Awkward moments [Jayson]

[Jen Mitchellson]

Jen entered the place hurriedly, trying to ignore Jayson as she walked up to a table with whatever confidence she had left. Leave it to a robotic jerk like him to make her feel so inadequate and dumb when she usually was confident about herself. But he'd already made her feel shallow, stupid and nosy, so of course she was upset. The walk there hadn't helped sooth her anger, only fuelled by her thoughts of strangling him, though she was pretty sure he could end up enjoying that, so new tactic.

She chose the table, just to display some dominance, though she was fully aware how childish she was being, crossed her arms and legs and waited in silence for the waitress to approach, not even caring if Jayson sat across her. He still had her stuff, her bag with her messy clothes inside, and she smiled, biting on her lower lip. She wasn't sure how she felt about that. No one had ever carried her bag for her before, nor she thought it was necessary. She wasn't a weak little girl after all, no matter her appearance. Well, okay, she sort of was considering the downsides of her powers, but she could at least carry a bag full of clothes. 

Jen looked away from him, shaking her head and still smiling. What was she doing here, anyway? Her stomach decided to complain again and she placed a hand on it, rolling her eyes at herself. Oh yeah. THAT. Not like it hadn't been embarrassing enough back at the store. 

"So." Said Jen, now unsure of what to talk with him, so of course she decided to be hostile, "Any other subjects I'm not allowed to mention to you?" 

[Jayson Kline]

She walked into a place he hadn't seen before and took a seat at the table she chose. Not speaking the entire way over and doing this? Yeah, she was angry. He laughed mentally, as if that hadn't been made obvious by what she said to him, even when telling him it was nothing but a joke. He knew better, oh how he knew better. Though he still interpreted it as an insult.. why? Well, if he let small insults like that slide, even if just meant as a joke, wouldn't that open the way for more harsh insults? Better to prevent that from happening at all.

Apologizing? He knew she had been joking and she took it back, and he wouldn't be quite that insulted even if she did mean it, but it was the mere idea of letting people walk all over him. So what if people called him a robot? Didn't mean he lacked emotions, emotions that people steppped on without knowing they did so. He never showed it, this was why people didn't seem to care and liked him much more because of it.

''Not allowed to mention?'' He questioned. Obviously she felt that she wasn't allowed to call him a dork. Well, she was wrong. She was, he'd just walk if she did. ''I'm not forbidding you from doing anything, I'm just telling you what will happen if you insult me.'' Too long had he taken insults from worse people without so much as a single complaint, but this was different because she was the sister of one of his closest friends.

Letting the bag slide off his shoulder he put it down beside him, knowing that keeping her stuff close was pretty much the only thing keeping her there. He sighed as the waitress came along to take their orders. Jay sent her a smile and gave his order, his gaze then turning to Jen as she made hers, the waitress noting it and turning around with a polite nod.

''What's wrong?''

[Jen Mitchellson]

Jen stared at him in confusion. Insult him? "What are you talking about?" She asked, wondering exactly when she'd insulted him. "Are you still on about that dork thing?" She snorted, smiling sideways in amusement. So he thought all of this was because of that? How wrong was he. She shook her head, letting out a breathy laugh, unwrapping her arms from her previous position and leaned over the table, smirking at him. Even if he said he had emotions, he showed none in his expression. Jayson was truly a mystery to her, something she'd never encountered before. She thought everyone had and was a type. She? Well, she liked to think she was a tad deeper than that, everyone was, but that didn't mean people didn't fit in a category. Jayson though... She'd never met his category before. Tall, quiet and broody seemed like a tad too simplistic for him, since that type of men usually hid another self. Not Jayson, it seemed. Plus he was vain, or at least she figured that out of the way he'd blown out of proportion her comment on him being a dork.

The waitress came and she stared at him as he ordered, resting her chin on one hand, supporting her head. How easy it was for him to smile at the waitress, yet Jen hadn't seen many smiles in the short time she'd been with him. Oh it was her turn. "I'll have... fruit salad, the breakfast menu number one WITH extra bacon and...a glass of orange juice. A big one." She sent him a proud smile as the waitress left.

