Time Warp: Distractions

[Joshua Bernstein]

November 2010

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Recovering from broken and fractured ribs was a time consuming process. Josh was, to his great distress, house bound for months. Months. He could hardly conceive being away from work for so long; he certainly didn't relish the prospect of remaining in bed while his body healed.

He particularly was displeased because sitting in bed meant he had too much time to think, to dwell on the circumstances that had lead to this position.

In an effort to keep his mind away from that topic he'd taken to reading during his waking hours, which were fewer than he wanted due to drug induced exhaustion. Without the drugs he was in too much pain to sleep at all, though, so he couldn't forego them.

His niece Abigail had sent him some of her favorite books when she'd heard he was indisposed. He was on the one hand touched that she was so considerate.

However, her favorite books were Twilight.

Josh had been vaguely aware of the Twilight phenomenon insofar as it was impossible to be completely ignorant. He knew there had been some criticism but also a great deal of popularity. And he was desperate for anything to keep his mind off the assault.

Which, to be fair, the books succeeded there.

"Sean," the attorney wheezed one evening when his friend came through he bedroom door. "Never allow LC to read these, they glorify obsession and stalking. I can't believe Talia allowed them in her house."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Sean had a lot on his mind these days.

The ever-present threat of M.S.A.D. combined with his preexisting insomnia to keep him awake at night. Unfortunately, sleeping pills were not a long-term solution, as they were habit-forming, and so he only allowed himself to take one on weekends; during the week, he fended for himself.

In addition to that, he had his duties at Hammel, and he had his responsibilities at home.

As a young man, prior to The Break Up, he had often fantasized about life with Josh and about the possible family that they would have.

L.C. was not the child that he had envisioned. Josh sleeping in a separate bedroom, recovering from severe injuries caused by meta-supremacist terrorists was not what he had envisioned. He was happy to care for his friend, had insisted on taking this role, but he wished that it had not been born from necessity. Instead that it had been part and parcel of their domestic routine.

Unfortunately, he could not change the past. If he could, he would have prevented Josh from going into the woods. He certainly would have found a way to prevent Gabriel Underwood from graduating.

The telepath pushed those thoughts from his mind as he brought the tray up to Josh’s bedroom. As with every night, he had prepared the attorney’s supper and his medications, before settling in with him to spend the evening.

L.C. had done her homework, and she was watching television in the den before her scheduled bedtime. That gave them time to talk.

“I’ve heard that,” he remarked, as he crossed the threshold and shut the door behind him. “They’re remarkably popular with some of the students.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

"He watches her in her sleep. I hope none of your students try that on each other."

The attorney winced as he pushed himself into a sitting position in anticipation of supper. Even the delicious smells of Sean's cooking couldn't prevent him from embarking on a rant, however.

"It's not healthy, that sort of intensity. They need to have their own lives. I suppose it isn't surprising with teenagers, though. Everything seems more intense then, but that makes it all the more important to not poison them with depictions of obsession as romance."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Sean set the tray down in Josh’s lap, once his friend had maneuvered himself into a seated position. He had made chicken and potatoes with ratatouille as the second side dish. His experiments with expanding L.C.’s palate were not always successful, since she had been fed so poorly back home, but slowly, he had opened enough of a door. Besides, he liked ratatouille, and it was mushy enough in consistency that it went down easily enough; this was always a concern given Josh’s ribs.

As Josh could not drink for the duration of his recovery, Sean had poured him grape juice. Beside the glass, he had lined up all of the younger man’s pills for the rest of the night.

With the tray steady, he sat down on the other side of the bed. An outside observer might find it a strange arrangement for two men who shared an ostensibly platonic relationship. However, he and the attorney shared a degree of emotional intimacy born from their initial relationship, and which, as a result, made them less concerned about arbitrary boundaries and propriety. In addition to the fact that they were both physical people in their own ways.

