Déjà vu [Karalie]

[Lucas Blacke]

It had been a good few days since hunger had really set in for him due to the situation he was in. Stress eating didn't quite get him as much as he once thought and because barely trained these days he didn't have all that much need for meals, he just kept eating random easy made snacks from the supermarket. Though doing this cost a bit more than expected, so he knew that sooner or later he'd be forced to eat Hammel food.

So when he finally did get hungry he hesitated to go for the cafeteria, not because anything bad happened there but because he'd possibly encounter someone he didn't want to see. And when he set a single foot in the direction of the cafeteria he felt his eyes shooting across the room to scan for any people he wanted to avoid. If there were any in there he'd need to keep an even lower profile than normal since.. well, he didn't know if it was allowed to take cafeteria stuff up to your dorm.

Luckily he didn't see anyone worth avoiding, though he did spot someone he got mixed feelings about since a certain someone told him something pertaining to her, the one he noticed he had been staring at. Luckily she hadn't been staring back as far as Luke knew, and so he quickly turned his head and grabbed a tray to get some food. Though he wasn't as hungry now as the moment he set foot in the cafeteria he still smacked some lettuce onto his plate and a few carrots just to have something to nibble on when killing the time.

Or not. He had turned around to go find a table and suddenly felt nervous, though he didn't show it in anyway and knew he needed to face it head on. No use running from the past, right?

He took a seat after he had put his platter down, someone was already sitting at the table but Luke didn't manage to ask if the seat was taken. It looked empty anyway, so he sat down.

''Remember the first time we were here?''

[Karalie Heise]

I It had been a long day and Karalie had way too much to do. The only problem with school was the stupid amount of school work that came with it. She had a geometry test and chemistry test to study for, a paper due in world history and on top of that she was behind in her readings for English. That on top of homework from her other classes made this semester take off to a poor start. At least it kept her occupied while waiting for the college applications to return. She was hoping for some letters in the coming weeks, but none had arrived just yet.

Though Karalie didn't often like to eat alone, she made an exception tonight. With the pile of schoolwork she really had no time to fool around unless she wanted to be up all night, and she was not going to miss The Bachelor! Her chem notes were propped open as she pushed a piece of chicken into her mouth, feeling someone sit at the table she was at before looking up.

That was the last voice she expected to hear, and her dark eyes trailed away from her neat handwriting to look up at the boy across from her. Was he seriously approaching her after the way they had ended things? Would he try fighting with her again? "There are plenty've days I wish I could ferget." She drawled with her fake smile plastered on her face. Karalie folded her hands and looked across at Luke the same way her momma looked at the nasty old biddy from church who liked to complain too much; with forced kindness. "Now what can I do ya'll for, Lucas?" She asked raising a brow as if she might somehow care.

[Lucas Blacke]

He decided to go ham on a carrot for now, leaning back and trying to casually crunch his way through while trying not to take anything being said too serious. Not that what was said could be seen as incriminating, but it didn't hurt to be a bit lenient towards the whole thing. Besides, a certain someone told him he never loved her in the first place, so why should he care as if he was?

This had been a frequent question as of late, and though he did have an answer he did not give it himself almost as though he liked the pain this whole situation was putting him through. And it was odd enough he felt like he did near her because he had plenty of other friends, no need to bet it all on one horse right? But for some reason.. he just didn't know. He could try being all casual and relaxed with a carrot wedged between his lips and taking bites from time to time, but the feeling was very much present. He felt weird around her, and for some reason the good kind of weird. He knew there was no hope for them, even the idea of a normal friendship was a farfetched one now, but that didn't keep him from trying.

He scoured his brain for a fitting answer, and found himself tempted to go for a smartass comment, see if she could handle something like that now. It should, really, Luke had let go of the past so why couldn't she? As he reached for the carrot in his mouth he glanced along his own hand, and then hers. Oh right, she lived in the past. Her ability did make it worse than it should be, he felt. But on the other hand he had never cheated on someone before, so maybe this was a valid response and could last all the way through school.