He asked the million dollar question and she smiled at him, staring thoughtfully for a moment. "Something's wrong?" she asked back innocently, before letting out a sigh. Okay. If he wanted her to say it. "Why won't you let me ask about Rayne?" She asked, her eyes narrowing. "Is it that painful for you? To... remember her?" Was he in love with the girl. A tattoed, black wearing, skinny girl. Gosh, it was like she was made for him. Jen was still smiling pleasantly, leaning over the table and staring deeply, trying to read his expression. It was difficult. Why was it so difficult? How could anyone be so... stoic?

[Jayson Kline]

How often had he seen girls eating salads? Enough to think they only ate those things. Not her though, or Rayne or Kat, those two had no qualms downing an entire pizza between the two of them. Girls with an appatite, he supposed. What Jen ordered though, magnificent, somehow it even reminded him of Rayne, though she was only really on his mind right now because she mentioned the girl so much. Seriously, what the hell was up with that? He had no idea, his mind told him she was jealous though she said she was curious, and his heart told him she was trying to find out what he liked and loved so she could do it to win his heart even if he said he didn't care for it, and his brain simply tried not to care. Boy was it hard to ignore a beautiful girl like her.

''I'm paying.'' He responded as he slightly tilted his head in confusion. ''So why didn't you pick something more expensive? Jealous people do that, right?'' He thought they did, the people at school who didn't like him would take advantage of him like that. Maybe she didn't because she didn't dislike him.. who knew?

Time for him to clean up his mind though, and so he dumped most of what she said which didn't matter and most of what he said that didn't matter, including her comment about dorks, and smiled at her as she leaned over the table. ''Why should it be painful?'' He asked stoically. The memory was there, and fun, but nothing more than a memory in the end. ''We had a good thing, and what that was aside, it was a good thing.'' He seriously didn't know what they had. A good friendship? A casual relationship? ''And good things shouldn't hurt to think about.''

''You're free to ask, really. It's just a little queer that you would want to know so much about someone who is gone.''

[Jen Mitchellson]

Jen raised an eyebrow at his question. "Jealous?" She repeated with a smirk, "You really think the worst of me, don't you?" She snorted and looked away for a moment as she thought of what to answer. "I'm not here to take advantage of you, Jayson." It bugged her that he would think that, especially when she'd gone through the trouble of looking nice for him. "But if you're feeling generous I can take some food to go, if that makes me fit better into your idea of what I am." It didn't help her mood. In fact, it was kind of annoying that someone, especially a guy, would think that poorly of her, and make her feel bad about herself. She hadn't felt this depressed going out with a hot guy since- She'd never felt this way. Period. And it was as if he was trying to get her angry.

The way he talked about his time with Rayne made her look at him again, staring with a small smile. Rayne was really lucky if she had someone who remembered their time together so fondly. Jen figured there was no one who cared for her as much as Jay seemed to care for this disappearing girl. But she still didn't understand it. Why didn't he hate her then?

"You didn't even kiss." She said before she could stop the words, remembering what he'd said about his relationship with Rayne, and her eyes widened as she realised how cruel it must've sounded. "I'm sorry. It's none of my business." And he seemed to agree. She just shrugged, still annoyed at the fact that he seemed to think she was jealous. She wasn't! Okay, a little, but not for the wrong reasons. Was it so hard to ask for someone to care for her as much? "Queer." She repeated, raising an eyebrow and smirking, "Please, I have enough dealing with queer in my head thinking of Caelum." Ha, play of words, just like he'd done before. She sighed though, looking down at the table for a moment, not being strong enough to hold his gaze. "Well, I'm curious. When you speak of her you seem distant, as if remembering her. I think-" She shrugged, as if it wasn't a big deal, "Must feel good. To care for someone like that. That's all."

He'd said she could ask, right? Alright... well..

"Have you had a relationship since?" She wondered, mostly thinking of Caelum. Jayson was sort of in the same situation, right? Only less gay and more tattoos. They both had lost someone they loved and it made her wonder, maybe if Jayson had managed to move on, so would Caelum.