The telepath listened as Josh ranted about the books. He agreed with his friend’s assessment; from what he had heard of the books, they glorified abusive relationships and should not be emulated. However, he could not help but marvel at the complete lack of irony or self-awareness that the younger man demonstrated during his rant. “The stalking is independent of the intensity, you know.”

Plenty of people managed intense relationships without stalking their crushes.

[Joshua Bernstein]

Josh blinked at Sean slowly. He wasn't entirely sure that he understood the point his friend was trying to make, but he wasn't sure if that was the medicinal haze he was currently living in or simply his own inability.

He opted to turn his attention to dinner, instead.

"It looks wonderful."

In the immediate aftermath of his trauma his diet had been me severely restricted, and although he still had difficulty with swallowing certain foods he was glad at least that he wasn't on a liquid diet.

He began with his pills, so as not to forget (although really how could he?) and then continued on his rant.

"I wouldn't want to be in a relationship like that, revolving around the other person. I suppose it's a good thing I'm single, with the popularity of this...this...propaganda...it almost seems like I'm the only person who feels that way."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Being friends with Josh increased one’s tolerance for intense rants. They proved impossible to escape, since merely being in the attorney’s presence for long enough, irrespective of any emotional connection, inevitably exposed a person to at least one rant, if not more.

Fortunately, Sean was a patient man. It also helped that, at times, he found the younger man’s passion endearing.

The telepath remained on standby, prepared to help his friend with pills. When Josh swallowed them without incident, he relaxed a bit.

“Thank you.” He smiled at the compliment. Although the attorney often complimented his cooking (and, more perplexingly, viewed basic meal preparation as a superpower on par with Sean’s telepathy at times), he appreciated hearing it each and every time.

Yet, the younger man had only begun to eat when he returned the topic of conversation to Twilight.

Lack of self-awareness aside, the telepath hardly blamed his friend for focusing on this. Without work, without regular access to his family or to most of his social circle, and floating between consciousness and sleep while coping with constant pain, Josh had so little on which to focus his attention. The books, as distressing as they were, provided him with that much, and thus, of course, he would want to share those opinions and experiences.

“I don’t think that you’re the only person who feels that way,” the telepath quickly informed the other man. “I don’t think that they’re being held up by most of society as a perfect relationship model.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

"Aren't they marketed as romance novels?" Josh queried as he roughly forked his chicken. "I've heard that people are saying this is romantic and they're so in love and Edward clearly just wants what's best for Bella."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“They’re marketed as young adult supernatural romance, I think.” That was not a genre that Sean read of his own volition. However, working at a high school like Hammel ensured that he had some passing familiarity with the genre, and that was before one added in the additional degree of knowledge and intimacy provided by his telepathy.

Inwardly, he hoped that this rant would invigorate his friend, rather than cause undue stress on his recovery. It could be difficult to predict where Josh was involved.

“People excusing Edward’s abusive behavior are clearly wrong.” Although the psychiatrist wondered where his friend had heard this, given that he was housebound. Perhaps he could try to find the younger man a hobby, since browsing the Internet for whatever Josh had found was clearly not the greatest use of time. “They also lack life experience, for better or for worse.”

For better, as it indicated that such people would mature and learn better, perhaps looking back on these opinions with the embarrassment that only hindsight could provide. For worse because they were vulnerable now, and someone manipulative or abusive might take advantage of that, without them realizing. This was one of the reasons that Sean took his sexual education duties as seriously as he did, and why he tried to provide encompassing information.

[Joshua Bernstein]

"See? Romance. And for teenagers."

Josh waved a speared piece of chicken in Sean's direction.

"I can only hope Abby doesn't take this to heart. Next you know, some boy will be following her around like a lovesick puppy and she'll think it's endearing and let him."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

Sean had already both corrected and conceded the genre, and, as such, he would allow that particular aspect to slip by for now.

Instead, he focused on the rest of Josh’s remarks. “Wouldn’t Talia or David involve themselves in that situation?”

