AU: Inconveniently Horny (Closed)

[Jesse Adams]

Even at the Hammel Institute, Jesse’s current predicament was... well... unique.

It wasn’t often that one came across a baby unicorn. Much less one that had accomplished in getting itself high-centered on top of a bench.

Of all the things in the world the thirteen year old could have shifted into upon manifesting, his genes had fallen into alignment with that of... yeah. A baby unicorn. An adorable, blue eyed, stick legged, stub horned unicorn with an insane amount of hair. Like, Farah Fawcett of the horse world hair. It curled around his face and danced down his neck in annoying ripples and seriously, no matter how many times he tried to have Clement cut it... It. Grew. Back.

It was bad enough being the only mythical creature shifter on the whole damn campus, but what was worse were the girls. He couldn’t go a day without being petted or taken pictures of as he wobbled his way into the grass to wait to shift back. He constantly had people trying to pull tail hairs too, apparently to fuel some sort of Harry Potter fan thing involving wands. That had resulted in a fair few kicks, and multiple detentions.

Plus a handful of lectures from Clement that we do. Not. Kick. Classmates.

The little unicorn snorted in frustration as he once again tried to tip himself either backwards or forwards. Neither way was going to end well, but he had to get down somehow. Why it had been a good idea to try to jump over the bench was long gone now. He just wanted to get down, which meant someone had to help him. That was tricky, as Jesse... wasn’t particularly trusting of most people, and when he was in unicorn form, he was even more nervous. As such, he tended to react to help when he was stuck (which was often) by either kicking or headbutting until he was left alone. It was usually at that point, once his would-be rescuers scattered, that his brother would turn up and untangle him from whatever mess he’d gotten himself into.

It was nothing new, relying on Clement for help. Jesse couldn’t remember anything different growing up. Not with their mom, not with any of the group or foster homes they’d filtered in and out of over the years, and not at Hammel. It was just... normal. Clement had probably been more parent to him than either of theirs had really been. Not that he could really remember that so clearly anymore. Sometimes he’d dream about it, but by the time he woke up whatever scraps his subconscious had held on it had long gone. As much as he could be at odds with his brother, he ultimately did trust and rely on him, no matter what.

That included now. In a last ditch attempt to get himself noticed before he actually killed himself falling off the stupid bench, he sighed and laid back his ears at the sound he let himself make. God, baby unicorns made the most pathetic noises, but he had hope that Clement heard it. If not, well... at least he’d have a good excuse not to have his homework done.

[Clement Evans]

Being Jesse's older brother was a lot like being tethered to an endlessly roaring chainsaw. The kid had every right to be furious with the world and act accordingly, but it made life difficult for everyone, including and especially the little idiot himself and Clement. The elder boy had never been much of a talker, and if a few rounds of requests to act more like a human being and less like an angry bee fell on deaf ears, he stopped repeating himself and let Jess take the consequences. Not that experience was that great a teacher with the kid, but if it went further, Clement just cut himself off and left him alone. A last ditch tactic, but one that worked more often than not. For awhile, anyway.

Growing up, he'd been mom and dad as well as brother, and it wore on him. He'd dealt with all the uncertainty of the drama at home and in the homes by closing himself off, by not letting anyone in. It was too much work, making the effort to be a family with a steady stream of strangers, especially when he had to constantly keep Jesse from stepping too far over a line he was already pretty chummy with. To others he seemed aloof, even cold, and to not have much of a personality. No one really knew what he was into, what he felt, or just what the hell he was thinking. Jesse did, but Clement still kept a few things to himself because sometimes the kid just would not. Shut. Up.

Clement, as it turned out, was also a meta, and manifested shortly after his brother. He was also a shifter, but had a slightly more useful and way less embarrassing form of large black, white, and silver timber wolf. He also had more control over spontaneous shifting than Jesse, who had unicorned out to loud noises. The baby unicorn was kind of cute, he thought, not that he'd say that to Jess. Certainly he was grateful that his bro had a benign power rather than any of the kinetics or manipulators, but even Jesse could take what he'd been given and turn it into a weapon. Clement had a number of very odd looking scars from hooves and tiny horn, and at least three of their Hammel classmates had their own.

