Between time and space (Odion)

[Lani Hunter]

A week after Odion came back Lani still hadn’t left his apartment. Caroline had a key and near the end of that week she let herself in, she had been over earlier as well, but she was a comfort then. This time she was a terror. She had mercilessly pulled the blankets off of him and opened the blinds and declared that this was enough moping and if he didn’t get up right now she’d call their parents and tell them that she was worried about him and that they should probably pay him a visit. It was then Lani decided his sister was devious. She’d scolded him for his negligence of his health and wellbeing and nagged him about his beard long enough that he’d finally gotten up and begrudgingly showered and shaved. She pushed a plate of eggs and toast over to him when he had finally dug up some clean clothes. “Thanks,” he muttered his voice a little tired.

“Lani,” she said firmly, “I’m going to tell you something right now, and I don’t want to you take it the wrong way.”

“Okay?”

“You’re being an ass.” Well, Lani didn’t take it well, he tried to avoid it by saying he didn’t want to talk about it, but Caroline was relentless and she scolded him for being so cold and harsh. They had fought, probably high up on the scale, but certainly not the worst fight they had ever had. She ended up storming out eventually and left the telekinetic hot with rage and cold with guilt. It had taken only a few hours for Lani’s guilt to get the better of him and he’d called her to apologize. “Lani, I know he hurt you, but you can’t ignore the fact that you hurt him too,” Caroline had said bluntly but not without sympathy, saying something only she could because they were siblings because they were the only one who could. She continued, gently, “Listen, I’m not saying you have to forgive him, just give him a chance and hear him out. He deserves that much.”

He’d then built up the courage to return to classes where he might see Odion, he’d handed forged notes out to his professors claiming illness for the past few days. Much as he tried he couldn’t stop thinking about all that had happened between them, he begrudgingly admitted that Caroline was right, he should give Odion at least the chance to explain himself. But he was stubborn and he was scared so it took another few days of struggling to ignore Odion before he finally decided he couldn’t take it anymore. He was ashamed of how he was hiding and he knew Caroline was more than right and it was a hard pill to swallow.  The Astronomy class was packing up and Lani was vaguely aware that someone was talking to him. He shook himself out of his stupor and apologized with a little laugh, his mind was far gone from the present. They were setting up a study group, the test was going to be hard. Lani glanced back, he finally had some excuse that wasn’t a ‘I miss you’ that he could use to talk to Odion.

Lani’d walked up to Odion intent on apologizing but by the time he got there he had regressed and decided protecting his heart was more important and it turned quickly into a ‘say what needs to be said and leave’ kind of deal and came out a little like this: “Hey, a bunch of us are having a study group tomorrow for the test. We’re meeting in the library at five. You should come – I mean if you want to.” And he’d walked away as quickly as it was suitable to do in public. Well done, he thought sarcastically to himself, he had just hoped that Odion didn’t follow him then and that he could escape quietly until tomorrow. He had to admit though, when he got to the library it was hard to not look up with hope every time his power felt the door open and when his power did sense that it was Odion his heart leapt with excitement then sank just as quickly with fear. At least once everyone was introduced and they started studying Lani could become single minded and ignore everything else, or at least he tried to, but it was so hard with Odion being right there.

At least until the end then as people started trickling out Odion became harder and harder to ignore. Things had digressed and soon the study group was packing up and walking out the door. Now or never Lani decided, as they walked out into the chill. “Odion… can you wait up a sec?” he started, not looking at the redhead. He hesitated and glanced up to see if Odion was still walking or not.

[Odion Martins]

Odion had been receiving updates on Lani via texts from his little sister. It wasn’t like extreme details were being given, the messages were more along the lines of complaints: ‘Lani isn’t listening’, ‘He’s still moping’, and ‘Save me Odi’. It sort of amused Odion, but it broke his heart more than brought him joy. All he could respond with was: ‘I know how stubborn he is’, ‘Try again and again’, and ‘If he’s not listening there’s no point in talking – make sure he’s looking at you!’. Lani would kill him if he knew that Odion was giving conversational advice to his sister on how to talk to her own brother. But truly Odion owed the youngest Hunter – she had also given him tips. Lani was a complicated puzzle, and everyone he knew seemed to have a different piece of him.

Lani was up to his usual antics and had been in a state of despair for a few days. A week ago, Odion saw the love of his life, and a week ago, the love of his life ran away from him crying. That was not a good thing. But Odion didn’t see anything else to do but wait. During that week, he spent time getting to know the community college campus and making a couple new friends. He was getting better at pretending, but sometimes he was still an asshole. People seemed to find that more endearing now than when he was at Hammel – it was all very curious to him.

Every time Odion showed up to class he was hopeful of seeing Lani, and every day his hopes were dashed. But he knew that Lani had to return at some point; Lani was scared, but the man wasn’t a coward. Most of Odi’s class time was spent looking at other people, and he wondered if they even noticed that he was watching them text, fiddle around, and often picking at their noses or at their pants zippers – it was pretty amusing from his perch at the back of the class. Odion happened to be one of those annoyingly smart people who didn’t have to try to remember things, could do fuck all during class time, but still know the answer if the professor decided to pick on him, which wasn’t very often since he did know what the answers were. When Lani did finally return to class, Odion was the one fidgeting.

That's day's class had gone by very quickly. Everyone moved around him, but Odion stayed to watch Lani and who he was talking to. Lani seemed far away, and Odion swallowed hard – maybe he should, as Lani had suggested so many times before, just leave. He knew he was the reason why Lani appeared so on edge. But God, seeing Lani again even though they were in a bloody Astronomy class made him happy. Lani was most definitely fascinating to look at, sleek and well proportioned. When Lani approached him Odion didn’t move from his seat, hadn’t even reacted before Lani was moving away again. For God’s sake, was this how their every interaction was going to be like? He sighed, checking his watch before moving lower into his seat. Maybe he could catch a cat nap here before trying to find somewhere else to exist for the night. Most of the time he lucked out and spent nights in one of the many lecture halls – no one seemed to notice. He was the finest vagabond in all of Pilot Ridge.