[Jayson Kline]

He listened to her talk about the food and how she wasn't there to take advantage of him.. she wasn't? She seemed to want to, it was what jealous people did and he would stick to his thought of Jen being jealous, even if she said she wasn't. She even offered to do something like it if he was just going to pay for it. He shook his head. ''I am not going to pay to make you fit whatever image I may or may not have of you.'' He said. ''I'm not trying to make you fit anything, I'm just stating facts. The way I see things. Not my fault if you can't handle it.'' Okay so that last part could have been a bit snarky. Wait, were they having a fight? It began feeling like one.. and who started it? Awesome.

Why was she being so.. insistent? Everything he said required a defense, it seemed. She was doing a great job at it, even getting the 'robot' to feel awkward when she talked. Good things always happened when you felt awkward when someone talked, but being a good robot enabled him to keep everything inside and still react perfectly normal to anything she had to say. Which was once again, about Rayne.

He nodded when she suddenly said they didn't kiss, instantly taking back those words and apologizing. ''It isn't. But that never kept you before.'' He told her. ''We never kissed, Rayne and I. It never came that far.'' He wondered if he still knew how to do it, he hadn't been with anyone in a long time. And the only one who came close had moved to Russia. His luck. The best. Still he didn't miss her, just remembered the good times and cherished them.''Caring is a good thing,'' A nod and a smile were sent her way as if assuring her she had nothing to worry about, not with him anyway.

''People call me distant about everything, Jen. I care about her still, it's just better to enjoy the memory than it is to try and make new ones.'' Truth was, he did still care and kind of miss her, but that wasn't something he needed to burden other people with. ''I also care about you, for instance.''

He shook his head then as she asked if he'd been in a relationship since. ''I have not. Flattered you would call what Rayne and I had a relationship though.''

[Jen Mitchellson]

Jen resisted the urge to roll her eyes. He really had no qualms in speaking his mind no matter if he hurt her feelings, right? A lot like her in a sense, but not exactly. Jen knew who to be nice to, and he, well, maybe he saw no need to be gentle to her, even if she was, after all, a girl. She wasn't used to men being this rude and harsh on her. "What's your problem?" She asked suddenly, actually feeling offended. She wasn't used not to be liked by people! Okay, men. "Are you gay or something?" She knew he wasn't, but it was still so freaky to her that he'd act this way. "What do you have against me?" And what was she doing here anyway? She eyed her bag and wondered if she could manage to reach it with her powers without him noticing, so she could just get out of there. No meal was worth the abuse.

She let out a frustrated huff of air through her nostrils, trying to calm down, as he called her nosy. Or implied it. So fine, she was! But it was still rude to point it out like that. She kept the pout as he talked about Rayne, distracted by the way he made her feel. He truly managed to make her feel uncomfortable and just plainly hate herself. She still listened though, arms crossed and glare in place. He still smiled her way and she rose an eyebrow. What? What was he talking about? Caring?

Jen untangled her arms as she stared at him. He... cared about her? But- "But you're so harsh to me." She said in confusion. He was really something else. She still stared at him, unable to figure him out. What was his deal, anyway? How could he easily admit caring about someone and yet other things were difficult to grasp? It confused her and actually, made her feel pretty dumb.

A blush spread across her cheek when he mentioned her saying he'd been in a relationship. "There's lots of types of relationship." She answered back in defence. "Besides, it's the feeling that counts, right? Not the- uh... how close you got." Wait, if he hadn't had a relationship since, then... Her face broke into a smirk, "You mean, in all this time, you've never..." She waved a hand as she trailed off, waiting for him to get what she'd said. Oh, that was plain sad.

[Jayson Kline]

How he wished he knew when he said something wrong. He knew he could be distant at times but.. what did he say to warrant what Jen said to him? ''My problem..? I don't have a problem?'' He questioned in full blown confusion. Next thing she asked him was if he was gay which he knew she already was aware of that he wasn't. So why did she ask that? Was it something he said? If so, what? ''Gay..?'' She'd done it, reduced him to be unable to do anything but ask questions. He had never been above asking questions in a social setting, but this was beginning to get a bit scary. ''Against you? Why would I-?'' He had no idea. ''What do you mean?''

