his nose crinkling involuntarily at the difficulty. “I only know what I know from the way you used to tell it.”

“For you, that’s usually enough.” Penny explained. After all, Lincoln’s heightened ability meant he didn’t require direct contact. Nor did he need a direct memory. “Once more. Please.”

With a sigh, Lincoln reached out towards her. He settled his hands within her own.

“You’re not okay.” There was Lucy, pulling her arms through a shirt and dropping her hands to fiddle with the buttons. “Why are you not okay?”

“You’re not okay, either.” Penny had offered the words with clear enough intention. Her eyes were searching – not quite scrutinising – as she waited for a reaction. For some recognition. She reached forward to pull at the hem of the ink manipulator’s shirt; “Not like this.”

“I’m not gonna run out on you. I was just about to put that on.” Behind her, Lucy indicated towards a white dress. One that didn’t seem to suit her. One she didn’t seem happy about. The irritation behind it collided with the confused harsh quality of her tone, “Until you showed up.”

It was the day they got married. The day they ran out on the wedding and eloped instead.

“This isn’t right.” Penny relentlessly volleyed, reaching forward to fun her fingertips across Lucy’s jaw. “Not like this.”

With a small tug of her hand, Penny tried to give Lucy encouragement to move towards the door. The Australian seemed hesitant, but the recognition in her eyes finally hit before she made a move to-

Slowly, he allowed his hands to slip through hers. Despite the difficulty, Lincoln kept his focus steady on his mother’s gaze; the way the briefest signs of light coloured her darkened eyes instantly. His attention turned down to his hands when she reached forward again, gripping his with such clear intention.

“I-” A pause. A break in his voice as he tried his best to fight through the inevitable decent; “What happens next? I really honestly can’t remember.” He pointed out, his eyebrows furrowing as he glanced up. Life returned to her eyes, but it was clouded with confusion, speckled with frustration.

It was the day they got married. It was that day.

Slowly, her lips moved from the hardened line they held to part. Her eyebrows furrowed.

She squeezed his hands. She took a breath.

“I can’t either.”

[Carter Chevalier]

Make It Without You
Words: 1029

Distance was strange. Distance was unusual. When Carter Chevalier was distant, it always meant something. He’d never been distant with Rya without reason. There was clearly a very particular reason, but for once she had no idea. And she didn’t know how to handle that.

She knew when his classes were supposed to finish. And she knew he was two hours late getting back home. It’d taken him a year to ask her to live with him, and it’d taken her another year to finally accept it.

When she heard the door close, she turned her head to glance at him. Without getting a glimpse, she heard the way he seemed to toss something heavy aside. His books, she guessed. Either he had a difficult day of classes or he was having a difficult day full stop. Immediately she guessed it had to do with his mother. He never reconnected with her, and she couldn’t blame him for it. She liked to appear from time to time and step in the way. But this had been going on for days.

Taking steps into the kitchen, the older Chevalier checked his phone without glancing at her and immediately moved to pour himself a drink. Something harsh. Darkened liquid in a glass settled by his phone. He was still checking it.

“Hey.” She tried, though she knew the answer she was going to get.

A grunt. A sound from his mouth, passed the harsh line of his lips. Rya rolled her eyes. But she was never one to let him act the way he was without explanation. So she took the necessary steps towards her, and finally he turned his bright eyes towards her.

Carter raised his hands, running them along either side of his head a little too roughly. The movement usually provided some kind of comfort, because he was checking his hair despite knowing it was perfect. But he offered too much pressure, and strands fell from their perfect hold. Her eyebrows knit together, and she almost immediately reached out to fix it for him. Rya knew how a strand out of place irked him. Truthfully, she knew what all his movements meant. But all this felt different.

Because he jerked away from her the moment he felt her fingers brush his skin. Carter searched the line of his hair again on his own, brushing it into place. The movement irked Rya. Rightly so.

“Don’t.” He fought.

“Don’t what?” She asked him.

“Just,” Carter began, but the words seemed to fail him, “Stop.”

“Just stop?” She repeated, her irritation growing clear. Again, it was impossible for Rya to leave it as it was. Why would she? When they didn’t talk, things got worse and she knew that. He knew it, too. “What does that even mean? I’m not doing anything.”

“This.”

“This what?” She pressed on, watching the way he raised the glass to his lips and downed the contents in one go. She was immediately jealous; a drink sounded perfect right now, “Come on, Carter. I know you know how to talk better than this.”

Glancing at her again, Carter wore the frustration he felt. For someone who could easily wipe emotions off his face, it was impossible when it came to Rya. She knew him too well. And that was terrifying.

“This isn’t my life, Adryana.” He snapped, pressing his palm to his forehead. Anything to try and quell the headache this pressure was already inducing. “This isn’t us.”

“What isn’t us?” She reached forward, her fingers curling around his raised arm in order to physically grab his attention. Anything to get him talking. To get him explaining. The words he’d already offered steadily spiked an overbearing amount of uncertain pressure in her system. She knew he’d try this, she just really hoped he wouldn’t. “Because what, we’re living together now?”

“Yes, because you live with me now!”

“Together, Blondie!” Rya snapped harshly, using the nickname in a completely different way now, “It might’ve been yours at first, but it’s ours now. That’s exactly what you said!” Dropping his jaw, Carter did his best to consider what to say. But nothing passed his lips. He felt his temples start to pulse. His jaw tensed up. “I waited months after you asked me. A whole year. Because I knew you weren’t ready, but you asked and asked and asked me to anyway!”

“Perhaps playing house isn’t everything I fucking thought it would be.” Carter shot back, jolting back to free his arm from her grasp. Or at least try to. But it was difficult; Rya had her own strength about her. And she chose to let go on her own terms.

“This isn’t playing house. Don’t say it like that. This is a relationship. You said so yourself!”

Without a word, the blonde glanced at her again. The jolt he’d given before had tussled his hair, and he looked through fallen locks in her direction. There was more than anger behind his eyes. There was a strain of something new. Something unknown to Rya until that exact moment.

There was guilt.

“What’d you do?” She asked him, her expression steely against his widened eyes. He didn’t answer, so she dropped her tone low; “What is it? Whatever it is, I can handle it.” After all, she knew a relationship with a Chevalier was bound to have its faults; and he was the only one she knew how to forgive.

“Sylvie, she-” He started, but he dropped the rest of his sentence the moment he saw her expression. She didn’t need to hear any more. It was the first real time Carter had seen a deep level of hurt within her eyes.

And it’d be the last.

Rya exhaled on a laugh; short and sarcastic. With a small bounce to her step, she shook her head and turned around, taking her car keys and walking out for good. Had it been anyone else, she knew the concept of forgiveness was achievable. She believed she could give him that much, because she knew the transition would have been difficult – almost impossible – without falt.

But not when it came to her.