Long Time No See (Zach)

[Carleigh Davidson]

The campus tour had finished about fifteen minutes ago. Usually, a group of high school seniors would find purpose in this event. Feel more assured and confident about their decisions of what university and what field to pursue a degree in. Talk about their plans and what classes caught their interest in an excited buzz. That's exactly what happened as everyone made their way down the corridors of the University of Vermont, except for one person.

There was an hour long break for lunch and looking around the university freely. Almost immediately, Carleigh separated herself from the group. For once, she felt uncomfortable with her peers, all who had plans for their future. Career goals. A major and a minor in mind.

Meanwhile, she didn't even know if she was going to university or college after graduation. It was a concept, something she should have looked into but was undecided. No career plans. No idea where to even start. Carleigh let out a frustrated sigh, as she continued to roam around the campus by herself. It didn't bother her for the time being; afterall, it gave her time to think to herself. The more she thought about it, the more the blonde was thinking about taking a year off. Work, or travel, or something.

After a few minutes of walking, Carleigh found herself in front of the doors of the library. The tour guide had only shown them the outside of the building and said a few rehearsed facts about the university's library. She wanted to see inside. Opening the doors, the blonde was hit with the smell of old books and lingering coffee. A distinct, university smell. She kept to herself, walking around as blue eyes scanned the room. They landed on one student, sitting by himself. A little unkept. She almost walked by until a closer look made Carleigh realize she knew him. From the summer trip with Sera and her friends and family.

Her pace quickened. Carleigh sat down at the chair opposite of him, clearing her throat to grab his attention. "Zach, right? I remember you." She said, always one to launch right into conversation. She just hoped he remembered her, or else it would be a little... awkward.

[Deleted]

There was a writing project that Zach needed to complete quickly. He’d gotten behind on his work, and now was in a rush to get it done. Zach disliked how he was still having issues concentrating on his schoolwork. He’d hoped that after the holidays, spending so much time with Kai, and just by time passing overall that he would have been fine and back to normal by now. That was too much to hope for. At least he didn’t have to walk far once classes were over to a place he felt…safe…

Pathetic…he was still so pathetic…

How was he going to get this stuff done when he found himself staring off into space so often? Zach hadn’t even been doing his recreational on-line writing(the stuff that Kai always bugged Zach to let him read). At least he was able to keep up with work well enough.

Zach finally got to typing away on his laptop. A whole sentence. Then two. And then half of a third when his muse was interrupted by a familiar, yet unfamiliar, voice. “Huh?” Zach looked up, confused, at the blonde who was suddenly speaking to him. Who was this? She looked….familiar. Yes, he had seen her before, right? Yes, on the camping trip! And her name was…what was it again…? “Carmen…” he guessed, pointing a finger hesitantly. “Right?” Wrong.

[Carleigh Davidson]

The thought hadn't occurred to Carleigh that maybe he wanted to be left alone. Afterall, he was in the library, and usually, students there wanted to get through their work and not be bothered. Especially by a chatty high school student. She pulled the chair forward, resting both arms on top of the table with a soft and slightly apprehensive smile.

The trip felt like it happened years ago. There were undeniably tense moments between Sera's group of friends and Kai's. Sera and Alice didn't seem to approve of Zach or his other friend she didn't talk to. The one with the baby. Throughout the trip, Carleigh kept mostly to herself or with the two other girls, not bothering to try and reach out to the other group. She still had a good time overall, but wished that things weren't so... awkward.

She chewed on her bottom lip, fiddling with a silver ring on her thumb. A flash of recognition crossed his face, but guessed her name wrong. Carleigh's lips pulled into a small smile, shaking her head back and forth. "No, close. Carleigh." The blonde re-introduced herself. "Hope I'm not interrupting anything huge here, but it's been awhile." Since the summer. Truth be told, she didn't even know if she'd see him or anyone else besides Sera from that trip again.

