Lonely solipist [open]

[Lucas Blacke]

Laughing? What was so funny about it? ''Ya see it as a joke when someone tries to kiss ya?'' Not that he did. Well, he did. But he didn't. He didn't want to, but he did. Did he? He wasn't sure. He hoped she was wearing some caffeine cologne or something, something he could blame this on. She told him it was just a kiss and he'd needed to man up. Man up over what? Kissing another man? ''Not my style to man up 'bout kissin' a dude.'' He told her. Sure, he was telling her right now, but this her was also a him and that was something he shouldn't ever forget again.

''An' trying?'' Really, trying? That was what she went with? ''As if ya moved outta the way or anythin'. I did it an' only stopped 'cause I stopped myself. Somethin' ye could have done easily yerself by movin' yer head to the side or somethin'.'' Maybe she wanted him to, that was always an option. But.. she knew he was straight right? But being with a woman even though the she was a he, the thought wasn't completely offputting to him. Though he started to wonder then.. what was she from the waist down? Did it change when she did? Did she both have an innie and an outtie?

But.. changing while having an orgasm? Did the skin just.. singe shut or something? What if some man was in there and she changed? Would he just lose his appendages or.. what? He wondered for a moment until it occured to him he shouldn't be questioning this. He wouldn't get close, period! ..did she have periods?

''I'm a man, thank ye very much, but I'm still freakin' out 'bout it. I mean, I know yer a guy an' all, but the female you looks so..'' He shrugged continuously and tried to think of a suiting word.

''Hot.''

[Deleted]

Laughing, yes, why not!? It was definitely funny, especially considering she was pretty sure Lucas was as straight as a doornail, so….poor guy, he really must be confused, up against a person like Marcus. Marcus, born a boy, but is a girl sometimes, but will always insist that she is, first and foremost, a boy. Of course it was funny! As long as he wasn’t pissed at her, or hating her because of her twisted gender identity, then she could find as much amusement as she wanted in how he tried to process it. It was….silly, actually. And a bit refreshing to see someone acting so awkward. Her other guy friends were never like that, always making cheap shots at him/her until she screamed at them.

Marcus tilted her head, letting her long blonde hair fall over her shoulder. “Yeah, sure, instead you flail about like your nuts just fell off.” It really wasn’t that big of a deal. Lips were lips, no matter who they belonged to, though she supposed you’d rather them be the lips of someone you liked. That didn’t mean that she considered Lucas as dating material for herself, but Marcus had been a bit desensitized to wanton intimacy. Experimentation tended to do that to you. “Uh-huh….do I need to remind you, because I’m pretty sure I told you once before, you’re the only one of us who has a problem with it.” Yes, Marcus’ lips were pretty loose, though that didn’t mean she was out kissing every pair of them she saw. It was too much effort to freak out about every single accidental kiss that almost(and actually didn’t) happen. And while that didn’t mean that she would kiss Lucas, it didn’t mean that she minded it either.

Like mother, like son, huh? he thought for a moment, though the thought sickened him. It was (unfortunately) true though.

Marcus shook that thought from her mind. She didn’t need to be getting depressed all over again.

Though….yes, Lucas freaking out like this was amusing, so she figured she should just milk it for all it was worth. But then he said….that….and her smile disappeared. Marcus stared at him with saucers for eyes. W…what did he say she….? The kiss hadn’t done anything, but somehow, just a simple compliment(if it could be called that) like that had her pale face suddenly turn a flaming shade of red. “N…..what the hell are you talking about!?” she shouted in her embarrassment. “Have you even actually looked at me?? Skinny as a twig, no hips, no boobs and you think…!” He must have some really low standards when it came to women, to think that someone like Marcus was---! She was built like a boy! Too tall! No muscle! No fat! Just a scrawny, pale-faced chick with knatty-string hair! “You…..you must really be desperate,” she concluded. Marcus leaned in slightly in concern. “How long has it been since you last had sex?” she asked. But then it hit her and she brought her hand to her mouth in pity. “Ohh….are you a virgin? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make assumptions.” That was so cute~! Poor guy.

[Lucas Blacke]

And so the time of cheering up had passed and Lucas' confusion was slowly turning into anger. Whatever things she had to say about that moment only annoyed him, nothing even remotely helping him cope. ''Problems? Me? 'Course I have problems! Yer a fuckin' guy! An' for the record, ya hit me before, so excuuuuse me for bein' careful miss dick.'' She'd taken him out of his awkward mode though, but right back into his yelling mode and he wasn't quite sure if she would appreciate that. Not that he cared or anything. Honestly, she could go die in a fire right now.