Odion kept what few things he had in the Chemistry lab, because no one really used all of those vials. So long as his things didn’t blow up he’d be happy. Leaving for the library with his coat across his shoulders, Odion had his textbooks and a notebook under his arm. There weren’t any notes in it, but, he obviously wasn’t going to the library to study. He was going for Lani. His hand stretched up unconsciously and his fingertips toyed with his necklace, his ouroboros, before he tucked it under his black t-shirt. He walked into the library exactly ten minutes after five, glad he was the last to arrive. There wasn’t any room left on the table for more notebooks, textbooks, laptops, cell phones, or anything else the rest of the study group had splayed over the table. That was the whole idea. He pulled up a chair and didn’t say a word unless someone in the group puzzled over a question out loud, and Odion only answered because he was annoyed at how stupid some people could be. If he could’ve fast forwarded through this, he would have.

The more people that left, the more Odion could feel the tension inside of him building. This game of cat and mouse seemed endless to him, and he knew it wasn’t his turn to play. The ball was in Lani’s court, and if he didn’t do anything with it, then Odion would have to walk out with the rest of the little study group. But he believed Lani hadn't invited him to the study group just to hear the time turner's snarky replies to their group members. And Odion knew Lani wasn’t really a team player to begin with, he had remained silent nearly the entire study session.

When it seemed to be going nowhere, Odion took his things and got up under the pretext of heading outside to go ‘home’ with the rest of the group. Lani finally spoke and it was like music to his ears. The rest of the group dissipated ahead of them and Odion remained at Lani’s side. “I take it this isn’t about the cosmos,” he said, tying his teal blue scarf around his neck and consequently, his chin as well. Satisfied that his face wouldn’t freeze off, Odion chanced a glance in Lani’s direction. One of his favorite things about the chill, was that it brought color to Lani’s face. He readjusted the books under his arm and ignored the buzz his cell phone made, and just waited.

[Lani Hunter]

If only Lani knew his sister was in cahoots with Odion, then their fight would have probably been the worst they had ever had. It wasn’t fair that they were teaming up on him and if he had any sense he would have asked Caroline why she cared so much in the first place, but sense was something that was eluding him recently. Odion giving Lani distance was probably the best thing for the both of them, Lani wouldn’t feel pressured and Odion then wouldn’t be hurt when Lani snapped under the pressure. If Lani was a puzzle then Odion was just as complex, impossible to predict, like the weather, Lani always thought he had a pretty good idea of what would happen then something would happen that would throw everything for a loop, that didn’t mean he wanted to stop trying to understand, but they had been apart, he had changed, Odion had changed, he wasn’t sure how much of what he knew was still valid.

Lani’s power was acutely aware of Odion and not for a moment did Lani forget that his – ex? Something, friend, enemy, love he wasn’t sure anymore – was sitting in the back of the class. Was this normal? He felt like his and Adrianna’s breakup hadn’t been nearly this bad, he had missed her but when it came down to it they had simply fallen out of love. But he had been spending a lot of time with her in Odion’s absence and old emotions had been rising, perhaps driven by loneliness, perhaps not. Odion’s reappearance had thrown all of that out the window and the strength of his feelings in Odion’s direction, both bad and good were so overwhelming that he constantly felt like he was drowning.

The tension in his muscles was starting to ache and Lani kept waiting for the other shoe to drop while he was existing in the same space as Odion. Maybe he had been with Rhett during his time overseas, maybe he did remember everything and he had only come back to torture Lani, the thoughts whirled sometimes depressing and terrifying but Lani was inclined to examine all of the possibilities and a few of those did have happy endings. He found himself zoning out in class his thoughts far away in his memories and imagination. He was lucky the professor thought he had been sick and therefore didn’t call on him for anything because he wasn’t caught up yet. Lani almost could have throttled Odion, he loved this stuff and he couldn’t even focus on it because Odion was constantly in the back of his mind.

Lani was still working hard to keep a front up and make it out like everything was fine. He attributed his distraction to a little bit of residual weariness from illness when asked and otherwise he feinted a relaxed and calm state. The whole day leading up to the study group Lani’s mind race up with hope and imagined all possibilities where it could go right, only to plunge again when he imagined all of the ways it could go wrong. It was possible that he and Odion would start fighting, and then there would be witnesses and there were honestly a lot of projectiles laying around in a library. As soon as Odion came in and took a seat Lani was also fidgeting. He spoke in a low voice to those nearest to him when they examined a question. Lani once lifted his hands to hide his smile after one of Odion’s snarky remarks. A lot of things had changed but some never did, like Odion’s snippy and fiery personality.

For the most part though he kept his head down and focused on ignoring Odion. That could not be the way things remained. Whether they ended up turning into enemies or lovers when this ordeal was all over they still had to learn to be cordial since there was no way to avoid the fact that they were existing in the same space. Lani watched Odion for a moment, that scarf really brought out the color in Odion’s eyes. He'd neglected to get a good look back at his apartment but not that he had a chance to look Odion was even more attractive than he remembered. Odion had always been good at matching colors and knowing what looked good on him, Lani'd never appreciated it much before. He bit back a smart remark in favor of the seriousness of the situation. Lani shook his head, partially in response and partially to shake away the thoughts. For some reason it had never been too dark for Lani to find Odion’s eyes. He feinted interest in his boots and took a moment to remind himself to breathe. “I-uh,” he cleared his throat when it failed him and he reached up to scratch the back of his head. “I wanted to apologize for my actions the other night. It was uncalled for and I’m sorry.” Once the words were out Lani didn’t feel free of guilt but rather he just felt exposed.

[Odion Martins]

Odion still often had that strange feeling around Lani, beyond the butterflies and the other regular emotions. The time turner seemed to experience this sensation when he became close to people, which was why the people he became close to were few and far between. When he had let himself get close to Lani, and had tried to get closer to Declyn, their combined actions had caused a ripple effect in his mind and something snapped. While a willow tree could bend and not break in the wind, it could still break if the wind was strong enough. Odion would never forget that his birth name was really Sebastian. He would never forget his twin. And he would never forget Lani, even when his power had begged him to. He would always feel pulled to Lani; their powers were like opposite magnet ends.