He shrugged her comment about forgetting off with a simple raise of his shoulders.

''Ya can talk to me about stuff other than how I fucked up.'' He lied partially, while she was free to discuss anything she pleased with him he just really wanted to hear her voice. Oddly enough she had never left his mind..

''That's a bit much for the start of the year, ain't it?'' He said as he eyed he single book in front of her. In Luke's world, everything pertaining to school was too much.

[Karalie Heise]

She felt herself tense up at his suggestion.  She hated how Luke simply brushed off what he did as this one tiny little fuck up.  Did he not realize how completely massive it was? Sure, it would be terrible for most girls, but in their situation it was even worse.  They were supposed to be saving themselves for each other.  It wasn't like she was sleeping around with her own set of guys, she was still very much a virgin and she had loved that Lucas was as well.  Now he was corrupted.  He ruined their relationship and his virtue all at the same time.  She couldn't, and wouldn't, so easily forget how hurtful that was.  She wasn't worth waiting for.  She wasn't worth anything to him.

"Well, some've us actually care 'bout our futures, Lucas." She corrected, turning back to her notes, deciding they were more important than the boy in front of her.  Didn't he know how much it hurt to be so close? Didn't he know how much she missed him? She hated how much she did, hated how much he still impacted her.  Lucas would definitely be the end of her.  "Is there somethin' ya'll wanted?" She asked, keeping those dark eyes from his.  She couldn't bear to look at them now.

[Lucas Blacke]

She said that like he didn't care about his future, and she was wrong. He did care though maybe not in ther way she had meant it. She tried to get him to think of his future more and more but the obvious thought she had was that more school was equal to a bright future. There were a few examples on why Luke felt that was wrong. He felt that a good future was all in being happy, and that who was in your future made it more worthwhile. No, school was just a socializing place for Lucas.

He had tried seeing things her way but simply wasn't able to maintain that view for long, living in the now was more important to him than living in the then. And while this wasn't always the case for him with him clinging to most faults he had made he still felt he was on solid ground.

''Yer right.'' He began as he took another bite of his carrot. ''I don't really care 'bout my future. I care 'bout what happens today instead of fixatin' on tomorrow.'' He leaned back and smiled as he took the carrot out of his mouth and pointed it at the girl, apparently figuring that school was more important than him. Hint received. ''But I guess livin' in the past does that to ya.''

''What I want?'' He finally repeated. ''I wanna see if we can have a normal converstion without one of us breakin' down.'' He leaned in to her a bit and jokingly added ''An' we both know I'm the weak one 'ere.'' The minute he had said that he wished he didn't, it'd open up a possibility of her talking about, well, the past. His past.

[Karalie Heise]

She wondered what his point was coming over there.  Whatever it was, she wished he would hurry up and get to it so she could get back to her meal and her studies in peace.  She didn't need Luke sitting there reminding her how she lived in the past.  It wasn't exactly like she could escape it, unlike so many people, Luke especially.  With a past like his, she could see why the future was more important.  It had nothing to do with where he came from and all about what he did now to get there.  For Karalie it simply was, and forever would, be different.  She was constantly reminded of the past, and not even just her own.  Memories from decades past haunted her mind all the time, and though she could suppress most on a daily basis, it had surely helped shape who she was on some level.

Finally he made it clear what he wanted.  Sort of.  A conversation without one of them blowing up, which Karalie wasn't entirely convinced could happen.  At least he was able to admit that he was a bigger part of the problem.  Whenever the blowing up had been on her end as of late, it was due to his actions.  Lucas didn't deserve a civil conversation with her, and if she gave him one it was simply out of kind generosity.

"Uh conversation 'bout what, exactly?" She asked, not daring to sound all that curious as she grabbed her iced tea and took a drink, her eyes remaining in her book to make it clear their conversation wasn't as important as what she'd been doing before he'd come to bother her.