So when he heard that oh-so-familiar... well, he didn't want to call it a bleat, but it was barely in the ballpark of a neigh. It was like someone had taken 'MY LIFE IS RUINED' and turned it into a sound. Anyway, he sighed. Still, he was in the middle of math class and the numbers were starting to run together in his brain. A break would technically be very nice, but he'd be dealing with a baby unicorn whose LIFE IS RUINED.

Some kids raised their hands and said 'bathroom' and left. Clement did that, except he said 'unicorn'.

After about five minutes of searching... oh good Christ. Walking around to the unicorn's front, he knelt down, knees cracking - ow - and looked the horned foal in the eyes. He was prudently out of biting/kicking range. "You gonna let me help you or's this gonna end with me not talking to you for a few days?"

The expression he got in reply was one he had previously not thought equine faces capable of.

"Right. Okay, relax. I'm gonna lift 'n slide you. 'F you kick me in the nuts I'm leaving you here."

A few uncomfortable minutes later, Jesse's hooves were on the ground again. Clement didn't ask. Not that he didn't want to know, but if he grilled his brother every time he did something weird he probably would've left him to fend for himself at age six.

Sticking his hands in his jeans pockets, the brunet looked at the baby unicorn. "What now."

[Jesse Adams]

If Jesse was a roaring chainsaw, Clement was... well... about as expressionless and fun as a boulder. As far back as the newly minted teenager could remember, Clement had been the serious one. It didn’t mean he didn’t have feelings or thoughts, he was just... the responsible one, ever since they were very little. He’d always played the babysitter, and eventually, more or less the parent. Even in the foster homes they’d filtered through, Clement was usually the one to wrangle his brother when he was dancing all over the line. As much as he butted heads with his brother, Jesse also trusted him explicitly. Foster parents and their own kids, or other foster kids, had always been kept at an arms’ length, all the while the rules and boundaries contested. But for as much trouble as Jesse liked to cause, he was ten times worse if it was his brother who was threatened. Granted, he was about as threatening as, well, a baby unicorn, but if someone stepped over the line with Clement, Jesse was right there telling them where to go and how to get there.

It was safe to say he’d been threatened with soap in the mouth long before such words should have been integrated into his vocabulary, let alone even known to the blond.

Much like Clement was generally reserved around others, Jesse tended to only show his prickly side to other people. The only person he showed any kind of weakness – whether it was being tired, his joints hurting, or being scared – was his brother. No one else was allowed in, and he preferred it that way. Even when he should have allowed them in. Such as now, when he was stuck with no brother in sight to help.

The rubbing on the bench was starting to hurt his belly as he hung there, still unsure of how to solve the problem himself. Despite the soft, plush fur working as a barrier, that didn’t make it any less uncomfortable. Kicking out his feet again, mostly in frustration, he lowered his head and sighed. Note to self: jumping over benches is never a good idea. Never going to be a good idea. Maybe when he was older. He had all the hope in the world that as he matured as a human, his shifted form would also mature. A big, albeit pretty, unicorn stallion was at least a tiny bit cool. But this whole baby business? Not cool. Especially when he was being dragged around by a big timber wolf. Stupid shifter genes.

After he made the saddest noise he could, Jesse tried rocking again in a last ditch attempt to loosen the bench’s death grip on him before flinching and dropping his head again, ears drooping. Wood sucked to rub against. Little bits kept stabbing him and if he didn’t get rescued soon, he’d probably be full of stupid splinters. One ear flicked in the direction of footsteps, and for a moment the little unicorn froze, legs twisting up in preparation for kicking out. Thankfully, it didn’t come to that. Seeing his brother, a happier little nicker escaped him. He was saved! ... From a very stupid situation, but still. He watched Clement crouch in front of him, keeping his feet tucked up. The question made him pull a face that was a mix of ‘SAVE ME’ and ‘I HATE YOU’ and ‘DON’T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THIS. EVER.’