Honestly, Odion hadn’t thought about Rhett in over a year. The French boy may have been his first of many things, but he was not Odi’s last. There had been a lot of bad there, and he still couldn’t believe to this day that he had allowed himself to be treated so poorly. He saw now, crystal clear, that he deserved better. Odion knew that Lani was entertaining thoughts of the worst case scenario, and Odion had done his best to dispel the thought. Thinking about him and Rhett together romantically made Odion want to gag on his own vomit. They were just too different. They had had the exact same upbringing and had spent some years together, but they were nothing alike. Odion had just been too weak to know it.

Things were different now.

The study group hadn’t been all bad, Odion was just insanely bored. The people around him kept giving him dirty looks, and he knew what they were thinking: Why did you come if you’re not even going to study? They knew and he knew it: he didn’t need to study. He made it seem that he only came because he wanted to rub in everyone’s faces just how much he knew. That was fine; it was something he had never been able to showcase before. But his favorite moment of the study was noticing the way Lani’s eyes smiled, even though he was trying to hide it. Maybe he didn’t love Odion, but there was no denying that he still liked him. Odion smiled slightly to himself at the thought, looking at the window in a spacey daze until another obvious question was asked. It would just be easier for him to sit in the middle of class during the test and have everyone copy his answers.

Odion wasn’t sure where he and Lani were headed, but he would walk all over town if that’s what it took to stay close to the blond. Odi listened and kept his eyes ahead, his hands in his pockets, he tucked his mouth under his scarf as well, hiding the broad smile on his face. He knew it; he knew Lani truly wanted to talk to him. It was all pretense! But if Lani ever asked him to another study group again... Odion dropped the subject in his mind. Lani had just apologized and here he was giddy over the fact that Lani was talking to him at all and he wasn’t even responding! Lani was actually talking to him! Odion coughed and took a deep breath, the gears of his mind spinning quickly.

Finally, he smirked pleasantly at Lani. “Actually, it went better than I thought it would.” In other words, there was no need for an apology. “I’m sorry as well,” Odion continued, looking ahead once more, the cold air turning his breath into puffs of cold smoke. “I knew the very sight of me would upset you, but I saw no other way and I had to see you again.” It really was as simple as that. They could pick up from that night a week ago, or more likely, start over. Lani seemed to be in more of a listening mood today.

[Lani Hunter]

Lani was involved enough, or at least had his books out and was studying enough to make it so that he was participating. It was a good thing because it actually forced Lani to crack a book and study, because there were others doing the same thing. He should have known Odion wouldn’t be too keen on the idea and when the guy who organized it all gave Lani an accusing look because Lani had invited the redhead along Lani just shrugged like he didn’t have a clue what was wrong. If Odion was lucky he wouldn’t be invited back to study, if Lani was unlucky he also wouldn’t be invited back to study. He was more sympathetic than Odion and helped as much as he could. It was so hard to concentrate with Odion around, especially since they were unofficially not speaking, at least not yet.

This couldn’t be more difficult to do if they tried. They could have burned everything in a pyre and started over completely and it would still be just as hard. He had to admit that by the end of the study group he was very close to escaping back to his apartment, forget asking forgiveness and being cordial. He was scared and he was hurt and he wasn’t sure what he wanted. Part of what Lani had said the other night was truth. He had lived every second of Odion’s absence and in that time Lani had had to learn to deal with the pain and to dispel it. He’d had to learn, or relearn what it was like to stand on his own, and accept the fact that he had to do it on his own. It was that mindset that made it impossible to go back to the way they were. As sad as it was to admit, Lani had realized things about their relationship had not been healthy either.

They hadn’t treated each other poorly, contrary it seemed like they were falling over themselves trying to help one another even if the other didn’t want help. Odion had been his everything and Lani recognized that as a dangerous situation. When he’d told Avi that Odion was his everything he realized how flawed that was. Because Odion was his everything, Lani could be nothing once he was gone, and he had been. He had been nothing when Odion had left. It had taken a lot of work to remember who he was separate and alone. Lani blinked and shook his head, why was he thinking about himself and Odion as if they still were. They had been, now they were separate, so why was he automatically thinking in terms of ‘us’ and ‘I’ in different contexts. He shoved off the thoughts and just reminded himself he wasn’t going to start a fight.

It took Odion a long time to answer, long enough that Lani glanced up at him to check to see if Odion was going to say anything at all. He was watching soon enough to see the signs of the smile he couldn’t see before Odion washed it away. There it was. That smirk that Lani loved so much, and he absolutely hated now because of the way it still made him feel. It was as if Odion hadn’t been gone seven months. The reminder from his mind caused Lani to close himself off. He shrugged and a huff that almost sounded like a laugh slipped out his teeth. Odion had a point, they were both here and both breathing, which was a good sign. Lani didn’t answer at first but instead shoved his hands in his pockets for warmth as he considered the answer. He looked at Odion and tried to read him, see through him, to figure out if this was all some elaborate game to him. He bit his tongue, he wasn’t going to tell Odion it was good to see him, even if it was.

“Have you seen anyone else, yet?” He asked instead, dodging the true issue at hand. Odion had just wanted to see him? The first thought was that Odion was making it up, telling him what he wanted to hear, the second was that maybe it was true. If it was it warmed Lani’s heart and he struggled to keep it from beating too loudly and warming back up to Odion. Something was still nagging at him though. “I don’t get it. How did you even find me?” He asked with an façade of curiousness when he really just wanted to throttle whoever it was that gave Odion his address. Lani’d changed his phone number, or rather, tossed his old phone off a Boston pier, and he’d never actually had a chance to give Odion his address before they left. Speaking of which, Odion’s apartment, the one he’d gotten, would probably not have been held for him, so Lani wondered with who Odion was staying. The thought that Odion was living wherever was warm hadn’t crossed his mind.

[Odion Martins]

If Lani were kicked out of the study group, he could always simply study with Odion – it was just a thought.

Odion had come back to try and repair things with Lani, or at the very least, have some contact with him. Not having something romantic was killing the ginger, but that wasn’t something he could force, and it wasn’t something which would be authentic if he tried. It was Lani’s call to make, and Odion would probably wait a long time for Lani to make up his mind, or at least parts of it at a time. Odion didn’t have anything else to do anyways, and Lani was the reason he was back in the first place – he didn’t know how to stand alone, not anymore. And, he didn’t want to. But if all this work was going to amount to nothing, if Lani had already made up his mind one way or another, Odion wished to know of that decision now, so he could decide what to do with his life.