[Lucas Blacke]

Swas making it obvious that she didn't really want to talk to him, singular questions, quick slow responses while constantly throwing the ball in his court so that she didn't have to respond as much. And on top of that she seemed to ignore just about everything else he said. Right now a half-eaten carrot held more interest than having a conversation did, so why was he even trying? The only thing he could really come up with at the moment was that he at least owed her this.

While he'd specifically said he didn't want to talk about their past he found it curious that she didn't rip on him or tried to make him feel bad. Perhaps this was a step in the right direction.

But that did not take away from the fact that she was very nearly blowing him off, and with the way Lucas had always been she would have to know this. So what kept him here, thinking all this over? ''How was spendin' time with yer family?'' He asked as he took the carrot in his mouth and bit off a chunk, hoping this question would get something of a response out of her. But in the off chance it didn't, this certainly would.

''Didya tell them 'bout yer power?''

[Karalie Heise]

The question about her family threw her off, and though at first it seemed innocent enough, she knew there was going to be more to it.  Lucas had wanted her to out herself to her entire family, something she had denied, with good reason, while they were together.  It wasn't until after they had broken up that she had really considered telling her extended family what she was.  In fact, when she'd gone home for Christmas she had every intention of doing exactly what she told Lucas she never could, only to have her plans ruined by an extraordinary present; a car.  It was the modern, teenage version of hush money.  As long as she had that car, she was expected to do one thing; keep that pretty little trap closed.  

When Lucas went on to ask if she had, in fact, told the family, she wasn't really all that surprised.  It was a touchy subject and he knew it as well as she did.  Did he honestly think they could sit there and have a casual conversation about it without either of them, her namely, getting angry in the end?

"If ya'll are aimin' tuh have a decent conversation, I would stick tuh neutral conversation topics, Lucas." She grumbled, making it clear to stay away from anything that could be controversial.  She wasn't in the mood to fight, or to discuss what she chose to and not to tell the people that surrounded her.  Coming from a family that hated him, she didn't expect Lucas to understand.  She had far more to lose than he did.  A full ride to college, a car, a slew of family she actually gave a shit about even if they would hate her if they knew..  Too much was at stake, and in the end she was sort of glad the car kept her mouth shut a little longer.  She hated the lies, but she hated the idea of being so alone more while she was feeling already so vulnerable.  

"My family affairs are none've yer concern."

[Lucas Blacke]

His question about how her break with her family was was rejected, he'd be lying if he said he didn't see that one coming and really, he hadn't wielded any high hopes when he asked it. He couldn't care less about her family right now, he was caring for her, and that was it as there was no need to care any further than that. She made it clear they wouldn't be a thing anymore, and whether that actually was true or something odd would happen in the future wouldn't change anything. His question was more of the poke and prod variety and maybe a bit because he figured showing, or even feigning some intertest was the way to go.

But she didn't do the same, so why should he? ''Right enough, yer family is none of my concern.'' He replied finally as he took another bite of the carrot, making sure it crunched as loud as possible. ''But at least I care enough to ask, an' if that don't mean somethin'..''

He waved his half-carrot around in a circular motion and smiled. ''That pretty much tells me all I need to know.'' He swallowed a piece of carrot and sat back. '''Cause I know there's somethin' in there still, an' even with my fuckup in play that shouldn't be so easily erased. So I'm gonna go ahead and assume this is somethin' yer not just hidin' from me, but from people in general.''

He was talking about the one thing he didn't want them to talk about, or so he said. But most of the paths he took conversation wise would lead back to it anyway, he realized sadly. ''So what'd ya get? I mean, they must've silenced ya somehow.''

[Karalie Heise]

It didn't mean anything as far as she was concerned.  Lucas wasn't asking because he cared, he was asking because he wanted to pick a fight with her.  She knew he wanted her to come clean to her aunts and uncles and grandparents, and he would say so the second she answered his stupid questions.  They didn't come from a place of concern and she was wise enough to see that now.  He was trying to drag her down and there was a time she may have been alright with that, but now.. Now things were different.  She knew his intentions weren't honorable.  He'd proven it.