[Deleted]

Zach remembered her from the camping trip, of course. He remembered thinking how could a sweet girl like her be friends with such harpies like Alice and Sera. And feeling bad that she had somehow gotten mixed up with all of their drama by mistake. He also remembered thinking that maybe her innocence was only skin deep and she was secretly really like those two after all, and was just better at hiding it than them. Which wasn’t fair, he knew, but considering the company she kept.

It made Zach a bit wary of her upon this meeting here, but since he had no real reason to dislike her, Zach could manage to be friendly. Bah, what was he thinking? Zach was always friendly. To everyone, except Kai. Kai could go trip into a bramble-patch somewhere.

Still….one would thing…well, no, Zach was pretty bad at remembering names to begin with. This had happened more than a few times. Despite that, he still flushed with embarrassment at having got it wrong. “Sorry….I’m terrible with names,” he explained. Zach shook his head. “Not really…I mean, I am studying, but…I can afford a break right about now.” Hopefully. Breaks were good, though. He often forgot to take them.

[Carleigh Davidson]

Carleigh had kept her distance from the drama, or at least, she tried to. She kept away the few times the groups had mingled, keeping to her social circle or to herself. She never realized how tense things would be, agreeing to the trip because Sera was her friend and wanted her to go. Needless to say, Carleigh felt relieved when it ended and they returned to their own respective lives. A little less strained and tense; she felt like she could breathe again.

"It's okay." She smiled, to assure Zach that she wasn't upset. They hadn't spoken to each much, and so, she didn't expect him to remember her name the way she had. Names came easy to the blonde.

Glancing up at the time, Carleigh figured she'd have enough time to talk to him for a bit before returning to the group. "If you insist. I can go." She added quickly. He just had to say the word, and she would leave. From experience, Carleigh hated holding a conversation with someone who clearly wasn't interested or had other things to do. "What are you working on over there?" She asked, gesturing with her head towards his laptop. Homework, presumably. But she was curious and hoped it would reveal something more about him. All Carleigh knew was from Sera and Alice, who likely had a bias, and her minimal observations.

[Deleted]

“Um…no! It’s okay, I’m not….that…busy…” Well…he was…sort of…. he looked at his ‘work’ on his computer screen. Two and a half sentences, great progress Zach, just a million more to go. But Zach would feel horrible about shooing her away when they just met again….yeah, when these two people who barely knew each other and had no real reason to associate with each other had happened upon each other by accident at the library. That was obviously more important than whatever it was he was working on.

Zach was just looking for an excuse to procrastinate more, and Carleigh had given him the perfect excuse to do so. He looked to the screen when she asked about his work. “Um….this is….” Something….barely something. “Just a writing assignment.” That was due later this week. Looked like he wasn’t going to be getting any sleep tonight. Or tomorrow. Kai was probably going to get on his case about that, and for ignoring him, but priorities. That’s why Zach was at the library in the first place, so Kai wouldn’t be there to pester him.

“Y-you’re here….for the tours, right? The high school ones?” They always started those around this time of year. The campus was littered with kids barely old enough to vote, if that at all. “Are you, um…coming here? In the fall?” Zach was trying to move the conversation away from himself and his assignment that he was already sick of doing.

[Carleigh Davidson]

Carleigh sensed the hesitation in his voice, but didn't say anything about it. It was his choice, afterall. Besides, she wouldn't be around for a really long time. The tour group would probably start looking for her after the lunch break ended. Then he could return to his assignment without bothering him with her presence. Was she even bothering him? The blonde couldn't answer.

A writing assignment. She nodded. "Gotcha. You like writing?" The small talk was just that; small talk, but it was hard to think of something to talk about between two strangers. Had Carleigh not found him here in the library while wandering on her own, she likely never would have seen him again.

"Yeah, I am. The campus tours. I got bored though and decided to wander around on my own." They'd been walking around the same hallway, not really going in depth. Their tour leader stuck to the main paths and gave only a brief glance as to life on campus. Then again, there was a limited time frame to work with. Shrugging, the blonde answered "Maybe. I'm not really sure if I want to go to school right away..." She trailed off, fiddling with her silver ring.