Odion had a nasty habit of clinging to those he most loved, and living for them. He often thought he knew he was, and spent a lot of time thinking about it, but he had decided that he was the sum of many parts. Who he hung out with was one part, and what he did was another. What his passions were made him, and his power affected it all. He knew that Lani could be his everything, a part of him, his heart, and he would still be able to function. But Odion didn’t want to meander through life, he didn’t want to be robotic. Life wasn’t meaningful if he was alone – without Lani, the rest didn’t matter. If people didn’t like that, then he could just be who he was before he had met Lani. Cold, miserable, and dead inside.

It felt like Lani wasn’t giving any kind of ground to the situation. When Odion had finally gotten into Lani’s life, it hadn’t been easy. He hadn’t been so generous, he had asked Lani to be better and give more. And Lani had. And that wasn’t to say that Lani had given him a lot of room – he could stand comfortably on the ground Lani had given him then. Now, Lani had killed any kind of spark even while it was happening. Odion was waiting to be acknowledged or noticed, but Lani was still testing the waters. Lani was treating him like a stranger, and Odion hated that.

Odion raised his eyebrows, clearly disappointed at that question. “If by that you mean have you seen anyone else who loathes me, yes, I have. Adrianna ran into me last week after I left your apartment, and Avi has been sending me nasty texts.” Not that any of that was surprising and Odion explained these happenings in a flippant manner. Odion smirked at the next question. Lani was always so full of questions and yet loved to hide his answers. “A friend knew of your whereabouts,” he said, because that was information Lani would not know for a very long time. Odion cared for Caroline too much to rat her out. Snow began to fall lightly and dust the ground before them. “Anything else you’d like to know?” He asked, trying to open a few more doors for Lani to enter.

[Lani Hunter]

Lani had done a bit of thinking in his solitude this past week and it had been some painful and some happy thoughts. He kept bouncing between options. He could pretend he didn’t care and hurt Odion so badly that he never returned. Lani held the words like a weapon on his tongue but the thought of Odion leaving again stalled his lips and he wasn’t sure he could survive if the time turner left again. He could pretend he just wanted to be friends, but how long would that last before for one of them it simply wasn’t enough anymore. What they had had before, despite its flaws and smothering effect was beautiful. He could give into Odion and his own heart open up to Odion again and welcome Odion back the way he deserved. There was also a fourth option which Lani hadn’t considered much because the ending was unknown. They could be together and he could retain his sense of self. Maybe, maybe that was a possibility also.

Lani stood and entertained the different options from the worst to the best but they all had a touch of bitterness. Odion might be sure of himself but he was also sure of a lot more things than Lani at the present moment. The blond let out a long breath and watched as it saturated the cold air and drifted away from him. Odion was like breathing, Lani could take him in but he couldn’t keep him entirely, but he gave Lani a life that he hadn’t had in months. He woke in Lani a part of him that had been dormant all this time. A give and take. Lani didn’t want to meander, but he also didn’t want to run. Lani had drifted long enough in his own mind that he was lost, just as lost as Odion, but unlike the redhead he was unable to admit that he was still just drifting. He felt like here with his eyes on Odion they were playing an elaborate game of chess of which neither wanted to win because it would destroy the other. They had to beat down the issues between them until there was nothing left but two kings at a stalemate, dancing around each other until they had to stand.

Lani winced a little bit, because that was also partially his fault, but he had tried to take blame. Neither of the mentioned women had been willing to take Lani’s opinion and because Odion wasn’t there to defend himself turned on the redhead. Adrianna had told him how she saw him on her way in. And Avi… well Avi was going to kill him, that was pretty much the only was Lani saw that going from the fury he’d witnessed. It was a wonder that he didn’t kill Odion as well. “I’m sorry,” he said, “I didn’t even want to tell Avi, but she had the kittens and…” Lani started to ramble and cut himself off. What was he doing? Offering an explanation? Taking blame? Lani didn’t even know. Either way that was that, he couldn't take it back. It wasn't his fault he'd turned into a blubbering mess when she asked him how the trip went.

A friend? “Hmmm,” was all that acknowledged the response verbally, but Lani’s eyes narrowed with suspicion and he started walking. If Odion didn’t want to tell him he could find out on his own. It wasn’t a fast walk, more of, well more of a meander. He glanced back and paused ever so slightly. He wanted to talk but he also wanted to get home eventually and that meant finding the bus or walking. If this was some battle he didn’t know who he was fighting, but it wasn’t Odion, maybe he was fighting himself. Odion opened the doors and Lani answered. “Yeah,” he said turning just a little to look at Odion, "How are you?" He was speaking loudly enough in the hopes that he could get Odion to walk with him.

[Odion Martins]

For Odion, there had been no other option as soon as his conscious mind took her. He realized he was on autopilot and had to fight not to let his subconscious mind take over and do what seemed natural – stay as far away from Lani and pain and love as possible, drink, smoke, hook up, and otherwise exist. But that wasn’t freedom – not really. Odion was either here, or he was everywhere, becoming one with time itself. But time wasn’t personal, it had no human connection. It doesn’t care about who it affects or who dies or lives. It would exist of its own accord if it could help it.

Odion wasn’t here because this was a game to him, he was here because being with Lani meant life. Even if that meant he had to keep his power in a box right now, even if it meant he could never use his powers again. He would rather be with Lani, than control everything around him, which wasn’t worth the price of mentally losing Lani again. He could have wandered forever, but he wasn’t lost, he belonged somewhere – now he just had to wait, and fight for it if he must. Their relationship hadn’t been perfect, but it never would be, and Odion was okay with that. He could never promise that it would be perfect. But when he did promise something, he meant it with his entire heart.