The telepath was not a parent. The closest he had to parenting experience was his current arrangement with L.C., followed by his relationship with his nephew, his experience babysitting children in the neighborhood, and his job and volunteering with teenagers. As he had no direct parenting experience, he could not say definitively what he would and would not do in a given situation. However, he had opinions nevertheless.

He believed that it was important for teenagers who had the inclination to explore relationships with other teenagers. He believed that overprotective parents who would not allow any such avenues did their children a disservice at best and created lasting social and emotional damage at worst (and sometimes resulted in larger familial rifts).

At the same time, he believed that parents should step in to provide appropriate context and relationship models for their children. Otherwise, teenagers learned from other, more harmful avenues, such as this book series. It was why he tried to be a resource to anyone who had questions.

[Joshua Bernstein]

"I suppose," Josh mumbled through a mouthful of ratatouille. Sean was, as usual, correct about that, but plenty of parents cared dearly about their children and yet still those children ended up manipulated and abused. He didn't think his concern was unwarranted, regardless of what his sister and brother-in-law would do.

Besides, they had let the book in the house. Further, they had allowed Abby to mail him copies.

He swallowed, then added, "Its popularity is still troubling."

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“The popularity reflects how we’ve failed as a society,” Sean replied. That was a strong sentiment, the type for which he might hold his tongue in mixed company, but Josh knew him, and he knew Josh. As he told everyone, they were closer than brothers, and he could share his true opinions.

The telepath did not believe that Twilight signaled the downfall of society, as some had declared regarding the Harry Potter books and rock and roll and countless other aspects of popular culture. Instead, he considered it to reflect society’s failures insofar as it obviously tapped into a well of repression and need within various adolescent communities.

While Sean had not read the books himself, he knew a little bit of backstory about the author. He knew that she was Mormon, and that those religious themes and beliefs played a role in the books. Most people did not know how to find them, but they were supposedly there.

The telepath shook his head to himself. “If we did a better job providing teenagers with healthy models, and if we didn’t spend so much time, effort, and money shaming adolescent sexuality and development, we wouldn’t have books like this.” Of that, he was certain.

[Joshua Bernstein]

Josh took a sip of his juice while Sean expressed his opinions. There were no surprises there, but he didn't need surprises; merely reiterating their agreement was a method of emotional bonding.

"Yes, but it's not that easy. The adults doing the shaming were shamed when they were adolescents, and it's hard to break that cycle."

He had some experience there, although his parents didn't realize that they had engaged in shaming.

[Dr. Sean Neville]

“I know.”

Sean had been raised Catholic. There needed be no further case studies on shaming of adolescent development than the Roman Catholic Church, particularly mixed with the unhealthy, regressive social attitudes of the 1950s and early 1960s, in which Sean had been at his most vulnerable (albeit also in pre-adolescence).

Masturbation was sinful. Any permutation of homosexuality (or non-heterosexuality) was sinful. Premarital sex was sinful. Extramartial sex was sinful, even with the consent of all parties involved. All forms of sodomy were sinful, even when performed between married spouses. Birth control was sinful. Pornography was sinful. Even fantasizing too much was sinful.

Then Sean had grown up to be a bisexual, unmarried atheist who had had more sexual partners than he would admit to the students (in terms of providing a solid number). He was not ashamed, but he believed in professional boundaries.

His sister had absorbed far more than he had, because she had not been a telepath, and because she was a woman. “It can be hard to break the cycle, and I don’t fault other adults in our generation or in our parents’ generation for beginning it, since they didn’t.”

That was obvious.

“We still owe it to future generations to end it and do better.”

[Joshua Bernstein]

Josh didn't disagree with Sean's assessment. How often had he argued with other people that it's just how their generation is was a poor excuse for bigoted and shaming behavior? More often than he wished necessary.

"You're right."

He prodded some more at his dinner, smooshing it around his plate. "It would help if the publishing industry would reject this refuse in the first place."