Letting Clement pick him up in general was awkward, but as a unicorn it was ten times worse. Jesse wiggled on the bench, flinching again at yet another stab at his belly, and tried to his best to go limp as Clement picked him up moved him back to the ground. He didn’t think he’d ever been so happy to touch ground, and would have bucked happily, had his legs actually, you know, worked. Instead he just flicked his tail and stared up at his brother with his obnoxiously blue eyes. What now, exactly, especially when a certain little brother was supposed to be in a class of some kind. Probably. The bench incident had been... unplanned, and now the thirteen year old wasn’t quite sure what time it was, or where he was actually supposed to be.

And just as fast as he’d unicorned earlier, he turned back into his normal, human form. Sans clothes, because how in the hell did you shift with clothes. “Fuck.” No, he was not going to watch his mouth because he was outside and naked. No, not even a thank you, because right now all he wanted was to go back to the dorms and burrow under his blanket, thank you very much. “Dorms. Right now before someone sees.” Now green eyes narrowed slightly as he looked up at his brother. “Don’t ask.” He wasn’t sure he really wanted his brother to know he’d tried jumping the bench in an effort to make his stupid baby unicorn form a sliver cooler.

Speaking of slivers, now the silky fur was gone, Jesse definitely had a couple of them, courtesy of the bench from hell. Right now, however, he was much more concerned with the whole HI WORLD I’M NAKED OUTSIDE situation. Giving Clement a tiny push, Jesse tucked himself behind him as best he could. “Just go.”

[Clement Evans]

A boulder was actually a great thing to be when paired with a chainsaw, so Clement considered it a win. However paltry a win that was, considering his brother's disposition. Clement sometimes wondered where the kid got all his energy; it was pretty exhausting being as pissed off as he was all the time.

Once Jess had his hooves on the ground, his big brother didn't say anything about how he was skipping class, and once he was human again he didn't comment on the language or the sullenness or the lack of gratitude. But god, the kid could be bossy.

"Pushy for a naked dude. Hold on." Stepping as best he could away from the skinny, angry little teenager trying to cower behind him, he slipped off his backpack and dug around in the front pocket. Standing back up, he tossed a red t-shirt at Jesse. The top of his gym outfit, newly laundered, now not going back to his gym locker but to the service of making his brother slightly more civil. It would also cover him up, but that was not a primary, secondary, or even tertiary consideration. The little blond was just as mouthy and violent when he was naked as he was clothed.

Since Clement was bigger, the shirt would cover Jess's unmentionables, but he wasn't too much bigger, so... only just. If the kid had thanked him he would've offered a piggyback ride, but... nope. Slinging his pack back on, he wordlessly started to the dorms.

Once to their rooms, he grabbed Jesse by the sleeve of his shirt. "I wanna see that stomach after you're dressed. I saw blood."

[Jesse Adams]

Oh hell no. Jesse tried his best to follow Clement as he shifted away from him, only to be handed a shirt. “’m not pushy,” he grumbled, but he took the shirt anyway and tugged it on, yanking it down as far as humanly possible. “... Thanks.”

If it made his brother feel any better, Jesse hadn’t meant to skip class. He’d been on a free period when he’d tried the bench stunt, and it wasn’t his fault he’d gotten stuck. Skipping class usually just resulted in another brotherly lecture about how school was important, and all that. (He usually tuned out halfway through.)

Keeping his hands down at the hem of the shirt to keep it down low enough to cover everything, Jesse followed Clement like a puppy back to the dorms. He knew he should have been grateful that it was him that had come to his rescue, and not some creepy teacher he didn’t want touching him. Kicking and headbutting students was one thing, but to do it to a staff member? It was probably more trouble than it was worth.

As soon as they reached their dorms, he was about to take off into his own bedroom when he felt the grab. “No you didn’t,” he protested before scurrying to his room and shoving the door closed behind him. The borrowed shirt was flung at the bed and for a moment he looked at his stomach, wincing because Clement was right. The Bench from Hell had done a number on his skin. It places it was a little raw and pink, but he definitely saw a few splinters. Hedging, he called out to Clement on the other side of the door. ‘’s just kinda pink. No blood.” Because older brothers always believed their younger ones. Now that was clear, Jesse grabbed a plain navy shirt and a pair of jeans. Knowing Clement, he’d probably make another grab for him upon his exit. Well, two could play at that game. Scooping up his bag, Jesse readied himself before flinging the door open and running like hell.