Shrugging, Odion didn’t understand why Lani was apologizing. “And she was there for you,” he stated bitterly, because he hadn’t been there when he should have been. Lani had sought comfort elsewhere and that was just how things had played out. Odion wasn’t sure if what was left of them could be salvaged, but if not, then something new could be created. He was no longer the bitter redhead Lani had met on the grounds of Hammel, but a young man who had been through much. It didn’t define him anymore, he didn’t pity himself and no one else should. The thought of the kittens, cats now, made Odion deeply sad. “Did she keep them then? The kittens?” Maybe she hated him enough now that she had happily given them up to the shelter in Pilot Ridge. But maybe he could still get them back… He wasn’t sure where he’d keep them, but that wasn’t the important part.

Glad Lani didn’t press the subject, Odion relaxed knowing that Caroline was safe for now. He just hoped Lani wouldn’t take it out on him once he did find out. Odion didn’t have anywhere to be, so if it was walking Lani wanted to do, he would continue on doing so. Odion braced himself for accusations and why related questions, but Lani had asked something else. A surprised look overcame his face, and he looked at Lani as though asking ‘are you serious?’. “Curious…” Odion said softly, his eyebrows furrowing. He hadn’t been prepared for that question in any way shape or form. “I didn’t think you would ask that Lani.” Or in other words, I didn’t think you cared.

How are you? It was a big question to answer and Odion didn’t know how. “Really and truly, I don’t know. I’m trying to figure out some missing memories, and my time turning has come to a stop,” he smiled in a sad way. Maybe if he tried explaining things to Lani as though he might still care this might be easier. He looked at Lani seriously, taking a leap of faith. “I don’t want to be lost anymore.”

[Lani Hunter]

It was so natural and yet so strange to have Odion here. Lani recognized the signs that he was slipping into old habits. Worrying about Odion and he wanted things to just be how they were, but he was selfish in holding onto what he had gained in these past few months. He had gained so much, but he had also lost a great amount. Odion, for one, his heart for another. If Odion could still reach within him so deeply that he could wake Lani’s guarded heart. There had to be something still here, Lani bit his lip and tried not to see it, how could there still be something here after all this time? As much as he wanted desperately for there to be something in the air between them, it terrified him all the same. Odion had broken his heart, shattered it into a million little pieces and now he was back and Lani was kicking himself for wanting him.

Lani didn’t want a perfect relationship, but he did want something that he could rely on and if past experience had anything to do with it, Odion was reliable if they were working together but when things went poorly between them Odion hadn’t been there. Now, Lani wasn’t sure how much of that should be excused based on power or not but it didn’t change the fact that Lani had been alone. Lani winced at the thought because if he were to flip his perspective then he wasn’t there for Odion either, not when his power took over and Odion might have needed him. Lani shook his head at the thoughts and in his pockets he clenched his fists and he felt himself spiraling. This was his fault. Odion had gone because of him. The pain had been dealt by the telekinetic’s own hand. How much of Lani’s anger was really at Odion, and now only because there was blame to be shared.

His eyes cast down to watch his boots passing over the concrete instead of answering because it was true. She’d been there for him more than he had ever imagined. He had expected when he first told her that she would be furious with him and he’d been sideswiped by the fact that she was so angry with Odion. She would have been there for Odion, before she had ever been there for Lani, he knew she would have been there for Odion. Lani shook his head, “No, I’ve got them.” He closed his eyes, the kittens, cats now. “They’re so big, now.” He mused and after a moment of consideration he dug out his phone. Odion had been the kittens primary caretakers and he would never forget the way L.J. had meowed at the door and then meowed at Lani as if to demand to know where Odion was. Lani didn’t feel right keeping the kittens from Odion, but he also didn’t want Odion in his apartment, so he compromised as best he could. “Here,” he said holding up his phone for Odion to see. On the screen was a picture, he’d tried to get all three but Darshay had been very interested in the camera and it had resulted in being a picture of Darshay’s face and Shadow looking grumpy sitting on the arm of the couch. “You can’t see it in that picture, but L.J. was preparing to pounce on Shadow.” He found himself smiling freely and even gave a little chuckle.

The kittens had been what had first really shown Lani that Odion wasn’t just a hard shell. He was a loving and caring person. Beneath all of those sharp defenses. His smile ran away from his face and the mask slipped back on. Damn, he needed to stop slipping, he couldn’t just fall back into this. All of the fighting and all of the pain he couldn’t do it. He raised a brow in askance and just shrugged in response. Maybe Lani cared, maybe he didn’t. He couldn’t very well have Odion thinking that he had him all figured out. Lani was angry and he was hurt but he wasn’t heartless. Despite all of the things he tried to tell himself. He wanted to not care but honestly without knowing Lani would worry himself to pieces, he was already running on limited sleep as visions of the redhead occupied his days now as well as his dreams. It had been easy to sleep before, because in his dreams he could be with his time turner and they could just be. But those were dreams, and there were some dreams that were far from reality, he reminded himself.

Frowning in thought Lani tried to figure out if there was some double meaning that Odion was trying to get at, as if the redhead were toying with him. Lani couldn’t get past the idea that Odion was here and that if he was here that he wasn’t here with malicious intent. He raised a brow, Odion had stopped using his power, entirely? He was about to ask about that when Odion spoke again and Lani’s lips closed again, this time in a thin line as he clenched his jaw. He wavered a bit in his steps half wanting to reach out and half wanting to run and equalizing in the middle and retaining no action. “I don’t know what you want from me.” Lani said coldly and with a touch of desperation. He didn’t want to talk about what they had right now. He was trying protect himself. He knew he loved Odion, but he wasn’t sure he could handle the pain of losing him again.

[Odion Martins]

The truth of the matter was that both of their hearts had been shattered, just at different times and in different ways. As much as they both wanted each other, people couldn’t always have what they wanted. Odion was so used to simply enjoying and taking whatever he wanted whenever he fancied that he had never really had to work hard for anything before. That wasn’t to say life was easy and had been handed over to him on a silver platter. He knew that stealing was a fine art in and of itself, but relationships… Human emotion… Yeah, he didn’t have any idea where to start with those things, and he was still learning. Had still been learning when Lani came back to America.

Odion had been hurt many times before, so when it felt as though Lani were hurting him… Well, it hurt like nothing he had ever felt before. It was true, that saying about how those you love end up hurting you the most. If they didn’t mean anything to you, what they did wouldn’t matter to begin with. But Lani mattered. What he did mattered. What he said mattered. How he treated Odion and their relationship mattered. That was why Odion had a hard time letting go of that hurt. Had a hard time remembering all of the fun times they had had together and instead dwelt on the negative experiences. He was used to being hurt, why would their relationship be any different?