[Deleted]

Zach remembered those high school tours, having been in one himself prior to entering the university, and then from subsequent years afterwards. The campus was always littered with high school seniors….kids really…and not a one of them knew how to not act like kids. It was like babysitting his family times ten. Or a hundred.

Carleigh didn’t seem to fit the stereotype, at least. Or she hadn’t so far. She was friendly, outgoing, but not the kind of annoying bouncing off the walls like of extrovert that many incoming freshmen were like before they realized that this was a university, not a party hall. Zach smiled a flat kind of smile and nodded. “Yeah, uh…it’s kinda…well I majored in it, if that tells you anything.” Zach liked writing a lot…he’d just been having trouble keeping up his will to write recently. It was getting better, but still far from recovered.

She got bored? Zach chuckled softly. “Yeah…I did too, back when I was…” He waved his hand, as if to indicate the past, when he was in her position. He made a slightly confused face at her admission, however. “No? Why not?” Zach wasn’t going to judge her for it, of course, but he did worry about some of the reasons why teens would choose to not go to college right away or at all. “Sorry, I’m just curious….it’s hard to get back into academia once you take a break from it, so guess I’m just…” Worried? Maybe. If he could help, then he would. It was certainly a lot more interesting than doing homework right now.

[Carleigh Davidson]

The tour had been exactly how Zach described it; high energy kids buzzing with excitement at the future, talking about their goals and their dreams and how they were gonna make the Dean's list and graduate with high grades. It was in that moment Carleigh grew quiet, lingering near the back, hoping nobody asked her about what she wanted. What her aspirations were. Because at this point, she had none.

It was overwhelming. But she put on a brave face.

"Oh okay, I see." She answered with a few, quick nods. "That sounds hard. A lot of essays and stuff." Carleigh added. At least he enjoyed the work. One reason why she was so hesitant to go to university, or even college, was because she didn't know what direction to go in. There were general education classes she could take, and hopefully would find her niche. The thought of more school was a lot to bear, though. "It's okay." The blonde accepted his apology, not hurt or offended by the question. It was natural; afterall, why was she on a campus tour if she wasn't sure about her future plans?

"I've heard that too." Carleigh's features grew serious. A taste of life free from homework and uncomfortable chairs in lecture halls and most never returned. "I guess I just want to think about my choices, and stuff. I don't really have a good idea or what I like or what I'm good at." Take some time to figure herself out, if that was even a thing.

[Deleted]

Zach shrugged with a flat smile. It was hard, yes…but if he didn’t enjoy it he wouldn’t have chosen it for his major. Though recently, it’d been a lot harder than it should have been. “It is, but…once you get used to it….well, doing so much writing, you kinda learn how to do it…even if you don’t want to…” He’d engaged in exercises like that before; learning how to write when there was no muse to write from. And learning how to do it well. Because when you were a novelist, there were deadlines just like with everything else, and you didn’t always have the luxury of waiting until you ‘felt like it’. Zach used to be really good at that, and could jam out something half-decent from nothing…

Not he could barely get three sentences written.

The longer this slump of his went on, the lower his spirits became, and the lower his spirits became, the more it seemed like he was never going to get out of it. Zach just…needed something to inspire him. Something big. Something….that stimulated him. That jumpstarted him into a writing frenzy, and once he got it going, Zach was never going to stop, ever! Well, he’d have to for food and sleep, but….and maybe…with Kai….but otherwise….

Anyway….

“That can be hard,” he said with a slow nod. “A lot of students just out of high school don’t know what they’re doing. Then they choose something on impulse because the pressures that….well, it’s kinda assumed that if you go to college, then you have to know where you’re going and what you’re studying.” Zach shook his head and offered a softer smile. “That’s not true, though. These things take time, and some people….they take a long time to figure it out.” Hopefully that was encouraging. Zach stretched his arms out in front of him on the table. They’d grown stiff from sitting at the computer for so long. “But….if you can go to college, even if it’s just community college, then I encourage it….even if you’re just…going half time and taking generic classes.” In a way, Carleigh reminded him of Jen, and how she was working through that journey of self-discovery. The thought made him smile again.

