Such Fools (Rome)

[Tsukiko Aoki]

Tsukiko had Rome all to herself, a rare occurence when both his best friend and his young cousin lived nearby. It wasn't that she was glad James had the flu, but she didn't exactly mind that this freed up Rome's evening. She'd suggested Kali's because she liked the atmosphere, she liked the music, and....well, it wasn't very nice, perhaps, but she thought Rome was hilarious when he was drunk.

And Rome would get drunk. He was a lightweight, worse than she was despite being a great deal taller. She ordered a beer and sipped on it slowly throughout the evening, tittering to herself as Rome became more and more inebriated as the night wore on.

The door opened, allowing the sounds of laughter and motors and the faint hint of Rihanna's new single to drift into the bar, nearly obscuring the song the strung out young musician in the corner was croaking out. Kiko's eyes brightened and she began to hum along to Rihanna, tapping her foot in time.

"It's not too late yet, think the dance clubs are still open?" She nudged him in the side, gesturing to the door. "When you're done drinking. Which..." She eyed his nearly empty mug. "You probably need to be now."

She pursed her lips, watching her boyfriend as his ability to discern the direction of the floor versus the direction of the ceiling slowly waned, causing him to tilt dangerously. "I think I'm driving home. Keys." She didn't wait to see if he would hand them to her, instead diving for his pockets, a task made monumentally more difficult by the fact that he wasn't sitting up straight.

[Dr. Roman Tilford]

There had certainly been some sulking when Roman had learned that James was sick. Not just because it meant they couldn’t get together, but because even he was starting to think that his best friend had been through enough. But that had ended when Kiko had decided that it was date night, and brought up the possibility of Kali’s. Kali’s meant booze, and quite frankly, he needed a drink. His day had been a little rough, and he was happy to drop his sulking and go with her.

Of course, he had no idea it was partially for her entertainment.

Up on the bar stool, he was half bopping his head to the music playing in the bar, hands curled possessively around his rum and Coke. Of course, the moment he heard the Rihanna song from the road, he started mumbling the lyrics, mostly to himself. Issac, James, look away, lest you associate yourself with this idiot.

“Dance clubs?” Rome looked over at Kiko, a little grin on his face. “I like dance clubs.” ... Bravo, Captain Useless. Kiko’s right, you need to be cut off. His expression wavered from a grin to a pout as she pointed out the obvious. “But Kiiiiik! ‘m not done yet.” Despite the tilting on the stool, he remained upright enough to cling to his glass. It quickly became in his best interest to let go, however, when his girlfriend dove for the keys in his jacket pocket.

“You’re as drunk as me! No one’s driving.” He attempted to squirm away, definitely in danger of falling off of his perch. With the grace of a drunken hamster, he managed to get down from the stool without falling, and pulled Kiko into his arms. “We don’t need a dance club. We can dance right here.” Oh Rome. You need to go home, sweetie.

[Tsukiko Aoki]

"Yeah, you are." Kiko disagreed, eying his rum and coke -- and the white-knuckled death grip he had it in -- with silent amusement. "You're done. I'm telling you right now." If need be she would tell the bartender, though whether or not the young woman, who seemed quite interested in Rome and thus less than thrilled with the presence of Kiko, would listen to her rival was an open question. She would probably continue to supply Rome with drinks to keep him happy, or simply to do the opposite of whatever Kiko wished.

"Am not!" She laughed, batting ineffectually at his pockets. "I'm totally sober. Sober as a....as a....as Mormon." That wasn't quite as witty as she'd intended; perhaps she'd have to consider better analogies once they were home. "Whatever, I'm sober and I can dri-----eeek!" She shrieked as Rome pulled her closer, then burst into peals of laughter. Rome was absolutely correct; they were both drunk. Not that she wanted to admit that to him now that he'd pointed it out.

"Dance here?" She glanced over at the musician, then back at Rome. "You think the guitarist there knows any Lady Gaga?" She giggled, grabbing her boyfriend by the wrist and dragging him into the middle of the floor. "I can't dance to this acoustic stuff."

[Dr. Roman Tilford]

“Aww, no Kik. I’m not!” As if to prove it, he leaned forward, looking very much like he was going to flag down the bartender and request another. Lucky for him, she was occupied at the other end of the bar. “I’m not even drunk yet.” Thank you for that blatant lie, Roman. Care to share another? Like you’re a closet goth? No? All right then. True to form, he hadn’t even noticed the bartender’s attempts to flirt with him. Talkative, yes. Complimentary? Absolutely. But flirting? Noooo. Never.