But Odion needed it, he needed Lani in his life. For as much bad and pain and hurt that there had been, there had been love, joy, and self-discovery. Odion would never realized just how strong, how good he could be, if it weren’t for Lani. Odion didn’t want to be with Lani because he felt as though he owed something to Lani, but because he wanted to make Lani as happy as Lani made him. They had just never really talked about things when they were scheming something, good or bad. They were both loners and used to doing things without the other’s permission. If anything, that was what Odion had learned from this. It was why he was trying to be honest now, even if it didn’t make sense or scarred Lani away. He just wanted to be better than he was yesterday, but he had to sort out those time lapses before he could move on. Odion didn’t blame Lani for that, because when Odion had been going through his time alone and lost in Europe, he had immediately forgotten when he had called out Lani’s name. He had wished for Lani, and his power had trapped the memories away. The pain was there, equal to what Lani had experienced, but it was locked away and Odion wasn’t sure he wanted to open that box of memories, not when his power had already been so destructive. Seeing Lani the way he was now, Odion wasn’t sure he could go through with it.

Odion was upset that Avi hadn’t defended him at all, or maybe she had, he wasn’t sure. But he decided that it was easier for her to be mad at him because she really did care about him, but Lani was the one in tears. Lani was the one who needed comfort, and at that point it would’ve just been easier to take sides, than try to defend everyone. Plus nobody thought he was ever coming back, he knew that, and yet was still upset that people hadn’t even bothered trying to understand what he had been going through. Here he was, meek and mild, and no one noticed? No one thought that was peculiar? Odion closed his eyes, a relieved smile across his face. So Lani had kept the cats… Of course. Something akin to pride crept through his body; of course they were big, they were well taken care of. Watching the picture on the phone, Odion had the scene play out in his mind as Lani described it. “I’m not surprised,” he said, letting Lani’s laughter fill the cold spots of his heart. He had been a fool to have stayed away this long. When Lani drew his phone away, Odion thought he had seen a different picture for the telekinetic’s home screen. He thought it was of the two of them, but perhaps that was just wishful thinking.


Odion sighed, “I don’t really know either.” The weight of the necklace remained heavy against his chest, as though his heart were drawing energy from it. To say he wanted what they had before would put into action a wish which would never come true, for he knew that Lani would most definitely deny him that. And in all reality, what they once had could never be had again. “Something…” Odion looked at Lani, wanting nothing more than to pull him close and never let go. He loved him, he still did. Basically anything Lani was willing to give Odion would take – that was what Odion meant. That was what the desperation across his eyes spelt. Odion cleared his throat and sort of laughed, trying to break the tension. “I didn’t come back here for the prestigious business school opportunity.” Odi could feel his face flush and he tried to further hide behind the scarf – Lani didn’t know that Odion had been considering going into business school. He really didn’t know how to be funny.

[Lani Hunter]

The truth was not always something that Lani wanted to see, Odion could probably attest to that. He was stuck in a selfish phase at the moment, a long prolonged phase that had initiated when he and Odion broke up. He’d had to keep moving and therefore had to look out for himself. Lani wanted to be sympathetic to Odion’s equal pain, but it was difficult because he was the source of that pain, continued to be the source and no matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise he had started it all. Then he had left. He had wondered time and again what would have happened if he had stayed but he wasn’t a time turner, he couldn’t go back and change it. The telekinetic clenched his jaw and shook his head slightly at his own thoughts.

He knew what Odion wanted and what he wanted and those things coexisted quite nicely, but he wasn’t sure he could let himself be hurt like that again. He didn’t understand Odion’s power enough to make judgment on it and he only knew that his power had to be controlled because people got hurt when he lost control. So he’d shut it down and let it out in little doses, he had support for him here and he’d recovered. But in his recovery he had become colder, more distant. And now that Odion was back all of that work was looking to be unraveled. Lani looked at Odion, maybe if they did things differently things would turn out differently. He’d taught himself that the truth was what broke them up and that the truth was wrong. Lying was easier and significantly less painful, but looking at Odion here he knew it would be easy to tell him a lie, but that wasn’t what Lani wanted.

On the one hand, Lani wanted Odion to feel every stab of loneliness he had felt, and on the other hand, he wanted to shield the redhead from what he’d gone through. Lani pocketed his phone again, unfortunately Odion’s mind was playing tricks on him, Lani’d gotten a new phone and there were no pictures of Odion. He’d locked Odion away deep in his mind and under his bed in a box. Now that Odion was here he had almost gotten to the point where temptation made him open the box. He avoided it, though now instead of under his bed it sat on his desk and stared at him long into the night. Lani looked at Odion and tried to read him. Something was definitely different about the time turner. A lot had changed, indeed. Lani had been wrong before. “Sometimes they’re just little demons.” He agreed with a shake of his head. Adam’s poor dog was their new favorite thing to torture.

Lani sighed exasperatedly and turned away again. That was a whole lot of not helpful! Something? He locked eyes with Odion and saw their plea and matched it with his own. Something? What could he give the redhead without contradicting everything he claimed he’d worked for and wanted? Odion was the only person who knew him in all of his horrible tendencies and all of his attempts at goodness. Odion had been the only person Lani could talk to about all of his crazy theories and obsessive worried. Lani swallowed, if he couldn’t talk to Odion, who did that leave? The forced laugh only struck Lani like a blow, that wasn’t the laugh he remembered and the familiar ache in his heart yearned for Odion. Lani shook his head, this wasn’t working, they weren’t going to fix anything this way. Odion was trying hard and Lani was evading every attempt to reach out. Maybe it was high time Lani stopped hiding.