Because he wasn’t bleeding. Or had splinters. Nope.

[Clement Evans]

He wasn't going to argue it, because it was fact. Jesse was almost amusingly commanding for his size, especially when he was younger. And now even when he was naked. With the guy who'd rescued him. And had raised him without throwing his hands up and leaving him tied to a post.

The little blond was grumpy enough not to ask whether Clement had shorts with the shirt he'd tossed over, too. (He didn't, they'd been washed yesterday.) He also didn't slow his usual stride as his little brother half scuttled, half crabwalked back to their rooms.

The retort was expected. Anticipated, even. Neither of them had ever liked the doctor, or medical professionals in general, but Jesse often took things to the next level by being openly combative with the person holding the needle. Clement used to wonder why no one had ever put them on a reality show. He didn't answer, just waited.

Leaning against the table in the common room opposite Jesse's door, Clement sighed, dumping his backpack on the floor. For the trillionth time, he wished he could just leave his brother to the grown-ups, let them deal with all the dirty looks and flailing and profanity. But he remembered too well his own struggles when he was by himself and how untrustworthy and suspicious adults had (and still) seemed.

But it wouldn't hurt the asshole to be a little cooperative.

Case in point, the battering ram impression he pulled coming out of his room. Which was also expected. Clement had been running after Jess for so long that their last school had wanted to put him on the varsity track team. And he could put someone down so fast the wrestling team had wanted him too.

He knew his bro never thought much about how Clement was feeling when his attitude was all angry jazz hands, something Clement resented more now that Jesse was older and more than a quarter of his brain functioned at the same time. He was tired - the night before swollen joints had kept him restless - and his head ached from trying to figure out chemical equations for three days.

So perhaps that worn patience with Jesse's antics brought his knee up to catch his brother in the groin. Clement did not have time today to fuck around.

Dragging his incapacitated sibling into his own room, literally, by one foot, he closed the door behind them and pulled up the kid's shirt.

Welp.

This was gonna be the total opposite of fun.

Forty-five of the longest minutes later, the wolf shifter collapsed onto his bed. He didn't care he had homework, didn't care he'd probably miss dinner, and didn't care that he ought to go to the class he'd missed to get his assignment.

He deserved, and was taking, a nap.

[Jesse Adams]

The knee to the crotch was hardly justified, and definitely not expected. The moment contact was made, Jesse shrieked out a less-than-dignified screech before dropping to the ground and trying to nurse himself. There were a number of names he wanted to call Clement, but none of them actually came out. Every time he tried, all he managed was a little grunt or a squeak.

The pulling also made him grunt, and though he mumbled a few swears and protests into the carpet, by the time the door shut, he knew he was stuck for good. Laying splayed on the floor, he just gave Clement a dirty look as his shirt was lifted, and tried to smack his hands away.

It didn’t do him much good.

Nor did the squirming, flailing, failed attempts at hitting, the headbutting, and swearing a blue streak. Clement won, like he always did, and by the time he was done Jesse lay panting on the floor. His stomach hurt worse now (probably from the squirming but he wasn’t going to admit to that), and as soon as he could muster up the strength, he struggled his way out, flinging insults at his brother as he left.

The door was slammed behind him, and the little blond stumbled into his own room. His door was also slammed shut, and for a moment he just seethed on his bed. Stupid Clement and his stupid not minding his own business. Any gratitude he’d had about being saved was out the window now. Eventually, he might actually understand that what Clement had done was for his own good, but right now? He was mad.

Mad enough to dump all of his schoolwork out of his backpack, and haphazardly stuffed handfuls of clothes into the now empty bag. He was running away. Clement didn’t even get a note this time, because Clement was the problem. He loved his big brother, but sometimes he went too far. Today was one of those days, and Jesse saw no problem with leaving the campus.

Within an hour, he’d left the school, backpack on his shoulders, and had ended up on a bus to Burlington. He didn’t really have a plan, except to get away from Clement. The school was secondary. It wasn’t like anyone was there to care about him anyway. He could run away and only Clement would notice. Maybe. When he stopped being a big jerk.