[Carleigh Davidson]

"That's always what I found difficult, writing when I didn't want to." Then Carleigh would get distracted by Facebook or other social media sites and then four hours later, she had nothing written on the page. Thankfully, she didn't find it necessary to sleep much and had a bit more time to complete her procrastinated work.

"Exactly, and I don't want to waste my time taking a bunch of classes that I may not even enjoy. I'm all for trying out new things but... yeah." Carleigh started rambling, exhaling a soft sigh. Why was life so hard? All these decisions to make and she wasn't even eighteen yet. "I was just gonna choose my best subject and school and go with that, if I do decide to go."

The words Zach offered were mildly reassuring to the blonde. Hearing that from someone who lived through the experience; who had a sense of direction now but maybe once had been just as confused as she was. The smile on Carleigh's face perked up a little. Time. It took time. She didn't have to know what she wanted, but the pressure was still there.

"Yeah, maybe. Community college is less expensive than the university, anyway." Although money was never an issue growing up for the blonde, it was pointless wasting it on classes she was just trying out for fun. Not to mention, she wanted to grow less dependent on her parents. Which meant getting a job. Carleigh didn't even know where to begin. "Did you start here right away?" She asked him, out of curiosity.

[Deleted]

“That’s….a good way to…a good route,” he said, trying to be encouraging. Going with what she knew she was good at in school already. But… “But….your best subject…..high school only has maybe….six…seven subjects that you study. College….and the university, they have…a lot more than…than just that.” So her best subject, while that might be a good way to go, could also be applied to something else as well. “There’s a lot of different things to try, but…you won’t know if you like them if you don’t do them….I guess…” That was something that Kailin had taught him recently, in her efforts to get her older brother out and about instead of always holed up and anti-social. Zach had stupidly agreed to let her make him do whatever she said.

However, regarding Carleigh, Zach understood that she was still young and it was likely the thought of college, and having to decide between all of the options she had to study, was daunting. Zach had already known what he wanted to do since he was young, before junior high even, but his sister, older brother, younger brother….not everyone in the Bishop family went to college. Kailin, Lani and Katy were on that bridge themselves in figuring out what to do after high school. Zach could help as much as he could, but what they decided to do what ultimately up to them.

It was the same for Carleigh. It was entirely up to her what she wanted to do after high school. But…call him biased, but Zach would always encourage college as high on the list of options. Zach smile and nodded. “It is. And I think Greenview has a good transfer program with the university, so if you decide you want to…” Zach trailed off, assuming she could figure out how it was supposed to end. At the question about himself, Zach looked a bit uncertain about answering. “Uh…yeah, I did. I got in on a scholarship,” he explained. Zach had tried very hard to get into university quickly and to make it as cheap for his parents as possible. As in, they would only have to pay for his rent and living expenses. Having worked so hard, knowing what he wanted to do since he was young, having a plan of action right out of high school….it made him feel like he wasn’t qualified to offer her the advice he’d just given as it contradicted everything he’d done himself. He didn’t know what else to say regarding that so he just stayed silent, trying to think of where to go next in the conversation if Carleigh didn’t pick it up again.

[Carleigh Davidson]

"Which is another thing. There are so many subjects out there that I could be learning about, or could be really good at, and I don't even know it. Like, we should get a little sample in high school, you know? Or on these tours show me all the different subjects instead of wandering around admiring the architecture." Carleigh rambled, unaware of how much pent up frustration she had in her system about the education system. Who would have expected that? "Like, a free trial of what the world has to offer, you know?"

The idea that there was a lot out there that she was unaware of kind of scared the blonde. Not that pride would ever allow her to admit that out loud. Too many options. Too many decisions. The more she thought about, the more tempting taking a year off of school sounded.

"Well, that's good to know for the future at least." Carleigh said with a nod, when Zach mentioned the transfer program Greenview had set up with the university. "Oh, that's good, scholarships are... good." She said, looking over with a smile. It's not like she'd be offered any scholarships with her grades. She didn't even know if she could get into university right away with her grades.