Lani’s lips went to move, tell Odion that he was scared, to tell Odion that he had promised himself he would never love again. It now made Lani wonder if he had told himself that because his only love was Odion. “Something?” He echoed, and something in his heart snapped, “You want to know something?” When you were gone I felt like I had died! His thoughts screamed in his head, and now you’re back and I’m terrified you’re going to leave me!  “Odion, I don’t know. I’m not sure of anything right now, I don’t know if I can help,” Lani said more mildly, "Just..."  Stay. Lani bit his lip and his heart remembered breaking and shattering and Lani slipped back into hiding. Lani was silent for a moment then abruptly and obviously changing the subject, “Really? Business?”

[Odion Martins]

Odion was tempted to offer just that – a re-do. A simple change of one event that would eliminate all other events which occurred after it. But that simply wasn’t how things worked in the real world, and it wouldn’t be right to do that, even if they both thought it was a good idea. He would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of doing it, but that just wasn’t going to happen.

Apparently people got hurt when Odion wasn’t in control of his power either, just not in the physical sense. Odi didn’t want to hurt Lani, had never really meant to, but everything had spiraled out of control and out of the range of his better judgement. As with most things, perhaps the third time was the charm. But Lani had always been Odi’s personal good luck charm, though the blond was no object.

“I think that’s how all cat owners feel,” Odion said, since he had never heard of anyone completely adoring everything their cat did. They were cute, yes, and they could be fun and feisty, but no one really likes torn up furniture, hair balls, or scratches and bites. But even with all the bad, Odion still missed them, especially LJ. The little feline liked him the most and seemed a little snobby with everyone else. Odion smirked at the thought – everyone has their favorites after all. The more time he spent with animals the more he realized they made more sense than humans, and that was extremely comforting.

This was hard. This was the hardest thing Odion had ever done, and that included trying to get rid of Lani’s Boston Boss. It was harder than meeting Lani’s family. This was harder than having Rhett show up after he had abandoned Odion. But Odion didn’t care how hard it was, he only cared that he was here now, trying to do something about it. Because that was all he had at the end of the day: determination. Knowing looks were passed between them and Odion finally looked away. He couldn’t just decide what he wanted, that wasn’t fair. But Lani always seemed to need concreteness, especially when it came down to defining his relationships. A small voice in Odion’s head simply asked for friendship, but they were lovers and going from lovers to friends didn’t really work in the real world. It wasn’t what Odion wanted anyways. There were so many things that he could say, but Odi kept his mouth shut.

Odi felt like he was falling, falling and like he would never hit the ground so he could get back up again. Lani asked if Odion wanted to know something and Odion simply waited to hear what he had to say. Lani wasn’t sure either, and Odion wondered if there was any way to repair the trust which had been broken between them. His eyes were downcast as they trotted through the snow. “Okay.” What else could he say? Neither of them knew how to do this, and he really couldn’t expect Lani to be his saving grace all the time.

Odion sighed, moving his arms as they walked to get some blood flowing through them. “Sure why not? I speak numerous languages, math is fairly simple for me, I’m charming...” He smirked at himself, wondering how long he could pretend to be okay. He could have everything in the world but if he didn’t have Lani, none of the rest truly mattered. “Do you think you’ll do well on that Astronomy test?” He asked, already knowing the answer but unsure of what else to ask. He had never asked anything school related before, but he didn’t know what else to do. He would just have to buy time the old fashioned way in order to allow himself some time to think.

[Lani Hunter]

It just wasn’t fair. What they had had was not perfect, but it was good. Lani loved Odion and things had been good and Europe had been amazing. Traveling together, Lani was actually surprised they didn’t kill each other, mostly because Lani was a fish out of water and was probably offending someone just by the harshness of his accent. But it had been amazing, all up until the very end which it all came undone. It was starting to seem to Lani that he did whatever he could to deny himself happiness. Things were going great with Odion and therefore he had to ruin it. He couldn’t possibly just be happy. Lani ran a hand through his hair agitatedly before retreating his cold fingers back into his pocket. He stole a glance at Odion. The redhead looked just as torn as he was. Lani bit his tongue and shoved down the feelings that were threatening to tear him to pieces.

He never thought he was going to see Odion again and there he was and Lani wanted to drink in his presence, and that ever warm sensation that happened when his power got too close. Lani’s mind backtracked a bit, how could Odion not be using his power? He’d had such a better handle on his power than Lani had of his own, now it appeared to have flipped, if only because Lani controlled his by pure willpower and stubbornness. Lani laughed a little, “I’m the crazy cat guy,” he supplied with a smile inviting Odion to join in the joke. Lani’s smile quickly vanished. He knew Odion missed them, and honestly he knew that if it came down to it the cats, especially LJ, despite the fact that he had fed them all this time, chances were they would be way more excited to see Odion than they ever were to see Lani. He still didn’t think that LJ liked him, LJ was a sly little beast.

Friendship was a wishful thought coming from both sides, but there was no going back. Certain lines had been crossed and even as they dodged the truth, they both knew more about each other than the other wanted to admit. Lani had been okay with that. He never imagined a time or a place in which Odion wasn’t there. Lani supposed he took Odion for granted, but he didn’t know what he could offer the redhead now. Odion didn’t press the issue and somehow that didn’t sit quite well with Odion. He was so used to Odion digging and digging until he pissed Lani off enough that he snapped. Well, Lani’s temper was shorter than it used to be, maybe Odion was playing it safe and not trying to push him. Lani respected that and yet at the same time it reminded him of what was lost between them. There was a time when Odion could call Lani out for being unnecessarily stubborn and pigheaded and there was a time when Lani could call Odion out for the same. Now, they were walking on broken glass, again.

Lani watched Odion, feinting mild interest, but his eyes were tracing over Odion’s face, his features, his lips as he spoke. He certainly couldn’t argue with that. Odion, his Prince Charming. The thought startled Lani so much that he flushed and turned away. Where had that come from? His mind moved in a million different directions trying to explain itself and to dismiss the thought and to protect Lani from what he really meant. He didn’t know exactly when he’d acquired this ability to lie to himself and Lani was quite possibly the most gullible of all of the people he had ever manipulated. Then Odion asked about the test and Lani had to focus to formulate an answer. “Yeah, I mean it’s pretty easy if you read,” Lani said, “You?” Something about small talk just felt so wrong. “How are your other classes going?” He looked up, they were getting closer to the bus stop now, but it was late and chances were that the buses were running slow. It just occurred to Lani that he didn’t know where Odion was staying.