He coughed. ''Anyway, you should explain yourself a bit more clearly. How am I coomingg across as having anything against you?'' He wondered as he looked her over. Were he someone else he would have known just by looking at her that she had no reason to be this insecure about anything, if that was what it was. That other guy.. the one she spoke of the night before, he'd bedded her right? So what was the issue? She probably had guys lining up.

''Harsh? Distant okay, but harsh is a new one.'' He shook his head at her, his facing losing the smile that adorned it. He did care about her despite the fact she called him a dork, despite her calling him harsh and gay, implying he had a problem and all. It hurt a bit, sure, but he did care about her. It would just take time to get her to see that.

He nodded then instead of shaking. ''That's why I said what I did.'' He did count just the feelings. He knew there was something there, they just never came around to it. But she loved him, and he loved her. The feeling counted. He sighed lightly. ''All that time I've never fucked.'' He nodded, only slightly lowering his volume so no one else would hear it. ''Four years since my last time.''

''That is what you implied, yes?''

[Jen Mitchellson]

Jen glared, biting on her lower lip as he answered. Not a problem? "Really, dude? You keep attacking me." Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration, but it wasn't all that far from what she felt. "You keep calling me jealous, that I should take advantage or something. I'm not-" She blushed, "I don't do those things anymore." Anymore. She'd said more than she should had. Hopefully he wouldn't ask about it. So far he hadn't asked her many personal questions, it'd just been her prodding him from information, like she usually did when she was interested in someone, so maybe he wouldn't notice.

Explain herself. Right. She rubbed her temples with her hands, closing her eyes. He was really completely useless when it came to other people wasn't he? "Look, when you say negative things about a person you just met, means you're a bit judgmental and nobody likes that. You have no right to judge what I am, if I'm good or not, if I'm jealous or petty or take advantage. It's none of your business. We're not-" She stopped, because they kind of were friends, right? So she took a deep breath and looked down. "You don't know me. Just like you said, if you don't fit a stereotype then neither do I."

"Well, aren't you?" She asked, still wondering why he was treating her like that. "Are you like this with Caelum? Or were you with Rayne?" No wonder she left, she added inwardly, but knew that would be too harsh to say out loud. Maybe he just didn't notice his words had an impact on others.

He answered to her so honestly about his lack of sex and her eyes widened. "Wow- I-" The waitress came back. Talk about an awkward moment. She set down their food and Jen smiled at her awkwardly, nodding along and muttering a "Thanks." And silence followed. Jen turned to Jayson once again, still surprised. "Yeah. That's- what I was asking, yup." She poked her food with a fork and sighed, turning up at him again in wonder.

"Why?" She asked curiously, "You're- well, you must know, right? You KNOW you're hot. You could have any girl you wanted. Get in and get out. Lose some steam, all that jazz." She hadn't lowered her voice like he had for this conversation and she did get some glares from a nearby table, but she ignored them. "You could be having sex like RIGHT now." Wait- reel it in, "Not with me, of course." Harsh, "I mean, maybe. I don't know. Not saying I wouldn't." Digging the hole deeper, Jen. She rolled her eyes at herself. "What I mean is, if you were a tad... nicer to girls, maybe you could just get some action." She sent him a smile, "Just a thought."

[Jayson Kline]

When did he attack her? Obviously she meant verbally, he hoped, but still. If what he was saying was seen as attacking he kind of attacked everyone.. but.. his roommates never had that problem? So why did she? Maybe it was the lack of time spent with him, he wasn't quite at ease enough to joke with her, and he clearly remembered joking with Rayne and the rest of the bunch. He was positive right then that she needed to grant him time, he had alredy been changing his way of speaking way sooner than planned, so there was plenty of potential there. But nooo, he was attacking her, at least she didn't up and leave. That'd sting.