Then when she took on the assumption that he was a virgin and kind of mocking him for it, while it wasn't even true, left him speechless for a second. Last time anyone had done that to him was when he was to find out his uncle died on his own since his parents 'forgot' to tell him. Such a dick move, and now she was doing the same, only without a dead uncle and with added childish behaviour.

When she listed all the things about her that Lucas assumed she found ugly he would shake his head and say it wasn't true, that she looked pretty as she was. But that time quickly passed, he now thought of those things as true, he looked at her and stepped back with a single raised eyebrow. To ask those things of him though.. she was basically asking for an angry Luke.

''Y'know?'' He said, trying to get her attention.

''Fuck you.''

[Deleted]

‘Miss dick?’ Of course, he’d been sweet just 20 seconds ago and now he was back to name calling. What was with this bipolar jerk? Did he even realize how up and down he was being? That was probably more frustrating for people to deal with than anything. It was hard to predict his reactions and apparently the slightest touch on something sore made him go ballistic. “I told you not to call me shit like that!” she countered. “And besides, why is it my responsibility to make sure you keep yourself under control? If you have a problem kissing guys, then maybe I should just keep looking like a guy so your delicate, confused brain can keep it straight.” Marcus was upset, but not because of anything he said. Marcus was upset because Luke was taking a lighthearted joke and turning it into a personal attack. And that wasn’t Marcus’ intention at all

He no doubt did it again with that ‘virgin’ comment. Marcus didn’t mean anything by it, she was just playing around. But when those two words came from his mouth, Marcus stopped laughing. “What?” she asked defensively. “You’re allowed to call me dick-girl and Marca, but I can’t call you a virgin? You are a sensitive one, aren't you?” Did that mean she wasn't allowed to play around with him ever for fear that she might step on a land mine? She sighed with a small grunt. Marcus crossed her arms across her chest and combed her hair behind her ear. “Double standards aren’t that sexy, you know?” How was she supposed to know how to interact with him if she didn't know what was going to set him off? "But if you're going to cry about being a virgin, then I'm sorry," she said grudgingly. And maybe with a hint of sarcasm.

[Lucas Blacke]

A bold chuckle came from him. He'd gotten her to be angry with him. Score, really, hadn't he just told her he wanted people not to like him? Well, he didn't want them to but he certainly wouldn't blame them, and getting people mad at him was a great way of getting himself disliked. Plus it allowed him to blow off some steam himself.

The way she was doing, no matter if she was a girl right now gave Luke the right amount of mad to just speak his mind even if it didn't make any sense at all. Maybe the comment she made about needing to look like a guy instead was a jolt to his mind that he didn't need to hold back, she wasn't really a girl and no matter how he thought about it, that wouldn't change. ''I'm not callin' ya shit, dick for brains! I called ya miss dick!'' Interpreting jokes or sarcasm or whatever, not a part of the plan right now.

'''Course I'm allowed ta call ye a dick girl! 'S 'cos yer callin' me somethin' I ain't an' I am callin' ya somethin' ya are!'' If that was something she couldn't comprehend.. well fuck her. Or.. was it him now? Yeah, Luke was being mad, it was him. ''Why the fuck should I care 'bout yer definition of sexy? So I made a mistake tryin' to kiss ya an' befriend ya, but I ain't the one spoutin' half truths!'' His mind was partially going back to the shapeshifting thing she..he neglected to tell him about and it was pretty much just adding fuel to the fire.

''Granted the fuckin' fact yer only half a person. But at least ya ain't a fuckin' virgin, right?''

[Deleted]

God, this guy was irritating! He just….it’s like he just liked conflict! He liked to argue for the sake of arguing. It was exasperating and Marcus wasn’t sure she liked doing this. No, she was sure she didn’t like it. Especially since nothing he was arguing made a lick of sense! “Oh, my god, you did not just say that! You sound like a fucking five year old!” Marcus put her hand to her head in her frustration. Lucas was going to give her a migraine at this rate.

“I’m a boy!” she shouted back at him. “Or haven’t you figured that one out yet? I’m not a girl, I’m a boy, and I don’t like being called ‘dick-girl’!” Seriously, how immature could he get? And now he goes back to a subject she thought they’d already settled. He really knew how to hold a grudge, didn’t he?

Marcus breathed. And then again. Her chest kept heaving up and down as she struggled to not get worked up all over again. Lucas…he really knew how to get you right where it hurt. And that hurt. “……..that’s it, I’m done,” she said after a long pause. She started back doing what she was trying to do before; getting her things packed up. “We already fought about that. I already apologized more times than someone should. I tell you I don’t like something, and you do it anyway, and then you try to tell me that you’re the one who’s being generous for trying to ‘kiss me and be my friend’….like it’s some sort of honor.” Did he have any idea how messed up that was? “I’m done with this,” she said again as she put her guitar back in it’s case.