“Are too!” He had to start laughing too as she fought with his jacket. “Mormons aren’t sober either. They aaalll drink. All of them.” At this point, he had no idea what they were talking about, but that was okay because drunks don’t need to make sense. Ever. Which was exactly why Roman figured he could ‘win’ the little spat they were having simply by pulling Kiko into him. Considering she was laughing, that meant that he’d just gotten away with it.

Score one for the clueless one.

“Why not?” He pulled back to look down at his girlfriend before breaking into little giggles. It was highly doubtful that the guitarist knew anything cool like Gaga. But it was still better than picking up and moving across the street to a dance club. It was fun here. “So? We can make our own. I know the words to Bad Romance!” No, Rome. You are not going to break into Lady Gaga unless you’re in the safety of your own home. ... Right? Right?

[Tsukiko Aoki]

"Nuh-uh! Have you ever met a Mormon who drinks? They don't even drink coffee." Kiko argued. Whether or not Mormons drank wasn't really an important topic in her mind, but Rome was fun to argue with, so if he wanted to argue that her analogy was a poor one then she would argue right back. "But the point remains, you're drunk, I'm sober."

She ineffectually smacked Rome in the chest, snickering. "You giggle like a girl." She'd told him this before, and would undoubtedly tell him again. Really she thought it was adorable, but she couldn't miss the chance to give him a hard time.

"Awww. That's so sweeeeeet. You would serenade me in public?" She batted her eyelashes at her boyfriend. There was a high likelihood they would end up escorted out of Kali's by the end of the night, but they would at least be having fun. "I think I remember some of the moves. Maybe between the two of us we'll manage a whole song and dance."

She wiggled her arms, doing what she thought was a very professional dance warm-up. "Okay, okay, on the start of three you sing and we'll both dance."

She took a deep breath and began to count down. "One.....two...."

[Dr. Roman Tilford]

“YES! Yes I have.” Rome, stop lying. “They drink everything.” In all honesty, he didn’t know, but it was fun to argue, especially when one was intoxicated. (Off of three rather weak rum and cokes, the wimp.) “That’s the not point. I’m not drunk. The point is about Mormons. And drinking. They drink.”

Please remind me why these two are dating.

The smack didn’t hurt, but it was enough to make Roman snatch for her hand and press a sloppy kiss to the back of it. “I do not.” He had the same comeback every time. Because he didn’t giggle like a girl. Really. He didn’t. It didn’t matter that Kiko and James and his co-workers all said it. Even Issac had said it. But it didn’t matter, because it wasn’t true.

There was absolutely no stopping the train, now it had left the station. Rome had an idea, and he was going to follow through with it. “Aww, ‘course I would, Kik! Because I love you!” ... If serenading someone in a very public place with Lady Gaga was Rome’s idea of showing his affection for someone, I’d had to see what he’d do to embarrass someone.

“Okay!” Apparently he was just a little enthusiastic over this idea, ignoring the odd looks they were getting. He waited, and as soon as they hit three, off he went.

“Ohhhh caught in a bad romance! Ra ra ah ah ah, roma, ro ma ma, gaga, ooh la la, WANT YOUR BAD ROMANCE.”

... Idiot.

[Tsukiko Aoki]

If Tsukiko had been ashamed of Rome's drunken antics then she wouldn't have dragged him out in public with the intentions of getting him drunk. In fact, she thought he was adorable, if a little absurd, and as she was now just as inebriated as he was she was even less inclined to be embarrassed.

"Aw, that's sweet of you." She repeated, without the barest trace of sarcasm; she really did think it was sweet that he was willing to turn Kali's into a dance club just for her.

When he began to sing (not nearly as well as Lady Gaga, though for someone who was both drunk and lacking in vocoder software Kiko thought he was doing fairly well) his girlfriend began what she supposed were the moves to the dance as seen in the music video.

She'd been a cheerleader in her high school years, which normally leant her some measure of gracefulness, but this was cancelled out by both drink and by the fact that she actually didn't remember most of the dance. Every now and again she got a move down, but for the most part she was flailing about with little resemblance to the original.

This would have been fine in the privacy of their own home, but in the middle of a bar, with waiters trying to get around them, it was very close to disastrous, particularly when she smacked one of the waiters in the face.

"Ooops." She bent over with giggles. "Sorryyyy."