Anymore. ''Ah, so you're insecure.'' He answered suddenly, the pieces falling into place for him. ''This is new for you,'' He nodded. ''I can see why my honesty upsets you then.'' If she was one of those girls who claimed to be a changed woman then she was probably not changed.. shame, just when Jay was thinking about giving in to his feelings. He did peg her for a one night stand type of thing, sadly enough not his type. ''Friendship it is.'' He muttered under his breath the moment realization hit.

''We're not?'' She stopped before adding the word friends, but he knew she wanted to. It hurt a bit, to think they weren't friends. He'd really done something wrong. And now he did wish Rayne was there. For the first time in a while, he wished that someone who was gone, was there. ''Obviously I don't know you then.'' Not like he though at least. ''Thought I did.'' And if what they were doing didn't help, what hope was there? Though it wasn't like she didn''t tell him enough, they just happened to be things that he couldn't work with.

The food came and Jayson nodded at the waitress. Being a proverbial robot and all didn't mean he couldn't feel the awkward radiating from the situation, also from Jen, really. ''Why the surprise?'' It was clear on her face and not well hidden in her eyes. ''Did you think me to use fornicated or something? Sexual intercourse? I'm not that ancient.''

''It's not about having sex, Jen. You said so yourself.'' He told her as she stumbled over her words about wanting, or not wanting to sleep with him. ''Even if you offered I would say no.'' He replied. ''You seem like the one night stand type of girl, and I don't want that.'' Her wondered, was Cales like that? Maybe he should ask him.. He never really showed any interest in his love life. ''No Jen, I want a relationship. Not some cheap fuck.''

''And I don't have to be nicer, if people like me, they like me. If they don't.. Well, weeding out the weak, I suppose.''

[Jen Mitchellson]

Wait, what? Jen let out a laugh, smiling in disbelief. "Insecure? Me?" Pff, right. "I'm sorry, are you blind or something? Can't you see me?" She knew she was hot! Why would she be even the slightest bit insecure about anything? Okay, so maybe she'd screwed up a couple of times before and Luke's call had left her feeling the tiniest bit... insecure. Crap. Was he right? Was she insecure? "Shut up." She said with a pout, now angry that he seemed to know her better than she knew herself. And just for spending one day together. Wow, he was good. She wouldn't admit this out loud though. "This isn't being honest, Jayson. This is downright shooting in the dark." It wasn't. He was hitting all the sore spots pretty accurately, but she wasn't about to admit that.

We're not? He'd said and she let out a breath. He caught that, eh? Jen rolled her eyes, now feeling bad about it. "We could be." She said with a shrug, "If you'd stop pissing me off." She felt her chest tightened. Did he know her? Maybe she just didn't know herself. She just wasn't sure what she was supposed to be anymore. Not since a long time ago. Not since Julien had called her interesting and funny and told her there was more to her than big breasts. And then of course that pesky call the night before. Maybe that was it. She was still feeling emotional about it.

"There's this little thing called empathy." She explained, "And I just went through some stuff last night. Stuff that I didn't deserve." She thought so at least, "And you calling me jealous or expecting me to take advantage or insecure... It just- It makes last night's call real. And I'd like to think it isn't. That I'm not just-" She sighed, gathering courage to finish her sentence. "Trash." She leaned over the table, suddenly feeling weak. "Friends don't kick their friends when they're down."

Once their food arrived, she started eating it, obviously feeling famished and looked up at him as he took the same stance Caelum did. Why did people put so much weight on relationships anyway? "I'd rather be alone." She muttered once she gulped down her food. He called her a one night stand girl and she snorted, not answering. "Way to hit where it hurts..." She added in a low voice, sending him a glare. She'd JUST gotten a call from a one night stand calling her a mistake and Jayson HAD to go there? She threw her fork on her plate and moved to take a gulp of juice, angrily slurping at the straw as she glared at him. Cheap fuck. There he went again. Oh, how she hoped she could just throw the juice at his face and walk away. But this was Caelum's friend. Why, she didn't know.

"Well, I don't like you." She said, placing the glass down with a slam. "Call me weak!" She spread her arms out as she spoke, smiling bitterly, actually furious at him. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been this angry. Maybe last night. And here he was, throwing salt at ALL her wounds. Asshole.