[Odion Martins]

Perhaps in comparison to what everyone else deemed as healthy, they didn’t have a healthy relationship. But they weren’t like everyone else, not even close. Out of all the people Odion had met, only a couple knew they lifestyle he and Lani shared, a life of crime and loneliness – that wasn’t normal. And just like an irregular heart need a pacemaker, Odi’s irregular heart needed Lani. It just didn’t matter what everyone else thought; Odion hadn’t cared about that before and he wasn’t about to start now. Europe had indeed been amazing, and Odion had only fallen more in love because Lani was trying, and his American accent was adorable. But maybe Lani was right, maybe he did try his best to be unlovable in order to remain unscathed and consequently, untouched. And Odion was having a hard time not touching Lani. If anything was amiss, it was being close to Lani.

Odion wasn’t sure how he would explain what was happening with his power, but right now that wasn’t the subject at hand and hopefully it wouldn’t be for a while. He needed to think about it and try and understand it himself, though he suspected it was because of their last fight as a couple. Odion swallowed hard, accepting the harsh reality that they really weren’t together anymore. The redhead chuckled deep in his throat. The tables really had turned, after all, hadn’t he been the crazy cat lady? “Whatever makes you happy on the inside Lani.” Odion was glad that the cats had been kept, and Lani seemed to be enjoying them. Cats were fickle creatures to deal with and if Lani had voluntarily done it, then there must have been some reward to go with keeping them.

Lani knew Odion best of all, Odion would happily admit that. He couldn’t have chosen a better person if he tried, but the fact still remained that friendship was impossible between them. For now, Odion was exhausted, it showed under his eyes. Even if his heart wanted to fight, his brain could not. The spunkiness died in him the moment he had to use most of his mental energy to keep his power at bay until he could sort out how to have it live in harmony with him. They both knew that Odion would usually be fighting tooth and nail right now, but such was not the case. Not today.

Odion hadn’t been looking at Lani to notice the blond looking at him. But he did look at the blond when Lani seemed flustered at the simple question, and Odion raised an eyebrow. God how he longed to know what was going on in the telekinetic’s mind. Lani had always been and would always be the most intriguing person Odion had ever met. Small talk was Odion’s forte – with strangers. How had Lani become a stranger to Odion? Odi could feel tears in his eyes and he blinked them away. “Should be fine,” he said, trying and failing to disguise the warble in his voice. There was a buzzing in his ears and he had ignored Lani’s next question because he hadn’t heard it. His dark blue eyes looked up at the bus stop sign. Everything was against him.

Odion turned slightly, looking at Lani. “I uh, you...” What was there to say? “You probably want to go home.” His eyes finally went downwards and he sniffed. It hurt to say that, to know that Lani’s home wasn’t where the time turner was. “I’ll see you at school.” Odi wasn’t looking for agreement, what he was looking for had been lost, and he wasn’t sure if he would ever be able to find it again. For now, he needed a break from this, from Lani. His power was threatening to rear it’s ugly head and Lani didn’t know just how bad that could be.

[Lani Hunter]

It was so easy to get lost in what they had had and Lani was shying away from the idea of letting himself get too close again, but he missed it so dearly. He missed Odion so dearly. Lani wished that there was someone objective he could talk to. It seemed at this point, Caroline was most certainly on the side of getting them back together, Adrianna was definitely feeding the anger Lani felt, Avi was probably not a good person to talk to, as she was furious with the redhead. Like everything he was starting he would have to do this on his own. Lani smiled slightly and bit his tongue to keep it from sticking out at Odion. Lani was starting to fumble in his own mind for answers. Odion was here and he was trying and Lani was shutting him down at every turn. Lani wanted to wrap his arms around himself and protect himself. He knew Odion wouldn’t stick around forever, not if Lani wasn’t being receptive at all. Odion wouldn’t try forever but at this moment here he knew if Odion left again he would be just as broken as the first. But Lani couldn’t force himself to bend because he was afraid that if he bent he would break.

Lani’s heart wavered when he heard the shaking in Odion’s voice. He’d heard that before and he knew well what it meant. Lani squeezed his eyes shut, only this time was different, he wasn’t running to comfort Odion. He took a deep breath and tried to calm his mind and keep himself somewhere he could still be in control. His distress seemed to signal to his power that something was wrong and Lani clamped down on it as it reached out. If Lani were smart he would let it out and relieve the pressure in his skull, and just keep it from working, as he was learning to. But old habits were hard to break, especially when stress and heartache were added onto the table. He nodded like he hadn’t noticed and looked up wishing they could see the stars beyond the thick cloud deck. Snow fell slowly and lightly and Lani was still able to see up without squinting.

When he downcast his eyes again he bypassed looking at Odion and glanced back at their footprints. Two pairs of prints showed on the pavement. Lani couldn’t tell from the light and the illusion of parallel lines may have been at play but the twin pairs of feet seemed miles away from each other. There had been a moment when those pairs of feet would be nearly touching, now they spanned almost the entire sidewalk. Lani’s heart wanted to scream, they were growing apart in all things, they were even engaging in small talk and fumbling desperately for something they couldn’t be sure they could find in the dark. Lani coughed and nodded. Lani stood there for a moment confused about what he should do. The first time they had met he had run in the other direction, now he wasn’t sure what to do. He glanced down the street to see the lights of the bus rounding the corner. “Yeah, this is my bus…” He gestured toward the bus and with the same gesture he gave a little wave, “Later.”

He turned away quickly and made an act of pulling out his bus pass to give off the illusion that he was more focused on that than anything else. Lani didn’t raise his eyes again until he was on the bus, he’d purposefully picked a seat on the side he wouldn’t be tempted to look back for Odion. With a swift motion he placed his headphones in his ears and let the music take him away. It was perhaps the longest bus ride he’d ever endured. He pulled his hood up over his head face. The bus wasn’t that crowded and Lani sank in his seat and covered his eyes with his hand and struggled against the rising tide. Why did Caroline push him to do this? He hadn’t gotten anywhere and if anything he had pushed Odion farther away. Every time Lani tried to keep Odion at a safe distance he was pushing him a little farther. He bit his lip and quickly changed the song to something a little harsher.