A silence lapsed between them. Her eyes flickered to the laptop sitting in front of him, and then to the clock. "So... about the summer." She started off, wondering if this was even the time or the place to bring up the trip. "Things were pretty awkward hey?" She paused, fiddling with the ring on her thumb. Great conversation starter.

[Deleted]

A sample in high school? Zach pondered over that idea for a brief moment. It was true that there were so many different subject to offer in college compared to high school, and there was very little way for graduating seniors to tell what each one of them entailed without taking the risk of taking the class. “I think….that might actually be a good idea…” So good, in fact….it actually gave him an idea for an article.

“Um….hold on, I need to write this down, otherwise I’ll completely forget later.” Zach turned to his computer real quick and opened up a new word document file. Twenty seconds later, there was more work on the screen than he’d done in the entire time he’d been sitting there trying to get his homework done. “Huh…..sorry!” he said turning back to the blonde. “I just…that’s a really good idea, I thought I might write an article on it or…something…” He blushed and turned his eyes down to the table.

Maybe it could be something like a weekend seminar where they are introduced to each department the university(or college) had to offer and were given in-depth explanations about what classes they had and what could be done with those sorts of degrees once completed? It was an idea, at least, and Zach would have to talk to Jade about publishing the article, but maybe it would inspire….something….something, he didn’t know. “Thanks….sorry, um…”

There was that awkward pause….and that somehow inspired Carleigh to bring up yet another awkward topic. Zach blink up at her, surprised that she brought it up…though he’d be lying if he said it hadn’t been on his mind this entire conversation. “Uh…yeah…they were,” he agreed nervously. “I’m….yah, I’m sorry you got, uh…roped into all of that…crap….” How else was he supposed to put it? “Um…I don’t meant to be, uh….well, how do you know…Kai’s sister?” he asked. “It’s just you don’t seem to be quite as….” Stuck up. Intense. Bitchy. “….as….her…sorry, she’s you’re friend, isn’t she? I shouldn’t be saying such things…” Great job, Zach.

[Carleigh Davidson]

Carleigh's features lit up when Zach mentioned it was a good idea. She wasn't use to hearing that sort of compliment from people, but it was a compliment she genuinely took to heart. It hadn't been an intentional idea, but if it sparked something inside of him, then she was more than happy to help. Sometimes, the students experiencing the changes firsthand was all it took. "Take your time." Carleigh finally replied, before falling into silence. She didn't want to interrupt his work flow.

She was half tempted to stand up and peek around his laptop to see what he was writing, but decided against it, ultimately. "Oh! Thank you." She said, smiling across the table at the older student. When he mentioned an article, she tilted her head to the side with curiosity. "So, do you write for something here or online?" She asked.

Maybe it would help start something useful for students like Carleigh, who were still confused about their future, despite planning for it in school and talking to advisors and school counsellors.

Why did she bring this up now? The summer camping trip had been so long ago that she wondered if it was even relevant anymore. Letting go of her ring, Carleigh let her hands fall on top of the table with a small thud. Zach had agreed that things were awkward, which wasn't too much of a surprise. She figured he'd agree. "No, it's okay. I mean, you didn't really do anything." She said quickly. Everything added up quickly and before Carleigh could even process it, two distinct groups had been created. Not that there hadn't been those groups to begin with but...

Her thoughts trailed off, as Zach asked where she knew Sera from. "Oh, we're classmates at Hammel. We get along." Carleigh added, in a more bubbly tone. "We both kind of liked fashion." Only, Sera was a lot more intense about it. Carleigh just dabbled in fashion trends while her friend completely submerged herself in the world of fabrics and design. Her face fell, upon realization that not everyone had the same sort of bond with her. "It's okay she... can be a hard person to get along with." Blunt; even it was about a friend. "And being around Alice, it just seemed to bring more of that side of her out, you know? Around me, she is fine."

"I was sort of caught off guard too, with everything that happened." Carleigh admitted. Had she known of all the tension, she likely wouldn't have gone.