"No wonder Rayne left. She probably couldn't wait to get away from you." She added in a low voice, turning down to poke at her breakfast, suddenly not feeling hungry anymore. She hadn't meant that. She knew Rayne would just be the opposite of herself. All she wanted to do was hurt him as much as he'd hurt her. Have some payback. But it was so hard. Because everyone was so fucking perfect, right? Him, Rayne, Caelum. Everyone but her apparently. Everyone in this fucking town was so perfect and had all their fucking life figured out by the age of ten. All except her. So why was she still here? She felt her eyes burning and she realised she wanted to cry now. Fuck Jayson.

[Jayson Kline]

He shoved his plate to the side and put his arms down for support, listening to Jen mumble about not being insecure as he plopped his head down on his arms. ''You're even insecure about being insecure, I see.'' He replied as she seemed to be done talking but instantly continued by explaining about empathy. Jay took that as a hint that she wanted that, well, he was capable of it but how did he know she was worth it? As of that moment she was just the sister of his best friend, a friend by proxy or so he thought. Apparently their definition of the word friend was off.

''Empathy I can do. Though I'm much better at apathy.'' He answered as he looked her in the eyes and slightly shifted on his seat. ''Might suit you even less though. Or wait!'' He propped his head up and smiled. ''Maybe if you were apathetic it might do something good!'' Not many people had the capability of doing what she just did, make him feel something, a version of extreme care; anger. Though he tried to keep it in,, it was obvious she was trying to push his buttons. And slowly but surely she was doing just that.

''I'm being honest.'' He said through gritted teeth. ''Honesty is best.'' Maybe a bit hypocrite of him to try and explain his honesty when he was getting angry at her doing the same. He wasn't trying to upset her though, and she was doing the whining. Whining? Yeah, whining. ''I suggest you stop doing this now.'' He suggested with a sigh. Last time he got worked up he ended up in the hospital. ''You wouldn't like me angry.'' Shame they weren't pretending to be avengers.

When she slammed down the glass, well, she broke the dam. ''I am not-'' She mentioned Rayne and how she probably couldn't wait to get away from him. Jayson clenched his fist and the glass Jen had just put down began to shake. ''Keep Rayne the fuck out of your attempts to hurt me!'' His voice was no longer silent nor his jaws clenched. People watched him but he failed to care. Apathy? Not at all. He wouldn't be angry if he did apathy.

The waitress stepped past their table and one of the empty glasses on it fell to the ground as his other hand joined the trembling action. ''Try to hurt me, okay, but you stay the hell away from Rayne!''

[Jen Mitchellson]

He seemed to enjoy hurting her. Jen turned to glare at him. Insecure about being insecure. "Whatever." She answered back, rolling her eyes, actually tired of every argument. He made her feel awful, hate herself even. She was sure he was a sociopath, actually feeling gratification over the unreleased tears in her eyes. He was even smiling, saying apathy would do her good. Asshole. Maybe it would to be honest, maybe then his words wouldn't sting so much. She shook her head, glaring at him.

Honest? "You're being an asshole. There's a big difference." She said, her glaring finally making a tear slide down her cheek and she wiped it away angrily. "I'm not doing anything!" She answered back, "I'm trying to defend myself from your abuse." She didn't need this. Not at all, not one bit and certainly not then, when just a few hours ago, she'd gotten the very same treatment from someone else. She bit on her lower lip, holding back the rest of her tears.

His powers went out of control as soon as she mentioned Rayne. Her eyes narrowed as she stared at him. "Why?" She asked, "Are you planning on hurting me physically too, Jayson?" Her voice was low, but it seemed his little act had brought in the attention of people around. This was exactly why people were so fearful about metas. Well, metas like Jayson. "You won't have to worry about me saying anything about anyone anymore. I'm out of here."

Jen stood up, stretching her arm over him to grab her bag, displaying her own powers in front of people as if nothing. Well, if he had no qualms doing that, then neither did she. All she wanted now was to get out of there. Without turning, or even saying good bye, she walked away from him. She needed a good cry, and she wasn't about to do it in front of him.