Jesse got off the bus at a random stop in the middle of Burlington. He’d never actually been this far away from the school since they’d first come to it, and he didn’t know where anything was. But that was okay. He had forever to explore the area and learn about it.

At least, he might have done, had a backfiring car not made him jump. Jesse twitched and then hissed in pain as he felt the familiar tug and jerk of his body changing. He’d been warned about shifting around non-meta people, but he couldn’t help it. His stupid body did it on its’ own and Jesus it hurt. Within a few minutes, where a thirteen year old boy had been standing previously, there was now a stilt-legged unicorn foal. His clothes were shredded, and his backpack had fallen off, but at least it hadn’t broken. Looking around, Jesse dropped his head and picked it up in his mouth before running clumsily away. Cars screeched to a halt in the road and horns blared, which only made the little colt run faster, his eyes wide. He’d only wanted to run away, not unicorn out in some place he didn’t know with everyone staring and pointing at him.

At least his legs were kind-of-sort-of cooperating today. He wasn’t tripping all over himself, but he wasn’t exactly going anywhere very fast, either. He just had to get away somewhere quiet and wait to change back. Then maybe he could figure out what to do. Something that didn’t involve going back to Hammel, and Clement, with his tail tucked between his legs.

[Clement Evans]

Yeah, Clement was such an asshole, making sure his little brother didn't get an infection or blood poisoning or necrosis. He'd definitely burn in hell.

Fingers in his ears muffled both door slams, and then he was facedown on his bed for his very well deserved nap. He figured Jess would make some sort of dramatic gesture to prove how abused and maltreated he was. There had been refusals to speak, which had actually been a relief for everyone; selective hunger strikes where he refused his vegetables or was clearly eating, just not at mealtimes; refusals to do chores at various homes or homework in general, unsuccessful due to the fact that 'my brother is being a dick' was not an acceptable excuse; and of course the I'll Run Away And You'll Be Sorry, aka Here, Have A Free Vacation From Me.

All Clement knew was that alone, his little bro could not function as a normal human being. He didn't know if that was his own fault or something wrong with Jesse, but for now just chalked it up to a severe deficit of common sense that would either resolve itself with time or land the kid in jail and thus leave him to become someone else's problem. Times like this, that latter could be comforting.

So he slept, guilt-free, though he knew, deep down, that when he woke up there'd likely be authority figures wanting to talk to him who started with, "About your brother..."

[Jesse Adams]

Yes, Jesse would maintain that Clement was a complete and total asshole for the next few hours. He would also be happy to blame his current predicament on his brother, because if he hadn't attacked him in the first place, none of this would have happened.

As a person, cars were not scary. As a baby unicorn with little control over his long spindle legs? They. Were. Terrifying. Horns blasted, people shouted, and the more noise that came at him, the faster he ran. He had to get away from the roads. People were looking, pointing, yelling, and he was panicking more.

He ran blindly for a while, not thinking, just moving. Finally, he found his way into a more residential area. Slowing to a trot, he dropped his head and heaved a sigh. His soft, silken coat felt wet from the panic induced run. The cool air felt good. Maybe he'd just rest a few minutes. Find a quiet yard to lay low in until he changed back and figured out a new plan.

The trot dropped to a walk, and he carefully began to search for open gates. No way was he going to try jumping again. After a few tries, he finally found one that was unlatched. He thought he heard noises coming from a neighbouring yard, so he'd be safe here, right?

Wrong. So very, very wrong.

The second he walked in, he froze, blue eyes widening in shock. In front of him were at least a dozen little girls in sparkly dresses, a cake on the table, and wrapping paper being strewn around. One caught sight of him, and the screaming began. His ears flattened in an effort to drown it out, but it was no use. They came running at him, arms around his neck, hands in his mane and tail, and there was absolutely no escaping.

"Clement? Clement, wake up! You gotta see this!" One of the shifters' roommates, Allen, tugged at Clement's shirt. "Seriously, come on!" Once Clement seemed semi-conscious, he ran back to the common room and pointed at the television. On the screen was a news report from Burlington. Normally none of the boys watched the news, but it was hard to look away when they were positive that the subject in question was someone they all knew. "Look! It's gotta be Jesse!"