She wondered if there was a point behind him actually telling her things she already knew.  She decided for now it was wiser to bite her tongue than to walk willingly into his trap.  She wasn't interested in making a scene and she could see that this was slowly coming to that.  He wanted her to freak out.  He wanted her to come undone again.  Did he truly enjoy seeing it?

It was his final statement that drove her close enough to the edge to actually answer him.  He was insinuating that they gave her something to shut her up.  It didn't matte if he was right or not, she didn't think it was his business.  Especially now considering their positions in each others lives.  "Do ya'll have anythin' yah'd actually like tuh talk tuh me about that concerns you? Cause I think I've made it pretty damn clear I wasn' interested in talkin' 'bout this.  Especially with you."  She was talking faster with her annoyance, her hands curling into fists as a defense mechanism from drawing random memories from anything she might actually touch.  

If he was too dense to get the message now, she would have no choice but to just leave him there.  This wasn't idle conversation, this was making things worse than they already were.

[Lucas Blacke]

Things were pretty clear as to why he was doing this. He'd been asking him the simple question to that a few times over and had finally gotten the answer just by listening to the response he was given. Seeing someone else get angry was smile-worthy to him, a reminder that he wasn't the only one who had limits. Still, with her specifically talking about him it added a certain.. kick.

''Ya have.'' He responded with a nod when she said she'd made it clear she didn't want to talk about the topic he had started. But did her warnings, or any warning for that matter keep him from doing anything? It did not. His experience had told him it was about 50/50 when it came to how things turned out and as Luke was he would just fix that by expecting the worst. Less disappointment, less reason to try and fix things instead of making them worse. And now, now Karalie had ended up at that station where he just tried to break her to make himself feel better.

And it was working.

''Defensive lil' minx ya are.'' He said with a smile. ''Means I hit a string, didn't I?'' None of what he did at this time meant he didn't hope they'd somehow end up together again, but Luke had a limit and that limit was a very small drive away.

He sighed as he leaned back and took another bite of his carrot, chewing hesitantly as he kept eyeing her, doubt clouded his mind as he thought of what he should say next. She wanted it to be about him, or rather she wanted it to not be about her. He wondered, he did have something to say but.. was she worth opening up to? Again? Couldn't hurt to give her some more ammo either way.

''Maybe, just maybe I'm pullin' this shit to get ya down to my level. Make it easier for me to cope that yer gone, y'know?''

[Karalie Heise]

Minx? Since when did Lucas use pet names like minx? And why was her calling her one.  Her teeth clenched tight and her body grew tense as she fought to keep it together.  There were too many nasty things she would have liked to say to him, so many names that might cut him down, but she tried to reassure herself that she was, in fact, the bigger person here.  For now.  For now she was bigger, but that wasn't going to last forever, not with the way he was going.  

And that's when Lucas crossed the line.  When she thought that maybe he'd finally gotten it through his thick mind that she wasn't going to sit there and take his shit, he pulled out the big guns.  He was trying to cut her down to his level so that he could cope that she was gone.  Was he serious? She had to laugh as she looked up at him.  "Seriously? Yer un-freakin'-believable, yah know that?" She shook her head and shut her book, beginning the process of packing her things up.  She didn't have to deal with this.  There were so many other places she could sit and study that wouldn't have annoying ex boyfriends hanging around.

"Don'tchu think you've cut me down enough, Lucas? I didn' screw this up. I didn' go divin' between th'first set uh legs spread for me.  I didn' hurtcha, Lucas. I didn' do anything!"  She reminded, disgusted with the way he was punishing her for his own stupidity.  "If ya'll are havin' trouble copin' go see uh freakin' head doctor, or better yet do us all a damn favor an' go suck down uh bottle've rat poison.  I don' care whatchu do, but leave me alone unless ya'll can act like uh civilized human bein', somethin' I'm beginnin' tuh doubt yer actually capable of."  With that she got up, grabbing the last of her books.  If he couldn't treat her with respect, then she didn't want to be around him at all.