In the background, behind the droning of the reporter, was indeed a baby unicorn, now coated thoroughly in frosting, streamers, and he looked terrified as yet another girl tried to hug him. Rearing backwards, he whinnied out a pained noise as he felt his body jerk and twist again. Moments later, there were more screams, and this time not ones of sheer delight.

Jesse was Jesse again. And very, very naked. Hello, America.

[Clement Evans]

Most times it was difficult to sleep in the boys' dorm during the day, what with the background noise of a couple hundred dudes between eleven and eighteen discovering the joys of college life way too early. So he was roused easier than usual, and from Allen's tone of voice... yep. Shuffling into the common room not bothering to cover his yawn, Clement regarded the TV.

Only Jesse could look that terrified of people trying to love him.

And only Jesse could have utter mortification at the prospect of more hugs completely overshadow being naked on television.

Everyone in the common room who'd come to gawk with equal parts horror and delight started when they heard the loud, unfamiliar sound. Clement laughing.

The truly sad part about all of this was that his blond bombshell brother would not take this as a learning experience, that his stupid actions created stupid situations. There was a very real chance that this would not be the last time Jesse appeared naked while being filmed by the media.

Rubbing his eyes as his laughter died down, Clement stretched, feeling his joints pop in that way that was totally unsatisfying and very painful. "Thanks for the show."

Turning to go back to bed, Allen said, "Wait, that's your brother!"

Clement looked a question at him.

"You have to help him."

"Last thing he said to me was that I was a flaming bag of dicks. Don't think he wants to see me." The shifter did not look displeased about that.

"Wait, shouldn't you tell someone?"

Clement shrugged. "They'll figure it out. There's a bunch of idiots yelling about it in the halls already."

"But..." Poor Allen looked indignant.

Turning back, Clement said, "You wanna go get him?"

"NO."

Clement nodded at that and went back into his room, locking his door. Back to nap it was.

[Jesse Adams]

Apparently, a naked teenage boy was far less acceptable than a baby unicorn when it came to unexpected guests at a birthday party. The screams did little to help the situation, and it was all Jesse could do to not scream himself. Instead, he steeled what few nerves he had left, grabbed his bag, and bolted.

Yes, this could have all been avoided if he hadn’t been such a little shit to his brother. But that would have involved admitting he was wrong, and he wasn’t very good at that.

He ran a few houses down the block before crouching between two and throwing on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. He’d already broken his sneakers, and he hadn’t had the brains to pack another set in his bag, so for now he had no choice but to hoof it barefoot. ... Or turn back into a unicorn, but that hadn’t gone so well for him the first time.

With his joints now feeling like they were on fire, he managed a slower pace down the sidewalk, willing his body to cooperate and not unicorn out to anything else. What he really wanted was a nap and some food, but neither were very likely to come anytime soon.

Part of him wanted to go back to Hammel, tail between his legs, but he didn’t even know where he was anymore. It was probably going to start getting darker in an hour or two, and then he’d really be screwed. What little money he had was tucked safely in his bag, but he wasn’t going to get him anything like an actual dinner or a room for the night...

This really had been the stupidest idea. He didn’t even own a cell phone to call Clement on to apologize and ask for help...

Unfortunately for him, looking as scruffy as he did, with a backpack that looked like it had been dragged backwards through the mud and no shoes, he was apparently a magnet for attention. It didn’t take long for a police car to slow down and for an officer to talk to him. Oddly enough, Jesse trusted the police, because they’d helped him and Clement when they’d first been taken away from their mother. After admitting he’d run away from school, they’d brought him to the station, and Hammel was contacted. Within an hour, one of the recruiters came to collect him and take him back.

After enduring a lecture about running away, and promising to attend a session with Dr Neville, Jesse slunk back to his room. His other two roommates were quick to tease him about his appearance on the news, but Jesse just ignored them and went to his room. A piece of paper was torn out from a notebook, and he wrote in big, messy letters ‘I’M SORRY CLEMENT.’ It was followed by a terrible drawing of a wolf, and he cautiously folded it in half and slid it under Clement’s door. He was sure he’d face another lecture, or have to do some grovelling, and that was surprisingly fine with him. He was just grateful to be home, and away from the screaming girls.